The Peacemaker

Rainbow Dash:

I had left Dmitry at the rock farm where Pinkie pulled some strings and got Dmitry a job, well more like put him into slave labour but either way it was a convenient cover until I could find him a place to stay.

I entered the library without even knocking and led myself downstairs without even telling Twilight I was here.

I rubbed my eyes and tried to shake off my exhaustion but I knew that I was going to have to go to sleep soon. I walked into the revolving doors and entered the darkroom. I took my hooves away from rubbing my eyes and was met by the sight of Trixie sitting down in a chair. “Hello, Rainbow Dash” Trixie replied in a snooty sort of voice. “Yeah, hi” I replied, ignoring her as I went to grab my photos then my stomach sunk as I realized my photos weren’t on the drying line.

“Looking for these?” Trixie sneered and levitated out my pictures. “Hey give me those” I yelled out but Trixie took them back and held them out of my reach. “Hey you can’t do that” I yelled and she raised an eyebrow. “Where’s the human?” she asked and I snarled “Screw you I’m not telling you shit” I scowled and she sighed. “The army arrives in the morning and they’ll arrest you for withholding information” Trixie threatened.

“Ha, they won’t arrest me I’m an Equestrian hero for Celestia’s sake. I’ve helped save Equestria more times than… than… I don’t even know” I blurted out and she levitated out a news article if front of me ‘Equestrian hero found with LBH soldiers and is executed’. “That’s absurd, he’s not an LBH soldier he’s my friend” I yelled but Trixie simply shrugged. “The army won’t see it that way I’m afraid but if you tell me now I’ll be sure to tell them that you weren’t part of his resistance movement” Trixie told me.

“Fuck you, I’m not telling you shit” I swore, I wouldn’t rat out my friend to Trixie just so they could kill him. Trixie let out a disappointed sigh and levitated a picture forward that I had taken of Dmitry and Pinkie. “Too bad, the army is going to look at these and they’re going to have to arrest Pinkie as well because she was involved, oh and I suppose they’ll arrest Twilight as well because she was the one who hid him all this time” Trixie sneered.

“YOU CAN’T DO THAT” I yelled and she laughed and held up a hoof. “Oh we can and we will” she said and my head drooped down in self disappointment. “The rock farm… he’s at the rock farm” I told her sadly he horn flared up and I felt myself become surrounded in her magical aurora but soon my exhaustion flooded through me and I passed out.

* * *

I awoke abruptly in an unfamiliar bed and as I looked around I realized I was in the library. I lept up and rushed to the window to go warn Pinkie and Dmitry but a magical aurora encased me. “HEY WHAT ARE YOU” I began but the aurora closed down tightly around my mouth and held it shut. “Shh, you don’t want to wake Twilight now do you?” Trixie whispered in a sneering voice and set me back into the makeshift bed.

“Don’t worry, we still have six hours before the military arrives, so you have lots of time to get some sleep” Trixie laughed and I snarled and rolled over so I wouldn’t have to look at her. I began to fake sleep, though she probably knew that I was fake sleeping I had the upper advantage, I had endurance that she probably didn’t have.

I waited for what seemed like hours than rolled over like I was simply rolling over in my sleep and creaked open my eye and looked to Trixie. She had passed out trying to watch me and now slept sitting in a chair.

I quietly snuck out of bed and crept into the kitchen, I didn’t dare try to escape through the window or front door in fear of making too much noise. I quietly snuck over to the phone and dialed the number for the rock farm, the phone seemed to buzz incredibly loud as it rang the other end of the phone line.

The other end picked up “Mmm yeah?” replied an obviously irritated voice, I couldn’t blame him it was early in the morning. “Mr. Rocks, keep it down, it’s Dash” I whispered, he sighed. “Yes Dash, what can I do for you at… four in the morning?” he asked, still irritated that I called him. “Listen Rocks, the army is coming here in the morning, they think that Dmitry is some sort of super soldier or something and they’re going to kill everyone involved with him if they think it’s true so I need you to tell Dmitry then start working him really hard in like an hour, and paint some fake blood on his back to make it look more real. Then when the army arrives make it look like he’s got a harsh life and could never be an LBH soldier” I whispered and he grunted.

“Alright… I’ll see you in a little while then” Rocks replied then hung up the phone. I snuck back over to the makeshift bed and went to sleep peacefully, I had a good feeling about tomorrow.

* * *

Trixie:

I was lost in the dreaming world and was having the most spectacular of dreams.

“Special agent Trixie, for performing above and beyond the call of duty I am making you a military advisor and chief of the army, sorry for ever doubting you” Hammerhead apologized and pinned a congressional medal of honor to my chest. Celestia walked over and shook my hoof but as she did I felt my whole earth begin to shake then I awoke abruptly.

“Guh… huh?” I mumbled drowsily and Rainbow Dash was shaking me awake. “Come on Trixie, some general guy is here to see you” she told me and I jumped to all hooves as I realized I had fallen asleep. “How long have you been up?” I asked her and she shrugged. “Not long, the army woke me up when they were banging on the front door” she informed me then walked into the kitchen.

Twilight stepped in front of me with a cross look on her face. “For some reason the army is on my front door steps. You wouldn’t know anything about this would you Trixie?” she asked me and I straightened my tie and smiled “Please call me Special agent” I replied and walked over to the front door and opened it. General Hammerhead was a very burly stallion, standing at an astonishing 5’7” he almost stood eye to eye with Celestia who was 6 feet high exactly. He was getting to an older age and his mane had started to grey and he had wrinkles on his face but his face was squared and his body build was heavy. Just his mere appearance would make a pony quiver in fear.

“This better be good evidence Trixie or by god I’ll ring your” he began but I levitated out the photos and he stopped and looked to them. He sifted through them and dropped all the other photos to the floor as he held the one with Dmitry shooting the massive boulder with an energy shot.

“Yeah that’s my personal favourite as well” I replied as he looked at the picture with widened eyes. “Everyone out of the house and get onto the carriages. Where is this menace?” Hammerhead asked and I pointed out towards where the rock farm was. “Out of town at the rock farm” I informed him.

* * *

Rainbow Dash:

Trixie had told the general of Dmitry’s whereabouts but I had a feeling that they were in for a huge surprise.

The drivers of the military carriages, which were based loosely off of human vehicles, parked the carriages by the rock farm house where a middle aged stallion stood, sipping his morning coffee.

Trixie rushed up to him with the general right behind her. “Alright where is it!” Trixie ordered and Mr. Rocks raised an eyebrow “What, like the rocks?” he asked and Trixie jabbed him in the chest with a hoof. “You know damn well what I’m talking about, the human, where’s the human?” Trixie yelled and Mr. Rocks simply laughed.

“What’s so funny?” the general asked and Rocks pointed to his farm where several humans worked slave labour in the rock fields. “You idiot, stop playing us for fools, where the hell is that human with special powers?” Trixie screamed, a vein bulged from her forehead and looked like it was going to explode.

“Special powers? Like… can work faster special powers or…” Rocks replied, acting like Trixie was some sort of stupid vagrant drunk on a drunken rant. “She means my human, she thinks he has magical powers that could change Equestria and that he’s secretly plotting to take over Equestria Ooo” I said, making it sound like a wild dragon tale. Rocks tried to stifle a laugh but couldn’t then began to burst into hysterical laughter. “Oh, oh that’s good, this is some sort of joke right? I mean we’re on TV right? Hello TV viewers” Rocks said and waved into the distance, acting like he was a movie actor breaking the fourth wall.

“Stop screwing around, this is federal business and I’ll have you arrested for withholding a criminal” Trixie threatened and Rocks stopped laughing then his face turned dire. “Oh my goddess… you’re actually for real? Oh I thought this was some sort of joke” Rocks said, his voice made me wonder if he hadn’t believed me either and simply disregarded the warning.

“Well in that case follow me I’ll bring you right to him. It’s Dash’s human you’re looking for right?” Rocks asked and we all followed him to a barn. “You know you guys are lucky, Dash was planning on selling him to the apple family farm because they recently put down their human cause it had a broken leg… but I’m sure Dash would be happy to sell you hers cause you’re with the government and all” Rocks replied as he opened the large barn doors and revealed a bunch of human slave workers, all of whom were working furiously hard.

“Dmitry, up and centre” Rocks called out and a ghastly looking human who looked to only be skin and bones scurried forward. If his face wasn’t the same I’d think it wasn’t even Dmitry, how the hell did they even get him to look like this anyway.

As Dmitry approached we could see his heat beat because of his fragile body frame. It almost made me want to cry how sickly he looked. One of the soldiers tried to hold in his lunch but couldn’t and bent over and began to puke.

“Well here he is, the uhm… one you guys were looking for. Are you sure it was Rainbow Dash’s human you were looking for?” Rocks asked uncertainly and Hammerhead pulled out the picture of Dmitry blasting the boulder away with the magical blast. Rocks looked at the picture, “Well that looks like his face… but it looks more like someone just took another picture and pasted Dmitry’s face over it” Rocks replied. “That’s ludacris, no-pony would do that, besides no picture like this one even exists” Trixie argued but Rocks pointed over to a portrait on the barn wall of a picture that looked identical to the one that the general was holding except it had a black man with a funky afro shooting the beam and the title read ‘If he can do it, so can you’. “Looks like whoever made this picture, took that one there and just recreated it with another body and Dmitry’s face” Rocks replied.

Trixie began to stammer frantically. “Sir this… I… I can explain the” she began but the general looked over to her and snarled. “Step outside Trixie” he said in a deep voice that would make a pony’s heart stop.

I quickly fluttered up to a window near the top of the barn and looked down at the duo as the general gave her an earful.

“You called me saying you had evidence and I fucking called Canterlot and warned them of a major threat in Equestria and got an entire fucking military company down here to find out THAT YOU FUCKING CREATED A FAKE FUCKING PHOTO OF SOME FUCKING SHRIMPY ASS MOTHER FUCKER AND TOLD ME HE WAS THE FUCKING GUY THAT WAS GOING TO DESTROY EQUESTRIA” the general screamed and Trixie didn’t even respond.

The general pointed to him soldiers “Stallions, move out, double time” the general yelled and turned back to Trixie. “I expect your full report and a formal apology to Celestia on my desk this afternoon” the general replied. “Yes sir” Trixie replied in a defeated voice and walked back to one of the military transports. I gave Trixie a wave “Goodbye special agent Trixie”