Horses Are Melodramatic

Scootaloo fretted at Rainbow Dash’s hooves, terrified of discovery and also a lot of other things.

Luna appeared in the moon behind Rainbow Dash’s back, speaking directly into the filly’s mind, “You must confront your true fear.”

“I’m afraid of the headless horse!”

“Your other true fear.”

“I’m afraid of Fiscal Cliff Richards and his catchy 80’s songs about love, heartbreak and the potential of drastic cuts to public services.”

“No, Scootaloo,” the mare in the moon who was not Nightmare Moon grumbled, “your other, other true fear.”

Before Scootaloo could say anything else, the clouds beside Luna billowed, taking the form of a lion. Scootaloo’s father, Mufasa, who was totally dead, “Remember. Remember, who you are. Remem-”

The cloud lion was cut off by a cumulus cloud that climbed into the sky, taking the form of the head of a mostly hairless ape wearing sunglasses, “Scootaloo, make this old jazz man-”

The voice of Bleeding Gums Murphy was cut off by the sound of a deep, rasping voice announcing, “Scootaloo, I am ... use the ... Um, guys,” said the image of Darth Obiwan Skywalker that had appeared in the stars, “I can’t remember what I’m supposed to say. I’m not even sure what I’m supposed to be a reference to anymore. I think I was in Star ... Laser? Some sort of movie thing? It was popular back in the 70s.”

Rainbow Dash sighed wearily and picked Scootaloo up off the dirt, where she had collapsed. The poor, little filly seemed to be having some sort of seizure or fit. Gently, Dash wiped some foam from the corner of Scootaloo’s mouth, lifted the spasming form onto her back and flew her to the hospital.