These damn celebrities! Why are they so fast?, I thought between pants of my breath.

I had chased these two around almost the entire base, and somehow, they always were a hundred feet in front of me. I had tried using my wings, but that only made things worse. They could fly faster than they could run.

"Ah.......come...on...guys!", I choked out to the two asses in front of me.

"What?", Soarin' asked, running in reverse. "Getting tired rookie?"

I furrowed my row in anger at his taunts.

"No....I'm...fine!", I panted.

Fire Streak laughed. "

Just remember, you still have conditioning at three!", he shouted.

Soarin' tossed him the sneakers, and he took to the sky.

"Oh!......Celestia......Dammit!", I croaked.

I unfurled my wings, but I was tackled by a blue-grey mass before I even pumped. Soarin' laughed the whole way down to the ground.

"Go Fire! Hide em!", he shouted at his fleeing friend.

He had my shoulders pinned, and he looked down at me.

"Now beg for mercy, rookie!", he joked.

"Ah come on! Just give em back!", I said to the stallion on top of me.

"Not until you beg!"

"I'm not begging for shit!"

"Then it's simple. I won't let you go."

"You suck!"

He reached for one of my splayed wings, and yanked at one at one of the primary feathers.

"OW! Jeez! Don't do that!", I shouted in pain.

"Don't do what? This?", he said sarcastically, yanking at the feather.

"Stop!"

"Nah, this is too much fun!"

He yanked at the feather once more, and this time, it fell out. He looked down at the stray object in his hand, and tossed it aside. He was going to say something, but we heard a muffled laughter coming from somewhere close. We looked to the side, and much to my horror, saw Blaze and Fleetfoot laughing at the sight before them.

I blushed heavily, and I'm sure Soarin' was too. I tried to think of a decent explanation for the whole spectacle.

"Uh....um....I-Ican explain!", I stammered.

The mares only laughed again.

"I'm going to have to ask Misty if she really slept with you!", Blaze commented.

"Aw, don't look so sad, noob!. It's okay if you're a coltcuddler!", Fleetfoot said.

My blush only burned hotter.

"I'm not a coltcuddler!", I shouted at the mares. "Soarin'! Get off!"

Soarin' obliged this time around, and refused to look at the mares. The giggled, and walked over to us.

"Oh hey! Cheer up, guy! We were just kidding.", Blaze said to me.

"But it leads me to wonder, why were you mounting the new guy huh? As far as I could tell, you had a crush on cap'.", Fleetfoot said to Soarin'

The two's eyes went wide in realization.

"Oh no! Noob, they stole your shoes, didn't they?", Fleetfoot asked me.

"Yeah! Did you plan this?", I asked her.

She shook her head.

"No. It's a kind of hazing thing we do. Like the whole sheet rule, when a new member joins the team, we steal their shoes before conditioning. It happened to me, it happened to Blaze here, and it even happened to Soarin'."

"Great! Now I have to go find my shoes, if you don't mind.", I said in mock interest.

I gave a good pump of my wings, and took to the skies.

I was deep in the cloud layer above the base.

Fire Streak must be around here somewhere, I thought.

He was a Wonderbolt though, so he could be in Canterlot by now. I was feverishly searching the clouds for a trace of the yellow stallion.

"Come the fuck on! Where are you!", I shouted at the clouds.

I gave a strong buck at one of the clouds behind me. When I did, a strong aroma hit my muzzle. It was an odd, almost familiar smell. I couldn't put my finger on exactly what it was, but it was extremely potent. I got a little light headed, and some weird, sudden interest towards this smell. I flew in no real direction, only to the source of the smell.

I sniffed out the source, and much to my surprise, it was a cloud near-by. A small, quiet sound was coming from the cloud, but it was too quiet to tell what it was. As I approached the cloud, the noise became much clearer. It was a quiet sobbing.

I poked my head through the cloud, and saw a truly sad sight. Rainbow Dash was hugging her knees close to her chest. Her uniform jacket was torn, and her boots were gone. On top of that weird scent, clearly coming from Rainbow, the iron smell of blood hit my nose. She continued to sob, unaware of my presence.

"R-Rainbow.", I finally said.

She looked up, and turned her head towards me. One of her eyes was black, and she had dried blood tracing down the corners of her mouth. She was shaking, and her breath was ragged and shaky.

"Rainbow. Who did this to you?", I asked her.

I stood on the cloud she was on, and the scent only amplified. I swayed a little on my feet, and my loins started to stir. She took note of my sudden disorientation, and she began to back away from me.

"N-n-no! Just...just stay back!", she shouted at me.

"Rainbow! I just want to help!", I said to her.

"I don't want your help! Just leave!"

"You're hurt, Rainbow. I want to know who did this to you!"

I took a few cautionary steps towards her, and she continued to back away. She eventually reached the edge of the cloud we were on.

"Please.", she weakly said. "Just go."

I shook my head.

"I can't leave you here like this.", I stated.

I walked up to her, and knelt in front of her. The smell was overpowering now, and I nearly fell over. Rainbow was shaking more than before, and he eyes wouldn't leave mine. I put my hand on her cheek in an effort to comfort her.

"Rainbow, someone hur-"

She threw her self into my chest, sending us both flying backwards. I put my hands out to stop me from hitting my head. Rainbow was over me, looking down at my lips.

"Ugh, jeez, what was th-"

I was stopped by a pair of soft lips pushing up against mine. My eyes flew open, and I went completely rigid. Rainbow moaned as she pushed into the kiss more. Somehow, her tongue found its way into my mouth, and it was exploring every nook and cranny it could search out.

I didn't know what to do. There, sitting on my waist, was one of the most beautiful mares (Who I had a hateful crush on) pushing her tongue into my mouth. She had a girlfriend who was one of the most dangerous looking looking lesbians I've ever seen, but I felt like this kiss was.....right. Maybe it was the passion of the kiss, maybe it was the secret feelings I had for her, or maybe it was the odd scent coming from Rainbow, but I knew right then and there, that Gilda didn't deserve Rainbow.

..........The scent? The scent!

I put my hands on Rainbow's shoulders, and I pushed her off of me. A small strand of saliva connected our mouth for a second, before the distance between us broke it. The tears returned to her eyes again, and I wiped my mouth clean of spit.

"Oh my gosh! I'm so sorry!", she exclaimed, "I just don't know what came over me! I don' know, maybe it was about last night, or how nice you really are, or-"

"Rainbow!", I shouted, cutting her off. "You're in the heat. Trust me I can tell."

I put a small grin on my face to calm her down.

"Oh, that too.", she muttered.

That explains the smell.

"I'm really, really sorry. When I go into the heat, Celestia, I just loose my mind!", she said.

I put my hands up to silence her.

"It's all good Rainbow.", I lied.

Truthfully, I wanted to kiss her again, as she and rip off each other's clothes, my hands exploring her body, as we make love on top of a rain cloud........

"Uh, Earth to Legs? You still there?", she said, breaking me out of my mental utopia.

"Oh yeah, sorry."

I looked at her again. The tears on her jacket were not some accident. They were in a specific pattern. Talons.

"Rainbow.", I said to her.

She looked me in the eyes again.

"It was Gilda, wasn't it?"

She looked down at the cloud floor. Her fists clenched, and tears began to fall.

"Yes.", she whispered.

I sighed sympathetically, and pulled Rainbow close.

"It's okay, Rainbow. It wasn't your fault.", I said to her.

She began to sob into my shoulder.

"Let's go see Spits on this, okay?"

She only nodded.

"Come in.", Spits said from the other side of the door.

I grasped the handle of her door, and pulled it open.

"Ah, Legs, what do you need?", she asked.

"Uh 'cap, I think I'd better sow you.", I replied.

Spitfire looked confused. I grabbed Rainbow's hand, and brought her into the office. Rainbow looked down at the ground, and Spits dropped the papers in her hand.

"Oh.....my......Celestia", she breathed.

Spits went up, and put he hand on Rainbow's tattered jacket. She was inspecting it, but then she scrunched up her brow.

"Ah man! What's that smell?", she asked, looking accusingly at me.

She took another whiff, and looked back at Rainbow.

"Oh...Oh! Sorry.", she commented.

"Who did this?", Spitfire asked.

"Who do you think?!", I snapped.

"Gilda?"

Rainbow nodded, and Spits adopted an expression of rage.

"That.....thrice...damned......BITCH!", she screamed.

Spits walked back to her desk, and opened a drawer. She withdrew two dangerous looking, chrome pistols.

"You ever use one of these?", she asked, removing a pair of handcuffs.

"Wait! Shouldn't we call the police?", I said.

Spitfire threw her head back, and laughed.

"Legs, we are a military organization. We are the police!", she said.

She handed me one of the pistols, and gestured for both of us to follow her.

Rainbow was returned to her room, and Spits and I walked to the entrance of the base. She took out her cell phone, and dialled the police.

"Hello, Cloudsdale Police Department."

"Hey, it's Spitfire, I could use some backup."

"For, Ms. Spitfire?"

"A miss Gilda Griffon assaulted one of my fliers, and I'm thinking domestic violence as well."

"Very well, what's the adress?"

Spitfire gave them the address, and hung up her cell phone.

"Come on Legs, we have a Griffon to bust!"

Author's Note

ANNIE ARE YOU OKAY, SO ARE YOU OKAY ANNIE? ARE YOU OKAY ANNIE? YOU'VE BEEN HIT BY *bang bang* YOU'VE BEEN STRUCK BY *bang bang* A SMOOTH CRIMINAL!!!

Shit's about to go down!