Chapter 14: The definition of Partying

"Ugh.... what the.... fuck hit me?" I asked as I rubbed my head.

"Oh girls he's waking up!" Shouted a voice that I could tell was Twilight's.

As I sat myself up I continued to rub my head where I could feel a big welt there. When I sat up completely I opened my eyes and what I saw scared the living hell out of me. 6 pairs of unnaturally large...er eyes at least a foot away from my face. Instantly I kick backwards only to hit the back of my head off a wall.

"Oh for.... well at least the front of my head doesn't hurt anymore...." I groaned with displeasure.

After a moment of awkward silence I decided to open my eyes again, this time to reveal the same set of eyes, only this time attached to visible bodies and MUCH farther away. Rainbow Dash stepped forward and let her ears droop.

"Hey uh... sorry about the whole, 'Knocking you out' thing..... heheh..." She awkwardly stated rubbing the back of her neck.

"Wait YOU did that? Didn't you learn your lesson last time you attacked me?" I said squinting my eyes at her.

"What? Oh that.... no I didn't attack you this time. And it was an accident. It was actually my pet tortoise tank that hit you...." She said with an awkward smile.

I started waving my hand around covering my nose. "Oh? Sorry I'm allergic to bullshit... because how in the hell could a TURTLE-"

"Tortoise." Corrected Fluttershy from behind Rainbow.

I dismissed it with a wave. "Whatever, hit me in the HEAD?" I said pointing at the welt on my head.

As if on cue a tortoise came flying into the room with a weird helicopter propeller thing on it's back.

'Alright.... now I've fucking seen everything' I thought to myself as I scooted to the left dodging one of it's strikes.

"Aaaanyway... other than me getting a concussion.... where are we?" I asked looking around at the room.

All around the room was oldish style nick-knacs and random things here and there. The occasional painting was hung up on the walls and other than a bed and a dresser, nothing else.

A pony stepped forward who looked like she had braided hair and a cowboy hat on. "We're at ma farm. We took ya here just in case ya'll needed help as Fluttershy was pickin' up some apples here and it was faster then goin' to the hospital." She finished as she crossed her front hooves a bit as she stood there.

'Seems fair, probably bad to teleport me there anyway with a possible concussion' I thought to myself, noticing the pain was dieing down.

"Well thanks, my name is Deckard." I stated as I pushed up and off the ground. "Nice to meet you." I finished as I shook the hoof the pony offered me.

"Same here, ma names Applejack." She said tipping her hat a bit when she finished the shake. "And over here are ma friends, most of which ya prolly already met." She mentioned as she motioned to the five ponies behind her.

I recognized them all but one, a particular pink one that seemed to have an unnatural smile adorned on it's face.

"Yeah I know most of you but I just wanted to say that I want to reintroduce myself to most of you, as we kinda got off on the wrong fo... hoof a bit. So..." I paused as I turned to Rainbow Dash, "I just wanted to say sorry for being 'So freaking dense'." I joked as I remembered the hospital incident.

She flew towards me and shrugged. "Ah no problem dude, I'm fine." She said lifting her hoof. As I went to shake it she quickly pulled away. "No I don't do any of that formal stuff." She says as she offers her hoof again.

This time I close my fist and give it a nice bump, getting a small smirk out of her as she flew away.

'Huh... I could get used to her' I thought to myself, 'Maybe...'

"Alright... now the last one I haven't met is that.... pink one.... where the hell did she go?" I questioned looking around the room. "I swear she was right there. You all saw her too right?" I asked them all.

"Oh yeah, that's Pinkie Pie, you'll meet her soon. She is in the barn preparing your late 'Welcome to Ponyville' Party." Answered Twilight as she shook her head, chuckling a bit.

"Wait... party?" I asked with my eyes widening. "You mean, like cake and alcohol and stuff?" I asked getting excited.

"Uh... yeah? Why?" Asked Twilight back.

Before anything else was said however I went rocketing out the room and looking around, realizing I had no idea where I was going. I starting running through random rooms hoping none of them led to a in use bathroom like in one of those cheesy cartoons. Finally I got to a, you guessed it, another door!

"And behind door number thirty!" I said as I opened the door as a gust of fresh air blew past my face. "Ding ding ding ding ding! Freedom!" I yell as I run out the door and towards the nearby barn.

'I don't care if they were watching me the whole time, I just have to get to that barn'

As I reached the large set of double gate doors I pushed hard on them. I watched as they slowly creaked open and revealed heaven itself. There were streamers and balloons everywhere and a large cake in the center. All around the inside of the barn were tables with various drinks of varying types on them. I noticed some vodka on a table and ran over there, pouring myself a small shot and turning around.

"Oh hey girls!" I said with a smile to the five that entered the barn. "Looking for your friend? She is in the rafters up there." I pointed above me as she fell down and bounced like a ball.

"Aw! How did you see me!" She asked with a frown.

"Easy, I gain heightened senses when I am at a party." I said with a devilish smile.

"Really?" Asked Twilight.

"Pffft no, I just know whats around me when I have alcohol because I don't want some poor fool to try and take it from me." I said laughing. "Not like I'm an alcoholic, it's just it's rare where I come from now a days." I said shrugging and downing the shot. "Ahhhh fffffuuck that's good." I say as I turn towards them. "Well? Who wants to party?" I ask as I pour myself another shot of the gods nectar.

**********************************

"So... then I kinda *hic* just.... yeah know?" I said to Applejack who was beside me.

I had sat down and been talking to Applejack about serious life and stuff when suddenly I saw a HUGE balloon over at the other side of the room. And I mean it was MASSIVE. I got up and started stupidly running at it as I tripped and landed on it. I suddenly get propelled backwards a long ways and land in a bale of hay.

"Holy shit that was awesome!" I yell out as I jump from the hay.

All around the room different things were going on. Rainbow dash was passed out in a corner after a drinking contest with Applejack. Rarity and Twilight were talking to each other, while Pinkie was just Pinkieing all over the place like Pinkie would normally Pinkie.... yeah.... what was I walking about?

"Hey applejack!" I yelled out to the drunk mare. "Come here!" I finished as I stumbled out of the hay and onto the ground.

A few moments later Applejack flopped next to me and looked at me. "Yeah?" She said with a confused look.

I slowly stood up and helped her up as she leaned against me for support. "Follow me I have to tell you something." I said as we walked two steps the sat back down. "Okay come here." I said as I motioned her closer as I brought my face to her ear to whisper. "......butts...." I whispered into her ear.

At that second we both fell to the ground laughing our asses off. Finally I calmed down and looked next to me to see Applejack was out, and I probably wasn't to far behind. I took a minute to stand and stumbled over to Twilight and Rarity. They were not drunk, but I could tell they were very close.

"Hey... girls." I said as I patted Twilight's head. "Sup?" I asked looking between them.

"Oh not much we were just talking about some random things." Rarity chipped in smiling.

I quickly nodded. "Oh... okay your secret is safe with me." I said bringing my finger up in a shhhh way.

"W-What?" Responded Rarity with a confused tone.

"Exactly." I said pointing at her as I turned my attention to Twilight who looked to be blushing and slightly smiling. "Heh... your cute..." I said pointing at Twilight and walking away.

"Oh Noooooo!" I yelled out as I realized something. "We never ate the cake!" I screamed dropping to my knees. "We never ate the caaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaake!" I screamed out hitting the ground. "Oh well more for me." I said getting up and making my way to the cake.

Just before I reached it I quickly turned around to see a slightly surprised Rarity and a massively red Twilight. I gave them a salute.

"Ladies." I slurred out as I fell backwards.

*SPLAT*

'Huh... comfy....' I thought to myself as sleep's grasp took a hold of me.

Author's Note

This chapter was a pain in the ASS to get up! Every time I published it it would auto delete itself! Idk why... but I FINALLY got it to work!

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