Wubs And Explosions

Trixie stumbled over a row of dancing pickles as she madly fled from the Pincushion Man. She looked over her shoulder to see the metal creature in hot pursuit, his wicked laugh resounding all over the skewed town. Somehow he managed to keep up despite the numerous distractions and obstacles that dogged Trixie’s path. The mare turned ahead with fearful eyes, knowing that sooner or later, he was going to catch her. She let out a squeak as a pin whizzed past her head, nearly embedding itself in her horn. Another followed, almost piercing her ear. The azure magician soon found herself dodging pins left and right, jumping, tumbling, and ducking in order to avoid being skewered.

“Help!” she cried as she leapt over a beetle the size of a tortoise, “Trixie requires assistance! Help!” Her only reply was the hideous laughter of the Pincushion Man, who continued to throw pins at the terrified mare. Balloons left and right of the unicorn burst as the projectiles missed their azure target. They only served to further frighten the unicorn, who involuntarily imagined herself being popped the moment one of the pins touched her. The thought of a pony popping like a balloon was rather ridiculous, but given the amount of ridiculousness Trixie had seen today, it didn’t seem too farfetched.

The magician suddenly slipped on a puddle of liquid soap and went sliding forward into a pile of dinner rolls. She quickly began struggling to get out, batting dozens of baked goods out of her way as she tried to pull herself free of the pile. The frantic unicorn suddenly froze as she heard the voice of the Pincushion Man.

“Now where’d she get to?” he growled angrily. Though frightened out of her mind, Trixie was sharp enough to recognize the opportunity. Rather than continue to fight her way out of the dinner rolls, she quietly sank down into the bottom of the pile, hoping the noise of her rapidly beating heart wouldn’t attract attention. She didn’t need to worry terribly so, for at that moment a louder and much more distracting noise filled the air.

Vinyl Scratch took a cheerful swig of her energy drink as she blasted a rampaging marshmallow monster with her signature ‘Bass Cannon’. The powerful sound waves struck the creature head on, and their intolerable frequencies resulted in its subsequent liquefaction. Several ponies cheered weakly from their hiding places amid the wreckage caused by the monster. Vinyl turned to address the refugees with a cool smile and a small bow.

“No need to thank me,” she said, “I’m just doing what any other pony would do if they had a Bass Cannon.” The blue-maned unicorn grabbed the oversize speaker by the handle and was about to find another out-of-control monster to annihilate when a loud, angry voice came from behind a small mountain of dinner rolls.

“Quit makin’ that racket!” it snarled.

“Hey man, if my music’s too loud, then you’re too old!” Vinyl retorted.

There was an angry bellow as the mysterious figure stepped into the unicorn’s line of view. Vinyl’s face went blank as she lowered her shades for a moment, just to confirm what she was seeing. Once she was certain, she cracked her usual crooked grin.

“Seriously?” she said, “A sewing monster? Because a marshmallow beast wasn’t whacked-out enough?” The creature’s odd face twisted into an enraged sneer.

“And what are you supposed to be?” he shot back, “A nearsighted mule?”

“Hey, don’t dis the shades,” Vinyl said as she adjusted her purple glasses, “And you’re one to talk. What’s up with your face? Your eyes are almost on top of your head.”

“Why, you little…!” the creature snarled furiously, “You’re gonna look like Swiss cheese by the time I’m through with you!” His threat was only met with laughter.

“Don’t you have to help some old biddy with her needlepoint or something?”

Her lack of seriousness only served to further irritate the creature, and he began marching toward her on his hooked feet, pulling a pin from his red cushion. The bespectacled DJ spotted the weapon and immediately turned her own to face him. He paused for a moment, shooting a questioning glare at the device. Vinyl merely smiled and slammed her hoof on the big red button.

“Taste wubs, pinhead!” she cried as the speaker fired a blast of mind shattering electronic music at the creature. The sheer force of each wub caused his body to vibrate like a strip of spring metal being shaken back and forth. Vinyl couldn’t help but chuckle as the Pincushion Man rattled and shook, all the while cursing her with his distorted voice. The DJ was about to take another sip of her drink when the air suddenly jumped with a sound like a bullet being fired. Vinyl seized up, spilling the vibrantly green liquid all over herself. Being a DJ who liked to pushing things to the limit, she knew that noise well. That malevolent electronic pop was the sound of a speaker blowing out.

In near panic, the unicorn peeked over the edge of her Bass Canon to confirm if her suspicions were true. She received quite a shock when she discovered a long, sinister pin had become embedded in the dead center of the machine’s speaker. The unicorn slid back as a loud crackling emanated from its inner-workings.

“Uh-oh…” she breathed.

“Hey Bonbon, look!” cried Lyra as she pointed a hoof at a massive explosion of blue energy a few blocks away. The earth pony sitting on the bench beside her followed her gesture to the blast, and both looked upon it in awe. This was the fifteenth explosion they had seen that morning.

“It’s a bit bigger than the last one, don't you think?" said Bonbon.

“Yup,” agreed Lyra, “In fact, I’d say it’s the biggest one we’ve seen so far.” The unicorn’s companion narrowed her eyes for a moment, and then shook her head.

“I don’t think so,” she said, “I think the biggest one was when that cart of watermelons exploded.” Lyra turned to the earth pony and raised an eyebrow.

“No way. This one’s, like, eighty feet higher.”

“True,” replied Bonbon, “But it’s not covering as wide as an area. The cart took out three buildings when it blew. This one appears to have only knocked down that stupid little peanut stand. Lrya’s eyes went wide as she heard this.

“The Nut Hut?!” she cried, “Aw man! I love the Nut Hut!”

Her lamentation of the loss of her favorite snack place was suddenly interrupted by a white unicorn who suddenly crashed down next to the bench. It wasn’t evident right away that her coat was white, as it had been blackened and grayed with soot. Neither was it obvious that her mane was blue, as it too had been discolored to a smoky gray. Lyra and Bonbon silently watched the equine groaned and shifted about, a lens falling out of her sunglasses.

“…Mosh Pit…” she coughed before passing out.

Trixie opened her eyes and uncovered her ears. She found that the explosion had cleared away her cover of dinner rolls, and they now lay strewn about the area haphazardly. The azure mare looked around, and found the area to be considerably more damaged than it had been before. She, on the other hand, had remained surprisingly unscathed. Best of all, she could see no sign of the Pincushion Man. A smile spread across her face as she slowly stood up and let out a sigh of relief.

It didn’t last long, however. Moments later her mouth dropped open, and her pupils shrank with fear. The cause of this was that she saw something emerge from a pile of broken boards. This something was tall, thin, made of metal, and very, very sharp.

“You!” came the gruff voice of the Pincushion Man as he kicked his hooked feet back and forth, freeing his legs of the wreckage. Trixie wasted no time in turning and sprinting away, the metal creature in hot pursuit.