The Assassin's Quandary

At first, she never came herself. She sent the baby dragon, or sometimes one of her friends, but she never came herself. They asked me questions. Where did you come from, who hired you... The things that Celestia or her guards had asked me hundreds of times already. But eventually they started asking me more questions- About feeling things, otherworldly things that only I could feel, or about paranoia. My answers always seemed to disappoint them.

It wasn’t long before the baby dragon (Spike) and I developed a strange bond. I wouldn’t call it friendship, but then again I never really had a friend. If it was left to me to describe, I would call it appreciation. I was glad to have his company, and he mine, but Spike always felt some fear towards me, no matter how much I wanted him to realize I had no wish to harm him.

Eventually, she came to me in my sleep. I could feel her in my dreams. She was a presence that had previously been unknown to me, always watching in my dreams.

My dreams have always been the safest place for me to be. They were the one place I had complete control, the one place I could be whoever I wanted. I dreamt every night, savoring the sweet solace that came with slumber. But when she entered them, it felt so...different. She had no ability to interact with me, but I could feel her gaze upon me. She was simply observing me. My dreams became stressful; I had no idea to what extent she could examine my mind and dreams, and that frightened me.

Then, one day, she came to me while I was awake.

She had almost fully healed from her injuries. Her eyes sparkled and shone just as they had the night I met her- or rather, tried to kill her. Her mane had been combed casually, and the only remainder of her injury was a cloth wrapping around her midsection. I couldn’t find the words to say, so I stared at her stupidly, cursing myself for not preparing for this.

“Silen. Silen Titus Step. Approximately eighteen years of age. Unregistered in any official documents until sixteen days ago, when you became incarcerated in the Canterlot dungeon. Since then I have been able to link you to eight or so other murders, but I’m sure there are some we don’t know about as well.” She paced slowly in front of my cell door.

“But despite all that, I really don’t know much about you, Silen. You’ve done a remarkable job obscuring your history.” The way she talked wasn’t with contempt or frustration or even fear. It was almost like she was talking to herself, trying to solve a difficult problem by speaking aloud.

“Celestia says that you are unwilling to give us information about your employer. Perhaps that may be a bit much to ask, as we both know that after you tell us what you can you’ll be transferred to a more secure prison, probably for life. Maybe, though, you could tell us about yourself. I want to know all about you, Silen. Spike says I could possibly come to trust you. Celestia thinks you may be an ally. I can’t do that unless I know more. After all, you did try to kill me.”

I was surprised that Spike would go so far as to advocate for me. We were friendly towards each other, but it was still so premature- and I knew that he still feared me. As for Celestia, it was understandable that she would think to tame me- she now knew that I had no love for assassination.

What I didn’t get was the speed with which they came to this understanding. I had barely known these ponies for two weeks, and already they were prepared to accept me? At this point, I had no idea what was in store for me. Even if they did trust me, what would they ask me to do?

“Well? Celestia said you might be uncooperative.”

Twilight’s voice snapped me back to reality. “You want my history? Not much to tell there. I grew up in the old land, technically outside of Equestria. The town was founded on the historical unicorn city of Hornsville. We became prosperous...until the windigos returned. They came during the worst plagues in history, and the windigos were able to feed off of the chaos and hate that the plague spread. The blizzard was too intense for others to lend aid until it was too late. My family died, and I turned to the knife.”

Twilight looked touched by the story. It was an expression I didn’t quite understand, but I appreciated it nonetheless. “What came next?”

“I left Hornsville. It crumbled to the ground after the plague. I did whatever I could to make money, which led me to some shady contacts. Eventually I became their best man, and they asked me to kill for them. It wasn’t long before I had made a name for myself.”

“So that’s it? You’re family died and you became a killer?”

“I would tell you more, but I don’t actually know any more. Distance has been my only ally for these past several years. If I get close to the target, it becomes difficult to kill them.”

“Doesn’t that make it more difficult? If I were an assassin, I would want to know everything about my mark.”

I snorted. “Easy for you to say. Tell me, Twilight, have you ever killed someone?” I stood and walked close to the door. “Have you ever been so close to them you can feel their warmth, hear their heartbeat, smell their fear? Have you ever put a piece of metal into a pony you never even knew, and felt the weight of their death press upon your every waking moment for weeks after?” She looked surprised by my response.

“Well...no...I’m sorry, it’s just...”

“No, forgive me. I should explain more fully. I can’t quite explain it, but...I know things. I can see things coming before they happen. There’s something deep inside of me that guides me. Without it, I would have died long ago. It helps me complete jobs quickly, without getting too attached- like I was with you. I didn’t even know your name before that night, but I almost couldn’t bring myself to do it. If I had known any more about you, I would have let you go.”

“Well then,” She cracked a smile. “Why don’t we get to know each other?”

+~+~+~+~+~+~+

“Rise and shine, Silen! Princess Celestia is waiting for you!” I groggily opened my eyes and watched the world come into focus. Spike was outside my cell door, waving at me. “And maybe this time you’ll wear your cloak? You should look your best for her.” I mumbled something to the effect of “Ok” and withdrew my cloak from the corner it spent most of its time in and looked for something to fill its vital place. I had received some sparse furnishings once it became apparent that I was in for an extended stay. I shifted a table to obscure the hole and stuck my hooves through a hole in the cell door. A guard put cuffs on me, with a special gearbox attached. “What’s this?” I said to Spike as the door opened.

“It’s a null-magic device to keep you from casting spells. One of Twilight’s friends made it awhile ago.” Spike looked saddened by the thought. Maybe the friend was dead now. “Anyway, she’s waiting for us. We better hurry.”

We walked down an ornate hallway, flanked on both sides by royal guards. “So why is Celestia asking for me again? Is she expecting me to have a change of heart just because I get to leave my cell for the interrogation?”

“Nooooot quite,” Spike said nervously. “You’ll see.”

You’ll see. That made me nervous. I hated not knowing what I was getting into, especially when it came to dealing with other ponies.

When I arrived in Celestia’s throne room, I was greeted not only by her but by Twilight and her friends as well.

“Greetings, Silen. I will make it clear right now that I do not trust you. Twilight thinks that I should, but her reasons elude me. However, with it being her life on the line, I feel comfortable allowing her to make this decision.” She nodded towards Twilight.

“Silen, how would you feel about moving out of the dungeon and living with us for awhile? Now, keep in mind, you would be wearing those handcuffs the whole time, and there will be guards watching you the whole time-”

“And me! I got my eye on you, creep!” Yelled Rainbow Dash.

“Er, yes, and Rainbow Dash. Anyway, I think we really can trust you. I’ve really enjoyed talking to you these past few days, and...”

“Yes.” I had no more room for words in me. The feeling of being trusted so completely filled me with an overwhelming joy. Spike patted me and I broke down crying. The yellow pegasus fluttered over and took off my hood, gently stroking my mane.

“Lets go pack your things, Silen.”

+~+~+~+~+~+~+

I didn’t have much to take with me from my cell. There were a few books, some paper and quills, and a blanket- all given to me by Twilight. I could hold all the contents of my cell in a small saddlebag.

“All ready?” I nodded. Spike and I walked up the stairway leading to the suites.

“I’m sorry Spike, but I haven’t entirely processed this.”

“What are you confused about?”

“Well...first off, why? I don’t see the point of all this.”

“Twilight trusts you. No offence or anything, but I don’t really get it either. She said that you would help us, eventually.”

“How well does she think she knows me?” Spike shrugged and we continued walking.

When we entered the block of rooms that made up the suites, we were greeted by Twilight and her 5 friends. I had seen them a few times already, but I only knew the names of Rainbow Dash and Twilight.

“What are you lookin at, creep?” Rainbow Dash. She didn’t want me here and she made no effort to hide that fact. Probably the most athletic of the group. She likes attention, but remains fiercely loyal to her friends.

“Rarity. How do you do, Silen?” She took a small bow. Rarity. Seems nice enough, but obviously doesn’t understand me. Very concerned about appearance, which makes me think she’s possibly just pretending to be nice. Either way, she was a good actor.

“Oh, I’m Fluttershy. You can skip me...” Fluttershy. Her name suits her even better than most ponies. Compassionate. Artistic. Too timid to reveal much.

“I’m Pinkie Pie! And you’re Silen! Silen is such a funny name, isn’t it?” Pinkie Pie. Random. Fun loving, but more intelligent than people give her credit for.

“Uh...I’m Applejack. Pleased to meet you...” Applejack. Her voice was strained as she greeted me. She obviously had a hard time lying. Her physique suggested that she did lots of manual labor, but her cowpony hat and hairstyle showed a playful side as well.

I felt like I knew all about them already. While I could normally pick up on small traits just by looking at somepony, it felt different this time. I felt the need to impress them, to prove that I wanted their friendship. The blue one is trouble... Something brought me back from my reflection, and I saw them all looking at me intently.

“Oh,” I said sheepishly. “Well, I’m Silen, as you know, and...uh...Thank you...” I could barely stammer out the sentence. “Where’s my room?” I whispered to Spike.

After I dumped off my belongings, I went to look for Twilight. She was the only one I felt comfortable with around her, or around anywhere for that matter. I knew that if she was to trust me I would also need to win the trust of her friends, but just the thought of talking to them made me nervous.

As fate would have it, I ran into Fluttershy on the way to Twilight. She was very kind, but neither of us were very good at starting conversation.

“Oop! Excuse me, Silen...”

“Oh, sorry...”

We awkwardly nudged past each other. I cursed myself for not saying anything more.

“Oh, one thing!” I barely caught her delicate voice from behind me. “I think this is yours...” She passed me the clockwork mouse that I had used as a distraction all those nights ago.

“Thank you! This little guy would have been nice to have in my cell these past few weeks. Quite the cool toy, is he not?”

“Oh, of course. So life-like too! I thought for sure Rarity was about to squash him when I came in and snatched him up.” She let out a small giggle. “You aren’t so bad, Silen. Maybe Twilight was right about you.”

“Trust me,” I said as I walked away. “She was.”