Celestia let out a heavy sigh to herself in an empty room. She had only raised the sun a few moments ago, and yet her schedule was already packed. It was all part of her routine: shower, breakfast, and then a seemingly endless amount of meetings and conferences and law-passing. Some days she wished for a new villain to pop up just so she’d have an excuse to not do anything.

But for now, before she had to go out and be the princess everypony expected her to be, she was alone in her room, enjoying the few precious moments that she could.

…Until a knock at her door took it all away from her.

“Few precious moments, indeed,” Celestia thought to herself. She took a moment to prepare herself to answer whoever was at the door, making sure she had a bright smile on her face when she opened the door.

“Good morning, Princess Celestia!” Derpy chirped, doing an awkward mix of a salute and a bow to her.

Celestia felt herself relax a little. It wasn’t a secretary stealing away her free time, just a mailmare that she could afford to be more casual with. “Good morning, Derpy. Is it time for the mail already?”

“You bet!” Derpy reached into her bag, pulling out a few letters and scrolls addressed to the princess directly. “Here you go!”

“Why, thank you!” Celestia’s smile was warm and genuine as she took her mail. She briefly looked over the letters, though nothing of dire importance stood out to her.

“Oh, and another special delivery for you, princess!” Derpy pulled out a large package wrapped in brown paper, far larger than what could fit in her mailbag.

“Oh, really?” Celestia took Derpy’s package with a look of confusion on her face. She mentally rewound through the past week, trying to remember if she ordered anything, but nothing came to mind. Maybe this was intended for Luna?

Derpy noticed Celestia looking at her box with concern, and she quickly started to worry. “Is something wrong, your highness?”

“No, it’s just…I don’t recall ordering anything recently…” Celestia answered, still examining the box, though nothing about it particularly stood out.

“Oh, well, maybe it’s a gift!”

Celestia ran through her mental catalog, thinking of whether or not today or any future dates were a cause to give a gift aside from a VERY early Hearth’s Warming. Though she supposed that it just being a random present wasn’t so far-fetched.

She ripped open the wrapping, and both of their expressions changed in an instant.

“Oh.”

The unassuming wrapping was a very needed cover, as the box underneath was a brightly colored, eye-catching packaging for a dildo.

Celestia stared at the box as the blush shot to her cheeks, wondering what sort of message was meant to be sent by this package.

Meanwhile, Derpy was looking at the dimensions, impressed and a little envious that Celestia ordered such a massively sized one.

Celestia opened her mouth several times, trying to start a sentence, but just being too dumbfounded to go past the first syllable. It truly was too early in the morning to deal with this.

Derpy tried to break the awkward silence. “Um…Wow, princess! That must be a really…good…fit for you!”

“I…huh…” Celestia picked up the torn paper, trying to find the shipping information. This had to be some sort of prank, or possibly a very bold proposal.

Derpy tried to get a closer look at the box. “Ooh, these are the really high-quality ones! Almost as good as the real thing! Er, s-so I’m told!”

Princess Celestia looked at the label more closely. “Um…Derpy? I don’t think I was the intended recipient of this…package.”

Derpy’s heart skipped a beat in her chest. “A-Are you sure?”

Celestia showed Derpy the shipping label, particularly the cutie mark drawing for who to deliver it to. It was a drawing of a sun, but it wasn’t quite the same as the one on Celestia’s flank. This sun only had a few rays radiating from it, and was adorned with blue stars.

“I believe this was meant to go to Sunburst’s house…” Celestia said, pointing to the other part of the label that said Crystal Empire.

Derpy looked back and forth between Celestia’s cutie mark and the cutie mark drawn on the paper, her blush of shock got deeper with embarrassment. “Oh no! I’m so sorry, Princess Celestia! I messed up again!”

Celestia could see the poor mare starting to panic, so she lifted up Derpy’s chin with her hoof. “It’s alright, Derpy.”

“R…Really?”

Celestia nodded. “It was a bit of a shock, but this is definitely a memorable start to my morning,” she said with a giggle.

Derpy looked up at Celestia, the princess’s smile just felt so kind, so warm, so genuine.

Celestia looked back, grabbing some unused scrolls from her room. “Here, we can use this as the new wrapping paper.”

“Oh, you don’t have to do that, your highness! I’m sure you’re busy enough without needing to help me!” Derpy nervously laughed, modestly trying to back away.

“Well, we certainly can’t just leave it out in the open like that while you deliver it! What would Sunburst think?” Celestia gave Derpy a quill and ink. “Here, you rewrite the label and I’ll make the wrapping.”

“Um, y-yes, your highness!”

As Derpy got to work, Celestia took the time to look at the package. She saw the box was big, but looking at the details made her eyes widen a touch. “Hm…Sunburst is quite…ambitious to be ordering one of this size…”

“And lucky…” Derpy said without thinking. “I-I mean, because he can use it right away! And we still have to wait a couple more weeks…heh heh…”

Celestia flashed a sly grin. “Thinking of ordering one for yourself later on, Derpy?”

Derpy started to get more flustered. “Oh! No no no no no! That one’s far bigger than what I could take!”

“Ah, I see. You’ve been eyeing one of the smaller models then?”

“Mmhm! I really like them, they feel nice and they’re easy to clean and-” Derpy paused, realizing what sort of conversation she was having, and who she was having the conversation with.

“Well! What a glowing and candid review!” Celestia found it hard not to let out a giggle. “Maybe next time I see this, it’ll actually be meant for me!”

With a seemingly never-ending burning blush on Derpy’s cheeks, Derpy and Celestia wrapped up the box and slapped a brand new label on it.

“There! Like I never opened it in the first place!” Celestia said, admiring her quick work. “You better get it to Sunburst fast, I’m sure he needs it more than I do.”

“Oh, you’re a lifesaver, Princess Celestia!” Derpy sighed with relief. “Thank you so so so much!”

“You’re quite welcome, but I’ve still got plenty of meetings and I’m sure you still have plenty of mail to deliver. However, this was a fun little distraction for a while, so thank you too, Derpy.”

Derpy let out an awkward nervous laugh, cheeks still blushing hard as she took the package back.

“Oh, and Derpy?” Celestia called out before the mailmare left on her duties.

“Y-Yes?”

“When you get the chance, I’d love to learn more about what sort of ‘model’ you’d like the best…”

Coloratura sat down at the top of a hill underneath an apple tree, quietly humming to herself as the brisk autumn air blew through her mane.

There wasn’t much to do up there at this part of Sweet Apple Acres except admire the scenery, though Coloratura was hoping to do something more than just sit all alone.

Thankfully, she didn’t have to wait much longer before Applejack climbed the hill to join her.

“Heh…Sorry for the wait,” Applejack chuckled, wiping the sweat off her forehead as she sat down next to her.

“Took you long enough,” Coloratura giggled. “We rarely get to hang out, and when I finally come over to visit, you’d rather be doing chores instead of being with your friend.”

“Well, ain’t my fault there’s stuff that needs to get done,” Applejack rolled her eyes. “We’ve had to practically double work ever since Big Mac took a bunch of cider barrels for his party with the other boys.”

“Typical AJ,” Coloratura smiled softly, “just as much of a workaholic as ever…”

Applejack wrapped her hoof around the other mare. “Hey, I said I was done, right? Got the whole rest of the day to enjoy doing nothin’ together.”

Coloratura leaned onto Applejack’s shoulder. “That does sound pretty nice…”

“Ya know, it’s been forever and a day since we actually got to talk to each other face to face,” Applejack pointed out. “It’s nice being able to catch up without waiting for a spell to hear back.”

“Mmhm! Was there anything you wanted to hear about?”

“Well, any luck on your quest for your muse?”

Coloratura let out a heavy sigh. “Ugh, not yet. I’ve been trying forever to feel inspired again, but nothing…”

Applejack slowly patted her on the back to console her. “Well, somethin’ll come to ya eventually. Ah’m sure you’ll find something that’ll make your heart start singin’ again!”

“I hope so. I miss having that creative spark in me; being able to write, sing, record, perform! I miss touring and performing on stage and meeting all my fans and all the complications that happen between shows!”

“Now who’s being a workaholic?” Applejack chuckled.

“Ehehe, it’s just what I love!”

“Is that why you said yes to my invitation?” Applejack teased, playfully jabbing Coloratura’s ribs. “You think some wild and crazy barnyard lovin’s gonna get ya in the singing mood?”

Coloratura turned away and blushed as she giggled, indicating that Applejack’s joke wasn’t entirely unfounded. “Well, no, I would’ve still joined even if I was writing songs. I’m not gonna turn down an invitation from you, AJ! Especially not for this!” she softly laughed. “Though being here in Ponyville and chatting with your friends is a nice change of pace. Maybe that’s just what I need.”

“Heh, here’s hopin’ ya make it back on stage soon, Rara.”

Coloratura looked at her friend with a coy smile. “Actually…you might not have to wait that much longer.”

Applejack tilted her head. “Whaddya mean?”

“Well, your friend Trixie actually invited me to take part in her performance! It’s not exactly what I’m used to, but a low-stakes performance for your town might be fun!”

“Tch! Knowing Trixie, that mare’s probably blabbing to everyone she knows that she’s got the mega superstar Coloratura performing with her,” Applejack scoffed.

“Well, I’d still love it if you’d come. If you’re not too busy working, that is,” Coloratura giggled.

“You kiddin’?” Applejack pulled her friend in for a hug. “Ah wouldn’t miss it for the world.”

Author's Note

Sure the big dildos are fun but you have to hide that shit meticulously from any friends/family/roommates, not to mention the discrete cleaning after each use!

...So I've been told.