Time skip, time skip, everypony hates a time skip~

"What...What the hell are you singing?" You say as you take your lunch and look around for your three friends, Strings, Quickdraw, and Sunshine. Your lunch wasn't anything special, just some wheatballs, milk, orange juice and a bagel. Fucking, bagels. Where are the damn donuts?

Oh yea, what your conscience was singing. It isn't important right now. What is important, is that you were let off of duty early, and that you start your nighttime shift tomorrow. Your conscience is actually surprised, Princess Celestia let you go without a second thought, and now you have the whole afternoon for yourself. So, what do?

"First, let me go sit with my homeboys real quick." You say as you find your three friends and sit right next to Quickdraw, who was busy munching down some wheatballs. Ha. Sunshine, or Sunny, whichever is fine, is sitting right next to Strings who were across the lunch table from you. You greet them normally.

Sup bitches.

"What up."

'Really?'

What? That's normal.

Anyways, you bump hoofs with with all three of them, and you began to eat your food. However, you could sense that somepony out there was watching, waiting, and hungry for your attention. You look around, but all you could see were other Royal Guards eating, and Sunny, Strings and Quickdraw staring at you.

"You alright lil' man?" Sunny's deep voice bellowed, earning him your attention. "You look like you've been through some tough shit, is everything all right?"

"Yea, no need to worry. I've just had a crazy day so far, but thank Celestia that she personally gave me the day off. As soon as lunch is finished, I'ma go hit up my Playstallion3 and just relax." You take a sip out of your O.J, sighing deeply after drinking it. "Some damn good O.J."

"Speaking of game systems," Sunny said as he cracked his neck. "Did ya'll here about that new Playstallion4? I think it's going to top that TrotboxOne."

Quickdraw looked at Sunny in confusion. "Sunny, you pay attention to that shit? I thought you weren't into video games, considering how old you look and sound." Quickdraw looked over at you and smiled. "Playstallion all day, boi!"

Sunny chuckled deeply, "I'm only 22, bro. Puberty blowed me way like a fart in a windstorm."

Strings, "String Bean" choked on his milk, laughing. "That shit was funny, man!" You shared a laugh with the three, happy that you could have such fun friends like these fools. "But gotta say, Trotbox360 and TrotboxOne all day."

"Awe shit, here we go." You say as Quickdraw slowly turns his head towards his skinny friend. "I've tried both consoles, I think it's the same shi-"

"Fuck Gaystallion."

"Fuck Gaybox."

"Fancolts, fancolts everywhere, private." Sunny said to you as you shake your head. "I really can't say much because I ain't try the Trotbox. But enough of this senseless topic, how was your day, private?"

"Crazy shit." You said, shaking your head away from the memory of Princess Celestia's ass all up on your face. Yet, it seems like you couldn't hide it, because your face was a little red, and the boys seemed to noticed.

"Looks like something interesting happened today. Go on, who was she?" Strings said, drinking the rest of his milk.

"I bet she had an ass. Mmmmmmm I love juicy ass." Quickdraw said, laughing. You agreed with him in your head.

"Who doesn't love ass? Damn, the things I would do to a plump, round juicy one." Sunny said, laughing. It's a damn good thing he didn't get a wingboner, no bro over here wan'ts to see that. You should tell them, it would really make a good conversation going.

'I'm only doing this because I want to.'

That's my boy!

"Yea, something did happened. earlier today, I went to a mares room in this castle, and I caught her doing yoga. I was trying to leave, but she insisted that I stayed. I did, and she gave me a show, but unfortunately, I left before I could get it in." You started to feel down on that. Serves you right, dick sniffer.

"Yoga? And she gave you a show? My dude, hell yea!" Strings said, bumping your hoof. "Too bad you didn't get it in with her."

"Why didn't you? She had an ass though, right?" Quickdraw said. You nodded, and actually looked annoyed. "If she had an ass, then why didn't you do her?"

"Chill, homie. So, who was this chick?" Sunny said as he rubbed his chin. "I bet it was one of them maids. We all know them maid mares are some freaks, and Celestia knows I love a freaky bitch."

You grin nervously. "Funny you mentioned that...You see, the mare that was performing yoga in front of me, with tight yoga pants...was Princess Celestia."

All three of them looked at you, and you waited for the laughs you were about to receive. You didn't get the lolz though.

"....She got ass for days." Sunny said in awe. "An eternity, even."

"You lucky ass, new guy, bitch ass bastard." Quickdraw said, patting your back. "This guy got a lap dance from the princess, freaking unbelievable!"

"Calm your tits, Quickdraw, you planning on letting every guard here know?!" Strings said, hushing down the laughing stallion. He looks at you, grinning. "You know, you are one special stallion, You got three bro's like us, a room to yourself, and a front row seat to the biggest ass in the kingdom! So then what happened? I mean, after you ran out the room."

"Well, she had six guests, and said guests wanted to talk to her, but she was in the shower. I made a lie, saying that she got sick, but they didn't believe me, hogtied me, and questioned me. The princess came out, and let me go for the rest of the day. I'll tell you something, I did not enjoy being hogtied like that."

"Sounds like a good ass day to me." Sunny said, bumping your hoof. "Your day didn't seem crazy at all, you just gotta learn to smile through all the bullshit, you know?"

"Yea, laugh at your own pain, and you'll be good." Strings said, coming back from throwing away his food.

That's when you had a second thought about your day. You recalled everything that happened, and a smile began to form on your face, fallowed by laughter. "Yea. I guess you right, I should just laugh at my own pain and move on."

Sunny, Quickdraw and Strings smiled. They all looked at the clock, an began cleaning up. "Well, we got to get back to our shifts, we'll see you later, bro." Sunny said, standing up and stretching. These guys have been so nice to you, and took you into their group with open arms. How about you let them chill in your crib for tonight?

"Hey, you all get out at 4:00 P.M, right? How about you all come and chill with me?" You say, waiting for their answer.

They all looked at each other, smiling.

"Hell yea!"

"So this is your room, huh? Not bad private, not bad."

"Yea, it got's a chill vibe to it and-oh shit, a Playstallion3!"

"Fuck that, he got a Trotbox360!"

You prepared the arrival of your friends, and thankfully, you got a unicorn who was skilled in magic to make the room bigger than how it usually is, giving everypony ball-space. That means room for them. Shit, the stallion was so good with magic, that he even through in a kitchen and shit! Now it looks like a really big one room apartment, with your bed in one room and your game stations in the living room, with the big ass T.V. There was also five boxes of pizza, because big colts like you guys need to eat, know what I'm saying?

Anyways, you even got a pool table in there, and you don't even know how you got it! That' dope!

"There's pizza in case you all get hungry, all right Quickdraw and Strings?" You say to them as you set up the pool table for you and Sunny. They were too busy fighting over which system to play, but you're sure that they get the idea. You look up at Sunny, who was eating three slices at once, and you'r eyes widened a bit. "Damn Sunny, chill."

"What, a colt hungry!" He said as he ate the slices in one bite. "Got any soda?" You pointed at the fridge, and he busted out with six bottles of Cola. Damn, that unicorn gave you everything! "So what we playing?"

"Last one to hit the black eight ball wins. You down?" You say as you just finished setting up the balls.

"Hell yea. This is gonna be one good ass night."

And so it was. You and your friends had tons of fun, playing pool, beating Quickdraw's and Strings ass on both systems, with some help with Sunny, laughing about their and your emberessing moments in life. It gave you a good feeling in life, you know? Knowing you got friends you can trust and hang out with.

It really is a good feeling. And you smiled at this.

Time had passed by quicker than it was suppose to, and everypony had to go. You all agreed that you would do the same thing again on your day off, and that made all four of you happy as a motherfucker.

You went back to your room after locking the door and cleaning up the little mess you all made. For three big guys like them, save for Strings, they sure make a lot less of a mess than expected.

You slid under your bed and began to enter dreamland, finally understanding the meaning of laughing at your own pain.

Princess Celestia smiles at the thought of the new guard learning about friendship,and passing his test without out even realizing it. It was to, just as Sunny said earlier, smile through all of the bullshit that is thrown your way. She also got him the pool table. She turns off the T.V's in her room, and enters her very large bed. She hears a metallic, vibrating noise, than sadly smiles.

"Poor Tyrone, he couldn't handle it. It's okay, nopony can handle Big Sexy." She levitated the destroyed dildo and puts Tyrone back into the suitcase, locking it, and placing it in her drawer. "I'll fix you up later, for now, my hoof will have to do some work."

She smiles seductively, "At least this one won't break easily."

Author's Note

And the Laughing At My Pain Arc is finished! About damn time, too!

As summer approaches, new fics and chapters will be brought into the light, and Molestia will live on forever!

Yay!

Hope I made you guys laugh. Sorry Asian, but can't leave my bronies in the dark.

Have nice day!

P.S: Yes, fanboys do make fun of each others consoles, and to such a degree that they would call it gay. I personally have tried both, and it's the same shit to me. As long as it plays games, I'm fine with it. Stop the arguing.