After we got off the train in Canterlot, we stayed in the train station and waved at Twilight’s friends as the train slowly started to pull out of Canterlot Station. From here, it would just be finding time to kill until Twilight grows wings sometime tomorrow night, or very early in the morning the next day. To be frank, I still don’t know what to do in Canterlot; I don’t spend a lot of time outside the castle. Cheerilee did decide to prolong her class’s field trip and get a tour from Celestia herself. So perhaps that’s something we could do.

“So why can’t we go to Ponyville?” Dan asked. “I was hoping to see what that place is like, given their Town Hall got blown up with bread apparently.”

“Because big, important stuff involving Twilight’s supposed to happen. As in growing wings, see the light, see inside herself and see… her, I guess. I don’t fuckin’ know. We both, me and Celly, decided it wasn’t necessary for Twilight to grow wings because democracy, but we decided ‘fuck it’ after Twilight did that little display of magic.” I explained. “And shit is supposed to get real shitty down in Ponyville while it happens; so we’re just gonna avoid your first day in Ponyville for now.”

“Source, that’s a crass way of saying Twilight will become a Princess.” Celly mused.

“Eh,” I shrugged. “You wouldn’t have me be some prissy noble that has my head shoved up my ass, would you?”

“No, no I wouldn’t. If you ever become that, I think I’d sit on you.”

“You know I like that-”

“Okay, you two need to stop,” Dan rolled his eyes. “Do not need to know what the fuck my brother and his wife get up into while in the bedroom alone!”

Celly and I snicker, before we ended up leaving the train station a few moments later. Cheerilee and her class were being escorted to the castle so every foal could get the luxury experience, in pairs of two, these pairs will get their own rooms in the guest hall of the castle. Complete with room service and everything they could want, mostly candy. With that said, Cheerilee took Button with her since he was still one of her students, and even asked about taking Dave along for the ride.

Dave agreed only because he was paired with Button; no funny business could be had with him and Diamond Tiara, because apparently that’s something that’s happening.

And I’m not seeing it happen, so clearly it doesn’t actually happen.

Katie decided, since in her words…

“It’s chilly,” she shivered and immediately went to me. “Wing, please.”

“But Celly’s a heated pillow,” I pointed out. That didn’t stop me from throwing a wing over her. “I feel like she’d be a better pony to be lended a wing from.”

“Mmm,” Katie shrugged. “But also I like this more.”

“Let your sister cuddle with you, dear,” Celly said, holding Ma in one of her wings. Ma, in question, was in a pony loaf, despite being held in the air. She purred at the warmth she was receiving. Dan found himself being snuggled up under Snowdrop’s wing as Luna tended to Tale. “Yes, I know you’re going to let her do that anyways, Source.” Celly giggled. “Your family got acquainted to how we ponies live, which in your words when you first came to Equestria:”

“Ponies are more cuddly than humans,” I droned. “But in all fairness, you had ulterior motives, you scheming devil… trying to woo my dumbass when I don’t know if you were trying to hit on me or be friendly.”

“...A bit of both,” Celly mused. “You were a friend that I just happened to have an interest in trying to court.”

Katie ended up riding on my back up until we got onto one of the lifts to the shopping disc of Canterlot, the second highest of the disk. The tallest had the castle on it. From there, we all piled into the lift, got situated… and a colt, a rich looking one, walked up to us while blatantly ignoring the fact that the rest of us were here. He bumped into Katie, she was walking while practically bumping into me every other step, pushing my sister into me and almost knocking Katie over.

“Hey there, good looking…”

Okay, so, here’s a fun little run down on Equestrian population analytics.

There’s just a lower birth rate of stallions than mares, almost by fifty percent, a foal is going to be female. This is why herds are commonplace; stallions sleep with many a mare, higher chance of popping a colt out. This is whatever. Most stallions get it, and most mares really don’t mind sharing a stallion as long as they all love each other. The problem is with these rich stallions and colts.

They think their dick is a gift, hence why Blueblood keeps trying his chances at every mare, but his personality is like sandpaper so nobody wants him. The problem then lies with the fact that most colts, amongst the snobs, are like this too.

Katie just about caught herself, before turning to check on me. “Are you alright, Kodi?”

“Meh, I’m fine,” I say, despite being knocked on my side. I sat back up and stretched. “You grew an annoyance to your right, though.”

Katie slowly turned to the rich lookin’ colt, who was wearing a designer suit. It would be adorable if it didn’t look like this guy was on the precipice of reaching maturity, as in he was around Dan’s age, if not a little older. The colt smiled. “C’mon, babe, I bet I could be way cooler to hangout with than this fossil,” he gestured to me. “Is he paying your parents to have your hoof in marriage? I’ll out bid them-”

“Ew, what the fuck?” I asked.

“Yeah, what?!” Katie asked, before turning up to Celly. “THERE’S ARRANGED MARRIAGES?”

“Amongst the upper class, yes,” Celly sighed.

“Oh… I think I saw the news about there being more additions to the Royal Family; perhaps you’re Princess Celestia’s new niece?” Dickhead asked.

“...I’m her sister in law, that’s my brother,” Katie pointed at me. "Why the fuck would I be marrying him? Isn’t fucking your sibling a bit fucked up?”

“...So would you like to hangout with me instead of your lame brother?”

“What do you honestly see in me-”

“I’d like to get you out of your dress-”

“Hey, youngin’,” Ma got between my sister and this asshole. “Get teh feck away from my daughter before I send you to jesus.” The asshole’s a unicorn, and Ma was making sure he knew he had an out… by letting all of her ambient magic out. “Get the fuck away from my daughter, you degenerate.” The asshole nodded quickly and ran off. “Christ in heavens, how are these rich asshat stallions so fuckin’ blind?” Ma asked.

“Hey, I resent that remark,” Tale said, he was half asleep on Luna’s back. “I think I’m a nice individual.”

“That’s because you are a gentlecolt,” Luna giggled. “By the way, we’re planning on getting married before the end of this year,” she announced. She teleported Tale off her back. “I’m so excited!” She hugged her sleepy coltfriend, who, despite his sleepiness, hugged her just as tightly as Luna was hugging him.

…

Holy shit. “God damn, Luna, Tale, congrats,” I clapped my hooves. “‘Bout time you two tied that knot, with how much I could hear you both having sex from your tower on the opposite side of the castle from Celly’s tower.”

“Oh please,” Luna rolled her eyes. “I still get flashbacks to you two going at it when I first got back from the moon.”

Our conversation quickly came to a halt when we saw Dan walk out of a store with a sucker in his mouth. In his magic was a bag full of candy. We all started staring at him, the whole darn time. “What? Y’all were bickering so much that I had enough time to get candy,” he offered a chocolate bar to Katie, which was promptly taken. My sister started nibbling on it as we went off on our way… Celly, like a foal, started pestering Dan for something from his candy bag.

“Can I get a Hoofsy roll?” Celly asked.

“No.”

“A Hoosfy pop?”

“I don’t even think I got one of those.”

“How about rock candy?”

“Why are you acting like this?” Dan asked.

“I would like to procure a treat,” my wife pouted. “And Source didn’t go get me something from the candy store; instead he decided to bitch at my sister about her bedroom activities.”

“Celly,” I shook my head and snickered. “You’re sleeping on the couch tonight.”

“...Please no; the couch isn’t big enough for me to stretch my legs.” Celly then brought her head back down to Dan’s level. “Can I get a Nickers bar? I need it because… do you see the level of abuse your brother puts me through?”

“Hmm,” Dan hummed. “I don’t know what that is, but it sounds like shitty American candy, a knock off of that shitty American candy.” Dan rustled through the bag with a hoof before pulling out the aforementioned Nickers bar, it was a nice and big, Princess Size one. “But yeah, my brother’s a dick. Make sure you pout at him, and he’ll be the one sleeping on the couch tonight.”

“That,” Celly hummed, her mouth was full of Nickers Bar. “Is a good point.” Before Celly could do anything else, I reached over and kissed her cheek. She blinked a few times. “And your brother drives a better point.”

“Y’know,” I hummed. “You and Luna haven’t taken my offer to turn yourselves into fillies for a day. Snowdrop could handle ruling the kingdom for the day, and then y’all can experience what it’s like to be foals for once, rather than thinking about how to behead that asshat of a Unicorn Lord at the ripe age of seventeen. Cuz I dunno about Equus, but your biggest concern at that age should be test scores and boys.”

“Perhaps I shall take you up on that offer after Twilight is crowned as a Princess.”

“Fair.” I nuzzled her. “And you know I wouldn’t make you sleep on the couch, because I’d end up sleeping on top of you. It’s way easier to do that on the bed.”

“Stop being gross,” Dan rolled his eyes. “You two are fucking disgusting.”

“Because we love each other?” Celly asked. “Your mother and Katie do not seem to mind. Luna and Tale don’t either.”

“That’s because Ma, Katie, and Luna are girls, and Tale’s weird.”

“Yer just mad because Rainbow sat her ass on your head for ten minutes because you called her fat,” I chimed in. “Be lucky you aren’t seeing how me and Celly act around each other alone. You’d be dying from diabetes with how we are around each other.”

Dan shivered at that. “Okay, yeah. But do you two have to be all snuggly and corny around each other while I’m here?”

“My dear brother in law,” Luna thwacked him with a wing. “My sister and I do not find mates very easily, and my sister is very fortunate in the fact that she still has Source to begin with. Your brother’s hanging on by a thread most of the time and was nearly lost several times in two different magical accidents that could’ve killed him. I believe that they deserve to be cheesy and ‘cute’ around each other.”

“Luna, if you make an offhoof comment about how Celly deserves that, but you don’t, I will tickle you, right here, in public.” I threatened.

“...You aren’t going to let me berate myself?”

“Yer a good mare,” Ma pointed out. “I woulda got on yer ass if you said you were anything less.”

Luna started blushing. “Fine, I suppose I shall have to take your compliments on the cheek… even if I do not believe I warrant them.”

We ended up piling on Luna for the night.

Dave

I don’t understand why the heck me and Button were supposed to be getting a ‘tour of Canterlot Castle’ like everypony else. Ms. Cheerilee didn’t seem to understand that I’m not a part of her class and Button lives here. That, or she just wanted us to both come along for the ride, and probably talked to Ma or Kodi about seeing if I would be interested in enrolling into her school. Button bumped shoulders with me and sighed.

“You don’t wanna be here either, do ya?” I asked. “Away from the family?”

“Not really, but I like seeing this as an opportunity,” Button shrugged. “You already know Apple Bloom, Sweetie Belle, and Scootaloo. They live down in Ponyville and I don’t get to hangout with them all the time, or often. So this seems like as good a time as any to spend some time with them. I know you didn’t really… say much while we were hanging out with them earlier.”

“...They seem a little energetic for my liking,” I admit. “They’re good kids, but…”

“Why do you sound older than Source does?” Button asks. “Like you sound like an old man, calling other foals… kids.”

“What does Kodi think of them?”

“Oh, Dad loves most of my classmates. He already knew Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle through their sisters, and he and Scootaloo get along just fine despite them not having much in common.”

“I’m surprised we aren’t getting swarmed by the rest of your classmates; they know you live here, right?”

“...I… Huh.” Button shrugged. “How aren’t you getting swarmed? As much as Dad tried to keep things under wraps, with Katie, you, and Dan existing, it’s pretty much out of the bag that y’all are related to him. Katie and Grandma just like Source… just one’s a mare, and the other’s a filly with inverts of Dad’s colors. Then with how Source was hanging out with Dan and Katie pretty much the entire time during the Unicorn Convention, everyone assumed that y’all were more than just students of Dad.”

“You didn’t use everypony,” I point out.

“Huh. I guess I picked it up from Dad.”

“Hey Button!” Apple Bloom and her two friends had caught up to us, as well as most of the class. “And hey Dave,” she waved at me.

“Howdy,” I nod to the fillies. “So… What brings you over here?” I asked.

“Cheerilee said that everypony had free reign of Canterlot as long as we stuck to our partners, and that we kept a map on us… Neither of y’all have a map.”

“Well, we live here,” I point out. “In Canterlot. My brother’s shown Button around a few times and-”

“Wait, yer brother!?” Sweetie Belle asked. She’s a bit of an airhead, so I let it pass. “Source is your brother?”

“Yeah, I’m technically Button’s uncle, but since I’m about Button’s age, it’d be pretty weird for him to call me that. Best friends, though!” I sat on my haunches and threw my forelegs into the air, just to bring them down onto Button. Button smiled, a little squeak escaped his cheeks as he smiled. This is something I’ve noticed; ponies are very squeaky for no reason. I’ve dubbed it ‘squee’ because it’s a squeak, but not high pinched enough to be a squeak. “So, where do y’all wanna head first?”

“Well, we could just go to the castle now…”

“Yeah, I would like to meet Princess Celestia.” Oh god.

“Diamond Tiara, Silver Spoon, what are you doing?” Apple Bloom asked.

“Oh,” Diamond Tiara rolled her eyes. “Don’t you all want to meet the Princess?” She asked. “Who wouldn’t?”

“Well,” I hummed. “I already did meet her, she’s married to my brother,” I pointed out.

“She’s my Mom,” Button added.

“And Source sometimes lets Celly teach me and Dinky when he tutors us,” Sweetie also chimed in. “she’s just a big mare, a really nice one, but…”

“...Celly?” Diamond asked.

“Yeah, Celestia lets us call her that,” Apple Bloom shrugged. “It’s a bit odd to not call her Princess, at first, but then Uncle Source said that she’d probably prefer it if we called her ‘Celly’ or ‘Celestia’ instead. Then it just started becoming natural.”

Silver Spoon decided now was a good time to speak up. “...Could you introduce us to her? Sorry about Diamond Tiara; she’s still trying to figure out how to be a bit more tactful.”

“Silver!” Diamond groaned. “Come-”

“You know I’m right.”

“...Yeah.” Diamond Tiara walked up beside me, brushed against my side, and then gave me puppy eyes. “Can you get your brother to introduce us to Princess Celestia?” She asked.

“I request an adult,” I slowly turned to the Crusaders and Button. “Please help me.”

“Is… something wrong with this?” Diamond Tiara asked.

“Yer confusing that colt, Diamond Tiara,” Apple Bloom sighed.

“I mean, I can ask Kod- Source, but I dunno if they’ll say yes. I know my brother’s been meaning to check in on you since the last time he spoke with y’all.” I shrugged. “Admittedly, I don’t know what happened, but apparently you have history with him.”

“...So I might just want to thank Mr. Code for saving me from my mother; my Dad wants to speak with him too, which is why he’s in Canterlot with the rest of Cheerilee’s class.”

Button perked up. “Oh, I see, now! C’mon, let’s go get your dad!”

Source

I found myself sitting in a lounge room, just behind where Celly’s throne is. Despite Celly deserving some rest from the week long train ride, she decided to have day court and I decided to help her. Somepony in particular showed up and it was kinda interesting. Sitting in front of me was Filthy Rich, Diamond Tiara’s dad. He’s a pretty well-groomed fellow, though he lacked his business collar that I usually saw him wearing around Ponyville, in fact, he’s pretty much naked save for a bowtie that made him look pretty snazzy.

“Pleasure to finally speak with you,” Filthy greeted. He said after taking a sip of coffee. “To be frank, you’re… rather-”

“You can call me short… I’m assuming you’d rather go by your last name; being known as Mr. Filthy sounds like a fun thing to go by, but Mr. Rich sounds cooler.”

“...I do. Why would Mr. Filthy sound fun?”

“Could be a fun name for a cleaning product.” I comment.

“...I may need to rename one of my products to that then. It would be pretty humorous.”

“And humor can help sell a product,” I point out.

“That it can.” He sighed. “Okay, you and I both know that I’m not just here for a friendly conversation, though it is the majority of it… You sent me a message along with a crystal on… your birthday I believe? I know it has some importance, since it was a Pinkie Party. As much as they aren’t for me, I knew Diamond Tiara does particularly enjoy hanging out with Silver Spoon during those; those two are adorable together.” He chuckled. “What I saw in that Crystal, once you told me how to use it… was an eye opener, Mr. Code.”

“Call me Neo,” I chuckled. “Uh, don’t mind that, it’s a dumb joke nobody will get. Call me Source.”

“Okay, Source… My wife was… I know she can be a bit unpleasant at times, and sometimes I'd greet my daughter at dinner and she has a little extra makeup on, but I’d never expect it to turn out that my wife was abusing our daughter. Well, Spoiled Milk was my wife, at least. I had to hire a manager for all my companies, so I could spend more time with Diamond Tiara, but it was worth it. I make more than enough money to not have a hooves on approach to any of my companies.

“This all boils down to… thank you. I know my daughter probably didn’t leave the best impression on you, or anypony. I know she bullied a little group of fillies… but after I forced my wife out of my home, Diamond Tiara’s opened up with me more. It… feels good.”

“Ha, enjoyin’ yer life with your daughter, aye?” I chuckled. “But uh, yeah, don’t thank me. To be frank, I hate seeing somepony treat their foals so poorly. From what I hear, you’re a respectable fellow. I just gotta ask… how good was your ex in bed to put up with her bullshit?”

“...Not good enough. Her parents had to pay me to marry her.” Filthy chuckled. “Granted, she’s why I have my daughter now, but… She was…”

I snorted. “A fuckin’ whore,” I interupted. “But yeah, your daughter’s pretty sweet as it turned out. She responded to my tickling my grabbing my muzzle-”

“And licking your nose?” Filthy clapped his hooves. This is probably a side of himself that he doesn’t show often in public. “It’s so sweet!” He sighed. I seriously wish to thank you, Mr. Code. Thank you so much.”

“Thank me by continuing to treat your kid well-”

“And… that’s where Source is.” The window was opened and Button, and Dave, piled in through it.

“That’s… those are your sons?”

“Button’s my son, he’s the brown little unicorn. The cyan one’s my little brother…” Huh. Dave is notably smaller than the other foals, despite being roughly around their age, if not older than everyone by a year. “Who’re you talkin’ to, Dave?” I asked.

Dave pointed to the fillies floating out the window. All of whom are taking things in differently. Sweetie Belle is using a Skywalker Spell, so she’s floating on her own. She follows soon after Button and lands beside him. Scootaloo is enjoying not being on the ground for once. Apple Bloom, Silver Spoon, and Diamond Tiara were holding onto each other for dear life; they wanted to plant their hooves on something solid and never let go of solid ground ever again. They were levitated into the room, with Scootaloo being levitated in last.

“...Your son and… brother?” Filthy chuckled. “They’re quite marvelous when it comes to magic, as it seems.”

“That they are.” I nod. “You’re surprisingly relaxed about this whole thing… but…”

“I live in Ponyville,” Filthy chuckled. “Diamond Tiara, why were you being carried through the air by Source’s son and two of his students?”

Diamond Tiara, Apple Bloom, and Silver Spoon all realized that their hooves were touching solid ground again, which made them realize that they were hugging each other. After a second of me and Rich pretending like that wasn’t an adorable sight, and totally forgetting it, Diamond Tiara sat on the couch her dad was on, after removing her tiara, and nuzzled into his side. D’aw.

“I wanted to speak with Source,” Diamond Tiara almost whispered. “So I tried getting Button and Dave to introduce me to Princess Celestia… because I thought she’d ‘introduce’ me to Source.”

“She was being a little snooty about it, aye?” Dave chuckled. “A bit, but after Silver Spoon went and blurted out what Diamond Tiara actually wanted… Here we are! All without botherin’ Celly one bit!”

“So,” I started. “How’s life going, Diamond Tiara? Heard your mom got tossed out in the streets.”

“She did,” Diamond Tiara confirmed. “Life’s been going better, since Dad’s taking more time off to make sure I’m not lonely at home. We have butlers and maids, but that isn’t really… the same as having Dad around. I would say ‘Mom’ too, but…”

“Yeah, I get it.” shrugged. “I heard from Dave,” I gestured to my little brother, who was now being dogpiled on by the Crusaders after he pounced on Scootaloo. “That you were chasing him, hmm?” I kept the grin on my face to a minimum.

“...Is that a problem?” Diamond Tiara asked.

“Nah, he’s my little brother, not my kid. What he does is his thing, and to be honest, it’s adorable and you’re both too young to be seriously considering each other. Just be a bit careful; I’m like… two and a half times older than he is, and he makes me feel stupid sometimes.”

“...I know.”

“Hey Apple Bloom,” Dave said, his voice was kinda muffled since the filly was sitting on his head. “I think you just got your cutie mark. Same with Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo!” Oh, you devious little bastard.

“Really!?” All three fillies jumped off of Dave, who quickly dived under my couch, and all got disappointed.

“...Dave, did you lie to us just so we’d stop beating you up?” Scootaloo asked. Button started snickering; the fact that the fillies fell for it, and that Dave is likely going to die if he crawls out from under the couch any time soon.

“So maybe I did.” My little brother snickered, before crawling out from under the couch. “It wasn’t fair. The moment I try to wrestle with Scootaloo, I get jumped by three fillies! And Button, I thought we were cool, mate! Nah, you let your filly friends beat me up!”

“In all fairness…”

“Fuck you!” Dave hopped on my back and grabbed my neck. “Don’t you dare jump at me, Scootaloo, I have a hostage!”

Rich just sat in awe, mostly because Dave swore in front of him.

“Dave, please stop.” I whispered.

“Roll with it, please,” Dave whispered back. “I’ll owe you big time if you do.”

“But I like having my neck, and also I like not being used as a meat shield.”

“Source, is this normal?” Rich asked.

“This in particular is new, but yeah, this is basically what I’ve come to expect.”

Later in the evening, Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon, along with the Crusaders all had to go to the guest wing of the castle. Me and the whole family were sitting on a balcony, sharing a bottle of whisky, though Button and Dave were being given shots of apple juice instead of fucking whisky. Mostly because this particular whisky was pretty damn strong.

So something in Ponyville blew up. That’s nothing new. What is new, is that me and the whole family, Celly included since she ended day court a bit early, was the type of explosion and the shape of the explosion. It was a magical explosion, one that happened right in Twilight’s library, where she was probably keeping the unfinished Starswirl spell. On top of that, the explosion happened to be in the shape of Twilight’s cutie mark.

“What the fuck?” Ma asked.

“What?” I asked.

“What is wrong with that tiny little town? It looks so nice, so peaceful, and BOOM! A fuckin’ explosion!”

“Yeah, that’s Ponyville. It’s pretty fun to be in, with how chaotic it can be at times,” I chuckled. “Didya know that Twilight got in trouble once for mentally manipulating everyone in Ponyville with a magically enchanted doll with a Want It Need It spell? Basically, you see the doll, it makes you want it, and thus need it.” I chuckled. “Ah shit, that was fucking fun, if only I wrote about how it happened in my journal, since me and Celly had to go down and solve that shit.”

Mostly Celly.

“What? That sweet little mare did what? Ain’t that incredibly illegal?” Ma asked.

“Eh, she was having an episode and went a little extra fucking crazy,” I nodded to my wife. “Ain’t it about time that you head on down to Ponyville and stuff?” I asked.

“I believe it is.” Celly spreaded her wings. “Don’t worry, Maeve, this was planned.”

“...Okay. I’m just going to…” Ma downed the whole fucking bottle. “Forget that Magical Horse Land is fucking strange… I’m going to go lay down for a bit.

This was NOT apart of the fucking plan.

WHY WAS I NOT TOLD OF THIS PART OF THE FUCKING PLAN!?

So Twilight’s getting crowned as the Princess of Friendship and Magic. That’s pretty cool. It’s actually kinda neat, and Twilight was incredibly excited about it. Most of the last week was spent on getting dresses for everypony, Celly and Luna dug out their old coronation ceremonial dresses which were used when they took the crown, and when Cadance… well, got her crown as well in Celly’s case. Cadance and Shining Armor ended up using DragonFire to get here on time, and were getting a suit and dress tailored for them.

Fuck, even Snowdrop was getting a dress since she was a High Princess of Equestria. Solar was to stand next to her in ceremonial guardsman armor.

Tale was getting a suit and all he had to do was stand next to Luna.

So since I’m married to Celly I should stand next to her, right? WELL I GUESS FUCKING NOT!?

“Why?” I asked. I was being fitted into a suit, Twilight and the other princesses were stuffed into a room watching me get changed. “I thought you loved me,” I pouted.

“I do love you, Source,” Celly nuzzled me. “If it makes you feel any better, your suit looks rather dashing on you, you know.”

“I hate you.” I grumbled.

“No you don’t.”

“Okay, no I don’t. But why am I also getting crowned? I thought I was only a High Prince through the title alone.”

“Well, it was a long time coming,” Celly mused. “You are an alicorn, Twilight is an alicorn now, everypony in this room, save Snowdrop, is an alicorn. And Snowdrop would register as one if her talisman were an actual horn.”

“I don’t wanna be crowned, or dubbed, or given any fancy feckin’ title, Celly.”

“Come on, Source, it’ll be a great day for all of us! And then after the ceremony is done, we’ll get back on the train and head to the Crystal Empire for the Royal Summit!”

“Celly changed the fucking name because I’m not a Princess, Twilight!” I groaned. “Celly, please just shove your hoof through my skull.”

“Nope. You’re becoming an actual High Prince whether you like it or not.” Celly said, finally getting the suit on me, which was impressive since I laid on the floor the whole time. She set me on my hooves after the suit was on me, so I wouldn’t ruin it. Because I don’t want to get stuck in a bath, while wearing the suit, I stayed on my hooves. “Why are you so against becoming an actual Prince?”

“...It just doesn’t feel like what I am. I know it’s dumb, of me to assume this wouldn’t happen, since I’m married to you, Celly, but…” I sighed. “I don’t want people treating me any differently than they have treated me before. Yeah, I may have gotten some street cred for taking on everypony in that exhibition match, and some ponies do recognize that I’m a prince… but that’s usually few and far between, and for the most part, I’m treated normally.

“I’m not special, I’m not a good leader, I’m probably a shitty politician, and sometimes I have a hard time believing that I’m actually married to you, Celly. I…” I sighed. “Just give Twilight this, it’s her big day, not mine. She’s talented, more so than I believe myself to be a lot of the time. I’m half the man you think I am, and don’t know if I’m even worthy to be considered your equal, or Luna’s, or Cadance’s equal.”

Twilight then bopped me on the nose. “Source, have some more bucking confidence in yourself!” She shouted. “Seriously, you’re saying you’re nothing special, when you’re fucking WRONG! Can you name anypony that’s made a new spell system, let alone three, in the last thousand years?! Because I can only list Starswirl the Bearded. You’re special, Source. You deserve to stand on that stage today just as much as I do. Despite everything that you’re capable of, you’re humble… no, you simply shit on what you’re capable of! We all thought you were a little more confident in yourself after that exhibition match, Source!”

I just… “Wow.” I chuckled. “Feck, Twilight.” I sighed. “Shit, Twi, holy fuck…” I sighed. “I dunno what to say to that. You’re right on the fact that I… can’t be proud of who I am.” A small chuckle left my mouth. “I just want today to be about you Twilight. I’ll take the crown, I’ll take a ceremony later, but today’s about you, not me. Just please, not on a day that should be about Twilight Sparkle.”

“...Dear?” Celly nuzzled me. She sighed. “That thread keeping you together is rather thin, isn’t it?” She asked.

“Meh, it’s nothing new, just an identity crisis I’ve been having since arriving in Equestria.” I shrug. “Sorry about that, Celly. I’ll do whatever you want me to do today. Just when you said I’d actually be getting a crown, I started having a bit of a spiral ever since. I… Uh…” I chuckled. “Yeah, I’m a mental mess.” Celly sighed and started rubbing my back with a wing. “Sorry if I ruined your day, Twilight.”

“You didn’t, Source,” Twilight rolled her eyes. “I’m just tired of you berating yourself or saying you’re nothing special. Granted, it’s a sign that-”

“I’m a mess, I know.” I shrug. “C’mon,” I smiled. “Let’s get you crowned, you give your speech, and I’ll silently take a crown in the background, and give a speech and publicly announce it later down the line.”

“If that would work best for you, then… sure,” Celly rubbed my back. “We’ll hold off on actually giving you a crown… for now.”

Feck. At least when I take it, I’ll know I’m ready.

“One, two, one two three.”

The ceremony was said and done, Twilight’s officially a Princess now. I was crowned too, but nobody really noticed it since I stayed glued by my wife the whole time. The speech Twilight gave was short, simple and to the point. The parade was pretty cool, even though the ambient magic in the air made me fucking sing. Something I couldn’t help but take note of was… a purple unicorn in the crowd. One that looked eerily similar… to Starlight Glimmer, the unicorn I met while fighting the evil, fucked up versions of my princesses. Something… her mane was different from the other Starlight. The entire time, she wasn’t cheering, or smiling, or waving. She stared at me the whole time, with a cold, calculating look in her eyes.

Her eyes fell on Ma as she happily sat, smiled, and waved next to me on our parade float.

Nobody noticed Starlight save for me… She just ran a diagnostic spell. Her eyes widened, and a small, ever so slight smile graced her face, before she ducked into the crowd.

…

I really hope I’m just seeing things, or maybe she was just… I don’t fucking know.

Hopefully this timelines Starlight was nice. God I hope so.

Meh, Starlight’s out of sight and thus out of mind now. A grin grew on my face as I jumped off the parade float and ran ahead to go tackle Twilight, while she’s singing… How the fuck is she flying already?

Author's Note

hmmm. I can't wait to get to involve Starlight Glimmer later, but first, Tirek needs to get plowed into the ground. and Discord needs to finally make an appearance in this timeline instead of outside of it.