Darkest Equestria

"This is so stupid." Rainbow Dash's hushed voice came from a nearby bush.

"Quiet." Applejack hissed. "Let's just try it out."

Pinkie had heard the voices, and it wasn't really helping her confidence. In the dark embrace of the Everfree, there was only her, a lantern, and Trixie in view. Other than the leaf mulch and winding roots of the nearby trees. The smell of rot was as strong as ever, and the warm air was sickly sweet.

Trixie had her hooves crossed as she stared down at Pinkie.

"So... what should we do?" Pinkie asked. "Do I start screaming, or do you?"

"Trixie does not know exactly. How does one put on a convincing scream?"

"I don't know." Pinkie said. "I'm just going to go for it."

It was getting a lot more awkward than she thought it would be. So, she just started screaming. Pinkie screamed as loud as she could into the forest. It felt wrong, like she was defying a key rule of the Everfree, but she kept screaming. She screamed until her throat felt raw.

"How was that?" Pinkie rasped.

"Disturbing." Trixie said. "You know, Trixie wanted to remind you that she is not jealous in any way."

"Really?" Pinkie asked. "That's good. I was worried you might be jealous."

"Well, Trixie is not." Trixie said. "As she said. But I thought it would be best to make our friendship official. Be grateful that Trixie is accepting you as her friend."

"You want to be friends?" Pinkie smiled. It was getting all too easy to make friends around here, her skills had never left her after all these years. "Well, I accept! I'll be your friend!"

"Really?" Trixie's eyes shimmered with delight. "Trixie has never had a friend before."

"You haven't?"

"Trixie has had many friends, just none that said they would be her friend." Trixie huffed. "Ungrateful ponies. Trixie will make sure that she remains good friends with you."

Pinkie wondered what that meant exactly if you were a friend with a pony that didn't say they were your friend. It sounded confusing, and so she tried not to think too much into it.

"Hey! Less talking, more screaming!' Rainbow loudly whispered nearby. "This was your plan, remember?"

"Oh yeah." Pinkie said. "Mind screaming Trixie?"

"Trixie has something better for this than simple screaming. A magic trick if you will." Trixie smirked and levitated her prized skull up. "As a sign of our friendship, she will perform this trick for you."

"What in Celestia's name is that?" Applejack whispered from nearby. "Looks like an abomination to all things holy."

"Can you be quiet please? Rainbow whispered.

"You weren't much better."

Pinkie Pie tried to ignore them. They weren't really sticking to the plan, were they? Hopefully they didn't mind Trixie's strange magic. Though now that she was thinking about it, maybe having a crusader in the same group as a strange possibly dark magic user wasn't the best idea. Maybe in her haste, Twilight forgot to mention this to them? Or maybe she already informed the two new ponies. That was more likely.

"Are you paying attention to Trixie, friend?" Trixie said.

"Yep! My eyes are glued to you." Pinkie said.

At that Trixie puffed up. "Then behold, Trixie's great and powerful magic!"

The eyes of the skull glowed red. Slowly the jaw opened, rattling with old bone all the way. When it opened in full, nothing seemed to happen for a moment. The air grew still.

"Is that the magic trick?" Pinkie asked. "That was pretty sweet."

Then it started. A loud, spine chilling and ear grating scream. It sounded like a pony dying in agony, yearning for the sweet release of death. It was loud, so loud that Pinkie immediately shot her hooves to her ears. She tried to cover them, but it was of no use. It reverberated through her skull like a bell, echoing through every fiber of her body.

Her ears were ringing when it was done; Trixie was trying to say something, but Pinkie couldn't even hear what she was saying.

"That was loud! Really loud! I can't hear you!" Pinkie yelled, a bubble of irritation swelling in her chest. "You could have warned me, you know!"

Trixie didn't seem bothered by the scream, puffing up and saying something she couldn't hear. Probably something along the lines of great and powerful.

Applejack came stumbling out of the bushes. She pointed at Trixie, her stance suggesting anger. The skull was the target of the pointing, and Pinkie could only guess what she was saying.

"Hey! Let's calm down everypony!" Pinkie said. "She did what we said, right?"

Applejack said something, but Pinkie Pie couldn't hear a thing. Her head was starting to hurt now, but she could feel her hearing slowly returning.

Trixie and Applejack started arguing. Trixie looked unrepentant, and Applejack's stance grew more and more aggressive with every exchange of words. She kept pointing at the skull, then stomping on the ground.

"Hey! Stop!" Pinkie Pie stepped between the two. "Can you hear me?"

The two froze, their heads snapping towards the woods.

"Oh, thank you." Pinkie Pie said. "We can't be fighting like this! Why don't we just get along and tell a few jokes?"

Applejack grabbed her scruff. Pinkie struggled against it. "Hey! What's the deal?"

Trixie followed them into a cluster of nearby bushes. Pinkie was forced down into them, having no idea what was going on. She struggled more, getting irritated, before Trixie bopped her on the head. Trixie mimicked zipping her mouth shut, and then hid inside the bushes as well.

Pinkie lay on her stomach in the rotten mulch. The ground was disgusting, and she didn't know what was going on. She decided to keep silent for now. Pinkie tried to deduce what was happening by looking at the companions next to her. They looked worried and tense. Trixie glanced at her, a glimpse of regret on her face, before it disappeared behind a proud grin.

Charades was something that Pinkie considered herself good at. The last time she had done it was years ago, and she was always the one doing the motions, but it couldn't be that hard to figure out how to read them. So, she watched, staring at Trixie.

She seemed to bask in the attention, and pointed through the bush. Pinkie followed her gaze, only to see forest. Trixie said something, but Applejack put a hoof up to her face a moment later.

It was an absolute mess of silent messages, and Pinkie was just really confused by the time they all settled down again.

Her temporary deafness slowly cleared as she laid down in the bush, and eventually she could start to hear again, though it was as if she was underwater.

There were voices coming from the woods. Rough and gruff, it was muddled but she could recognize the voices of bandits anywhere. Pinkie froze and readied her hoof blades. She tried to listen closely, but it was all water and mud. Her heart started to pound low and steady in her chest.

A moment passed with all the world muddled. And then, Applejack exploded out of the bushes, sword held in her mouth. With a muffled cry of, "For Celestia!" She ran forward.

Pinkie Pie stood up, blood surging through her body. There were definitely enemies, right? She stood up out of the bushes, and immediately saw them.

Four bandits, armed with swords and daggers, stood there with expressions of shock. One in the back wielded a crossbow, which he held in his hooves. The unicorn aimed the crossbow and fired. The shot hit Applejack right in the side of the breastplate, but the bolt was deflected to the side, spinning off into the undergrowth. Panickily, the unicorn reloaded, weak magic tugging back the string as he loaded another bolt.

Seeing the bandits, Pinkie Pie snarled, a shot of rage running through her. She readied her hoof blades and dashed forward.

A steel feather went flying past her head, which sunk deep into a bandit's chest. He stumbled back, but still raised his blade even as blood welled.

Pinkie glanced, only to see Rainbow Dash, standing with her metal wings extended. She flicked them back into place at her side and withdrew a wicked dagger. Her eyes were hard, narrowed, and nearly emotionless. She flicked her wing forward again, and a shower of metal darts erupted from them, skewering a bandit.

She shook her head, amazed at what she saw. Now was not the time to watch however. She fell upon the wounded bandits, her scythe clashing against a steel sword. With a prance she danced away from a swipe, then jabbed forward with her dirk. It caught the bandit in the hoof, and he dropped his blade with a muddled grunt of pain.

Applejack cleaved downward with her sword, smashing into the raised guard of a bandit. They locked blades before Applejack surged forward, knocking him to the ground. A smash of the pommel over his head dazed him, and a vicious stab speared him to the mud.

A clatter of blades filled the air as screams erupted and blood flew. Pinkie danced with her blades, swiping and shearing flesh from bone.

Overhead, a dark red portal opened as if from thin air. Spectral red tentacles emerged from them, lashing down towards the bandits. They swiped, smashing the bandits over the head before retreating into the portal. Trixie chanted in the background, unintelligible murmurs that made her prized skull glow with a hellish light.

In moments, every bandit had been eviscerated by their combined assault. Pinkie stood panting, staring at the carved-up bodies. It never got easier looking at them, even if she hated the guts of the ponies they belonged to. She turned away; hooves stained by blood. Her hearing was finally returning, and she started to hear the conversations of her allies.

"What in Celestia's name was that?" Applejack pointed her sword towards Trixie, a vicious snarl etched across her face. "Dark magic?"

"Trixie practices no such thing. Apologize to her now for suggesting such a thing!" Trixie took a step back away from the enraged crusader. Her darting eyes looked for an escape.

"I don't think I will." Applejack stepped forward, blade at the ready. "Rainbow, cut off her escape."

Rainbow nodded and bent her wing. The individual metal feathers flexed, ready to fly from their sheathes.

"Wait just one moment!" Pinkie leapt forward in front of Trixie. "What do you think you're going to do?"

"End this menace before it ends us." Applejack said. "Can't you see, sugar cube? She is a witch, a dark magic practitioner."

"She has been nothing but helpful." Pinkie Pie said. "We just took out those bandits no problem! Why are you trying to hurt her?"

They glared at each other. Pinkie held her gaze, unyielding. She may have been an old friend, but that didn't mean she could just throw around accusations against ponies. And even if Trixie was a dark magic user, she had done nothing but good so far.

"So, you're not moving?" Applejack raised her blade.

"Nope. Trixie hasn't done anything wrong, and so I'm not moving." Pinkie sat on her flank and crossed her hooves.

"Then I'll make you move." Applejack stepped forward; her eyes filled with a zealous rage.

Pinkie had heard of the fanatical fervor of the crusaders but seeing it first hoof was a little unnerving. It really looked like Applejack was going to hurt her. She stifled the fear she felt. There had to be something she could do. She got an idea then, a wicked idea, but wasn't that the usual kind of idea nowadays?

"Coward." Pinkie said. "You're a real coward. Is that a joke? The crusader is the most scared out of all of us?"

"What?" Applejack stopped. "I'm no coward. If any pony is a coward here, it's you."

"You're a coward, admit it. You can't even tolerate some pony who might be dangerous in the group." Pinkie giggled, covering her mouth with a hoof. "You're a real jokester Applejack, in fact, I think you have me beat as the jester!"

Applejack didn't say anything to that, a look of disbelief on her face. "What?"

Trixie giggled beneath her breath behind her.

"So much for Celestia's protection, am I right?" Pinkie said. "Who would have thought that a crusader couldn't trust in her goddess to protect her? I mean, even I have more faith than-"

"Enough!" Applejack snapped. "You're a real wicked pony now, aren't you Pinkie?"

"What do you mean? I'm just as funny as I usually am, aren't I?" Pinkie's heart was thrumming in her chest. "I'm the butt of all the jokes, can't you be on the end of one for once? Remember the old days?"

"Fine. Fine!" Applejack said. "You're right, this place just has my nerves all tangled. I'll give Trixie a chance, but one wrong move..."

"Oh, you know I don't mean it." Pinkie Pie said. "We are good friends, aren't we?"

Applejack didn't say anything and looked down at the sigil of the sun on her armor. "I'm faithful. Just know that I have been battle hardened in my faith, more than any other pony here."

"I gotcha! It was just a joke, Applejack." Pinkie could feel guilt welling in her chest. "No hard feelings, right?"

"Let's just get back to the mission." Rainbow Dash looked at Pinkie, her face pulled into a frown.

One of the bodies on the ground twitched. A hoof moved, which went unnoticed to every pony besides Pinkie. She had kept an eye on them and was happy for the distraction. "Oh look, one of the bandits is still alive!"

As eyes turned towards the bodies, Pinkie released a shaky breath.

It wasn't in her blood to be so mean. But she couldn't think of anything else to stop Applejack from attacking. Maybe this place had changed her, just like every pony else. Meaner, more wicked. No. As long as she could keep laughing and lifting others, then maybe even this place couldn't change her. She would have to apologize to Applejack later.

Pinkie Pie was drawn out of her thoughts as the group gathered around the living bandit. He truly was a wretched thing, lying on the ground in his own blood, a metal feather sticking out of his chest.

"I'll finish this quickly." Rainbow Dash flipped her dagger and pressed it against the bandit's throat.

"Wait! Wait!" The bandit said, clutching his wound. "I can tell you things, if you let me live, I'll tell you things."

"Kill him, let's be done with this." Applejack said.

"Wait!" Pinkie Pie ran forward. "Wait just one second!"

"What is it now?" Rainbow said.

"Let's hear him out." Pinkie looked at the bleeding wound on the bandit's chest. He was suffering no doubt and wouldn't survive in the forest alone. There was a small twinge in her gut that told her to extend his suffering, but she wouldn't give into the urge. "Speak, wretched bandit. Tell us what you know."

"And you will let me live?" The bandit coughed into his hoof, completely at the mercy of the ponies around him. "Dammit I'm bleeding..."

"We will see about that!" Pinkie said. "Now, cough it all up."

"I'm being interrogated by a cloud of cotton candy." The bandit growled. "I'm dying and being interrogated by a cloud of cotton candy."

"Well, are you going to cough that fluff up, or not?" Pinkie played with the edge of her bloodstained scythe.

The bandits eyes the edge of the scythe, looked up to the murderous ponies surrounding him, and sighed. "Yeah. What do you want to know?"

"Where is your base?" Pinkie asked.

"How am I supposed to describe that?" The bandit gestured to the woods around him, then winced at the wound. "It's impossible."

"This is a waste of time." Applejack said. "Let's just kill him and be over with it."

"Wait! I got more." The bandit said.

"I'm listening."

"We uhh..." The bandit's eyes darted between all the faces staring down at him. "We got... a cannon!"

"A cannon?" Pinkie asked. She could feel her heart drop.

It had been quite some time since she had seen her party cannon. She had stored it away underground ever since the day the town burned, just looking at it sent shivers down her spine. Because that day the bandits had used something like her party cannon on the town. A massive cannon, not shooting streamers, but metal. And in its wake, hell had followed.

"Yes. A cannon." The bandit winced. "We call it... the pounder."

"Trixie believes this is a waste of time. Who calls a cannon a pounder?"

"Hear me out, that's what it's called. It's the twelve pounder." The bandit said. "And if you let me live, I'll show you to it. Promise."

"Pinkie promise?"

"The hell is that?"

Pinkie Pie hadn't done this in a long time, so the words almost didn't come to mind. She thought of happier times, and despite interrogating a bandit while soaked in blood, it brought a smile to her face. If only... if only those times could come back. That was why she was doing this though, wasn't it? To get that back. Those happy times, those good times. When the sun shone and laughter filled the streets.

"It goes like this." Pinkie shook her head. Enough thoughts for now. "Cross my heart, hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye!"

She crossed her heart with her hoof, mimicked flying, then stuck a hoof in her eye. It didn't hurt of course. The whole action was like experiencing a piece of the past directly.

The bandit just stared in disbelief. "What?"

"I have to agree on that." Rainbow Dash said. "What was that?"

"Trixie would also like to know the purpose behind such a chain of events."

"Yeah. Can't say I wouldn't like to know as well." Applejack said. "Seems a bit out of place if you ask me."

Pinkie Pie rolled her eyes. "Don't you two remember? It's my super special promise. No pony can break it without me knowing."

"They can't? Why?" Rainbow asked. "I mean, I remember it, kind of, but I don't remember anything about that."

"Just trust me." Pinkie said. "Now, are we doing this or not?"

"He could lead us directly into a trap, it's too dangerous." Applejack said.

"We could take out an important piece of equipment." Rainbow said. "Without something to rally behind, it could damage them."

Talking started between the group members. They discussed while Pinkie Pie watched the bandit. She wanted to take out this cannon if possible, but the thought of facing it made her grimace. Even the thought of looking at the cannon made her think back to that day Ponyville was attacked. If they were the same cannons then it could prove deadly if a shot got off. Those shots... they blew houses to bits with ease. And ponies.

Then again, it would be a more than successful task if they could butcher bandits and the cannon.

"I say we do it." Rainbow said. "Screaming and waiting for more bandits to show up seems useless."

"I guess you're right. Better than screaming at the void." Applejack sighed. "But if he tries to run or anything, I'll split him in half."

"So, we are doing it?" Pinkie asked. Equal parts dread and joy filled her. The task would go quick and bandits would die, but to face that cannon again...

"I think so." Applejack said. "Now, bandit, do Pinkie's promise and then lead us to the cannon."

"Do I have to?" The bandit asked.

"Yep! Do it or I'll rip you into party streamers!" Pinkie Pie brandished her scythe towards him.

"Ok." The bandit gulped. "Cross my heart... hope to fly... stick a... cupcake in my eye."

Each phrase was accompanied with a grimace.

As the words were completed, Pinkie felt a shiver go down her spine. The promise was made, and her Pinkie sense was sure to tell her if it was broken. Mysterious as it was powerful, her Pinkie sense always had her back.

"All right, looks like we are good to go!" Pinkie said.

"Nothing happened." Rainbow pointed out.

"Well, nothing you can see. I can feel it." Pinkie looked down at the bandit, grinning wickedly. "Trust me, if he breaks his promise, I'll know."

At that, the bandit gulped.

"I guess we are just trusting this then." Rainbow shrugged. "Good enough for me. Just don't expect this bandit not to run."

"Start walking, infidel." Applejack said. "Show us where this cannon is."

The bandit hobbled to his hooves, and his weapons were left on the ground. A rough shove from Applejack had him almost tumbling onto the ground again, but he managed to stay up. "Wait, let me orient myself."

"Make it quick." Applejack snarled.

Pinkie didn't realize that Applejack had such a mean streak. Maybe it was just against those she deemed enemies, but it was a little unnerving to watch. At least it was against a bandit, that she could get behind.

She watched the bandit's every move. If only he would slip up a little she could end him right then and there. Yet she had to be patient for the good of the mission, there would be more prey yet.

Prey? What was she even thinking anymore?

"Alright. I think it's this way." The bandit started to walk, then gasped. "Damn, my wounds... spare a bandage, will you?"

"Walk." Applejack commanded.

The bandit grumbled but started walking. He led them off the path, and into the Everfree. Out there, it would be harder to navigate. His steps were slow and jerky, but the presence of a crusader behind him forced him to keep his pace up.

"Trixie is unsure if this is a good idea. We could get lost in the forest." Trixie said.

"This is the quest. Kill as many bandits as possible." Applejack said. "Four is surely not enough to keep the roads clear."

"Is there any way we can find our way back?" Pinkie asked. "I've been in here alone before, and it gets confusing quickly. Like apple bobbing but there's no apples."

"Don't worry, I can lead us back." Rainbow looked down at the mud. "I traveled these lands by sky years ago, I can remember their lay."

Pinkie wasn't sure how that was possible, but then again, she wasn't a Pegasus. She wondered what it would feel like, to fly for all your life then suddenly lose the ability to do so. Most Pegasus could only get their hooves off the ground now without the magic to fuel their wings. Her gaze went to Rainbow's cutie mark, a mark signifying her skill at flight. To lose one's purpose... what would that mean? Pinkie could barely imagine a life without laughter in it, her purpose in this world.

"I know Rainbow and she can find the way back." Applejack said. "Surer than a hound."

"Well then what are we waiting for?" Pinkie asked. "Let's go!"

They followed the bandit, who was bleeding like a faucet from his chest. They would probably have to give him something in order to keep him alive. Pinkie wasn't a nurse, but even she knew that this wasn't sustainable. There was no way she was bandaging up a bandit though.

For now they walked. The forest closed in around them, uncharted ground paving the way ahead. Pinkie closed her eyes for a moment, listening to the corrupted sounds of the forest. It never got easier being in here, unless one dulled themselves to sensation. There was just something not right about it, a constant need to get away filled her. But she continued on nonetheless.

The cannon might be ahead, a weapon of destruction that she had witnessed first hoof. It was nothing more than a pile of metal. Bolts and plates formed into a machine. The real horrors were the ponies who used it.

But Pinkie couldn't help but feel the slightest shake in her hooves, and a churning in her gut. Fear was common in her, but she was able to ignore it for the most part.

She was strong enough to face anything, as long as she could keep her spirits up. The problem was, keeping up the spirits of others up as well.

The forest only got darker. Everything seemed alright in the group, but Pinkie could feel a certain tension in the air between them even now. Trixie, and Applejack, and even herself. Applejack sent glares in her direction.

There had to be something she could do to mend this relationship because when lives were on the line, there could be no hesitation to act. The slightest ire or fear could cause a pony to pause, to think, to consider letting another pony suffer.

She remembered that day in Ponyville when the bandits attacked. Pinkie had a chance to save them, save any pony, but all she did was hide. She didn't act, she did nothing. Because wasn't her life more important than others?

Something had to be done, or else some pony was going to die. It had happened before, and history was always doomed to repeat itself...

Disharmony could not be allowed to exist. The preservation of joy and laughter was paramount at any cost. And Pinkie would do whatever she could to uphold it.

That one was a Pinkie promise.