Tempest Tossedby AugieDogChaptersCanto ICanto IICanto IIICanto IVCanto VCanto VICanto VIICanto VIIICanto IXCanto XCanto XICanto IDestruction! That's the stuff! I pull apart The air itself, my wake a hurricane. Tornadoes crash and howl within my heart. A thought begins to bubble, asks my brain, "Perhaps these vast reactions overstrip?" Dismissing such concerns, I summon rain. The skies should weep! The winds should roar and whip! Clichés should burst and tear the firmament, Exploring ways to shatter, rend, and rip! For ways are out there, ways to circumvent The laws of nature—all my life declares That statement true—to break or leave them bent. My sonic rainboom blisters space to ash. They'll rue the day they messed with Rainbow Dash! I know my reputation. Blank upstairs, Uncultured, asinine: a rough disguise Designed to catch the cosmos unawares. Observing schoolyard taunts, I thought it wise To play the boor despite the thoughts that bounced Around my head. I wrapped them tight in lies. Intelligence? I kept it unannounced, Expressed myself in actions, loud and fast, And thus became a pony never trounced. With care, I graduated tenth-to-last, Accepted jobs that lacked an indoor voice, And hoped my life continued unharrassed— Until the day I first received her smile And learned my plans were simply not worthwhile. Simplicity's the word, but not by choice. By nature, Applejack displayed a true Refreshing face. I felt my soul rejoice. Before, I'd tried dissolving diction's glue, The grip of erudition, tried to play The jock, the numbskull. That's the trope I knew. But Applejack dispensed with all display, Exposed her honest self without a qualm And laughed as well to chase the gray away. Her whole example soothed me, smoothed a balm Across my gasping psyche, made me see A path ahead, induced a wave of calm. Becoming friends? The ease was almost odd. I grinned and bumped her hoof and felt a fraud. Adapt her style to make it fit with me; Maintain bravado, sure, but tone it down; Engage with other ponies haltingly: I stretched my definitions, found this town, This Ponyville, to brim with such delight, I pushed my fears aside and gained renown. Whatever good I did—whatever right And mighty deeds—arose because of her, Because I grasped and held her gimlet sight. We pushed to places neither might prefer, And rivals, tied together flank to flank, Emerged triumphant, never happier. Our closeness grew and flowered, more than friends Until she died. Behold, the idyll ends. Canto IIAn accident, a stupid stumbled prank, A rock that tumbled fast instead of slow, A moment frozen, horrible and blank, Extinguished every hope I'd ever know. My screaming lasted days. I don't recall Specifics, just the final, fatal blow. The fault was mine, a phrase that sounds banal, A breath of air that couldn't stir a cloud, A string of words that shouldn't stab and squall. But now I'm burning, speed that's disallowed Within the normal flow of time and space, A move I often pulled to make her proud. It's all to catch her, smash the universe That claims she's got to go. I'll make it curse! "You can't, you know," a rumbling, almost bass Informs my ear. My body flares a flinch That skews me sideways, sprawled in pure disgrace. My concentration snaps, and every inch Of sky around me vanishes to black; A spotlight wraps me tight, a glowing pinch. "Forget it!" rings my shout. "For Applejack, I'll chomp electrons, chew them, spin around, And spit their ruptured shells! I'll bring her back! "And don't pretend"—I drop my voice—"you're bound To proper channels, Discord. Certainty's A dirty word to you, the way you've clowned. "Dispense with such theatrics! Let me go! Prepare for chaos, guy! Enjoy the show!" The only sound upon the lack of breeze? My pounding heart. I wait for some reply. As seconds stretch, my blood begins to freeze. "Dispense," I say again, a quiet cry That barely gets beyond my gritted teeth. "For friendship's sake, I say you can't deny—" "Enough," he says. His eyes appear beneath Some jagged brows, a red and puffy mess, Emitting sorrow's stink, a circling wreath. "I'm only here because your rhymes impress. I hadn't thought you'd last for very long, Would fall to prose in stupidness and stress." "You what?" I leap and hover, glaring hard. His floating head exudes a cold regard. "I'm stupid, yes," I say, "a clanging gong: Annoying, endless, loud. But played with care, I add a spice, enhancing any song. "And stressed? You bet! For killing someone rare And precious snaps the universe, creates Distinctive fractures, cracks that need repair. "Without her touch, I'm stuffed with leaden weights. Without her presence, shards remain of joy. Without her, nothing hums or resonates. "Without dispute, my huge mistakes destroy, So mine's the job to cross and bring her home. You wanna come? Be placed in my employ?" The darkness leaves his body. "Fine. We'll dare. You try to call me Vergil, though, I swear..." Canto IIIWith snapping talons, Discord grabs a tome From empty air. "To truly leave behind Existing bounds, we'll need a metronome." He stops and blinks. "I'm never one to mind A bit of chaos, Dash, but metered speech? And rhymes? From me? I almost feel confined..." I shrug. "It's epic. Form can overreach When life and death contend. You can't expect Prosaic stuff. We're charging through the breach "For Applejack!" He sighs and stands erect: "Because she'd find it stuffy, that's the key. To seek the body, send the intellect." Intent, I watch him tear the book in two. The covers turn to wings. He shouts, "Pursue!" Like giant moths, the halves go flapping free. Behind them through the dark, a silver trail Of dusty sparks appears and calls to me. "Pursue?" I glance at Discord. "More detail, I think, will help me know the proper course. I'm chasing them? They're slow as any snail!" "They're tracking Applejack, you silly horse." He glares with narrow eyes and bristling brows. "Observe and follow, sparing deadly force." I want to scream. His implications rouse Reactive cries and urge my blood to boil. But no. He's right. Instead, I state my vows: "I killed her, yes, but watch her soon return Alive no matter what I have to burn." His mouth's a curveless line. "I hate to spoil Dramatic, useless declarations. Still, Realities combine to thwart and foil. "Employing friendship's meager little pill, Expect a disappointing ending scene Performed alone despite your fabled will. "I've tried to flummox destiny's routine— The death awaiting Fluttershy and all— But can't. I'm not allowed to intervene." A flame erupts between his horns. It's small But bright with hope. Defiance fills its scent; Aromas blossom, spring, enchant, enthrall. "But you," he says, "when driven can't be stopped Until the final barricade's been dropped." "Defeating death." I nod. "We can't prevent The past, but let's expand the present's range." The books' detritus marks the way they went. The glowing dust has settled, looking strange: There isn't any ground, but still it sits In dusty flakes like dandruff mixed with mange. Beside me, Discord's humming. "Ah, the glitz And glamour! Strolling through the darkened lands' Extensive metaphor, the heights and pits! "The foolish pony claims she understands, Declares herself an expert unexcelled. While wisdom—" Bam! A ball of light expands, And Luna glares ahead to block the path: "Begone, buffoons, before ye rouse my wrath!" Canto IVI stop and wince. For Luna's often yelled, But now her voice resounds with biting ice: "You're facing consequences unbeheld!" I tap the unseen ground. "You want it nice Or nasty, Princess? Quick's what I prefer, But really, step aside's the best advice." Expressions flap across her face and blur, Astonishment to anger. "Mortal trash! Prepare your winding sheets and mix your myrrh! "Contesting death expands from simply rash To imbecilic! Taking action here, You court your own dishonor, Rainbow Dash! "Disperse this magic! Hie yourself away Before your commendations all decay!" I snort and stomp. "Rejection, pure and clear, Defines the worth I give my past awards! Devoid of any truth, they're straight veneer! "Dissolve my accolades! Their weight affords Me less than nothing! Tarnish them, debased—" A thought. "Or make them hers by some accords!" "Of course!" Applauding, Discord shouts, "We'll paste Them into one excessive metal glob And trade for something equally erased! "Renounce your valor, Rainbow Dash, the blob Of overweening fame that crusts your name, And shove it back at Luna! Shut her gob! "Your famous deeds will vanish, gone like smoke, And move to Applejack's account, bespoke!" I start to nod, but Luna hisses, "Shame! To stomp your laurels underhoof? Disgust Attends the thought! You think this life a game? "You earned the acclamations, earned the trust Of ponies far and wide! You'd simply throw Deserving trophies down to shabby dust?" I give my nod. "Perplexing, yes, I know, To one who spent a thousand years detained Because her prideful wrath could only grow. "You thought your fair accomplishments disdained, So kill the world! Destroy the trash who dared Believe the honest principles you feigned! "What others think I've done's the barest crumb. You cling to empty fluff? Your views succumb." Throughout my speech, as Luna gaped and stared, I'd stepped with steady tread to stand before Her frozen face, a mix of shocked and scared. "Prepare yourself," I say. "Adjust the score To zero mine by elevating hers In ways that help the one I most adore." I nod again, and Discord's talon blurs, A snap that gouges deep within my chest, Extracting something sharp as any spurs. I almost gasp but keep the pain suppressed. "Now move," I say, my voice a croaking creak, "Or tell me how I haven't passed the test." The darkness crowds around so none can hide. Another moment, Luna steps aside. Canto VThe dusty trail extends its silver streak Ahead and off away. I stump along With Discord right beside. He doesn't speak. I want to crack a joke or sing a song, But something's gone inside me, something dense That used to fill my ribs and make me strong. It doesn't matter. Sparing no expense, I'll bring her back, recharge that empty space, Return the world to partly making sense. "And yet?" The voice is sunlight, joy, and grace Despite the lack of anypony near To form the words. I barely slow my pace. The voice, renowned throughout Equestria, Belongs to her, I know: Celestia. "Imagine!" Discord flicks my folded ear. "Her Nibs herself! I'm fuddled all askew! You think she'll autograph my side or rear?" I can't withhold a laugh. "I'm sure for you, She'd sharpen every pen she ever owned To carve her name across, athwart, and through." The former princess also laughs. "I've groaned For centuries at Discord's antic wit, But now, it seems, he seeks to grow atoned." Within the dark, a shape's becoming lit, A glowing figure unmistakable. Celestia. My teeth begin to grit. She'll try to stop me. That's the bottom line. My innards twist. I'm feeling less than fine... "Unusual." Her smiling voice is full Of light the place around us sorely lacks. "Unless, of course, he's seeking more to gull. "You know him, Rainbow, know he wields an axe Intent on making trouble. Solving wrongs, Alas, is less his thing than sly attacks." She shakes her head. "With even iron tongs, I wouldn't recommend embracing trust In him. He sabotages singalongs..." I wait for Discord, wait to hear him bust A line or two, to raise his own defense, But silence settles fine as any dust. Celestia's continuing. "And so I can't allow you passage. Time to go." "I'll give a guarantee," I say. "Dispense With such contrivance. Don't you feel ashamed, Engaging noxiously in such pretense?" A tiny twitch on her, I'd call enflamed; The pastel colors jerk around her face. "A guarantee? Collateral unnamed?" I spread my wings. "Behold my sore disgrace. Detatching all my past, I think, has left Me somewhat worn. Could anything replace?" She rubs her chin. "You're looking quite bereft, It's true, but let's examine things to come. Despite the past, your future's looking deft." I nod. "Okay. The goals I might attain, I toss to Applejack to break her chain." Canto VIThe two immortals stare. "You stricken dumb?" I ask. They clear their throats, and Discord sighs: "Existence isn't quite a 'zero-sum.' "The energy of life is not a prize To win or lose. I may have called it 'trade,' But no, it's not exchanged like extra fries." "Except," Celestia replies, "you made A deal with Luna, tore away the past To help the debt that Applejack surveyed. "Whatever happened there has grown, amassed A solid weight like none I've ever felt." She licks her lips. "Or tasted. Such a blast!" A shiver shifts my spine. I shift it back. "Accept it, please: another tasty snack." "I won't." The words are quiet, almost melt Against my ear. They fall from Discord's snout. "I won't approve the cards this nag has dealt." "Approve or not"—I give his leg a clout— "You slice me open! Squeamishness away! Prepare my magic guts, and suck 'em out!" "The odds," Celestia responds, "allay The fear the spell will simply kill her dead. If not alive, her future hopes decay, "The very things we're dealing with. Instead, Perhaps a paradox will swirl, surround, And prop her up. That ought to soothe your dread." "Again," I say, "it matters not at all What Discord wants. I'm ready: stop the stall!" He gives a groan like ponies lost and drowned And slashes talons, rips the shadowed air. I bloom with pain, collapse upon the ground. Incisions seem to sprout from hoof and hair; Exploding daggers shatter, split my hide. My worst collisions simply don't compare. But still, I hear Celestia inside: "Your guarantee's accepted, floods beyond Required lengths, completely qualified. "You're halfway home and strengthening the bond In ways I can't condone but do admire. You'll find yourself the surest magic wand." Then darkness smacks me sideways, fast and hard; Engulfed in weariness, I'm feeling marred. Aware, I catch a light, a distant fire, Diffuse like fog has filled the space between Itself and me. I blink. My final pyre? But blinking cracks my eyelids. Unforeseen: I guess the things were closed. But now the light Improves and sharpens, clears away the screen To show me Discord squatted, face a fright, A mess of matted hair and crackling eyes, Beside me underneath that starless night. "Alive," I croak, "unless these pains're lies." I roll a little, not prepared to stand, And Discord cheers: "I knew you'd soon arise!" "Hooray." This second cheering quietly From Twilight Sparkle smiling down at me... Canto VIIWith blushes, Twilight speaks. "I hadn't planned To get involved, but this?" Her horn aglow, She bends to touch my head...and pain is banned. I push to rise. She says, "You need to know: Excessive guilt can only ever hurt. It's terrible to say, but let it go. "Would Applejack—?" "You don't!" I cut her curt And jab a hoof against her purple chest. "Whatever point you've got, you can't assert! "To know the wishes Applejack expressed, We've got to go, I dare to say, and ask! Beyond this course, we've nothing more than guessed! "And that's my goal! It's hardly faceted! Discover what she wants: alive or dead!" They're blinking more, and Twilight says, "The task You've set yourself, I fear, cannot be done. You'll end a broken jar, an empty flask." A whisper takes her voice. "For once begun, Descending paths will likely claim you both, Ensconce you deep. You'll never see the sun. "A tragedy's befallen all, but growth Can yet occur for those who still remain." I shake my heavy head: "I gave an oath. "My actions caused her death. I can't abstain From balancing the books and leave her there Despite the odds. I'd crack from grief and pain." "I know," she says, her scent adrift with dust. "I'll step aside. You go the way you must..." Expecting something painful makes me stare. "You won't, I mean, attempt to pluck my wings?" With pursing lips, she gives me half a glare. "We're friends. And yes, our disagreement stings, But Rainbow, please. Mistaken though you are, Success is all I hope this effort brings." She bends her neck, her horn a glowing star, And warmth extends to fill my inner holes. "I'll bring her back," I say, "from near or far." A rueful smile; the dark around her rolls, And Twilight's gone. I'm left to stand alone— Except for Discord. "Mind," he says, "the poles." He's built a trellis twined around with greens: "You talked so long, I went and planted beans." "Enough," I say. He shakes his head: "They've grown Robust and fulsome, waiting patiently While certain ponies knelt at Twilight's throne." I growl but show a grin. "You helping me? Or just committing acts that might increase The noxious gas you blow for all to see?" He quickly harvests beans. "You want a piece? You'll likely need your strength before the last Encounter seeks to end your mad caprice." The warmth of Twilight's touch is fading fast; I drag my hooves a step, again, again. "The only princess left would seem miscast." "Indeed?" A cracking splits the darkened space Revealing Cadance, hard of eye and face. Canto VIIII stop, and Cadance speaks. "So tell me when You first became convinced that breaking laws Was somehow right for any citizen?" "Forgive me, please." I snort without a pause. "I thought that love and mercy intertwined, That virtue weighed for deeds despite their flaws." "There's virtue?" Cadance asks. "Unless I'm blind, I can't imagine seeing this as that! You're twisting everything that's good, I find!" "By stepping up?" I cry. "You autocrat! Except for death, you never truly care About the mortal world! I'm just a gnat! "If love had any place within your heart, You'd celebrate! Instead, you pick apart!" "Relax! Relax!" It's Discord puffing air And words into my ear. "You'll get her riled!" Indeed, her mane's assumed a reddish glare. "The impudence!" She stomps. "It makes me wild! You think you know from love? You haven't got The first idea! Less than any child!" "Responsibility!" I shout. "Allot A friend to foul perdition? Mine's the fault, And mine's the force to counter deadly rot!" She sighs, and anger smooths its rough assault Upon her face. "The love in letting go Remains as hard as cracking any vault. "And yet? Essential, vital, deep, and pure: The path of nature's sad but always sure." "Unless," I say, "the means to overthrow The path of nature lies within the grasp Of one determined, one who seems to know." She blinks with wrinkled forehead, gives a gasp— And turns to Discord. "Keep your solemn vows! You swore you'd not undo the mortal clasp!" I turn to Discord, too. His spiky brows Engorge and fidget. "Me?" A halo pops Between his tangled horns. "My pledge allows "Assisting friends! Requires it! Nothing stops Me lending paw and talon cautiously! Besides, the quest is hers! I'm background props!" With aching knees, I turn to Cadance. "True. You want a fight, my hoof's prepared for you." She shakes her head. "You're empty, Dash, a flea Extending meager pinches, tiny bites. Beyond this point, you'll smash to fine debris. "The universe is set against these flights Of fancy, won't allow you bringing out Decedents lodged therein. They haven't rights "Of immigration once they're here. To flout Established law? Impossible! It's done." She sighs. I grin. "I sense a bit of doubt. "Besides, to push the limits? Perfect fun. To question basic common sense? Superb. Sublime. And, well, I finish once begun." "You'll die," she says, "a pointless, needless waste. But fine." She steps aside with clear distaste. Canto IXI give a nod, my heart in full perturb, As Cadance fades. Beside me, Discord snorts. "You think perturb's a noun? The word's a verb." I drag my hooves ahead. "I'm leaking quarts, I guess, if all my inner thoughts appear Distinct enough to serve you field reports." Awaiting some riposte, I strain to hear In vain. I look, and Discord's face distends. "You're more a cloud of dust," he says, "a smear, "Prismatic blue and frayed around the ends." A swallow snakes along his lanky throat. "I blame my fear on you because we're friends!" I'd say I'm fine but lack the wherewithal— And then the ground is gone. I start to fall. Extending wings, I find I fail to float, The wind an utter darkness rushing through. I gape my jaws to raise a warning note— Except a solid something strokes my shoe While color, light, and grassy scent expand, A gentle breeze like none I ever knew. A purple evening sky enfolds a land Of greenest pastures, stretching off, away. I wince as painful knees attempt to stand. I see what Discord meant. My skin's astray, A bluish mist between the ground and me. Within my bones, I feel the breezes play. Above, the gloaming shows a single star. Behind, that perfect voice: "Well, there you are." I try to turn, but swirling gassily, My sense of self befuddles, spatters, spills, Unbalances my shreds of sanity. The sight before me grabs my heart and stills My spirit's exodus. It's Applejack Alive with wings and horn. She gives me chills. "I always knew," she says, "you maniac, That all yer fooling someday'd turn awry. But alicorn me up? We're switching back!" "We can't," I say. "A pony has to die. Remaining here, I'll take your former spot. You take my life and go. I'm sorry. Bye..." She shakes her head. "You make a lousy saint. And leave you here? I won't and can't and ain't." Objections fill my throat, but AJ's not The sort to pay attention. Muscles surge Along her neck. "Relax. We gotta shot." I'm asking, "Shot?" when golden lights emerge From AJ's horn and sweep to wrap me tight. She sucks a breath; her nose and I converge. I make a noise that might resemble fright As darkness washes round, and I'm within, A part of AJ. Talk about delight! I'm seeing out her eyes. I feel her skin. "You ready?" comes her voice, and I concur. My thoughts retrace my path, and we begin. We pop and witness Discord swing an axe Against the darkness, scarred with many whacks. Canto X"It's you! But both! And—" Discord starts to blur, His shaking head a twitching, writhing mass That stops to grin. "You're looking pleasanter." I laugh and say, "We're back from death's crevasse." I hear the sounds and words and then recall I'm less a solid thing and more a gas. "Forget it," Discord says. "You've braved the squall By slinging paradox with mad aplomb. You shouldn't seek to understand at all." "I gotcha." Applejack's remaining calm Because, of course, she does and always will. Except she isn't speaking. That's a bomb. Her voice is ringing fine throughout my head, So how—? I'll think of something else instead. I breathe without a breath and say, "But still, This rescue plan that's met with such success Rejected parts where I recrossed the sill. "And yet? I'm here in ways I can't express. My sacrificial offering denied, I'm done with playing games of cosmic chess. "I love you, Applejack, but stuck inside Describes a fate I'd rather not embrace." A laugh from Applejack: "Relax and ride." She nods to Discord. Joy ignites his face. He twirls his axe. "And thus we launch this ship!" He smacks the dark. It shatters everyplace. Imperfect sunlight bursts, a welcome touch. That stuff in death's domain? A little much. "Hoo-whee!" from Applejack. "I've missed the grip Of honest grass and ground. And now with these?" She flaps her wings, her horn a glowing tip. "I reckon things've changed. But lemme sneeze And getcha out my innards, Dash. You set?" "For what?" I ask, awash in slight unease. She's rearing back and blasting out a jet From nose and mouth that laps me up and down And flings me out. I'm tinged with some regret... Aloft, however, nothing wears a frown. My wings effective, flying once again, I spin and tumble, dance, a perfect clown— Until I see as acrobatics slow The Apple family graveyard sits below. Recalling all that happened there and then, I land to stand with Applejack beside Her former grave, a mound within the glen. "Exhume it," Discord says. "I must confide You'll find it empty now you've both returned With extra limbs and everything applied." "With what?" I ask, my stomach slightly churned. "With that," from Applejack. She turns her head And clacks her horn against the undiscerned: My own protruding horn. Disquieted, I blink and stare and blink and stare some more. "You never think," she says. "You charge instead. "Despite the cost." She's giving tangled grins. "The newest alicorns. We're almost twins." Canto XI"Hooray!" Appearing, Twilight shouts, "I swore I wouldn't dare allow a single hope! But watch it flutter, seize the air, and soar!" She wraps her wings around us both. "To cope With immortality myself alone Intimidated, made me whisper 'nope.' "Together now although I can't condone Your methods, Dash"—she gives a partial glare— "I can't deny I'm glad your head's a stone." "Y'know," says Applejack, "I'm thinking where We're standing might prefer another phrase Than 'head' and 'stone.'" It's Twilight's turn to stare. But Discord grins, and Twilight's blushes spread. "C'mon," says AJ. "'Nuff with being dead." The celebration lasts for forty days When Applejack returns to Ponyville. Our circumstances boggle, thrill, amaze. We call on Cadance, looking slightly ill. Apologies are offered—mostly mine; Her face conveys she tastes a bitter pill. If mortals, after all, can go divine By doing stupid things, should she support Her husband's deeds that might be asinine? When asking Applejack in bed, a snort Conveys her thoughts. "They surely can't expect The rules to stay the same from field to court. "We carved ourselves a path that ain't allowed. They do the same, they maybe skip the shroud." Celestia and Luna don't object In any way that matters much, I guess, Since Twilight's now the ruling architect. "Irregular," says Luna. "Nonetheless, Your perseverance brought the victory, A triumph only fools could fail to bless." "Perhaps." Celestia decants her tea. "I'd point to love as more the driving force That pushed your choice to break the world's decree." "Perhaps," from Discord chomping down a course Of lemon wedges. "Still, we can't ignore Annoyance. That's the cause of most divorce." Beside me, AJ chuckles. "Don'tcha fret. With me and Dash, you ain't seen nothing yet." And yes, it's true: we argue like before. It shows we're still ourselves despite the change, Despite our destination's altered shore. They call us "princess." That's a little strange. But Applejack's domain is earth—surprise!— While mine is air and things along that range. It's great in every way. I know the skies Exhaustively, beyond my sweetest dreams. My weeks aloft will always energize. Then home again to AJ, hauling reams Of crops from nurtured ground, her massive cart Enough to stump a dozen other teams. It's work we love: essential, tough, and fun. Together always, life has just begun.
Canto IDestruction! That's the stuff! I pull apart The air itself, my wake a hurricane. Tornadoes crash and howl within my heart. A thought begins to bubble, asks my brain, "Perhaps these vast reactions overstrip?" Dismissing such concerns, I summon rain. The skies should weep! The winds should roar and whip! Clichés should burst and tear the firmament, Exploring ways to shatter, rend, and rip! For ways are out there, ways to circumvent The laws of nature—all my life declares That statement true—to break or leave them bent. My sonic rainboom blisters space to ash. They'll rue the day they messed with Rainbow Dash! I know my reputation. Blank upstairs, Uncultured, asinine: a rough disguise Designed to catch the cosmos unawares. Observing schoolyard taunts, I thought it wise To play the boor despite the thoughts that bounced Around my head. I wrapped them tight in lies. Intelligence? I kept it unannounced, Expressed myself in actions, loud and fast, And thus became a pony never trounced. With care, I graduated tenth-to-last, Accepted jobs that lacked an indoor voice, And hoped my life continued unharrassed— Until the day I first received her smile And learned my plans were simply not worthwhile. Simplicity's the word, but not by choice. By nature, Applejack displayed a true Refreshing face. I felt my soul rejoice. Before, I'd tried dissolving diction's glue, The grip of erudition, tried to play The jock, the numbskull. That's the trope I knew. But Applejack dispensed with all display, Exposed her honest self without a qualm And laughed as well to chase the gray away. Her whole example soothed me, smoothed a balm Across my gasping psyche, made me see A path ahead, induced a wave of calm. Becoming friends? The ease was almost odd. I grinned and bumped her hoof and felt a fraud. Adapt her style to make it fit with me; Maintain bravado, sure, but tone it down; Engage with other ponies haltingly: I stretched my definitions, found this town, This Ponyville, to brim with such delight, I pushed my fears aside and gained renown. Whatever good I did—whatever right And mighty deeds—arose because of her, Because I grasped and held her gimlet sight. We pushed to places neither might prefer, And rivals, tied together flank to flank, Emerged triumphant, never happier. Our closeness grew and flowered, more than friends Until she died. Behold, the idyll ends.
Canto IIAn accident, a stupid stumbled prank, A rock that tumbled fast instead of slow, A moment frozen, horrible and blank, Extinguished every hope I'd ever know. My screaming lasted days. I don't recall Specifics, just the final, fatal blow. The fault was mine, a phrase that sounds banal, A breath of air that couldn't stir a cloud, A string of words that shouldn't stab and squall. But now I'm burning, speed that's disallowed Within the normal flow of time and space, A move I often pulled to make her proud. It's all to catch her, smash the universe That claims she's got to go. I'll make it curse! "You can't, you know," a rumbling, almost bass Informs my ear. My body flares a flinch That skews me sideways, sprawled in pure disgrace. My concentration snaps, and every inch Of sky around me vanishes to black; A spotlight wraps me tight, a glowing pinch. "Forget it!" rings my shout. "For Applejack, I'll chomp electrons, chew them, spin around, And spit their ruptured shells! I'll bring her back! "And don't pretend"—I drop my voice—"you're bound To proper channels, Discord. Certainty's A dirty word to you, the way you've clowned. "Dispense with such theatrics! Let me go! Prepare for chaos, guy! Enjoy the show!" The only sound upon the lack of breeze? My pounding heart. I wait for some reply. As seconds stretch, my blood begins to freeze. "Dispense," I say again, a quiet cry That barely gets beyond my gritted teeth. "For friendship's sake, I say you can't deny—" "Enough," he says. His eyes appear beneath Some jagged brows, a red and puffy mess, Emitting sorrow's stink, a circling wreath. "I'm only here because your rhymes impress. I hadn't thought you'd last for very long, Would fall to prose in stupidness and stress." "You what?" I leap and hover, glaring hard. His floating head exudes a cold regard. "I'm stupid, yes," I say, "a clanging gong: Annoying, endless, loud. But played with care, I add a spice, enhancing any song. "And stressed? You bet! For killing someone rare And precious snaps the universe, creates Distinctive fractures, cracks that need repair. "Without her touch, I'm stuffed with leaden weights. Without her presence, shards remain of joy. Without her, nothing hums or resonates. "Without dispute, my huge mistakes destroy, So mine's the job to cross and bring her home. You wanna come? Be placed in my employ?" The darkness leaves his body. "Fine. We'll dare. You try to call me Vergil, though, I swear..."
Canto IIIWith snapping talons, Discord grabs a tome From empty air. "To truly leave behind Existing bounds, we'll need a metronome." He stops and blinks. "I'm never one to mind A bit of chaos, Dash, but metered speech? And rhymes? From me? I almost feel confined..." I shrug. "It's epic. Form can overreach When life and death contend. You can't expect Prosaic stuff. We're charging through the breach "For Applejack!" He sighs and stands erect: "Because she'd find it stuffy, that's the key. To seek the body, send the intellect." Intent, I watch him tear the book in two. The covers turn to wings. He shouts, "Pursue!" Like giant moths, the halves go flapping free. Behind them through the dark, a silver trail Of dusty sparks appears and calls to me. "Pursue?" I glance at Discord. "More detail, I think, will help me know the proper course. I'm chasing them? They're slow as any snail!" "They're tracking Applejack, you silly horse." He glares with narrow eyes and bristling brows. "Observe and follow, sparing deadly force." I want to scream. His implications rouse Reactive cries and urge my blood to boil. But no. He's right. Instead, I state my vows: "I killed her, yes, but watch her soon return Alive no matter what I have to burn." His mouth's a curveless line. "I hate to spoil Dramatic, useless declarations. Still, Realities combine to thwart and foil. "Employing friendship's meager little pill, Expect a disappointing ending scene Performed alone despite your fabled will. "I've tried to flummox destiny's routine— The death awaiting Fluttershy and all— But can't. I'm not allowed to intervene." A flame erupts between his horns. It's small But bright with hope. Defiance fills its scent; Aromas blossom, spring, enchant, enthrall. "But you," he says, "when driven can't be stopped Until the final barricade's been dropped." "Defeating death." I nod. "We can't prevent The past, but let's expand the present's range." The books' detritus marks the way they went. The glowing dust has settled, looking strange: There isn't any ground, but still it sits In dusty flakes like dandruff mixed with mange. Beside me, Discord's humming. "Ah, the glitz And glamour! Strolling through the darkened lands' Extensive metaphor, the heights and pits! "The foolish pony claims she understands, Declares herself an expert unexcelled. While wisdom—" Bam! A ball of light expands, And Luna glares ahead to block the path: "Begone, buffoons, before ye rouse my wrath!"
Canto IVI stop and wince. For Luna's often yelled, But now her voice resounds with biting ice: "You're facing consequences unbeheld!" I tap the unseen ground. "You want it nice Or nasty, Princess? Quick's what I prefer, But really, step aside's the best advice." Expressions flap across her face and blur, Astonishment to anger. "Mortal trash! Prepare your winding sheets and mix your myrrh! "Contesting death expands from simply rash To imbecilic! Taking action here, You court your own dishonor, Rainbow Dash! "Disperse this magic! Hie yourself away Before your commendations all decay!" I snort and stomp. "Rejection, pure and clear, Defines the worth I give my past awards! Devoid of any truth, they're straight veneer! "Dissolve my accolades! Their weight affords Me less than nothing! Tarnish them, debased—" A thought. "Or make them hers by some accords!" "Of course!" Applauding, Discord shouts, "We'll paste Them into one excessive metal glob And trade for something equally erased! "Renounce your valor, Rainbow Dash, the blob Of overweening fame that crusts your name, And shove it back at Luna! Shut her gob! "Your famous deeds will vanish, gone like smoke, And move to Applejack's account, bespoke!" I start to nod, but Luna hisses, "Shame! To stomp your laurels underhoof? Disgust Attends the thought! You think this life a game? "You earned the acclamations, earned the trust Of ponies far and wide! You'd simply throw Deserving trophies down to shabby dust?" I give my nod. "Perplexing, yes, I know, To one who spent a thousand years detained Because her prideful wrath could only grow. "You thought your fair accomplishments disdained, So kill the world! Destroy the trash who dared Believe the honest principles you feigned! "What others think I've done's the barest crumb. You cling to empty fluff? Your views succumb." Throughout my speech, as Luna gaped and stared, I'd stepped with steady tread to stand before Her frozen face, a mix of shocked and scared. "Prepare yourself," I say. "Adjust the score To zero mine by elevating hers In ways that help the one I most adore." I nod again, and Discord's talon blurs, A snap that gouges deep within my chest, Extracting something sharp as any spurs. I almost gasp but keep the pain suppressed. "Now move," I say, my voice a croaking creak, "Or tell me how I haven't passed the test." The darkness crowds around so none can hide. Another moment, Luna steps aside.
Canto VThe dusty trail extends its silver streak Ahead and off away. I stump along With Discord right beside. He doesn't speak. I want to crack a joke or sing a song, But something's gone inside me, something dense That used to fill my ribs and make me strong. It doesn't matter. Sparing no expense, I'll bring her back, recharge that empty space, Return the world to partly making sense. "And yet?" The voice is sunlight, joy, and grace Despite the lack of anypony near To form the words. I barely slow my pace. The voice, renowned throughout Equestria, Belongs to her, I know: Celestia. "Imagine!" Discord flicks my folded ear. "Her Nibs herself! I'm fuddled all askew! You think she'll autograph my side or rear?" I can't withhold a laugh. "I'm sure for you, She'd sharpen every pen she ever owned To carve her name across, athwart, and through." The former princess also laughs. "I've groaned For centuries at Discord's antic wit, But now, it seems, he seeks to grow atoned." Within the dark, a shape's becoming lit, A glowing figure unmistakable. Celestia. My teeth begin to grit. She'll try to stop me. That's the bottom line. My innards twist. I'm feeling less than fine... "Unusual." Her smiling voice is full Of light the place around us sorely lacks. "Unless, of course, he's seeking more to gull. "You know him, Rainbow, know he wields an axe Intent on making trouble. Solving wrongs, Alas, is less his thing than sly attacks." She shakes her head. "With even iron tongs, I wouldn't recommend embracing trust In him. He sabotages singalongs..." I wait for Discord, wait to hear him bust A line or two, to raise his own defense, But silence settles fine as any dust. Celestia's continuing. "And so I can't allow you passage. Time to go." "I'll give a guarantee," I say. "Dispense With such contrivance. Don't you feel ashamed, Engaging noxiously in such pretense?" A tiny twitch on her, I'd call enflamed; The pastel colors jerk around her face. "A guarantee? Collateral unnamed?" I spread my wings. "Behold my sore disgrace. Detatching all my past, I think, has left Me somewhat worn. Could anything replace?" She rubs her chin. "You're looking quite bereft, It's true, but let's examine things to come. Despite the past, your future's looking deft." I nod. "Okay. The goals I might attain, I toss to Applejack to break her chain."
Canto VIThe two immortals stare. "You stricken dumb?" I ask. They clear their throats, and Discord sighs: "Existence isn't quite a 'zero-sum.' "The energy of life is not a prize To win or lose. I may have called it 'trade,' But no, it's not exchanged like extra fries." "Except," Celestia replies, "you made A deal with Luna, tore away the past To help the debt that Applejack surveyed. "Whatever happened there has grown, amassed A solid weight like none I've ever felt." She licks her lips. "Or tasted. Such a blast!" A shiver shifts my spine. I shift it back. "Accept it, please: another tasty snack." "I won't." The words are quiet, almost melt Against my ear. They fall from Discord's snout. "I won't approve the cards this nag has dealt." "Approve or not"—I give his leg a clout— "You slice me open! Squeamishness away! Prepare my magic guts, and suck 'em out!" "The odds," Celestia responds, "allay The fear the spell will simply kill her dead. If not alive, her future hopes decay, "The very things we're dealing with. Instead, Perhaps a paradox will swirl, surround, And prop her up. That ought to soothe your dread." "Again," I say, "it matters not at all What Discord wants. I'm ready: stop the stall!" He gives a groan like ponies lost and drowned And slashes talons, rips the shadowed air. I bloom with pain, collapse upon the ground. Incisions seem to sprout from hoof and hair; Exploding daggers shatter, split my hide. My worst collisions simply don't compare. But still, I hear Celestia inside: "Your guarantee's accepted, floods beyond Required lengths, completely qualified. "You're halfway home and strengthening the bond In ways I can't condone but do admire. You'll find yourself the surest magic wand." Then darkness smacks me sideways, fast and hard; Engulfed in weariness, I'm feeling marred. Aware, I catch a light, a distant fire, Diffuse like fog has filled the space between Itself and me. I blink. My final pyre? But blinking cracks my eyelids. Unforeseen: I guess the things were closed. But now the light Improves and sharpens, clears away the screen To show me Discord squatted, face a fright, A mess of matted hair and crackling eyes, Beside me underneath that starless night. "Alive," I croak, "unless these pains're lies." I roll a little, not prepared to stand, And Discord cheers: "I knew you'd soon arise!" "Hooray." This second cheering quietly From Twilight Sparkle smiling down at me...
Canto VIIWith blushes, Twilight speaks. "I hadn't planned To get involved, but this?" Her horn aglow, She bends to touch my head...and pain is banned. I push to rise. She says, "You need to know: Excessive guilt can only ever hurt. It's terrible to say, but let it go. "Would Applejack—?" "You don't!" I cut her curt And jab a hoof against her purple chest. "Whatever point you've got, you can't assert! "To know the wishes Applejack expressed, We've got to go, I dare to say, and ask! Beyond this course, we've nothing more than guessed! "And that's my goal! It's hardly faceted! Discover what she wants: alive or dead!" They're blinking more, and Twilight says, "The task You've set yourself, I fear, cannot be done. You'll end a broken jar, an empty flask." A whisper takes her voice. "For once begun, Descending paths will likely claim you both, Ensconce you deep. You'll never see the sun. "A tragedy's befallen all, but growth Can yet occur for those who still remain." I shake my heavy head: "I gave an oath. "My actions caused her death. I can't abstain From balancing the books and leave her there Despite the odds. I'd crack from grief and pain." "I know," she says, her scent adrift with dust. "I'll step aside. You go the way you must..." Expecting something painful makes me stare. "You won't, I mean, attempt to pluck my wings?" With pursing lips, she gives me half a glare. "We're friends. And yes, our disagreement stings, But Rainbow, please. Mistaken though you are, Success is all I hope this effort brings." She bends her neck, her horn a glowing star, And warmth extends to fill my inner holes. "I'll bring her back," I say, "from near or far." A rueful smile; the dark around her rolls, And Twilight's gone. I'm left to stand alone— Except for Discord. "Mind," he says, "the poles." He's built a trellis twined around with greens: "You talked so long, I went and planted beans." "Enough," I say. He shakes his head: "They've grown Robust and fulsome, waiting patiently While certain ponies knelt at Twilight's throne." I growl but show a grin. "You helping me? Or just committing acts that might increase The noxious gas you blow for all to see?" He quickly harvests beans. "You want a piece? You'll likely need your strength before the last Encounter seeks to end your mad caprice." The warmth of Twilight's touch is fading fast; I drag my hooves a step, again, again. "The only princess left would seem miscast." "Indeed?" A cracking splits the darkened space Revealing Cadance, hard of eye and face.
Canto VIIII stop, and Cadance speaks. "So tell me when You first became convinced that breaking laws Was somehow right for any citizen?" "Forgive me, please." I snort without a pause. "I thought that love and mercy intertwined, That virtue weighed for deeds despite their flaws." "There's virtue?" Cadance asks. "Unless I'm blind, I can't imagine seeing this as that! You're twisting everything that's good, I find!" "By stepping up?" I cry. "You autocrat! Except for death, you never truly care About the mortal world! I'm just a gnat! "If love had any place within your heart, You'd celebrate! Instead, you pick apart!" "Relax! Relax!" It's Discord puffing air And words into my ear. "You'll get her riled!" Indeed, her mane's assumed a reddish glare. "The impudence!" She stomps. "It makes me wild! You think you know from love? You haven't got The first idea! Less than any child!" "Responsibility!" I shout. "Allot A friend to foul perdition? Mine's the fault, And mine's the force to counter deadly rot!" She sighs, and anger smooths its rough assault Upon her face. "The love in letting go Remains as hard as cracking any vault. "And yet? Essential, vital, deep, and pure: The path of nature's sad but always sure." "Unless," I say, "the means to overthrow The path of nature lies within the grasp Of one determined, one who seems to know." She blinks with wrinkled forehead, gives a gasp— And turns to Discord. "Keep your solemn vows! You swore you'd not undo the mortal clasp!" I turn to Discord, too. His spiky brows Engorge and fidget. "Me?" A halo pops Between his tangled horns. "My pledge allows "Assisting friends! Requires it! Nothing stops Me lending paw and talon cautiously! Besides, the quest is hers! I'm background props!" With aching knees, I turn to Cadance. "True. You want a fight, my hoof's prepared for you." She shakes her head. "You're empty, Dash, a flea Extending meager pinches, tiny bites. Beyond this point, you'll smash to fine debris. "The universe is set against these flights Of fancy, won't allow you bringing out Decedents lodged therein. They haven't rights "Of immigration once they're here. To flout Established law? Impossible! It's done." She sighs. I grin. "I sense a bit of doubt. "Besides, to push the limits? Perfect fun. To question basic common sense? Superb. Sublime. And, well, I finish once begun." "You'll die," she says, "a pointless, needless waste. But fine." She steps aside with clear distaste.
Canto IXI give a nod, my heart in full perturb, As Cadance fades. Beside me, Discord snorts. "You think perturb's a noun? The word's a verb." I drag my hooves ahead. "I'm leaking quarts, I guess, if all my inner thoughts appear Distinct enough to serve you field reports." Awaiting some riposte, I strain to hear In vain. I look, and Discord's face distends. "You're more a cloud of dust," he says, "a smear, "Prismatic blue and frayed around the ends." A swallow snakes along his lanky throat. "I blame my fear on you because we're friends!" I'd say I'm fine but lack the wherewithal— And then the ground is gone. I start to fall. Extending wings, I find I fail to float, The wind an utter darkness rushing through. I gape my jaws to raise a warning note— Except a solid something strokes my shoe While color, light, and grassy scent expand, A gentle breeze like none I ever knew. A purple evening sky enfolds a land Of greenest pastures, stretching off, away. I wince as painful knees attempt to stand. I see what Discord meant. My skin's astray, A bluish mist between the ground and me. Within my bones, I feel the breezes play. Above, the gloaming shows a single star. Behind, that perfect voice: "Well, there you are." I try to turn, but swirling gassily, My sense of self befuddles, spatters, spills, Unbalances my shreds of sanity. The sight before me grabs my heart and stills My spirit's exodus. It's Applejack Alive with wings and horn. She gives me chills. "I always knew," she says, "you maniac, That all yer fooling someday'd turn awry. But alicorn me up? We're switching back!" "We can't," I say. "A pony has to die. Remaining here, I'll take your former spot. You take my life and go. I'm sorry. Bye..." She shakes her head. "You make a lousy saint. And leave you here? I won't and can't and ain't." Objections fill my throat, but AJ's not The sort to pay attention. Muscles surge Along her neck. "Relax. We gotta shot." I'm asking, "Shot?" when golden lights emerge From AJ's horn and sweep to wrap me tight. She sucks a breath; her nose and I converge. I make a noise that might resemble fright As darkness washes round, and I'm within, A part of AJ. Talk about delight! I'm seeing out her eyes. I feel her skin. "You ready?" comes her voice, and I concur. My thoughts retrace my path, and we begin. We pop and witness Discord swing an axe Against the darkness, scarred with many whacks.
Canto X"It's you! But both! And—" Discord starts to blur, His shaking head a twitching, writhing mass That stops to grin. "You're looking pleasanter." I laugh and say, "We're back from death's crevasse." I hear the sounds and words and then recall I'm less a solid thing and more a gas. "Forget it," Discord says. "You've braved the squall By slinging paradox with mad aplomb. You shouldn't seek to understand at all." "I gotcha." Applejack's remaining calm Because, of course, she does and always will. Except she isn't speaking. That's a bomb. Her voice is ringing fine throughout my head, So how—? I'll think of something else instead. I breathe without a breath and say, "But still, This rescue plan that's met with such success Rejected parts where I recrossed the sill. "And yet? I'm here in ways I can't express. My sacrificial offering denied, I'm done with playing games of cosmic chess. "I love you, Applejack, but stuck inside Describes a fate I'd rather not embrace." A laugh from Applejack: "Relax and ride." She nods to Discord. Joy ignites his face. He twirls his axe. "And thus we launch this ship!" He smacks the dark. It shatters everyplace. Imperfect sunlight bursts, a welcome touch. That stuff in death's domain? A little much. "Hoo-whee!" from Applejack. "I've missed the grip Of honest grass and ground. And now with these?" She flaps her wings, her horn a glowing tip. "I reckon things've changed. But lemme sneeze And getcha out my innards, Dash. You set?" "For what?" I ask, awash in slight unease. She's rearing back and blasting out a jet From nose and mouth that laps me up and down And flings me out. I'm tinged with some regret... Aloft, however, nothing wears a frown. My wings effective, flying once again, I spin and tumble, dance, a perfect clown— Until I see as acrobatics slow The Apple family graveyard sits below. Recalling all that happened there and then, I land to stand with Applejack beside Her former grave, a mound within the glen. "Exhume it," Discord says. "I must confide You'll find it empty now you've both returned With extra limbs and everything applied." "With what?" I ask, my stomach slightly churned. "With that," from Applejack. She turns her head And clacks her horn against the undiscerned: My own protruding horn. Disquieted, I blink and stare and blink and stare some more. "You never think," she says. "You charge instead. "Despite the cost." She's giving tangled grins. "The newest alicorns. We're almost twins."
Canto XI"Hooray!" Appearing, Twilight shouts, "I swore I wouldn't dare allow a single hope! But watch it flutter, seize the air, and soar!" She wraps her wings around us both. "To cope With immortality myself alone Intimidated, made me whisper 'nope.' "Together now although I can't condone Your methods, Dash"—she gives a partial glare— "I can't deny I'm glad your head's a stone." "Y'know," says Applejack, "I'm thinking where We're standing might prefer another phrase Than 'head' and 'stone.'" It's Twilight's turn to stare. But Discord grins, and Twilight's blushes spread. "C'mon," says AJ. "'Nuff with being dead." The celebration lasts for forty days When Applejack returns to Ponyville. Our circumstances boggle, thrill, amaze. We call on Cadance, looking slightly ill. Apologies are offered—mostly mine; Her face conveys she tastes a bitter pill. If mortals, after all, can go divine By doing stupid things, should she support Her husband's deeds that might be asinine? When asking Applejack in bed, a snort Conveys her thoughts. "They surely can't expect The rules to stay the same from field to court. "We carved ourselves a path that ain't allowed. They do the same, they maybe skip the shroud." Celestia and Luna don't object In any way that matters much, I guess, Since Twilight's now the ruling architect. "Irregular," says Luna. "Nonetheless, Your perseverance brought the victory, A triumph only fools could fail to bless." "Perhaps." Celestia decants her tea. "I'd point to love as more the driving force That pushed your choice to break the world's decree." "Perhaps," from Discord chomping down a course Of lemon wedges. "Still, we can't ignore Annoyance. That's the cause of most divorce." Beside me, AJ chuckles. "Don'tcha fret. With me and Dash, you ain't seen nothing yet." And yes, it's true: we argue like before. It shows we're still ourselves despite the change, Despite our destination's altered shore. They call us "princess." That's a little strange. But Applejack's domain is earth—surprise!— While mine is air and things along that range. It's great in every way. I know the skies Exhaustively, beyond my sweetest dreams. My weeks aloft will always energize. Then home again to AJ, hauling reams Of crops from nurtured ground, her massive cart Enough to stump a dozen other teams. It's work we love: essential, tough, and fun. Together always, life has just begun.
