The sun had risen by now, and the first rays gently streamed through the window. Yet I felt no warmth. It was as if the sun shone right through me, leaving no trace. The night had been a restless jumble of waking moments and short, dreamless phases of sleep. My body felt heavy.

Slowly, I sat up, my gaze wandering around the room. Spike was already up; his bed was empty. He was probably making us breakfast.

I sat there for another moment, staring into the emptiness before me, as if waiting for something that would never come. A part of me wanted to stay in bed, pull the blanket over my head, and ignore the day. But that wasn’t an option. I had to keep going. Somehow.

I stood up, listening to the melodic clatter of my hooves on the wooden floor, a strangely soothing sound in the quiet of the library. As I descended the stairs, I saw Spike in the kitchen. He stood at the stove, making us some sandwiches from the leftover bread.

When he noticed me, he turned toward the stairs. His smile - it was there, as always, but something about it felt... off. It seemed forced, as if he was trying too hard.

“Good morning, Twilight,” he said, his voice attempting to sound cheerful. “How are you today?”

He placed a plate of three sandwiches on the table. His gaze lingered on me a moment too long, as if searching for something I couldn’t give him.

“I didn’t sleep well,” I stated plainly, keeping my voice devoid of much emotion. “But other than that, I’m fine.”

I sat at the table, grabbed one of the sandwiches, and began chewing mechanically. “And how are you?” I asked, more out of habit than real interest, forcing a weak smile.

“Well, we definitely need to go to the market today,” Spike replied, sitting down next to me. “Our cupboards are almost completely empty.”

He spoke calmly, but then hesitated for a moment before continuing. “Uh, Twilight,” he began, his voice now less subtle, with clear concern in it, “did you make yourself something to eat in the kitchen last night?” His eyes searched mine, and I could see a flicker of doubt there.

“Yes,” I replied shortly. “Just a slice of bread with jam, nothing more.” I took another bite of my sandwich, trying to dismiss his question as quickly as possible, as if it were unimportant.

But Spike kept staring, his large eyes filled with uncertainty. “But... that wasn’t jam on the floor,” he said, his nervousness growing. Why was he so nervous?

“There was something on the floor?” I asked, confused, trying to remember. But there was nothing. I couldn’t recall dropping anything last night. “Strange. I didn’t notice anything.”

“Twilight, there were two drops of blood on the floor. Did you hurt yourself?” Spike’s voice was laced with worry, almost panicked, and his eyes flashed with uncertainty.

Ah, so that’s what the concern was about. “Don’t worry, Spike,” I said, forcing a reassuring smile. “It’s nothing serious. I just cut myself a little while slicing the bread. Barely worth mentioning.” My words were light, almost casual, as if it truly were nothing.

“That’s never happened before,” Spike pointed out, and I could hear the faint hint of accusation in his voice. “You’re a unicorn, Twilight. How could something like that even happen? You hold the knife with your magic.”

His words hit me, but I didn’t let it show. He was right. That had never happened before. How could I have been so clumsy? “It was late, and I was tired,” I replied with an almost amused tone, trying to push down the unease within me. “Don’t worry so much, Spike. Little accidents can happen to anyone.”

He studied me for a moment before standing up, taking the plates from the table, and carrying them to the sink. “Well, if you say so,” he muttered, but the concern in his voice hadn’t completely disappeared.

The rest of the morning passed uneventfully. I went to the bathroom and got ready for the day, and Spike did the same once I was finished. We didn’t exchange any words.

The library wouldn’t open for a few more hours, so we decided to use the time to go to the market and pick up some much-needed groceries. I packed a bag, and together we set off.

When we reached the market, it seemed like all of Ponyville was already awake. The colorful stalls were surrounded by cheerful ponies chatting animatedly and exchanging goods. Laughter filled the air, and everywhere ponies greeted each other, as if it were the most natural and beautiful part of their day.

While Spike looked over a few stalls, I stood off to the side, letting my gaze drift over the ponies. It came so easily to them -talking, laughing. Everything seemed so effortless.

One of the vendors, who was happily offering carrots, waved at me with a friendly smile. Carrot Top. We had spoken a few times before. She was always kind, always in good spirits. I forced myself to smile and waved back cheerfully. That was what was expected of me, wasn’t it? That was my role. Smile, wave, be nice.

Spike returned, carrying a bag full of various vegetables, almost bigger than he was. I could tell he was struggling with the weight, but he didn’t want to ask for help. He could be as stubborn as I was.

With a soft smile, I lit up my horn and used my magic to lift the bag - and Spike as well - placing them both on my back. “What do we need next?” I asked, trying to keep the day’s routine going.

Spike grabbed the shopping list from my saddlebag and crossed off a few items. “Next, we need some fruit,” he said, nodding in satisfaction. “Maybe we can visit Applejack at her stand and buy some apples.”

I turned in the direction where I knew Applejack had set up her stand and started trotting steadily. As we walked through the market, a few other ponies greeted us with friendly smiles. A smile, a nod, a few words.

When we reached the stand, I noticed a small line. At the back, I spotted Rarity, patiently waiting for her turn. “Hey, Rarity!” I heard Spike call out, his voice full of excitement. Apparently, I wasn’t the only one who had noticed her.

Rarity turned and saw us. A bright, genuine smile spread across her face as she greeted us. “Oh, hello, you two!” she said in her usual friendly manner. Then her gaze slid over me, and I could see her looking me up and down.

“Twilight, darling,” she began in a soft but concerned voice. “Are you getting enough sleep?”

Was it that obvious? I had gone to great lengths to cover the signs of my sleepless nights, but Rarity’s sharp eyes missed nothing. If anyone would notice, it would be her.

For a moment, I felt my shoulders tense. I had to keep control. A calm, collected smile crept onto my face, though inside, I felt my nerves tighten. “Oh, Rarity, I’m fine,” I said, trying to make my voice sound as steady as possible. “Just a few restless nights. Nothing you need to worry about.”

Rarity frowned, not entirely convinced. “Well, I hope so. You know, it’s important for a lady to take care of herself, Twilight. I know your studies are important to you, but don’t neglect yourself in the process.” Her voice was gentle, but her eyes still scrutinized me, as if trying to see through my smile.

Spike, who had been listening to the conversation, nodded eagerly. “Yeah, Twilight! You’ve been so distant lately. Maybe you should take a break and get some rest.”

I turned slightly away, trying to escape the intensity of their gazes. “I know, I know,” I said quietly. “But really, it’s nothing. I’ve just... had a lot on my mind.” It wasn’t a lie, but it didn’t feel like the whole truth either.

Rarity placed a hoof on my shoulder and gave me a warm smile. “If you ever want to talk, Twilight, I’m here for you. Sometimes it helps to just get your thoughts out.”

Her offer was sincere, I knew that. Rarity was always someone who wanted to listen and help. But I couldn’t accept it. What kind of friend would I be if I told her I didn’t feel comfortable in Ponyville? That I didn’t enjoy being here, didn’t enjoy being with them? What would they think? What would Celestia think?

“Thank you, Rarity,” I said, forcing a smile that felt far too heavy on my face. “That’s really kind of you. But I’m fine. It’s just... a lot going on at the moment.” My voice sounded lighter than I actually felt.

Rarity didn’t seem fully convinced, but she nodded anyway. “Alright, Twilight. But remember, I’m here if you need to talk.”

At that moment, I heard Spike drop something behind me. “Oh, sorry! I... I must’ve dropped the bag with the vegetables,” he stammered, jumping down to pick everything up.

“Twilight, why don’t you go ahead and buy the apples from Applejack while I help Spike pick up the groceries?” Rarity suggested.

For a moment, I was confused. Why would Rarity help Spike and not me, especially when our groceries had fallen and she was ahead of us in line anyway? But then it dawned on me. She probably just wanted to help me out because she was worried. That was typical of Rarity, always so thoughtful. Yet, it left a strange feeling in me.

“Of course, I’ll go ahead,” I said, my voice carefully neutral as I walked away.

As I turned, I saw Rarity lean down to Spike, who was now nervously fumbling with a few tomatoes, as if unsure what to do with them. She whispered something I couldn’t hear, and Spike responded quietly, almost as if he was afraid I might overhear.

They’re talking about me.

I knew it. Why else would they whisper? A heavy feeling settled on my chest, like an invisible weight, but I shook it off. Not now. I had to keep going as if nothing had happened.

When I reached Applejack’s stand, she greeted me with her usual cheerfulness. She didn’t seem to notice anything unusual about me. “Howdy, partner,” she called with her typical hearty smile. “What can I do for you?” Proudly, she gestured to the shiny apples and fresh produce displayed at her stand.

“Hello, Applejack,” I greeted back, forcing a smile. That was what was expected of me, wasn’t it? “I’d like six of your sweetest apples.” I pointed to some of the bright red ones in her basket.

Applejack nodded approvingly. “You know what’s good, sugarcube,” she said, grabbing a paper bag and filling it with the apples. She held the bag out to me, and I enveloped it in my magic. Three coins floated out from my saddlebag toward her, but Applejack quickly raised a hoof to refuse them.

“Oh, Twilight,” Applejack said with a warm smile. “You’re my friend. The apples are on the house.”

My smile became a bit more genuine, and I thanked her. As I turned around, my eyes fell on Spike and Rarity, who had stopped whispering and were now grinning at me - almost too widely.

“Looks like you’ve picked everything up,” I commented as I approached them.

“Yeah, everything’s picked up,” Rarity replied, a little too quickly, as if trying to cover for herself. I didn’t think much of it, grabbed Spike, and said goodbye to her.

Back home, I neatly put away the groceries in the kitchen. It was almost soothing to be back in my own environment. The quiet of the library settled over me like a protective blanket. Finally, peace. I began to immerse myself in my usual daily routine. Spike had started dusting the books and tidying everything up. The library had opened by now, but it wasn’t like ponies often came here.

I sank into one of the comfortable armchairs and grabbed a book from one of the shelves. The world around me faded as I let myself fall back into the safety of my routine. But I had only just started reading the first pages when there was a knock at the door.

A knock? By now, I had learned to differentiate between visits. Was it someone coming to borrow a book? Probably not. No one needed to knock to enter the library. But ponies who thought of the building more as my home - they would knock.

I walked to the door and opened it, and there stood Rarity. Her smile was warm, as always, but there was something else in her gaze - something I couldn’t quite place.

“Twilight, darling,” she began softly. “I thought I’d stop by to make sure you’re alright.”

“I’m fine, Rarity,” I replied quickly. Why was she really here?

“I’m not interrupting, am I?” she asked, and without waiting for my answer, stepped over the threshold. She sat down on my couch in the main room and immediately began making small talk, as if it were the most natural thing in the world.

Why was she staying?

“So, darling, I hope I’m not interrupting anything,” she added, shifting slightly on the couch, as if making herself at home.

“I was just about to relax with a book, nothing special,” I replied, my tone a bit annoyed. “Rarity, what’s the real reason you’re here?” I asked, resigned.

Her smile became a little nervous. “Real reason?” she repeated. “Twilight, you’re being paranoid. What reason would I need to visit one of my closest friends?”

She batted her eyelashes innocently, as if trying to disperse the tension.

I saw through her charade. “This has nothing to do with what you whispered to Spike behind my back earlier, does it?” My voice was cool, almost cutting, and I could feel the air in the room grow heavier.

Rarity’s eyes widened, and I could see her smile start to crumble. She knew she had been caught. She began to sweat slightly, avoiding my gaze. “Nooo,” she drew out the word too long, her eyes darting around the room as if searching for an escape. “I have no idea what you’re talking about, darling.”

Just as I was about to press Rarity further, there was a second knock at the door. Rarity’s relief was obvious. She visibly exhaled, as if the unexpected visitor had saved her from answering.

“We’re not done here,” I muttered, giving her a scathing look, and went to the door.

When I opened it, it was none other than Applejack and Rainbow Dash. They stood there with strangely neutral expressions on their faces, as if they were here for a reason - a reason they didn’t want to say out loud, I suspected.

“Uh, hey Twilight,” Rainbow began, her voice unusually hesitant. “We thought we’d stop by, you know, to see how you’re doing.”

How I’m doing? My thoughts raced. Why were they suddenly so concerned? Didn’t Rarity come with the same excuse?

“I’m fine,” I said quickly, forcing myself to smile. “You don’t need to stay; I have... a lot to do.” My voice might have been too rushed, but I needed them to leave.

“Oh, come on, Twi,” Applejack replied, stepping into the doorway so I couldn’t close the door. “We’re just a bit worried. You work so much, and we thought you could use some company.”

Company? A part of me wanted to scream and throw them out. But I couldn’t afford that. Something wasn’t right here, but I didn’t know what it was yet.

“I appreciate it, really, but I... need some rest. You can come by another time,” I tried again, but none of them seemed to move. Why wouldn’t they leave?

My thoughts spun faster and faster. What did they really want? My stomach knotted as my eyes drifted to Rarity, who still sat on the couch, as if she were waiting for something. They had planned this, that much was certain.

With a sigh, I finally motioned for them to come in. “Alright, you can come in. Rarity’s already here,” I said. “What a coincidence, right?”

Rainbow laughed nervously, rubbing the back of her head. “Yeah, what a coincidence,” she said, but her voice sounded less convinced than she probably intended. Without further hesitation, she sat down next to Rarity on the couch.

Coincidence? Hardly. My eyes narrowed, and the unpleasant tingling in my stomach grew stronger. Why were they pretending everything was normal? I tried to calm myself, but the thought of them all being here, uninvited, made my heart beat faster.

“Does anyone want tea?” I asked the room, my voice trying to remain calm. Tea would help soothe my frayed nerves. Back in Canterlot, I always had tea with Celestia. It reminded me of when everything was still normal.

“What a lovely idea, darling,” Rarity said with a charming smile, standing up from the couch. “I’ll make us some tea right away.”

No. I couldn’t allow that. Before she could step further toward the kitchen, I caught her with my magic, gently but firmly guiding her back to her seat. “Rarity, you’re in my home,” I said coolly, my smile frozen in place. “I’m perfectly capable of making tea for all of us.”

Rarity blinked in surprise, her smile faltering for a moment. I had to maintain control. “So,” I asked, squinting slightly with a forced smile, “does anyone have a specific preference?”

The tension in the room was palpable as everyone hesitated briefly.

“I’ll take some of that cherry blossom tea you brought from Canterlot,” Rarity finally said in her usual elegant voice, trying to smooth over the tension.

Rainbow Dash just rolled her eyes and leaned back. “I’ll take whatever you have,” she said, sounding annoyed.

I turned to Applejack, who was the last to respond. “I’ll take some peppermint tea,” she said with a weak smile.

I went into the kitchen and put the kettle on. The familiar hiss of the water slowly coming to a boil should have been calming. But it wasn’t. They were watching me. Every move I made was being followed by their eyes, as if they were just waiting for me to make a mistake.

Is that what this is about? Are they here to watch me? To control me? Why else would they show up in the middle of the day, just to stare at me?

I grabbed the steaming kettle and poured the hot water into four cups, each with its respective teabag ready. Balancing the steaming cups with my magic, I slowly walked back into the living room.

They were still staring at me. “Here’s your tea,” I said with a forced smile as I placed the cups in front of them. Rarity was the first to reach for hers, thanking me politely before taking a sip. Her eyes seemed to pierce through me, and I could swear she was scrutinizing me, as if she saw something in me that I couldn’t.

Applejack took her cup and nodded gratefully, while Rainbow Dash grabbed hers without saying a word, leaning back in her seat.

I sat down in the open armchair across from them and took a sip of my own tea, feeling the heat of the liquid on my tongue. I closed my eyes and focused on the tea’s aroma. I could almost imagine myself back in Canterlot, sipping tea in the palace with the Princess. Princess, Princess.

When I opened my eyes again, I was met with the same concerned gazes from my friends as they stared at me.

“Twilight,” Rarity began after a short silence, her voice unusually soft, almost too gentle. “I... know you’ve been working hard, but we’re worried about you. Maybe you should take a break? You know, get some rest.” She took another sip of her tea and looked me over. “Your mane is looking a bit dull, and your eyes... they seem wild. Those are clear signs of stress,” she added matter-of-factly.

A break? What did they mean by that? Did they want me to stop working? To neglect my projects and responsibilities? Neglect Celestia’s tasks? Or was it something else? Did they just want to make sure I had no time alone? No time to think clearly?

“I... I’m fine,” I finally replied, my voice sounding almost apologetic. “It’s true that my studies have been stressing me out a bit, but... I’m a big girl. I can take care of myself.”

I tried to keep my smile intact, but inside, the pressure was rising.

“Are you sure, darling? I know how easy it is to get wrapped up in a project, but...” Rarity’s voice was suddenly cut off by an impatient groan from Rainbow Dash.

“Oh, come on,” Rainbow said, crossing her wings. “Why are we dancing around the issue?”

Applejack shot her a sharp look and stepped forward. “Rainbow,” she warned, “we agreed to be careful.” She glanced back at me, her eyes holding something more than she was letting on.

Careful? Of what? I felt my heart begin to race. What were they really talking about?

Rainbow rolled her eyes. “Oh, come on, Applejack. She knows something’s up.” Her voice had grown louder, almost demanding.

What was up? Why were they speaking in riddles? I started to hyperventilate.

Applejack avoided Rainbow’s demanding gaze and then looked at me with a forced smile. “Twilight, we just wanted to... well, make sure you’re okay.”

Okay? Why did they always question whether I was okay? What was it about me that bothered them so much? My stomach churned. “I’m fine,” I replied quickly, my voice sharper than I intended.

“Twilight, we can see that you’re...” Rarity began cautiously, but I cut her off.

“That I’m what? That I’m not always who you expect me to be? That I don’t fit into your image of me anymore?” My words came faster, harsher. I could feel the walls around me closing in. “Who do you think you are, coming here and deciding whether I’m okay or not?”

Rainbow Dash raised an eyebrow in surprise, while Applejack pawed the ground nervously. Rarity opened her mouth, but no words came out.

“You think you can just tell me what to do? Watch me? Control me?” My voice had grown louder, my breathing quicker. “You have no idea what’s going on inside me, and you just force yourselves on me without asking!”

Rarity tried to sound calming. “Twilight, that’s not what we...”

“Yes, it is! That’s exactly what this is! All of you! You just want to make sure I stay in control, that I don’t mess up because...” I stopped, my thoughts racing. Why, though?

Silence fell over the room. I could feel the tears in my eyes, but I couldn’t cry. Not in front of them.

“I need...” I took a deep breath. “I need time for myself. Alone.”

Applejack took a step toward me. “Twi, we just wanted to...”

“I said I want to be alone!” I screamed, squeezing my eyes shut. When I opened them again, I was alone in the library. I breathed slowly, in and out, trying to calm myself down. What was wrong with me?

Later that evening, I sat at my desk. The unease inside me didn’t subside. My thoughts swirled in my head, and every breath burned in my lungs, as if even breathing was too much.

“Spike,” I called through the quiet library. The soft scratching of his claws on the wooden floor signaled his arrival. “Yes, Twilight,” he said softly as he stood before me.

“Take a letter to the Princess,” I said and began to dictate, trying to form my chaotic thoughts into clear words.

Dear Princess Celestia,

Today, I had a meeting with some of my best friends - Rarity, Applejack, and Rainbow Dash. They seem to be worried about me and my well-being. Their concerns are unfounded, but they don’t seem to trust my judgment. All of this wouldn’t be so frustrating if they didn’t interfere so much in my life. I don’t know how to handle it.

Your faithful student,
Twilight Sparkle

After instructing Spike to send the letter, I leaned back and stared at the ceiling. At least Celestia would understand. She always had the answers, always knew what to do. I just had to wait for her response, and all my problems would go away.

A nervous giggle escaped my lips, and I licked my dry lips. Why hadn’t I thought of this sooner? Celestia always knew what to do. She would guide me, save me.

Suddenly, I heard the familiar sound of Spike belching up a letter and saw a scroll manifest from the green flames. My eyes widened, and my heart skipped a beat. Now, everything would be okay again.

My dear Twilight,

Thank you for your letter. I’m glad to hear that your friends care about you and your well-being. It is often the case that those closest to us can recognize when something is wrong, even if we may not see it ourselves right away. It’s a sign of their affection and concern.

I understand that it can sometimes feel uncomfortable when others try to help, but I encourage you to be open with your friends about your feelings. They have always supported you, and I’m sure they only want what’s best for you now. It’s important that you trust them, just as they trust you.

Remember, Twilight, that you are never alone. Your friends and I are always here for you if you need us. Trust in the strength of your friendship.

With warm regards,
Princess Celestia

I read the letter three times, carefully reviewing every word to make sure I hadn’t missed or misunderstood anything. But nothing changed. Celestia thinks I’m the problem? That I’m overreacting? She’s not taking my concerns seriously... and she’s placing the blame on my friends. The ones who want to control me, who won’t let me breathe!

A bitter laugh rose in my throat before I could stop it. It grew louder, uncontrollable, echoing through the empty shelves of the library. How could Celestia not see it?

“She trusts them... more than me,” I whispered between my laughter. My faithful teacher, whom I admired so much, seemed blind to what was really going on. How could they not see it?

The laughter intensified, tears welling up in my eyes. It was so absurd, so ironic. Celestia... had abandoned me. She had left me the day she sent me to Ponyville. She sent me here and placed me in the care of these ponies.

I stopped and felt my breathing quicken. Looking back, it all made sense. The Elements of Harmony... that’s all she wanted. Celestia needed me to make friends with these ponies to save her sister. And now? Now she was discarding me.

The feeling of betrayal grew inside me. Everything I had done had been to please her. And now? Now I was just a tool she no longer needed. My laughter grew louder, more intense, building to a crescendo as I slowly made my way to the bathroom.

I paused and stared at my reflection in the mirror. What I saw wasn’t a pretty sight. My eyes were red from crying, looking wild, as if the last bit of control was slipping away. My mane was disheveled, sticking out in all directions, unkempt and chaotic - just like I felt.

I lowered my gaze, and the laughter slowly turned into a stifled whimper. “Now, now... why are you crying?” A voice, soft and yet with a hint of mockery, echoed in my head.

I jerked my head up, staring into the mirror. There was no one there. No pony nearby. Just my reflection staring back at me, unchanged.

“Who said that?” I called out into the empty room, my voice trembling, hoping desperately for an answer. I looked around frantically, but the room was empty. No one was there. When I looked back into the mirror, it was... blank.

“Over here,” sang a voice as sweet as honey, one that was all too familiar. My own voice. I spun around and froze, staring at an exact copy of myself.

“What...?” I muttered, taking a step back. My heart raced. “That... that can’t be. Who are you? What are you?”

The copy smiled, a smile that was almost mocking. “Oh, Twilight,” she said, her voice so familiar and yet so foreign. “Do we really need to play this game? I’m you... or at least the Twilight you see yourself as.”

I stared at her, confused, unable to say anything.

“Look at you, Twilight. You’re weak, pathetic, broken.” The false Twilight slowly walked toward me, her eyes glittering with contempt. “No wonder Celestia is just letting you go. What did you expect? Did you think Celestia would need you forever?” She laughed coldly. “That she wouldn’t let you go when you were no longer useful?”

“You’re lying... that’s not true!” My voice quivered, and I felt the anger and despair rise within me. “Celestia hasn’t abandoned me, not really.”

“Really?” The false Twilight tilted her head to the side, looking at me intently, as if she were peering into my deepest thoughts. “Then why did she send you to Ponyville? Why isn’t she here to help you now?” Her voice dropped to a whisper. “She used you, Twilight. You were just a means to an end. The friends you made... they’re all part of her plan. You mean nothing to her anymore.”

“No!” I cried out, feeling my throat tighten. “She just wanted me to study the concept of friendship,” I said, weeping quietly. “I’m still her most faithful student.” My voice sounded defiant, but deep inside, it felt hollow.

The copy shook her head slowly as she circled around me, as if examining me. “Is that so? You’re doing a great job as a faithful student.” Her words were sharp as knives. “Didn’t you just send your friends away when they tried to help you? Is that how a faithful student acts?”

“Shut up!” I screamed at the false Twilight, my voice shaking with rage. “What do you know?”

“Exactly as much as you do, Twilight,” she replied calmly, her mocking smile unshaken. “After all, I am you.” She raised a hoof and mockingly stroked my cheek, as if in a gesture of false care. “Everything I say, you already know.”

Something inside me snapped. Without thinking, my hoof shot forward, and an ear-splitting crash filled the room. Seconds passed in a blur. Then I realized what I had done.

The bathroom mirror lay in shards, its fragments sparkling on the floor like tiny, sharp stars, and blood dripped from my hooves.

Author's Note

Chapter two. Hope you like it. We're ramping up the drama a bit.

I hope you like it, be sure to let me know your thoughts in the comments.