🥜

The blue mare before me hiccuped and looked a little dazed. Her mane was a little disheveled and a few strands of her mane were astray.

“Well, I hope you two are well rested,” Starlight said with a little giggle.

“Yes. I’m still tired, but I won’t be able to sleep until later anyway,” I said before turning to Lilyheart. “Are you ready to go see Fluttershy?”

Her eyes immediately brightened a little. So predictable.

“It’s kind of a little late to do that. It would be dark by the time you got there, and you don’t want to be anywhere near the Everfree Forest at night,” Starlight cut in.

“Really?” I coughed. I looked over to the nearest window and trotted to it. The orange light of dusk came shining through. Outside, the world was tinted with the reddish color, painting the trees and grassy blades various shades of yellow and brown. The thatched pony houses seemed like pale yellow cubes. Artistically, there was something beautiful about the picture before me. The perspective, the way how the light shone and the angles of the shadows. I could make out a few ponies, like little colorful beetles going about their work.

Hiccup. “I guess we’ll go tomorrow?” asked Lilyheart.

“Sure…” I grumbled. No grumbling. Be happy. It’s just one more night. One more night of being–I looked down at… my hooves–a pony. One more night of being a pony.

Then they're yours!

Pete? Uncle Pete? Why was he a dragon? Of course, God could do anything He wanted. But why was my uncle a dragon, and I a pony?!

“Do you two know the way from here?” Starlight asked.

“Well,” began Lilyheart. “I think we can figure it out. We can ask for help from anypony on the way, and we know the basic layout. I mean, it’s as simple as staying on-hiccup-that side of town, walking along the edge of the forest until we get to the road. Or, I guess we can just take the pathway that-hiccup-leads away from the town towards the forest, can’t we?” There was something about how she pointed her hoof…

“Uh, Lilyheart, the Everfree Forest is the other way,” said Starlight.

“Huh? Wait-hiccup-how? But I…what?” Lilyheart stuttered.

“We’ll need help getting there, please,” I said.

“But…”

“No problem,” said Starlight with a smile. “Sunset didn’t get a chance to go to the Apple Farm, so she can lead you there in the morning.”

“I…”

“Thank you, Starlight,” I said. “Do you mind if we stay the night one more night? If that’s not too much trouble? If there’s any work around the castle we can do, I’d be happy to help.”

Hiccup.

“What? Oh, don’t worry about it,” said Starlight while waving a hoof nonchalantly. “I’m happy to help. You don’t have to do anything.”

“Thank you,” I said.

Lilyheart was now hopping like Pinkie Pie.

“Do you need something?” I asked.

She continued to jump quietly for five hops before a hiccup overcame her and apparently interrupted her flow. “I was… I’m hungry,” she answered with a shy smile.

“Already?” I asked.

“Well, it is just about dinner time. Plus, magic surges like that can certainly use a lot of energy. Makes a unicorn hungry,” explained Starlight.

“But that was before,” I said, confused. “Unless…”

Lilyheart looked at me with a subtle, but embarrassed smile.

***

I struggled my way into a chair around the cutie mark table. Stupid walking on all fours. I did not like my face protruding forward and being my first line of defense from approaching objects.

“Wait! Sit in Applejack’s chair!” Lilyheart suddenly cried.

“Why?” I said with a frown. I already had my forelegs on the chair.

“Because it’s Applejack!” Lilyheart insisted. “You-hiccup-love Applejack!”

An image of the orange mare popped into my mind. Smiling… at me, with a straw of hay sticking out of her mouth. She’d then open her mouth and say something simultaneously practical and ironic.

It made me feel sick. I shuttered. AJ is the last pony I want to see. On a screen, cartoon ponies were great. But real cartoon ponies? Real Applejack? No thank you. I lifted my body up with my forelegs and leapt with my hind ones, shooting successfully into the chair. It actually felt… okay, to have the soles of my hooves land solidly on the surface of the chair. One shift around… and sit. I hadn’t even looked at the cutie mark on the chair.

But when I looked over to Lilyheart, I immediately took note of the three pink butterflies above her head. Of course. Oh no, did I just roll my eyes? Lilyheart’s expression was now… smug. Almost catlike.

“I appreciate Applejack. That’s true,” I said. “But I don’t need to sit in her chair. I don’t care whose chair I sit in so long as I’m not taking somepony’s spot.”

“Hey, you just said it without-hiccup-stuttering!” Lilyheart cheered.

“Said what?”

“Somep-p-p-p-pony!” she said in singsong.

“Ugh. Thanks for telling me.”

“You’re wel-hiccup-come!” Lilyheart answered with a smile.

Every hiccup feels like an intentional insult. And you have never been so loud. Or so cheery. Can you please be depressed and non-talkative again?

Guilt immediately gripped my heart. How could I think that? God forgive me. How could I think that?

Sunset walked in with an absolutely exhausted look on her face. She took a seat next to Lilyheart and groaned before plopping her head onto the table.

Lilyheart and I exchanged looks.

“Are you okay?” I asked.

Hiccup.

“Rarity has me stitching dresses for Smolder. But she’s so… difficult to figure out how to please. It can’t be cute, it can’t be cool. Not too flashy, not too bland… ugh!” Sunset lifted her head, dropped it back on the table, and lifted it again. “Don’t get me wrong. I like Smolder and I’m happy to learn from Rarity. But, it’s just been exhausting.” Head back on table. And up. “Oh, Smolder’s a student at the School of Friendship.”

Who?

“We know,” said Lilyheart.

“What? I don’t!” I exclaimed. “Oh. Is she from season nine or something?”

“Recurring character from season eight on,” explained Lilyheart. “Best dragon! Well, maybe besides Cassie.”

“Who’s Cassie?” asked Sunset.

“I hope you don’t let Spike hear that,” called Starlight’s voice as she entered. “Or any dragon for that matter. It’s a little odd to say one particular dragon is best.” My eyes drifted to the plates of food Starlight was “carrying.” It looked like fries. Until she placed them on the table.

Hay. She just put five plates of straw on the table. Yellow, prickly, straw. And one was in front of me. Little cups of some unknown kinds of sauces followed.

“Fresh cut hay!” cheered Starlight. “I wasn’t sure what sort of dressing everypony wanted, so I tried to cover the basics. There’s honey, hot honey, carrot, and of course apple! And this time I have straws for drinks.”

“Isn’t that straw?” I asked. It’s clearly straw.

Starlight looked at me inquisitively for a moment, before answering. “No. Straw is prepared differently so it can be used in building material. This? This is freshly cut hay, perfect for eating.”

If it’s freshly cut, why is it yellow? “What’s mixed in the sauces?” I asked. Their consistency was thicker than it ought to be, more like ketchup or barbecue sauce.

Hiccup.

“Well, I bought those from the store,” Starlight answered. “But probably eggs, water, and alfalfa.”

I resisted the urge to facehoof. Looking at the pile of straw in front of me, my stomach felt nauseous.

“I had a hard time adjusting to the food, too,” said Sunset. “But, it’s actually pretty good.”

“Oh, I forgot about that,” said Starlight. “Sorry if I surprised you with this. I guess not a lot of creatures eat hay besides ponies. Yona and Silverstream don’t seem to mind it, but Smolder won’t touch it.”

My gaze drifted to Lilyheart. She gave me a shrug and took a nibble of the straw.

Am I going insane? You’re the pickiest eater I know and you’re going to eat straw just like that?! This isn’t normal!

But to my surprise, Lilyheart’s eyes went wide. “Woah,” she said. “Ro–Brother, it’s good. Like, really, really good.” She took another bite, this slurping up a few pieces as if like spaghetti. She chewed, and for the first time I noticed that when she chewed, her cheeks bulged out, just like they did on the show. Of course they did. Lilyheart swallowed, and her expression became joyous. “It's like… savory. But still sweet and even just a bit of sourness to it! And the texture, it’s like it has this satisfying crunch but it’s still all chewy! Oishii!” I had no idea what the last word was, but Lily had stars in her eyes.

No. This is too much. I don’t care how happy you are. I’m losing you. This world is affecting us! My lips pursed together. The hooves before me were shaking. I wasn’t certain if I was going to cry, scream, or vomit.

“Oh, ponyfeathers!” Lilyheart said suddenly. She clasped her hooves together, closed her eyes, and lowered her head. I watched as her lips silently moved, and traced each word with my eyes. Each word that I knew by heart.

I hadn’t realized the world was spinning before, but now it seemed to still. Suddenly, I had solid ground. Suddenly, my terror was laid to rest.

Lilyheart then rose her right hoof, bringing it to her forehead. Her eyes opened slightly, in surprise at making contact with her horn, then she brought the hoof now to her belly, and then to one shoulder before the other.

“Lilyheart, what are you doing?” asked Sunset.

No religion in Equestria Girls world, either?

“Oh, just praying. I try to always do it before I eat. I mean, it’s good to thank you for the food, but it’s also good to thank… our Creator, too. Or omniscient and omnipotent Great Spirit, if you prefer. Honestly, I’m missing a lot of other omnis. But, normally we just call Him God.”

“Huh. Okay. We don’t really worship divinities much in Equestria anymore. But, we do embrace the magic of harmony, so I guess that’s a bit like the same thing,” Starlight said while taking a bite of straw.

“The rules here work differ-hiccup-differently,” said Lilyheart. “M-R… my brother and I used to talk about that. In some ways they’re the same. We don’t have anything like windingos appearing if we start fighting and arguing all the time… but our culture and societies break up anyway if we do that. It’s weird how similar it is.”

There were so many things I wanted to add to the conversation. To start with asking why Lilyheart had to complicate things by not just saying she was praying to God instead of going on a theological ramble. But, instead, I took another look at the plate of straw before me. I closed my eyes and prayed.

Bless us, oh Lord, for these gifts which we are about to receive from Your goodness through Jesus Our Lord. And may the souls of the faithfully departed rest in eternal peace.

I followed this by crossing myself, and reached down to take a small bite. It was dry. Crisp. But the moment my teeth broke a straw in half, an explosion of flavor hit my tongue. Steak. It reminded me of steak. But not quite. There was that twinge of sourness Lilyheart mentioned, but somehow it was sweet at the same time.

“It’s… good,” I said once I had swallowed. “Although, it’s really dry.” I quickly took a slip of water.

“That’s one reason ponies normally eat them with a little bit of sauce,” explained Starlight. “Just not too much or you drown out the hay flavor.”

Is this what hay tastes like for horses on our world? “May I have some apple with this then?” I asked.

“Ooh, and some honey for me, please!” said Lilyheart. “Actually, maybe a little bit of the hot honey. Just to try it.”

“Since when do you like spicy things?” I asked.

“I don’t,” she answered. “But, if it’s really, really mild it might be really good with this. Like, barbecue sauce?”

Turns out, it was much too spicy for her, and Lilyheart stuck with the regular honey. We spent the rest of the evening talking about various events that had transpired since Twilight’s coronation.

“The School of Friendship has grown pretty quickly,” explained Starlight. “We have a few more hippogriffs and changelings. And even our first buffalo and kirin. Plus, our first human.” She winked towards Sunset with the last statement.

“Not really anymore,” Sunset chided back, waving her hooves.

“But you’re still a bit of a celebrity among the other students. And you have a perspective that no other creature does. We’d be more than happy to have you two join also, if you end up sticking around, that is. I know it can be scary, but I promise you’ll fit right in. There’s room for every creature in the School of Friendship.”

“Thank you,” I answered. “But, I’ve had my fill of school for a while.”

“Plus, no offense, but I’m not sure how much we can learn,” Lilyheart added. “I mean, we know almost every friendship lesson Twilight and her friends ever considered significant enough to report to Celestia or teach to other ponies.”

“That’s okay,” said Starlight. “Although, just remember that there’s always more to learn about friendship. Twilight would be the first to admit it.”

“How have things gone, with Twilight in charge?” I asked.

“It’s been great! Well, I mean, she’s still getting the hang of things. But most ponies understand that,” answered Starlight

“Weren’t you just saying there was another gaffe?” asked Sunset.

“Oh, that. Well that wasn’t her fault! Or Spike’s! They didn’t know the audience could hear…”

“What happened?” I asked.

Sunset giggled. “Spike scandalized a crowd of Canterlot elites.”

“Somepony asked her…” Starlight made finger quotes. Hoof quotes? “ ‘Will the sun continue to have apricity during winter?’ Then Twilight answered, ‘Of course! The sun will maintain its current quality of apricity as expected during the length of the brumal period.’ ”

“And then Spike muttered ‘Whatever in apricity means,’ ” continued Sunset with a giggle.

“All in front of the Canterlot Society of Astronomic Records and Investigations,” finished Starlight.

“I don’t get it,” I said, to which Sunset and Lilyheart both exploded into a fit of giggles.

“To us,” explained Starlight, eyeing the two other unicorns, “It might not be a big deal, but to those Canterlot types, Spike might as well have just asked why it even mattered if the sun came up at all.”

“They’re just real sticklers,” cut in Sunset. “They aren’t really worth worrying about. They’ll get wound up about anything.”

“But imagine how it feels to be Twilight, or even Spike! That society was founded by Starswirl the Bearded. It still holds a lot of respect with ponies. And particularly unicorns.”

While the conversation continued, I noticed Lilyheart fell quiet. Her brows furrowed in thought. It was remarkable how, even though her face looked nothing like Andrew, I could still see a sliver of his personality in Lilyheart’s expression.

It was only after the meal was done, and both Starlight and Sunset stepped away to take care of the dishes that I risked speaking up.

“Lilyheart,” I forced out the syllables. “What is it? You’re thinking about something.”

Her eyes widened a moment in surprise before she stumbled through an answer. “I… well, I was just thinking… Equestria follows its own rules, doesn’t it? Like, physics itself is different here. We used to talk about how different morals can come out of the show… ones that even the show didn’t mean to teach. Lessons and truths which ran deeper. Something universally h-h–h-h-horse. Ugh. You know what I mean.”

“Yeah,” I said. “Is that all?”

“If we’re under Equestrian rules… I wonder if that means… well, just that: are we under Equestrian rules, now? How does that affect us? Obviously we can do all these cartoon things. But, what about psychologically and spiritually?”

“You think being here changed our souls?” Normally, that wasn’t something I would bother considering. But, right now I was a horse talking to another horse.

“I wouldn’t say that. More like… we have to follow the rules if y–we want to go home.”

“I don’t follow.”

“We might have to learn a friendship lesson. Or something,” said Lilyheart. “I don’t know. It’s hard to wrap my brain around. But, it’s just that, my gut tells me something deeper is at play here. Something more than just cartoons, sugar, and spice.”

“Chemical X?” I asked.

Lilyheart giggled. “I forgot you watched that.”

“It wasn’t me. My brother was the one who liked it!”

Before she could respond, Starlight re-entered the room with a scroll.

“Lilyheart!” she said, “I have a spell that I think you’ll be happy to hear about. It’s a magical dampening spell. It should prevent any more magical surges. And it will wear off after a few hours, but will still be enough to keep you safe through the night. And Twilight’s books.”

I bid the unicorns goodnight and headed to bed before the others. If I didn’t fall asleep now, I likely wouldn’t for half the night. But Lilyheart’s words stuck with me. It was Andrew. That was the Andrew I knew. Thoughtful and cautious, meditating on concepts that never would have occurred to me otherwise. Maybe he was right; everything was fine, and he would be fine. Maybe I was never in danger of losing him after all.

Author's Note

There is so much I can talk about for this chapter. First of all, writing so much about food led to a lot of research as to what ponies eat, both on the show and in real life. This led in turn to the realization that on the show, ponies almost exclusively eat cupcakes. Sure, there’s other stuff, like hay burgers and carrot dogs, but about 90% percent of the pony’s diet consists of sugary sweets… which somehow is too unrealistic for me. I’m fine with ponies being pancaked or twisting their heads 360 degrees and still being fine, but I draw the line at them eating cupcakes for dinner.

Additionally I learned that apparently when real horses choke on food, they can still breathe. No such protection for the cartoon variety.

Secondly, I have to draw a comparison between Robin’s reaction to hay and HB's from JetBlack1980’s My Little Heartbreak. Previously, I thought that HB ought to sort of get over it; if it tastes sweet, why have an issue? But, once I finally introduced my characters to hay, it occurred to me that I had severely underestimated the psychological effect eating something like hay could have if you already have a complex about being an equine. Robin was lucky enough to have a crutch to help him accept it in this instance.

Rather than continue rambling about random facts I learned about equine diet (like the difference between straw and hay) I’ll cut to the chase and give thanks to my wonderful editors, Ashel and Rainy!