The Agents of SMILE and the Case of the White Rabbit

It was early one morning, and Sweetie Drops was slowly waking up as the sun rose, worried her heart throbbing. She turned to see her mare friend laying on her bed, looking as beautiful as she had ever been, with her light teal and white striped mane gently waving over her horn. Sweetie Drops couldn’t help but admire her and just feel so content being in the moment with her love. But there was also a somber silence as she looked upon her mare friend, knowing she was about to embark on a journey to become an agent of SMILE. Despite her being thrilled about the prospect of Lyra working alongside her, there was so much danger and commitment that she wasn’t sure Lyra was prepared for. Deep down Sweetie Drops knew that the main reason Lyra ever even considered joining the Agency was because of her, and she was still feeling skeptical of the entire idea. As Sweetie Drops lay there worrying, Lyra suddenly bounced off the bed, threw her hooves up, and squealed, “Today’s the day!”

“Yeah, I know,” Sweetie Drops mumbled as she got up as well wishing she could just lay in bed with Lyra for just a bit longer. Regardless Lyra's first day of training was today, and she had to escort her to S.M.I.L.E headquarters. They then both started to get ready for the day, as they both took a shower together while making out, brushed their teeth together, ate a light breakfast of cornflakes, and drank orange juice together. Then they both started to get dressed into their suits. They slipped on long sleeved dress shirts and ties, while slipping on black coats. Within the Agency of S.M.I.L.E agents were all given a typical suit and tie; however, they didn’t have to wear them most of the time except for formal occasions. As Sweetie Drops finished getting into her outfit, she looked over at Lyra and couldn't help but admire how spiffy Lyra looked in her suit. She then trotted over and adjust her marefriend's tie and said, “now remember, while we're in the Agency, we need to set some ground rules.”

Lyra rolled her eyes and said, “I know we talked about this before, not mentioning we know each other, remember my manners, and be a good little filly.”

Sweetie Drops nudged her with a hoof and said, “Don’t be such a smartass.”

Lyra snickered and nudged back. “I won’t, I know how important this is, and I promise no pony will know about us. I’ve kept our relationship a secret this far. As far as any pony knows were just friends."

Sweetie Drops nuzzled her back as she whispered, “I know you will, I just worry about you, that's all.”

“Whatever, worry wart now come on I don't want to be late on my first day,” Lyra teased back as she nudged her back, and then they both trotted off together to the sewer grate, pressing the runes; the two slipped on their sunglasses, and in a blink of an eye, they were now an agency of SMILE. As they went through the halls, Lyra’s eyes were aglow as she looked around the crazy magical creatures and waved a hoof at the various other agents, who gave them odd looks but waved back. Sweetie Drops blushed a little, feeling a bit embarrassed by her mare friend’s behavior, but she didn’t want to discourage Lyra from making friends within the Agency seeing how she was really quite the social butterfly. They continued to trot to Lyra's assigned room, and as they entered a massive classroom and as they did Lyra turned to Sweetie Drops and waved a hoof as her mare friend waved back, and the doors were closed behind her. The agent then began to trot back down the hall and try to calm her nerves as she took deep breaths to calm her nerves hoping to relax for a bit seeing that Twilight and her friends in town what can possibly go wrong?

One day later…

Mayor Mare was coming home from another long day at work, completely exhausted. She was tired, with bags under her eyes, and she looked like she hadn’t got a wink of sleep the previous night as she sat down to read a book. As she opened it and began to read her novel about two farmers finding a goose that can lay golden eggs. It got rather good with the farmers hoarding the eggs and spending them on lavish gifts and becoming greedy. Then, without warning, a plump golden-brown goose suddenly appeared in her living room, honking and flapping its wings. The mayor was a bit stunned by its presence, and there it blinked and let out a honk as it flapped its wings.

The earth pony was somewhat confused, looking around. Surely this goose didn’t appear out of thin air? The mayor was a bit dazed by the creature and then looked at it closely as it laid an egg with a thump as it landed in the middle of her couch. The earth pony then slowly picked it up and held it to get a better look, but there it was, plain as day. She would have to get it tested for purity, but then the goose got up, wiggling her butt, and hooked, “Morning.”

“Morning,” the mare replied back with a confused expression on her face.

She looked around and said, “This is a lovely place you have, and I’m sorry for coming to you rather suddenly.”

“Well, you're quite articulate for a goose; where did you come from!?”

The goose placed a wing over her chest, “Goodness me, where are my matters! I am The Golden Goose!”

“Yes, I assumed that being the case” As the tan-brown earth pony looked over at the golden egg now sitting on her couch.

“Well, yes, I was with a lovely family, giving them my golden eggs and being fed grapes, but now I’m here? How odd?” she looked around. But I assured her, “But I assure you I will not intrude on your hospitality. I, as you see, lay golden eggs. I will pay you, of course, and you can sell them. All I ask in return is that I have a nice place to nest.”

“Of course!?” the mayor replied, being rather stunned not only by the fact that the goose could talk but also by how well-mannered it seemed. The mayor then took it and began to clear out a guest room. He placed it down in the middle of the room, and she nestled herself into the middle of the blankets and pillows.

The golden goose then nestled herself between the pillows and blankets and let out a relaxed sigh, “That is just wonderful.”

“Yes, I can only assume so,” the mare replied as she saw the Goose already laying another egg. “This is quite a lovely home I think I might just stay here for a while."

“My pleasure, but I…uh... I have some things to do,” The mayor then began to slowly walk out of the room, and she heard the goose squawk. “If you're going to test my egg to see if it's real, I assure you my eggs are 24-karat gold!”

“Yes, but I just have to make sure…just keep yourself comfortable,” the mayor squeaked as she came over, picking up the egg, off her couch and grunting a bit seeing it was quite heavy and holding it close to her face, and eyeing it as it glinted in the sunlight.

The mayor then took the egg to a nearby bank and got it weighed and inspected, and like the goose said, it was confirmed to get a rating of 24 karats…this thing was worth thousands of bits. As The mayor mare went back home, her thoughts went through her mind as she could sell it to any bank…though there will be questions on how she required it, maybe she can say it’s some old heirloom she had left and didn’t know about. As she returned home, she found her goose nestled in the makeshift nest, and she decided to first make the room “goose-friendly.” Over the next few days, she covered the entire floor with grass and crafted a makeshift pond filled with water for her to swim in.

One morning as the mayor was feeding her some breakfast a bowl of peas and lentils for it. She couldn't help but admire the goose nestled in a massive nest filled with soft cushions and surrounded by reeds as she was just lying there without a care in the world looking absolutely gorgeous. She then trotted over and sat next to it, stroking its feathers as it continued to plop out the massive eggs. Despite wanting to be a good host to her new roommate, the thoughts of how she could use all these golden eggs started to go through her mind. She thought about the dozens of restoration projects for the town, refurbishing city hall and the school, and maybe even using these extra funds to develop a theme park!? Then what about herself? She can start getting a bigger home for herself, maybe getting into the classier side of things so she can start making waves in Canterlot. The possibilities were endless, and all she had to do was keep this golden goose. It was hers and no one else’s.

One week later…

Princess Celestia was in her chariot on her way to Ponyville, where she was supposed to have a “story hour” with some sick foals many ponies would say such a thing was beneath her, but it was the least she can do for her most vulnerable subjects knowing full well some have life threatening illnesses. It broke her heart knowing foals having to spend their first years of life cooped up in a hospital the least she could do is read to them and know that she cares for them. As the princess was making her way to the hospital, she thought about how lovely Ponyville was and couldn’t help but agree with Twilight’s decision for staying here, watching ponies trotting along of all kinds, she then saw some earth pony foals playing with both unicorns and pegasi. Ponyville was a melting pot of all kinds of ponies, and it seemed so much more welcoming compared to Canterlot which can be so stifling with snobbish nobles. As she approached the hospital ponies trotted by, some started to move out of the way and bowed. She gently waved a hoof, trying to make this as casual as possible. It was nice to get out of the castle from time to time and not be treated as royalty. Then she spotted Nurse Redheart thie white coated earth pony trotted over as she looked up and greeted the Princess outside, smiling and waving a hoof. “Good morning, princess!”

“Good Morning to you as well Nurse Redheart; how are you today?”

The white-coated earth pony bounded over and cried rather excitedly, “Oh, it's a lovely morning! I'm so happy you decided to come read to the young foals today.”

“Of course, I always feel horrible that these foals have to sit in a hospital bed all day. It’s the least I can do to make their days just a bit brighter."

"I am happy you decided to make the trip down here every month. You bring so much joy to these foals. And the extra funds you bring do help though it's quite unnecessary."

Princess Celestia blushed seeing her guards hosting a big bag of bits into the hospital. "I know they're well taken care of but I just can't help myself. Just use the bits to give them new toys or throw them parties."

"Oh, we do Princess, we all do appreciate your generosity."

As they talked the princess trotted into the hospital room, seeing the sick foals all with their eyes glowing. As she approached, it touched her heart to see them, and they all started to get excited, shouting her name. Nurse Redheart cleared her throat, “Now, I know you're all excited to see the princess, but please try to be on your best behavior.”

“Yes, Nurse Redheart.” The foals mumbled as Princess Celestia chuckled. "it's alright, please just relax if you have any questions for me, please hold them until after story time."

"Yes, Princess Celestia," the foals chimed together.

The princess then sat down and started to read to them, and they all got quiet. They tried to pay attention, and she began to read the story chosen for her. The book was about a Mother Goose reading stories to a group of baby ducklings. It was a cute little tail and rather charming. As she read, the princess started to feel her eyesight failing for some odd reason, then she blinked as she was now suddenly looking through a pair of glasses, then as she got up, she turned to see her backside resembled that of a goose and looked around to see she was in a small quaint little cottage with a group of ducklings all sleeping nestled into each other.

The princess was rather stunned being unsure how she ended up as a goose and in this cottage? She then slowly got up, turned to see a mirror, and saw her own reflection, benign that of an old mother goose with pure white feathers, a bright yellow bonnet tied around her head, and glasses sitting on her beak. She blinked as if her mind was starting to grow fuzzy. Was she a princess of ponies!? How silly! She must’ve been reading too many stories about ponies and princesses. She just chuckled to herself as she gently waddled out of the room, trying not to wake the sleeping ducklings napping around her. She poured herself a cup of tea and then waddled back to her nest and nestled into it, sipping her tea. It wasn’t long until the mother goose started to nod off and gently drifted off to sleep as well.

A few months later…

Sweetie Drops was standing outside the same classroom she escorted Lyra to months ago, looking somewhat agitated. Right now, her marefriend was taking her final exam and it was nerve-wracking waiting to see if she passed or not. But then the doors swung open and a dozen ponies came out some looking happy others downtrodden she peeked her head over the crowd then saw Lyra was stumbling out of the doors, looking just as nerve wracked as she was. But then the teal-colored unicorn threw her hooves around Sweetie Drops and squealed, “I just passed the written part!”

“That’s awesome!” Sweetie Drops cried, hugging her marefriend and trying to hold back tears of joy.

The two then trotted across the way towards a massive arena, where the area was padded with a circle drawn in the center. There were a few bleachers surrounding the small arena, with ponies sitting down and chatting as they all anticipated seeing who would show up. Sweetie Drops gazed at it briefly, reminiscing about all the bouts she had performed here while she was just a trainee. Lyra then started to undress taking off her suit and tie as Sweetie Drops wondered who the proctor for this challenge would be. She then heard leather wings flapping, and she looked up. Her eyes lit up as she saw Emerald Breath wearing a black belt around his waist. The agent could feel herself becoming a bit concerned, seeing Emerald Breath was one of the Agency's best combatants. She turned to see Lyra, standing on her hindlegs and rolling back her shoulders, and whispered, “Lyra, are you sure you can beat him?”

The unicorn turned to her opponent and snickered, “Oh yeah! Emerald Breath, he’s good, but I can take him.”

She then hopped into the circle with Emerald smirking and asked, “So Lyra, are you ready for your combat exam?”

“Oh, you know it!?” Lyra replied with a smirk as she stood up on her hindlegs and took a stance.

Emerald smirked as he snorted some fire from his nostrils, then said, “In this exam, we will test everything I've taught you. You must be able to pin me down for ten seconds, throw me out of the ring, or knock me unconscious before I do the same to you.”

“Just bring it on! I can take you!”

“Now, when we spared before, but that was training, this time I will not hold back,” Emerald snapped as she shifted onto his hindlegs and performing a martial arts pose.

Sweetie Drops then watched as the two started their fight. They both ran at each other and started to block, attack, and evade, being able to keep up with each other. Sweetie Drops was impressed with how well Lyra was able to block Emerald’s attacks with other agents on the sidelines, watching the two really get into the thick of battle. It seemed that Emerald was constantly keeping Lyra on the defensive. But the unicorn was able to sweep the half-dragon off his hooves and then grappled him to the ground and was able to pin him down. Emerald twisted and snorted flames from his mouth and nostrils but could do nothing but squirm, trying to break free. But Lyra got him into a good pin, and he could do nothing for ten seconds, so he was declared the winner.

After the two got up, Emerald looked rather ashamed, his ego clearly bruising, and grumbled, “I have to admit you are good.”

Sweetie Drops saw that her marefriend wasn’t looking too good herself; she looked rather worn out, sweating, and a bit bruised. She admitted, “Yeah, you too. You almost got me there.”

The two bowed, and Emerald flew off, still fuming a bit from his loss. The mare trotted back with a smile, and Sweetie Drops threw her into another hug. “Oh, my Faust! I can’t believe you actually beat him! No one beats Emerald!?”

“Yeah, I was honestly a bit scared he was going to get me out of the ring, but he was getting a bit reckless there, and I just took advantage of that,” Lyra admitted.

“Oh stop, you won fair and square.”

“Well, don’t go congratulating me yet. There’s still one more trial left. It's time for the practical part of the exam.”

Sweetie Drops nudged her, “You forget I’ll be mentoring you during it. All you have to do is deal with a Class F creature or artifact, easy peasy.”

“Right, Class F,” Lyra mumbled, seeming disappointed.

Sweetie Drops nodded and said, “Right, you won’t be going after anything too dangerous until you climb the ranks. Right now, you're just a trainee. Once you go on a few missions, you’ll hit Secret Agent class, and then we can go on really cool missions.”

“Talking about cool missions, did anything interesting happen while I was gone?”

Sweetie Drops shook her head, “No,” and said, “Nope. Twilight and her friends have been dealing with the odd monster here and there, a parasprite infestation, an Ursa Minor, a dragon, but other than that, this has to be the most relaxing few weeks as an agent since being assigned to Ponyville.”

“That’s good to hear, but we must meet with Alice, so I uh better take a shower I smell awful."

“Right, come on!” Sweetie Drops took her and escorted her to the locker room nearby.

After getting washed up and dressed back into her suit, Lyra and Sweetie Drops were now in front of Head Agent Alice’s office. The old mare was slowly going over some forms and she seemed rather impressed as she said, “Well, I have to admit, I haven’t had such amazing scores on our written exam since Sweetie Drops finished her training.” The mare replied as she turned to Lyra, who snapped a salute, “I appreciate your confidence in me, mam!”

“Also, I have to say we are more than confident in your physical prowess, pinning down Emerald Breath that hasn’t been done ever.”

“Again, thank you.”

“But now we’re here for your practical exam; you will be assigned under Agent Sweetie Drops’ and will go on your first mission with her as your mentor and proctor. Now, I assume you know Ponyville pretty well?”

“Yes, mam! I've lived there for the past few years since moving from Canterlot.”

The mare nodded and said, “Yes, I am well aware of your history. For your practical exam, it’s come to our attention that the mayor of Ponyville has acquired a mysterious magical creature or artifact, which has given her incredible wealth.”

Sweetie Drops nodded and said, “I’ve been the one keeping tabs. At first, it was just rather amazing seeing so many public buildings being repaired so fast, however I grew concerned seeing the public parks became filled with expensive flowers and ornate statues. Then the mayor moved into a mansion! At first, I thought she was embezzling funds, but no, her finances were all in order. In fact, I learned she’s gained all this wealth selling mysterious golden eggs.”

Lyra let out a snicker, “You're joking.”

“I’m serious; we have had reports of bankers in Manehattan and Canterlot being sold golden eggs for thousands of bits.”

Alice took out a small book and laid it on her desk. Then she said, “Yes, I believe she has acquired the Goose that lays golden eggs, just like in the fairy tale of two farmers finding one and almost ruining their lives because they were blinded by their greed. I know it sounds silly but let me tell you that most fairy tales have some truth to them.”

Lyra became stoic again, learning much in her classes about how all those silly legends you heard about as a filly had a kernel of truth, which unnerved her a bit. Some were rather unnerving, like the Headless Horse, Frakenstallion, or Count Appleblood, and she said, " Yes, I understand.”

“Your mission is simple: we need to confiscate the goose and the eggs and, if need be, erase the memories from the mayor of ever owning the Goose. The Mayor can keep the bits she has now, but we can alter her memories to think that she inherited her wealth from a great-aunt or something. I’ll leave you to think of a good cover story. I already had agents confiscate the golden eggs from the banks Sweetie Drops provided in her report.”

Lyra looked shaken by the last sentence but maintained her stoicism and said, “Yes, mam!”

“Well, despite this being a test, this is an official mission, and Agent Sweetie Drops will be the one observing you on your mission. Once completed, Sweetie Drops will give me an assessment of your conduct during the mission, and I will make a final determination if you pass and will officially become an agent. Understand?”

“Yes, mam!”

“Now before you leave, you need a codename."

Lyra blushed and said, "well as cool as a codename would be I would rather keep my name since I want to stay as an agent in Ponyville."

Sweetie Drops felt a cold sweat form on her brow as Alice eyed the new agent and said, "now, we usually don’t allow agents to stay in their hometowns; too many ponies know them, and it can lead to interpersonal conflicts. But, I can make for an exception in your case. Seeing that Ponyville has been a hotbed of incidents of late, and despite Twilight and her friends solving most of them it only makes protecting them from unknown threats our highest priority."

"Thank you, mam!" Alice exclaimed. As Alice signed her Name and Codename as Lyra Heartstrings. Alice then stood up and said, "You have your mission and your orders; please return once the mission has been completed."

"Yes mam!" The two agents chimed back and then the two set off down the hall. Sweetie Drops was still rather shaken but excited to see that Alice was allowing Lyra to stay In Ponyville. She then turned to see Lyra looking somewhat nervous as she scratched the back of her head and said, “I understand erasing memories can help prevent trauma, but is that really necessary? I mean, we don’t really have to erase the Mayor’s memories and implant fake ones?”

“Well, sometimes, this is better. We don’t know how much influence this goose has on the mayor, and it could be corrupting her. If so, erasing her memories will make it easier for her to move on while we study the goose and ensure it isn’t a danger to Equestria.”

Lyra looked up and asked, “But what if this goose isn’t that bad, too? Maybe we’re jumping the gun here.”

“We could be, but that’s why Alice is letting us make that decision on the matter. This is why it doesn’t matter how good you are at combat or how smart you are. Making these moral decisions in the field means being an agent of S.M.I.L.E.”

“Alright, well, I’m ready to do this! And you better not let me pass just because we’re marefriends!” Lyra replied.

“Trust me, I’m going to grade you as an Agent and will put my personal feelings for you aside, regardless I think you’re going to be fine,” Sweetie Drops replied as they gave each other a hoof bump. The two both hopped onto the teleporter and were sent back to Ponyville.