She likes to be smacked around
Author's Note
I’ve hit a lull in my bigger projects so I’m back to twisting beloved characters with my dark machinations.
I ask no forgiveness, for I know I do not deserve it.
Look at this fish I caught, do you reckon my dad will be proud of it? 🎣
She likes to be smacked around
“SHOW ME YOUR BALLS, BITCH!!”
Anon spits out his coffee with a stuttering hack. “Wh-what?!” His lungs kick at his chest as some liquid ended up not only there, but also in his nose.
“You’re NUTS, stud, I’M tryna catch a GANDER!”
“What the heck is wrong with you Fluttershy?!” Anon screeches, as a familiar yellow Pegasus has now leaped across his kitchen table with a wail akin to that of a banshee, causing his news paper to be torn from his hands, his personal space violently invaded.
“Anonny my hubby wubby, I’ve been huffin’ and puffin’ for a whiff of those DANGLING BABY MAKERS since the moment you GOT here! And I’m SICK of waiting for you to pick up my advances!” Her nose presses hard into the horrified human’s own, her eyes a particular type of wild. “I NEED HUMAN DICK PRONTO OMANO!”
“T-t-this isn’t you Fluttershy!”
“Wrong! ~This is who I am FOR REAL nigga. A legitimate SEX OFFENDER, an absolute ANIMAL when it comes to humans and their fat cervix kissing dicks-“
“I’m not even like four inches hard-“
“I’m a Anon cock CONSIOUR. Lyra can’t even hope to compare to my lust for men, I’ve kept it locked deep inside the outermost edge of my soul so even Celestia would not see it. But I crave that godly human stamina!”
“My cardio is like seriously below average-“
“I need you Anon, SO BAD. So UNBELIEVABLY unfathomably unnaturally in my pants-“
“You don’t even wear clothes?!”
“Stop killing the fantasy please Anonymous this means so much to me. I’ve literally dreamed of nothing else for the past two years three months eleven days seven hours forty five minutes and nine-point-eight seconds.”
“Uhh… ‘M sorry?” His confused state was too deep to offer a genuine apology.
“You can make it up to me by having bed breaking mind bending earth shattering SEX with me. Multiple times in a row.”
Anon feels the sweat flooding down his face and desperately tries to act coy. “I’d be too sleepy after one, uh, sex! Ahaha.” He gulps. Speaking to Fluttershy within any pretext that lended to even a hint of sexual insinuation felt like having that one Sunday school teacher try to grope you like damn miss Stevens’s how do you even know what that is?!
“You’re staring, Anon. Do you… hmph… see something you like?” Fluttershy had dropped to a coy, and husky tone. “You look so beautiful - I could kiss you.” She starts to lean forward, lips pursing so hard they’ll already making a smooching sound.
The humans inner dialogue goes as thus - Oh shit ah, fuck uh, THINK FAST MAN!
“Hiyah!” Anon throws an absolute fucking atomizer of a right hook straight into the little pony’s jaw. Her head snaps backwards from the massive catatonic inducing thunder smash with a hearty thud. The results? Catastrophic. As the poor Pegasus is launched across the room and smashes into the floor, rolling several feet before coming to a stop unmoving. He gasps at what he’d done. “Fluttershy!” Lanky legs take hun across the room in moments. She’s still unmoving by the time he’s kneeled over her. “You good?” He almost facepalmed, he always asks stupid questions when he was nervous.
Fluttershy groans, closed eyes feathering open to peer up at Anon with a yearning sparkle in the whites of her eye. “I was hit by a train: a train called love.” Her attempt at a seductive whisper is a bit creaky this time around, as she seems to be very much in pain. “So you like to be rough huh?”
“F-Fluttershy your face is swelling.” It was true, her jaw was beginning to puff up in a painful looking red.
“You make it all worth it, Nonny.” She sniffles.
“I need to get you to the hospital…” He mutters.
Fluttershy giggles. “A colt who’ll smack me around and play doctor? you’re a dream come truuueeee.” Her voice warbles in a way that would’ve been cute if she didn’t suddenly start slurring around her words.
“This is crazy, you’re crazy…” Anon mutters.
“We can be crazy tooooogetheeeer.” She giggles.
“I’m… picking you up to take you the hospital, okay Fluttershy?”
“Weeeee!” Was her response once Anon picked her up and huddled her close to his chest. “You smell sooooo good…”
God he was so in trouble.
Anon stood glumly as Twilight shrieked at him. “You punched her?!”
“…yes.” He gulped. God he was so in trouble.
“Why?!”
“She, uh… came on to me a little too hard, got too close and I reacted… poorly.”
“Oh, fair enough I guess.” Twilight hums.
Anon is just happy she didn’t smite him on the spot. “…is she gonna be okay?”
“I’m not a doctor, Anon. But if I were to make a honest guess I’d say she’ll be fine. Probably. Maybe. Okay she looked a little rough Anon, I can’t lie to you. Her face was like a balloon, except instead of being filled with oxygen it was human knuckles.” She snickers to herself. “Gosh. That was funny.”
“I’m going to prison.”
Twilight waves a hoof dismissively. “Oh it was an accident and she, by your account, was making unsolicited advances… as hard as that is to believe. And I was joking, Anon. Pegasi are especially durable compared to other ponies. I’m sure some ice will mostly fix the problem.”
Suddenly the doctor burst through the waiting room doors. “She’s dead. That punch to her jaw caused all the blood vessels inside her brain to all erupt simultaneously.”
Waterphone. Royalty free suspense stab #2.
Anon’s mouth gaped. Thankfully only his mouth.
“Wah, how is this possible?” Twilight could feel a tidal wave of emotions rush forward to the front of her face; tears brimmed in her eyes. “My… my friend is dead?”
“Dead as Tartarus.” The doctor sighs. “I’m… incredibly sorry for your loss, but… the impact to her brain case was indeed devastating. Some might even say cataclysmic. She died of total chromosome collapse.”
“Is… is that a thing?”
“Ah, tomato potato.” The doctor shrugs says. “It is now.”
“But doc, she was alive by the time I brought her here, how could all of her blood vessels erupt simultaneously if what you’re saying is true?”
“Simple, her love for you was so great she managed to hold on just long enough to die in the hospital bed.”
Twilight’s sobbing grew louder.
“I killed Fluttershy.” Anon mumbled.
“Oh yes… about that, Anonymous… you are definitely going to prison.”
“This is terrible news.”
“Oh I’m sure you’ll be out soon enough if you’re genuinely sorry. This country seems to be full of sympathetic villains and forgiving matriarchs - with how many of them are walking around nowadays.”
“Well that’s better news.”
“Then again she was an element of harmony, so you’ve definitely just destabilized the entire country to an absolutely absurd degree.”
“Even worse news.”
“Yes… I’m gonna have to call the guards.”
“Damn.“
Guess he should’ve let Fluttershy look at his balls.
