Apple Hospitality

You find Big Mac near a cart filled with baskets in the middle of a dense section of the orchard. As you approach, you watch him grab an empty basket, position it near a tree, buck the tree, and hurriedly try and grab the basket to catch the falling apples. He isn't quite quick enough and misses several, setting the basket down to toss them in the basket.

As he turns to another tree, he notices you approaching and says, "Wondered when you'd show up."

You wince, "Sorry man... Applejack was desperate to stave off the boredom, but eventually shoved me out."

"S'okay," he shrugs his shoulders, "See what I was doin'?"

"Yeah. Grab an empty basket, catch the falling apples. I'm guessing each basket fits a few trees' worth of apples, then take the full basket back to the cart and swap with another empty basket?"

"Eyup."

You pick up the basket he started and say, "I'll do my best... but please remember I don't have earth pony strength or endurance. To be honest, I wouldn't even be considered very fit for a human back home." You sigh and add, "Point is, I'm sorry if I'm too slow or we have to stop for breaks."

He nods and you finish, "Alright, I guess let's go."

Turns out, it wasn't as difficult as you worried. You've no idea how, but when he bucks a tree, somehow all the apples fall down roughly from one spot among the leaves, making it easy to catch them in the basket. Even watching an apple on the other side of the tree doesn't give any answers--it just seems to shake off its branch directly toward the same place all the other apples go. You suspect some magic is being used on the farm after all--earth pony magic.

What this means for you is that the hardest part of the job is carrying the full baskets back to the cart. You do miss apples occasionally, but with your 'nimble monkey hands,' you collect the fallen apples quickly and easily.

You know Big Mac doesn't like to talk too much, so you just work in companionable silence for a while. However, as the trees go on and on, you find yourself getting increasingly bored. You start trying to think of something to ask Big Mac, but nothing seems important enough that he'd say more than five words in response. Besides, you keep having to step away to change baskets, so any conversation would be interrupted every couple of minutes anyways.

So you just continue working in silence and wind up lost in your thoughts. It's only when you set down your latest full basket that you realize Big Mac followed you to the cart instead of getting ready at the next tree to buck.

"What's up?" You ask.

He walks around to the front of the cart and hooks himself in, "Cart's full."

"Oh." You fall in step beside him and turn back to look at the cart. Each basket was heavy enough that you struggled to carry it twenty feet back to the cart, and yet Big Mac is casually hauling a cart with at least two dozen baskets as if he's taking a leisurely walk through the park.

You're thinking of asking just how much weight he can really pull when he surprises you by talking first, "Listen, Anon... Y'know I ain't much for talkin' or expressin' my feelings, but, well... I got a bit of talkin' to do, so bear with me here."

You suddenly feel worried, "Alright, I'm listening... is something wrong?"

He shakes his head, "Nope. Just the opposite: wanted to say I appreciate whatever ya been doin' with Apple Bloom."

You don't know what you were expecting, but it wasn't that.

"...Huh? Really?"

"Eyup. Like I said a while back, Apple Bloom was too young to remember our parents very well, so I'm the only stallion she's ever spent real time with, an' well... I ain't exactly great with foals." He sighs heavily, still walking like he hasn't even noticed the thousand-fucking-pounds of apples hanging from his shoulders. "Now I don't know what you're really tryin' to go for with Apple Bloom, but it looks to me like you're bein' a darn good substitute for a father figure." He looks away uncomfortably and continues, "She could never see me as anythin' more'n her big brother... an' while I can't say I don't wish it was me 'stead o' you... well, I'm glad she's finally got someone like that in her life."

Unexpected emotion wells in your chest and you find yourself at a loss for words. When you don't respond, Big Mac looks back to you curiously. Still speechless, you just give him a little smile.

His ears droop and he looks away, "I know I shouldn't a said nothin'. Now I gone an' got ya upset. I'm sorry, Anon. I just ain't good with words."

You struggle to find your voice, "N-No, Mac. I'm not upset, really. I'm happy... really happy. Thank you for saying that."

He looks back up, obviously surprised. You swallow the lump in your throat and continue, "I, uh... I never got along with my family back home. Felt like I was the only normal person surrounded by new and inventive kinds of asshole. What few 'friends' I made weren't much better."

You take a few quick steps and get in front of him, forcing him to stop. You meet his gaze, your two heads about the same height.

"See, when I first came here to Equestria, it was like a new beginning for me... but I still couldn't really get along with any... anypony. Only pony that really treated me like a friend was Twilight, and I always figured it was just out of guilt for bringing me here in the first place." You rub your upper arms, trying to calm the shakes you always get when expressing your emotions. "When I took this job, I hoped maybe one of you could be my first real friend here, or at the very least that spending time with you would improve other ponies' opinions of me in town, and maybe then I could make a friend indirectly thanks to you Apples."

Big Mac just stares at you, his expression neutral.

"But since my very first day... the four of you have been nothing but welcoming. I, uh... At first I thought I'd just got lucky when Applejack befriended me so quickly, but then Granny welcomed me with open... uh, open hooves, and then Apple Bloom warmed up to me..." You groan impatiently. "Sorry, I'm rambling. Point is, I thought I was lucky to befriend even one of you. With all four of you being so nice, I, uh... well, it feels like you aren't just friends... it's like y'all are the closest I've ever had to a real f-family."

You choke on the last word and just stand there silently, trying to keep your composure in front of the stoic stallion. He stares at you impassively for a few seconds, then slowly steps back, sliding his head out of the heavy duty work horse collar and stepping under where it hangs from the cart.

Slowly, almost awkwardly, he steps forward and stops directly in front of you with a smile. Then suddenly, he hooks one hoof around your neck and pulls you into a rough embrace. He only holds it for a couple of seconds before letting go and turning back to his cart.

Stunned, you can only stand there as he gets back into his work collar. He nickers as he begins pulling the cart again, forcing you to come to your senses and step out of the way. As he passes, you turn and continue walking beside him.

Seems that's all he needed to say.

You and Big Mac continue collecting apples until well after the sun sets. It takes about an hour to go through a cart of baskets, after which you and Big Mac head back to the farmhouse, dump every basket into their apple storage, then head back out into the orchard.

By the second time you left the farmhouse with empty baskets, you were starting to get sore and, with Big Mac's permission, began riding the cart back and forth to rest. He barely even seemed to notice your extra weight among the half ton of apples. By the fourth trip, your legs and shoulders were furious and you had loaded a bucket of water into the cart to drink and occasionally splash in your face. Big Mac finally started to seem a bit sluggish.

The sun went down as you approached the farmhouse for the fifth time, and by your sixth time returning, your entire body glowed with pain, your lower back and ankles especially, feeling as if they were filled with liquid hellfire. Big Mac finally asked you not to ride the cart and his head bobbed low as he strolled along.

When you return with the seventh cart and finished dumping its apples into the storage bin, you toss the last empty basket into the cart and sit heavily on the ground.

"Mac... I can't go out there again. I'm dying, man."

The stallion flops to the ground and heaves a great sigh, "Hoped ya'd say that two hours ago."

You laugh weakly and gently lay your aching body on the ground as you say, "Coulda fuckin' said something... I only kept going 'cause you were."

He nickers and you both just lay there, breathing heavily.

What feels like years later, Apple Bloom trots up, "There ya are! Y'all gonna come eat or what?"

You laugh, then wince and groan at the resulting jolt of pain, "If I can survive standing up, I'll eat everything you own."

Apple Bloom giggles and trots back inside. Big Mac shuffles and slowly rises somewhere to your right. He steps over to you and nudges your shoulder with a hoof.

"C'mon ya colt, I'll help you up."

"Colt!?"

You swat away his hoof and focus on standing up, trying to minimize your groaning and wincing while your body ignites with fire anew. Having successfully climbed Mount Everhoof--or whatever mountains are called here--you smile, poke his snout, and imitate his accent.

"I ain't needin' no help from no pony!"

Turning, you take a wobbly step toward the farmhouse and stumble against the cart. With a soft chuckle, Big Mac steps up next to you and you lean onto him as you both start walking.

"This is fine though," you mumble, "Because you're not a pony... you're a goddamn machine. How much can you carry, anyways?"

"Not much more'n I just did."

"I mean all at once, on a good day."

"Dunno. Ain't found nothin' too heavy yet."

"You oughta get with Bulk Biceps, find out one day."

"Might just do that."

You groan again as you reach out and open the farmhouse door. A sweet and savory smell envelops you and you see Granny Smith poke her head out from the kitchen and say, "There ya are, finally! Git over 'ere, food oughta still be warm."

You wobble over and collapse at the short dining table beside Applejack, wincing as your twist your arm into your back pocket for your utensils.

Applejack turns to you, looking worried, "Anon... have you done an' overworked yerself?"

Big Mac answers before you can, "Eyup."

She gives the stallion a hard glare, "An' y'all let him!?"

"Uh... yup."

Her tail flicks and she opens her mouth angrily, then her eyes dart to Apple Bloom across the table and she takes a slow breath first.

"Mac, I know y'all know better'n that. Doin' too much work one day means doin' not enough work for the next two while ya recover.

He sighs and lowers his head, "Eyup... he hides it well, though. Didn't realize how tired he really was." He looks up at you, "Ya did good. Real good. Went a lot longer'n I expected. But AJ's right. No work for two days, at least."

You grin weakly at him, "Can't say I'm sad to hear that, but what about you? You worked your, uh, your tail off too."

Applejack touches your forearm with a hoof and you turn back to her, "Meanin' no offense, Anon, but earth ponies are already a lot stronger'n more durable than you, an' Mac n' I are especially fit 'cause of how much work we do here on the farm. Tomorrow y'all won't even be able to tell Mac was ever tired."

Granny interrupts Applejack by thrusting her head between the two of you and growls, "If'n ya don't eat yer darn food in front o'ya, I'll make sure ya don't never recover!"

She cackles at your terrified face, then taps your cheek with a hoof, her expression softening, "Relax, dearie, ah'm just pullin' yer leg. Ah ain't about to hurt the best thing's come to this farm since lil' Apple Bloom 'ere." Her hoof thrusts hard into your cheek and forces your head to turn to your plate, "But yer gonna eat right now or so help me Celestia, I'll shove it down yer throat mahself!"

The other three laugh and Granny whips her head around, "That goes fer you too, McIntosh! Quit yer laughin'!"

He shuts up and immediately buries his snout in his plate. Apple Bloom covers her muzzle with both hooves trying to stifle her giggles.

You pull out your fork and scoop up some of the sweet smelling mush, "What is it?" You take a bite without waiting for an answer.

Granny walks around the table to her own mostly-eaten plate, then says, "Egg'n ham hashbrowns."

You gasp and choke on your mouthful, coughing wretchedly and causing a fresh wave of agony to lance through your torso. Applejack rubs your back and, as the coughing fit subsides, you force out a few words.

"Eggs and ham?"

Granny's ears swivel uncertainly, "Ham? Naw, ah said 'yam.' Y'know, sweet 'taters? What's ham?"

Apple Bloom's ears perk up, "Ah never heard of ham! Is it good?"

Applejack chuckles, "Apple Bloom might be small, Anon, but she's got the appetite of a horse. If there's a new food out there, she'll be dyin' to try it."

Well shit.

"Uh... it's uh... w-well..." You trail off and sit there, staring wide-eyed at your plate.

Granny turns to Apple Bloom, "Junebug, be a dearie an' fetch mah sweater from upstairs, if'n ya please? These ol' bones get cold too easy."

"Sure thing, Granny!"

She hops up and trots away. As soon as she turns the corner, Granny leans over the table and murmurs, "It's meat, innit?"

Your jolt of surprise as you look up at her is all the answer she needs and she sits back down smugly.

Applejack looks at you, surprised, "Meat? Ya mean... meat meat? Like, dead animal meat?"

You nod dumbly and Granny taps the table lightly, "Monkeys eat meat sometimes, Applejack. Figured a human like Anon, bein' somethin' close to a monkey, might do as well." The old mare points a hoof after the filly, "She'll be a while still--my sweater ain't even up there. Any o' y'all wanna say somethin'?"

Applejack stares at you for a few seconds, then looks down, seeming lost in thought. "Ponies can digest meat an' I heard some ponies actually do eat it, but I ain't never known somepony that has. It always seemed so... wild." She whispers the last word almost fearfully.

She lowers her head slightly and whispers to you, her face a mixture of fear and fascination, "...Is it good?"

You look to Granny and Big Mac and, though they seem mildly curious, they don't really seem to care. You look back to Applejack's intense, eager expression.

You lean close to murmur in her ear, "Like you wouldn't believe. I miss it every day."

Her eyes widen, "What've you eaten?"

Still murmuring quietly, you begin naming animals, starting with ones that you're pretty sure are still dumb here in Equestria, uncertain how she'll take it, "Shrimp, lobster, crab, alligator, a bunch of kinds of fish... chicken, turkey, duck..." When she doesn't react, you turn your head to watch her expression as you continue, "Deer... pig... buffalo, sheep and... even cows."

Her eyes slowly widen and her mouth drops open, but at the word 'cows' she gasps and twitches her head back, turning to look you in the eyes, "You didn't!" Her tone is shocked, even hurt, but her eyes betray her burning desire.

You'd almost swear that desire was for you, not the meat.

She drops back to a whisper, "W-What was your... your favorite?"

You grin wickedly, quite conscious now of how that shows off your canine teeth, "Shrimp is pretty damn good, and I always loved turkey... but my favorite is cow."

"Granny!?"

At Apple Bloom's voice, Applejack jolts upright just as the filly trots into the room. You turn to your plate and try to nonchalantly continue eating.

"Ah couldn't find yer sweater, so ah brought y'all this blanket instead! Ah hope it'll be warm enough."

"Oh, thank ya much, dearie, this's just right."

Apple Bloom sits back at her plate, then looks up at Applejack, who is sitting rigidly upright and staring straight ahead. "Uh... y'all okay, sis?"

Applejack jerks her head down to the filly and forces a nervous laugh, "Oh! Yeah, yeah, I'm just fine an' dandy! I'm, uh, pretty tired though, so I'm a gonna go upstairs and turn in. See y'all tomorrow mornin'!"

She gets up and slowly hobbles out the kitchen and you wolf down one more mouthful, trying to hurry so you can help her up the stairs. In your hurry, you forget your body hates you right now and try to stand too quickly. Your body locks up and you groan loudly, stuck halfway between sitting and squatting. Big Mac scoots closer and wraps his hooves around your torso, supporting you as you slowly stand up.

"Applejack, wait! Don't you climb those stairs alone!"

"Ah, go buck--"

Granny interrupts her harshly, "OY! Watch yer language, missy!"

Apple Bloom stifles another giggle as Applejack tiredly says, "Fiiiine, c'mon Anon, let's hobble up the stairs together.

She winds up helping you up the stairs as much as you help her, and fortunately she's able to hop up into bed by herself. She hands you her hat so you can hang it up on the wall, then you sit heavily on the edge of her bed, rub your face, and yawn hugely.

"Holy hell... I haven't been this tired in years... Ugh, and I'm gonna be even more stiff and sore when I wake up. AND I still have to walk home!"

She scoots over to sit beside you, "Where do you hurt the worst?"

"Yes."

She hesitates, then barks a short laugh, "Alright, smart-ass, where do you want me to start?"

You turn to her, confused, "Start?"

She rolls her eyes and scoots behind you. You try to see what she's doing but you're way too stiff to look behind you, "Wait, what're you--AHH!"

Something jabs into your shoulder, causing an explosion of pain and you bend forward to get away.

"What the fuck! The hell was that!?"

Her head leans around you and into view, "Uh... a massage?"

"For what, a tree!?"

Her ears fold down and she turns away, looking hurt, "Just tryin' to help... Ain't like I've had much practice."

Dammit, she's almost as good at that pitiful face as her little sister. It is just straight up impossible to stay angry at these adorable ponies.

You slowly sit back upright and sigh, "Ugh, sorry... you just surprised me, freaked me out a bit. You can try again if you want, just... be gentle please. Very gentle."

She hesitates, "Ya sure you really want me tryin' again?"

You nod tiredly, "Oh yeah, I'd honestly love a massage. Haven't had one since I came here to Equestria and I've probably never needed one more."

She quirks her mouth and nods, her head pulling out of sight behind you. You twitch in anticipation as her hoof lightly touches your back. So lightly, in fact, that you can barely even feel it.

You chuckle, "Okay, maybe a little less gentle."

She digs her hoof in a bit, rubbing the top of your right shoulder near your neck. A groan escapes your lips and she immediately pulls her hoof back.

"...Huh? Wait, no, keep going, that felt incredible!"

"B-But, that sounded like it hurt! If ya weren't, how am I 'sposed to know when to stop?"

You grin, "You're cute when you worry, but don't. Just, ease up if I wiggle away or say something like 'wait' or 'stop,' but otherwise, holy shit please keep going."

She pauses for a few seconds and you consider outright begging her to continue, then her hoof presses into the same spot. You grunt and your neck immediately relaxes, head flopping down to your chest. Save for your soft, uncontrollable moaning, the room is quiet for several minutes.

Applejack suddenly stops and you heave your incredibly heavy head back upright, "What's... oh, hey Big Mac."

The stallion was standing in the open bedroom doorway, looking very awkward, "Uh... I was... just wonderin' what y'all were doin'."

Applejack hisses fiercely, "Git yer mind outta the manure, Mac! Shut the buckin' door an' go to bed!"

He snorts and as he closes the door you hear him mutter, "Was Granny's idea..."

You turn your head as far as your neck will let you and can just barely see Applejack from the corner of your eye, "What was that about?"

She shifts away a little and says, "Never you mind. C'mere an' lay down so I can massage you proper-like."

You bring your knees up onto the bed so you can twist around more to face her.

"Look, I appreciate you doing this, Applejack, but I should really be going. It's getting late and I'm gonna doze off where I sit if I don't start moving soon."

She snorts, reaches out with a hoof, and abruptly you find yourself laying face down on her bed. You lift your head off her pillow, sputtering, "Wha--Applejack? I need to go home!"

She brings her face very close to yours and says in a low growl, "You ain't goin' nowhere 'til I finish my massage, got it?"

Now that's a face Apple Bloom had better not be good at.

"Uh... y-yes ma'am."

She grins and presses your shoulder down until your head is on her pillow again, then she continues where she left off and nickers gently.

"Honestly, Granny was probably just gonna make y'all sleep in the guest bedroom anyhow. Doubt she'd let y'all try an' walk home in this condition... shame I can't use both hooves, though. This is gonna take ages."

You can only groan in response. She slowly moves across both shoulders, then up onto your neck. After she finishes there, you have to apologize for drooling onto her pillow. She massages the arm closest to her, then shuffles over you and sits on your right side to do the other arm. There was less room on that side of the bed, so she kinda gets squished against your side. After finishing the second arm, she twists around and begins on your lower back, squeezing fresh moans from you.

"Hey Anon?"

You grunt in response.

"Y'all weren't lyin' when you said all that stuff 'bout meat, right?"

You wrench your heavy eyelids open and turn your head to look at her, "No? 'Course not, I don't think I even could lie to you."

Her hoof stops and she leans closer to you, "Oh ya wouldn't now? How 'bout all them machine designs ya threw away?"

You close your eyes and sigh heavily, but she just chuckles and continues her massage, "Nah, don't worry 'bout it. I know yer just worried after that scare with the scythe. I'll help ya work past that... I was just in a sour mood an' didn't feel like confrontin' you 'bout it."

You moan again as she presses into a particular spot, then open your eyes again, "Well... I still feel like crap about lying for that. Lying to the element of honesty's probably some kind of pony sin, right?"

She laughs as she moves further down your spine, "Naw, 'course not! Rainbow Dash woulda been thrown in Tartarus ages ago!"

You chuckle, then say, "Well anyway, no, I wasn't lying about meat." A huge yawn interrupts you, "...It's very popular back on earth."

She pauses her massage and leans close again, "Even, uh... what ya said 'bout cows?"

"Yep. Beef is one of the most popular meats... uh, beef is cow meat."

From her expression you start to worry you might have genuinely upset her so you struggle to speak through your sleepy fog, "Should probably mention cows are dumb back on earth. Humans are the only animals that can talk and think. Not like we're eating Betsy or whatever that cow's name is. It's like eating a fish."

She seems to relax at that. She skips over your butt and starts massaging your thighs, and you're so relaxed now you're finding it hard to speak.

"Uuuugh... y'said some ponies... do eat meat, though?"

"Eyup. Dunno where they get it from, though."

"Yeh... 'specially since most animals are sentient here... vegans'd lose their shit."

She rubs your legs for another minute or two, then finally asks, "You ever, uh... like, get your own meat? Y'know, hunted?

"...Huh? Thinka dozed off... what'd y'say?"

She stops massaging and you crack an eye open to see her lean into view and give you a gentle smile, "Nevermind. Go to sleep, Anon. I'll see you in the morning."

You yawn again and mumble, "But... 'm taken' ya bed... where're you gon' sleep?"

In response, she crawls over you to the other side of the bed, turns off her lamp, and snuggles against your side, her fuzzy snout tucked between your neck and shoulder. She whispers something in your ear, but you were already asleep.