I told you to go right

I woke up in the middle of the night. It was weird, I never did that. But considering that Luna wanted nothing but rest after having to listen to one of Blueblood's speeches for a few hours, I was still awake. In fact, from what Luna knew about how much rest I'd ever need, she said I wouldn't 'need' rest for a maximum of 10 days before I started feeling actually tired. I decided I might sneak off for the night and go find something to do. Quietly, I rolled out if bed and looked over the stuff in my wardrobe. Weapons, hats, and miscs. I had opened a door containing TF2. I stared at all my options. Finally, I settled on a set I hadn't tried but had always wanted to.
I didn't put it on normally, oh no. I slammed my face into the pile of objects and came out with Dangeresque, Too? glasses that Medic had been given by Demoman, and a Bounty Hat. I grabbed my saddle bag and filled it with the Stout Shakos I had hoarded. Finally, I looked into the corner and saw my two weapons; a Chargin' Targe, and the almighty pan. I put those on and calmly marched out the door to the balcony. I gazed over ~~my empire of pan~~ Canterlot with the white shutter glasses obscuring lines into my vision. Nodding with an almost stupid expression on my face, I headed back inside and went out into the corridor. I received dodgy looks at my attire from the two Night-Guards. I put my Demopan face on and looked to one. Sharply, and causing him to recoil, I offered out my pan with the Stout Shako on it.
"-obvious joke-" I proudly declared. He gave a blank stare, his bat-like eyes trying to find some sort of humour in it.
"Erm...no thanks." he replied in an authorative voice.
"Demopan?" I asked.
"Yes, sir. That is a pan." he replied.
"Yus!" I said finally, before charging down the corridor. I had many Shakos to sell, and those two idiots couldn't stop the Thunderpan.

I trotted home with my saddle bags laden with diamonds and rare metals. Evidently they were popular hats, and I sold a good fourth of them. Bear in mind I'm in a cartoon, don't even ask how I fit all of them in there. And it isn't even worth asking why the ponies who bought them were
A) Willing to buy Stout Shakos from a stallion with a frying pan, shield, pirate hat and shutter glasses, and
B) Even awake in the first place.
Anyway, I made a fair few bob from that, and I could boast to Inferno that I'm a better Demopan than he was in TF2, because I sold more Shakos.

"Thunder, what are you wearing?" Luna groaned as she woke up to me coming in with my amazing clothes.
"Demopan?" I replied, staring at her. She gave a tired look, and lay back down from her sitting up position next to Nightmare.
"OK, fine, have fun." she yawned, before placing her hoof on Nightmare's flank. The misty mare emitted a quiet murmur and placed her own hoof on Luna's-

Once that was out of my system, I began to patrol the streets with my usual equipment; Cowboy hat (Now with blue Team Spirit Trophy Belt!), jacket, Tooth Kickers (Team Spirited!), Loch and Load, my trusted weapon Flip, and the Eyelander. I still had just two heads. It was cold, but I wasn't as tired as normal for some reason. Maybe it was all the late nights and early rises. I had both eyes narrowed as I trotted down the streets looking for Changelings. Nothing stuck out that much, but as I passed the alleyway where my brother had parked his van, I paused. Coming from inside was the sound of two voices, one male, one Vinyl's. I rolled my eyes and continued.

"You." a female voice said from behind me. I stopped, and carried on looking straight ahead. "Halt."
"Yer makin' a mistake, lass." I chuckled calmly. "Whit ye see on me back is nothin' o'her than the accursed Eyelander, a haun'ed blade forged fer generations in the bowels o' captured English knights. Right now I'd only 'ad two heads, but if you don't back off I'll make it three."
"You may try, but there'd be no fun for you later in the year." I turned, and the mare in question had light blue hooves, and horn, and a long black hooded cloak over her head. I recognised the voice. She levitated over a small piece of paper with directions...from my house in Ponyville to a cemetery?
"Who the bloody hell are ye, lass?" I asked, staring at the page.
"Go there on Nightmare Night. That is all." With that, the mare faded, leaving me shitting myself because I'd met a ghost.

"Thunder?" Twilight asked at the breakfast bar the next morning. "You look like you've seen a ghost."
"I did."
"You didn't."
"I did."
WHAM
"Thunder, calm down."
"Celestia, you just slapped me."
"Because it's fun."
"Slap something else."
"Like my bum? You know you like it."
"Ebony, slap her."
WHAM
"OHH! EBONY, DARLING! DO IT AGAIN TONIGHT, PLEASE!"
"Whelp, all eyes on us. Cheers, Celly."
"No problem."