Equestrian Diaries

Dear diary,

Celestia here saying that I hate everypony!

I mean, I know that I'm the only one that can raise the sun and the moon and the stars and shit but they don't have to cry to me for everything. Dammit, I'm two thousand years old, I'm too old to be dealing with that.

They pray to me for every-fucking-thing! Don't they know that I can hear them! Last night, I was sleeping and Cherilee started praying for a man.

What am I, God?! Okay, I suppose that I am but I can't do everything. Ever since I sealed Luna away, I've been on my own. I tried replacing her with Twilight Sparkle but that little bitch is just so needy. Princess teach me this, Princess teach me that! Oh Me, go chew on a sharp rock.

Diary, I think that I want my little sister back. I can weaken the seal but knowing her, she'd try to kill me the second she got out of the moon. Not my problem, I'm immortal.

Celestia