"What the hell Pinkie?"

"Um, Pinkie, what the hell is going on?" I yell, trying to be heard over the Cake's cries of terror. Pinkie had gone from laughing like a lunatic, to dancing like a nut job.

Pinkie just continued to dance around the tear in the fabric of existence, until she finally caught sight of my waving my forelegs frantically trying to get her attention. She then proceeded to casually saunter up to me like there was nothing wrong at all, as if a huge fucking wormhole was not swirling in the center of the bakery.

"Oh, hiya, Pyrefly! Why are you waving your forelegs around like that? You look crazy when you do that silly." She giggled. "So, what's up?"

"Pinkie, excuse me for asking, but why the hell is there a open fucking wormhole in the middle of the bakery!" I shouted after I was seen as the one out of place here.

"Oh, that old thing? Its just my Matter Re-positioning Displacement Matrix. Or my MRDM for short!" She replied, as if it was common knowledge to everypony what it was and that she had one.

"Right," I said, thinking about the 5 billion new questions that now popped into my head at this new information. "So, this, what did you call it again?" I asked.

"Its my Matter Re-positioning Displacement Matrix."

"Ah yes, of course. Its your Matter Re-positioning Displacement Matrix-"

"Or MRDM!" Pinkie chimed in.

"Yes, of course, how the hell could I have forgotten the acronym? Thank you Pinkie. So, where did you get your MRDM? I've never seen this before, and I've been around for sometime now."

"I made it silly. And you're the first pony to ever see it."

"What do you mean I'm the first pony to see this thing? It's impossible to miss! The damn thing takes up a whole fucking room!"

"Well, to be honest, I think somethings wrong. Usually its not suppose to be visible in this plane of existence. I made it so that only I knew it existed. I think something is trying to come through, which I didn't think could happen, since I designed it so that I could pop up in random places when ever I wanted."

'OH MY CELESTIA! Did Pinkie just pull a Twilight? What the hell!' I thought to myself as I listened to Pinkie sound uncharacteristically smart. Then something she just said hit me like a chicken riding a scooter. 'Wait did she just say what I think she just said?'

"Did you just say this thing is what lets you pop out of fucking no where? Then how do you defy physics all the time? And is it just me, or did the Cake's finally get tired of screaming and just walk away?"

"Yes, not telling, and yes." Pinkie said, still kind of lost in thought over what the hell her Re-placing Matter Displacement Matrix thingy was doing. "I just wonder what could be happening. The voices in my head helped me design it a long time ago, but never once did they tell me that stuff could travel through it besides me."

'Voices in her head? Great, everyone's suspicions where true. Pinkie is an escaped psychopath!'

"Pinkie, I think we should get this thing  over to Twilight. Maybe she can help figure all this out. After all, she is the brains of the band of misfits we are."

Suddenly Pinkie's mane deflated, and her eyes began to drift farther apart than Derpy's. She turned my way and I was suddenly filled with the fear that I would soon wake up in a basement about to be mutilated and gutted simple to make a batch of delicious cupcakes. But then just as suddenly, her mane re-inflated with a poof that sounded from no where and put on a huge grin.

"That's a GREAT idea Pyrefly! Lets use the MRDM and get there lickity split!"

"Ah, Pinkie, don't you think it would be SAFER if we just walked there, figuring the thing is acting all wonky right now?"

"That's a great idea too!"

'Really Pinkie, I never thought the day would come when I'd think you were ever gonna get weirder.'

"Oh you haven't seen nothing yet Pyrefly!" Pinkie said, bouncing past me with her 'thing' following close behind her.

"Did you just read my mind?" I asked as I followed behind her.

"Did you just say something?" The party pony asked, glancing back at me as she continued on.

"What? Ha? You know what? Forget it. Let's just get to Twi's and fix that damn swirling thing."

"Okie dokie Loki!"

'How did dropping off directions for a birthday cake for Icy's coltfriend turn into this?'

And just as that thought crossed my mind, the memory of my punishment for failing to complete my errand for my little sister flashed back into my brain.

'Fuck! I'm gonna go home and get flash frozen till Dash comes back for this!'

'Don't worry Pyrefly, Mr. and Mrs. Cake got you sis' instructions. I gave it to them before we left.'

'What the hell? Pinkie! Are you talking to me telepathically?'

'.....'

"That's it! I'm insane!" I whispered to myself in defeat and fear of how Pinkie was doing all that crazy stuff like read my thoughts and talk in my head.

Thankfully the rest of the walk over to Twilight's was uneventful. As we arrived, we where greeted by the sound of laughter erupting from within the tree.

"Well, looks like Spike found out about my joke first hand. Gullible little dragon." I chuckled to myself.

As Pinkie and I walked through the door, I narrowly dodged a stream of green flames.

"What the hell Pyrefly! I thought you said Rarity was a Fillyfooler!" said a gender-bent Spike.

Pinkie immediately burst into laughter, along with Twilight, who looked like she hadn't been able to breath fully from laughing for a while now. Also joining in on the commotion was AJ, and Rarity herself, whom I assumed where there to talk to Twi but got caught off guard by the now female Spike. And even more to my surprise was that Fluttershy was there too, rolling around on her back, holding her sides, also unable to stop laughing. Which was the second thing I'd never thought I'd ever witness in my life.

"Why are you all laughing at me? This isn't cool! Twilight, Stop laughing for a moment and change me back!" Spike shouted at the lavender unicorn.

"Ok, ok. Just give me a minute!" Twilight said in between bursts or laughter.

"You said that over two hours ago after Rarity and Applejack arrived shortly after Pyrefly left and you cast that damn spell!"

"Alright. Your right Spike. Stand stand still and I'll change you back." Twilight relented.

"It's about damn time," Spike scoffed.

"Hold on a sec," I said, stopping Twi before she could cast the reversion spell. "Spike, I just want to say that you're the one that chose to believe me. I did say she 'maybe' into mares. I never said for sure she was."

"Whatever, Twilight just change me back!"

"Alright Spike, get ready..."

But just as Twilight was about to cast her spell for a second time, she was once again interrupted. Yet It wasn't by anypony in the room. It was by the temporarily forgotten MRDM,, which suddenly began crackling with bolts of electricity. And then, with a burst of light, it vanished from sight.

"What was that light?" Twilight asked, looking around.

"Oh, it was just my MRDM. It must have fixed itself and returned to its personal hammer-space." Pinkie giggled uncontrollably.

"Well,I'm glad that's solved." I said with a sight of relief, just before spotting what looked like a little puff of fur on the floor right in the same spot as Pinkie's swirling vortex from hell just was seconds prior. "Ah, girls-"

"Excuse me?" Said the STILL gender-bent Spike.

Refraining from releasing another audible laugh, I continued as I was. "Ah, GIRLS, I think we may have a problem. What the hell is that thing?"

As all seven pairs of eyes fell on the bizarre puff ball, it began to move and unroll its self. It had brown and white fur, big brown eyes, pointy ears, and a piece of parchment secured to a collar around its neck. Little did we know that that moment was merely the start of a very bad series of events.