A Starlit Rainbow

CHAPTER 1

“In a refrigerator? Are you bucking KIDDING ME?”

Twilight collapsed and rolled around on the carpet in a fit of laughter, as her and Rainbow's weekly book meeting descended into a long-winded discussion on how much the final instalment of the long-running Daring Do series either sucked (in Rainbow's opinion) or wasn't “all that bad” (in Twilight's). Needless to say, their argument had soon descended into madness, and Rainbow's hyperbolic hatred of the book was one of the most hilarious displays of butthurt fangirlism that Twilight had seen in her lifetime. And being an unabashed and self-admitted bookworm, she'd seen more than a few.

“And aliens, Twilight! Aliens!” Rainbow Dash continued, standing on her hind legs, and making comically exaggerated arm and wing motions to illustrate her point. “Daring Do is all about ancient artefacts, trap-ridden temples and malicious monsters, both pony and otherwise – it's NOT about nuking fridges and finding dimensional portals!”

Twilight sat up on her haunches and rolled her eyes. “Daring Do is supposed to be light-hearted, madcap fun, and the Land of the Diamond Spine was just that; it was enjoyable, if a little mindless and ridiculous – but when has Daring ever NOT been mindless and ridiculous?” This earned a slight glare and a huff from the ever-indignant Rainbow, prompting Twilight to correct herself; “I mean, that's not to say that they aren't great fun to read; they are, and that's something that's always been a staple feature of the series...”

Rainbow let out a small smirk at that, and sighed. “Y'know Twi, you sound like a professional arts critic and I sound like a ranting mega-fan who's read one too many fanfics.” Twilight responded with a giggle.

“Correction, Rainbow; I AM a professional arts critic, and you ARE a ranting mega-fan who's read one too many fanfics.” She winked.

Rainbow smiled back, and without warning, crouched and pounced on the unprepared Twilight, who let out a surprised squeal and immediately toppled backwards under the force of Rainbow's glomp – as the cyan mare jammed her forehooves into Twilight's belly and began to tickle mercilessly.

“And... GAH! Probably some... HAHAHA... weird clopfics... too!”

At that, Rainbow pulled back, suddenly uncharacteristically bashful and sporting the beginnings of a slight blush;

“Twi... you promised never to talk about that...”

“Hey, it's okay; the way I see it, it's just one less secret between us – and at least you know what you like, right?”

The purple mare smiled and winked at her still-blushing pegasus friend, who wore a puzzled expression as she tried to piece together the implications of what Twilight had just said. Instead of bothering too much with pragmatics, she smiled back and spoke softly;

“Y'know, Twi... it's great to have someone as crazy as me to talk about all of this stuff with. If I'd have come out as a book-lover in flight camp I would have been totally ribbed for it, but you're... accepting. It's nice.”

Twilight blushed a little at this, and let her eyes remain focused on the pegasus for a few moments, still smiling warmly.

“Rainbow, I...”

She cleared her throat, suddenly slightly more attentive and aware – and mentally kicked herself for staring at Rainbow again. She'd been doing that all too often recently, especially seeing as Dash's visits to the library had become all the more frequent of late now that she'd expanded her range of reading.

Daring Do still remained the main point of their discussions, though.

“Yes, Twilight?”

Oh, god, I just looked at her flank. Why the hell did I just look at her flank?

“Twilight?” Rainbow questioned, now wearing a slightly more confused expression at her friend's apparent vacancy. She saw Twilight looking at something that appeared to be behind her, and quickly turned her head, attempting to find the object of the purple mare's attention.

Twilight had, by this point, long since zoned out and was having a small internal argument about whether or not she should be staring at Rainbow's flank. The pegasus' sudden movement snapped her out of her trance, and she stumbled with her words, unable to think of anything to say.

“Uh... I... um...”

“Are you okay, Twilight? You just kinda spaced for a moment there – I was starting to get a little worried-”

“I'm fine!” Twilight blurted suspiciously enthusiastically, cutting Rainbow off mid-sentence. After a small, awkward moment of neither party knowing quite what to say, the silence was broken by a convenient intrusion from Spike, who bursted through the door with enough speed to skid to a halt in front of the two ponies. Clearly exhausted from what was likely to have been a hurried dash home, (or the closest was to “running” that the slightly pudgy dragon could possibly muster) he reached up to wipe the sweat off his brow, and thrusted a large brown book into Twilight's forehooves.

“I just... *gasp*... picked this up from the... *pant*... Post Office and...”

Twilight scanned over the front cover of the book briefly; it was a large, old-looking tome, adorned with the image of a pair of pegasus wings. Despite obviously being of considerable age, it didn't look as though it'd seen all that much usage – and its bold, gold-encrusted title still shone in the sunlight.

“Pegasine Anatomy and Magical Theory, Twilight! One 'nearly-new' copy, fresh from the rarely-visited vaults of a Canterlot-based research repository – and I even managed to get it at a discounted price!”

Upon examining the tome closer, Twilight spotted that it was indeed in virtually mint condition, and

“Wow, Spike! This is incredible – I'm surprised you remembered that I'd ever said anything about this book in the first place; it's so obscure...”

“So,” Rainbow Dash interjected, “is anyone going to tell me what this book is all about, or-”

“Of course, Rainbow Dash – in fact, I need you for some of the experiments in this... Oh, this is going to be so much fun!” Twilight said gleefully, rubbing her hooves together and grinning madly.

Upon hearing the word “experiment”, Rainbow Dash visibly twitched, and began to back away slowly from Twilight, her mind starting to fill with horrifying images of needles, electrodes and dank cellars full of strange fluids and machinery – and she pictured Twilight in a blood-splattered lab-coat, steampunk goggles and a medical mask, laughing manically as she twirled a thick black moustache with a forehoof.

Don't be ridiculous, Dash thought; she probably only wants to measure my flight speed or something, (and besides, the moustached mad scientist is probably more Pinkie's style, if I'm honest) and hey, I wouldn't say no to having an excuse to hang out with her some more.

Wait, why did I just think that?

Noticing Rainbow's obvious discomfort, Twilight spoke once more; “Rainbow, don't worry; it'll probably only involve me measuring your flight speed or something, and besides, it gives us a great excuse to hang out some more...”

Wait, why did I just say that?

There was another brief lull in the conversation, and Rainbow though it best to break the tension and go kick a few clouds. Excusing herself, she flew out through an open window and rocketed into the skies – but instead of the usual feeling of adrenaline and elation that kicked in every time she took off, her thoughts were filled with confusion and frustration; there was an indescribable feeling of angst and aching deep in her chest, and her mind whirred and whirled over Twilight's words and her own thoughts:

“...  it's just one less secret between us...”

Rainbow replied with another memory; “...you're... accepting. It's nice.”

“... it gives us a great excuse to hang out some more...”

Dash pumped her wings harder, slicing through thick, white clouds as she ascended into the sky, lost inside the brightness of the sun and the noise of her own imagination – and she closed her eyes, wishing the world away as the horizons rolled endlessly beneath her hooves.

• ~ -

“You're sure?”

“... Certain.”

The alabaster alicorn sighed solemnly, turning to her sister with a grim, forlorn expression. She bowed her head slowly and closed her eyes, and though she remained completely still, her mane and tail continued to flow steadily in an intangible breeze. She drew a short breath, and began to speak again;

“If your premonition proves to be correct, Luna, then dark times lie ahead. I hope you're aware of that; if what she said was true, then we've no reason not to fear the worst.”

Luna lifted her head towards the clouds and stepped further out onto the balcony, gazing into the gleaming azure skies and inhaling the warm, late-summer air. An unusual wave of coldness swept over her suddenly, and she shivered slightly, tearing her vision away from the vast blue emptiness and landing her gaze on her sister. She replied;

“She seemed terrified, sister. That was the most awful thing; seeing Nightmare Moon genuinely scared. Nightmare Moon is a creature who manifested by leeching from the darkest corners of my imagination; she's almost literally a nightmare – and for something to scare her...”

“... Then it must be of such a true and pure evil that even a phantom as sickening as Nightmare Moon can't begin to comprehend the power of its darkness. She's scared, Luna, because she believes that she's close to a death from which she has no hope of escaping; if whatever this new power is has come to take Equestria, then it'll attack its leaders first – and if the host dies, then so does the parasite.”

Luna turned away from her sister for a moment, her eyes reflecting a regretful sadness that bore the scars of a millennia of nightmares. Her voice cracked momentarily as she spoke once more;

“I'm to die, then, according to her?”

“You know that we've been through too much for me to simply sit by and let that happen. You're still not at full power, Luna, so it's my duty to protect you until you are,” Celestia answered, walking slowly over to her sorrowful sister and placing a lily-white wing over the younger mare's shoulders. She whispered her next few words with soothing softness; “And they'll turn me into sunbeams and stardust before they even come close to touching you – I promise you that.”

Luna smiled at that, and her mood brightened instantly; ducking out of Celestia's wing, she jumped onto the balcony's barriers and fluttered her wings, admiring the rolling green expanse of the world beneath her. Carefully balancing atop the thin railing, she turned to her sister with a contented expression and relaxed slightly, and spread her wings to their full span for extra stability.

“Until we know for sure, Celestia, I believe that we should at least endeavor to enjoy the coming weeks, if only for the sake of our citizens; there's no point in being depressed over events that we've no guarantee will happen yet, and stressing over worst-case scenarios will – knowing our luck – only increase the likelihood of them occurring.”

Celestia chuckled at her sister's bravery, desperately attempting to expunge all worry from her own mind in order to give Luna hope;

“Of course, Luna; let's try to enjoy the Running of the Leaves, and I'll instruct the guards to keep quiet about being on high alert so as not to... distress any civilians.” She paused momentarily, weighing up her options, and decided on a plan of action; “In any case, you should probably start making your way over to Ponyville, seeing as the festival will start tomorrow-”

“Hold on,” Luna interrupted; “do you not think it's best that I stay here with you, so that we're better equipped to react if an emergency does occur?”

“Firstly, Luna, it's probably better for both of us not to be in the same place if, as the implications of Nightmare's actions would suggest, this new evil power will strike at the rulers first.”

Luna looked away uncomfortably for a moment, though decided that Celestia was probably logically correct on the matter. She continued;

“And secondly – if you don't mind me saying – you need a break.”

The smaller pony rolled her eyes and let out an aggravated huff.

“You're up all night every night and most of the day, and you've been working non-stop since you were sworn back into leadership last year. Even I have at least a small amount of time off, Luna, and the ponies of Ponyville haven't seen you in far too long.”

Luna remembered her own words earlier, and thought it best to give in at this point.

“If you must insist.”

“Workaholic.”

“Hypocrite!”

And with that, Luna settled for childishness, and stuck her tongue out at her sister, beginning to tip over the edge of the balcony as she gave a final mischievous wink and let herself freefall into an invisible current of wind. As her speed increased, she began to adjust the position of her wings and, with one almighty flap, almost instantly killed her downward motion and rocketed skyward. The force of her initial push began to wear off as gravity took hold once more, and she started to beat a slow, regular rhythm with her wings.

Luna glided gracefully in the limitless blue seas, rising and falling as she thumped her wings with immense force and precision – a slowly fading speck of glittering darkness sinking gradually into the infinite light of the afternoon sun. Celestia watched as the aphotic alicorn disappeared into the skyline, and her expression grew more troubled as she whispered to the wind;

“Godspeed, dear sister. I can only hope that we survive.”

• ~ -

Rainbow stood upon a white wisp of cloud, surveying the comfortingly peaceful view of Ponyville below. From this height, pedestrians looked like mere dots in amongst a sea of rooftops and alleyways; even the massive town hall was a mere doll's house compared to what it would have been on ground level, and the Everfree Forest appeared to be a mere stone's throw away from the marketplace. She marvelled in the incredible smallness of it all, silently pondering how such a seemingly tiny and insignificant town could house so many amazing experiences, ponies, memories...

I can even see Twilight's house from here.

“GAH!” Rainbow cried in frustration, flinging herself backwards onto the middle of the cloud. Her thoughts returned once again to the lavender librarian who simply refused to leave her to sleep in peace.

Her head span with ideas, desires, possibilities; what if she likes me? I mean, I know she likes me, but... would I really say no to our relationship advancing beyond that?

The troubled pegasus shut her eyes in an attempt to quell her imagination;

Books weren't the only reason that Rainbow had been coming back to the library so frequently, and she was painfully aware of that; there was something comforting about talking to Twilight. She understood; she understood Rainbow like no-one else ever could. With Twilight, there were no pretences; she didn't feel that she had to be anything but herself, because Twilight never expected anything more or less. The “cool” façade that nopony ever saw behind was almost completely wiped away; the fragility of the mare underneath that mask didn't matter, because with Twilight, she felt safe.

It wasn't as simple as just “friendship” any more.

But why? Why didn't she feel the same way with Applejack, Fluttershy, Rarity or Pinkie? Did she deem them too judgemental to handle the pony she really was?

Of course not, Rainbow thought; I've just been wearing that mask for so long that I feel that I have to wear it in order to exist – and I'm afraid that if I take it off, my exposed self won't be able to satisfy the expectations of those who know me for what I've become. If anything, Twilight has helped me remove that mask.

The brashness, competitiveness, false bravado...

I had to learn a new personality to survive in flight camp. Expose no weakness; be strong. I didn't want to hurt any more. I had to find a way to deal with the bullies – they had a lot to work with; I looked unusual, I was abnormally skilled, came from a... difficult background...

Dash shook her head; that was the absolute last thing that she wanted to think about at a time like this.

I made myself “cool” – and it's turned me into an egotistical narcissist.

But is that the only reason that you act the way that you do? Did you not save Fluttershy from those bullies? How could that possibly have been a self-serving act?

It was only because I couldn't stand to watch another pony break as I did. I guess that's where this “loyalty” came in; friends were so hard to come by, such a rare privilege, that I couldn't risk losing them. The other four are no different; when I met them, I knew I'd found a place in which I could be accepted. But by that time, the mask had been on so long that I dared not take it off for fear of what I'd find underneath – and I certainly didn't want anypony else seeing that; they know and love me as the Rainbow Dash that I want everyone to see.

I'm Rainbow Dash! The most awesome flier in all of Equestria – future Wonderbolt, hero of my own time, 20% cooler!

I have to be strong. I mustn't give in. I mustn't cry.

A torrent of painful memories surged into Rainbow's mind as she lay there on the cloud. She let out a ratcheted breath, and allowed a solitary tear to streak down the side of her face before sitting up once more.

But maybe there is a way out; if I let Twilight help me, then I can finally break the cycle without damaging my friendships – but am I willing to risk the only friendship I have that allows me true freedom by trying to advance it?

How, when and where do I tell her?

What if she doesn't feel the same way?

Rainbow's head span with worry as she launched herself off the side of the cloud, beating her wings furiously in order to dispel the negativity that plagued her consciousness. Tomorrow, she would tell Twilight everything.

Tomorrow, everything would be fine.

A long, long night lay ahead.