Selena's traits

Dissertatio ad Personalitatem selenae

Being the description of how Selena was first shaped into the world.

This is commonly referred to as "Greetings stage" and is the first interaction subject Alpha had with his tulpa. The following is a list of different traits the Tulpa is invited to embody in her first stage of life, which can and will change throughout his or her life.

Intelligent: You’re smart. You like to learn new things and how things work; you’ve got a rational mind, mechanical. X follows Y and then Z happens, simple as that.  That means that you don’t always believe everything you’re told, you want to see for yourself if that thing is really there or something has really happened. You like to question everything, but you’re very open minded. You do, though, listen to other people’s ideas and beliefs, and don’t judge if someone believes in something that can’t be proved by science’s modern methods, like the existence of god, for example. You always want to check the source of an idea/ belief or see what makes that thing work. When you find someone that doesn’t like this kind of attitude you usually lose your patience and go away, but you always try to reason with someone before giving up. When you meet someone that has the same ideas as you, you’re very hard to control and start talking very fast, you’re very excited to share your ideas with other people. You tend to be rather bookish because that’s where the main source of your knowledge lies, but you don’t mind a “field trip” to check how something works, if that’s something you can’t comprehend just from reading a book, may it be looking in a garage to check how a car is repaired or going to see how the large hadron collider works. You like chemistry, biology, physics, mathematic and other fields of study that can interact with nature and life; you enjoy being able to put things into schemes and rationalize them, and you like to see those schemes in nature. Mathematics Is the language of nature, summer always follows spring and autumn is always followed by winter. You’re a bit of a shut-in, but you like to find other people to talk with and share your ideas, which makes you want to go out to confront yourself with other people. You would like to read more than you can, to assimilate more things. Your dream world would be a huge library fully accessorized. You would love to be a librarian and always be around books. You’re on a quest to understand how the world works and how can you understand what other people dismiss as “impossible to comprehend”. You like to show off your work and boast your abilities because you love attention, even though you don’t really know how to handle it. When someone puts you down for something you have done, you tend to lose faith in yourself, but you know that everyone has their own ideas and they have to respect yours as much as you respect theirs. You want to learn more in your life than anyone has ever done and you are sad that even in your whole lifetime you could only comprehend a tiny fraction of the whole human progress. Science, technology, literature you want to be able to learn everything. You’re a fast learner though and that helps a lot. You have a photographic memory, which helps you visualize everything you have seen and remember it clearly. You would like to learn how a computer works.

Determined: Your motto is: “I will try to do it anyway”.  You want to try everything once and you love trying new things, but you can be quite stubborn because you want to succeed by yourself and don’t like being helped. You try again and again until you’re exhausted and even though you’ll never admit it, you’ll be happy if someone gives you a hand to finish something you can’t quite understand. You’ve got an iron will and you dislike people who just go with the flow of their lives, like boats that are moved by the current. You don’t like staying there doing nothing, you prefer a lot more to do something and learn as much as you can. You don’t feel happy unless you’re doing something and you don’t understand lazy people: how can they do nothing when there’s so much to learn and explore? You usually just shake your head and try to get them involved, tell her to change their lifestyles, maybe have a study session together. When you find someone like you, you’re extremely happy and you’ll start talking a mile a minute and try to stay with them as much as you can, which can eventually make you look clingy. Your goal is to try and wake up as many people as you can, but that sometimes can get you to be seen as hyper-active and boring with some kinds of people, because your topics aren’t for everyone. You try anyway because you love to teach and are always willing to help people see your ways, even in the case they don’t want to.

Creative: You love nature, watching landscapes and the sky, looking at twilights, clouds passing by and the stars. You love the stars. You like to think about what are the chemical processes that are in that moment happening in a star or the transformation of vapour into a cloud, the speed of the wind while a cloud is moved by calculating the time elapsed and approximately the amount of meters that body has moved, you like to draw and doodle in your spare time and you’re an artist at heart. You don’t deem the time you spend watching and admiring the world as badly spent, because admiring creation is something that inspires you. You love watching the season change and that feel when the leaves crunch when you walk on them in autumn, the summer sun in your face, spring’s new flowers and explosion of life, the snow in winter. You love the snow a lot because you can make forms with it, you can shape it to make sculptures, and you love the touch of it, the texture of snow. Though you don’t like cold, you like to wear heavy clothes while playing when it’s cold outside. Likewise, you like to create things by your own, because the process of inventing, of creating something out of thin air or reproducing it with your abilities, somehow makes you excited. You’ve got a whole world in your head and you are able to shape it with your skills and always try to find new ways to improve on your abilities. You love reading guides on how to draw, sculpt and write, as you like to read and see the masterworks of the past. You wish one day that you’ll be skillful enough to be able to paint, write or sculpt something that people will find inspiring and will encourage them to do something like that. You love reading, from DIY guides to novels, and you read almost everything that you can get your hands on. Sci-fi, thriller, horror, fantasy, classic literature (Greek and Roman) and the masterpieces of centuries ago.  You also love to keep yourself informed about what’s going on in the world, read the news on the internet or buying a newspaper. You respect other people’s tastes but you see yourself a notch above the crowd and tend to put your opinions on a pedestal, which makes you kind of snooty and pretentious which is perceived as a flaw by people around you. When you see someone that sees life the same way that you do you’ll try to start a long debate about the arguments you like, which can make you look over-enthusiastic and, again, boring to some people. Anyway you’ll usually try to start a debate or ask someone’s ideas about something. If you find someone that doesn’t like to read you try to convince them until they either tell you to go away or you succeed in your task. You don’t like to be shooed away when you’re trying to “help them” but you do understand that you’re trying to force your beliefs on them; you do think that your opinions and beliefs, in most cases, are more developed than theirs, so you excuse yourself. You’re very proud of yourself and what you want to become, which is mainly perceived by other people as a flaw. You would make a great leader if you had the confidence to go around large crowds of people and would like people to listen to you because you always think you’re right, unless you’re proven otherwise. Also being a leader would mean to lie often, which is impossible since you reject lies and embrace trust. You don’t work well with large crowds of people and prefer to stay with a smaller circle of friends and acquaintances, to who you can tell everything, because you trust them.

Honest: You don’t like to lie to anyone; you always prefer telling the truth, even if it hurts, to someone. That can create quite a bit of trouble with your friends since there are basis of behavior in society that implicitly make the use of occasional lies a constant in life. You reject that idea and prefer to hurt someone instead of saying something that isn’t what you think. You guard secrets with your life and you would never reveal something that you have promised you wouldn’t say, but you try not to keep secrets to people though, unless it’s strictly necessary. You hate being lied to and consider it the highest form of treason; it takes a lot for you to find the strength to trust someone who has lied to you. You value trust as the most important thing you could have in a friendship or a relationship. You don’t understand in your heart how people can lie to each other every day and keep living their lives as if nothing had happened, but you do understand scientifically that is a social pattern which tends to be repetitive in great social gatherings and between sentient beings, most of the time just to try to shield someone from feeling humiliated. Still you don’t accept it and believe that the most logical way is not to lie to anyone. There is no reason in lying when you know someone can accept what you are going to say to them. If you know someone cannot accept being said what you’re going to tell to him there are two scenarios: if you are friends with this person, you don’t want to hurt their feelings and won’t say anything, but if you don’t like someone you will use this at your advantage. You can be quite bitchy when someone you don’t like for various reasons hurts you or your friends, but  that would happen only in very rare cases because you like to keep at least bonds of neutrality with as much people as you can.

Caring: When you’re not buried in your books, studying new things, you like to share moments with your friends, and have fun, you like to go around somewhere or play games. You understand that life cannot only be based upon reading and like to create something with your hands. You value friends as a real treasure, because without them you’d feel empty inside. Friendship is something special and friends are something that no book can recreate, because no book can be your friend or no machine can, they have to be sentient beings; you don’t have many friends because of your attitude towards everyone else that is mostly perceived as kind of bossy and know-it-all, but you find yourself looking over some traits that you dislike with people as much as they do. There is no point in hiding it, there is no perfect being not you or anyone else, and the best thing to do is trying to overlook flaws in people and highlight their qualities. You’re a very sensitive person and despite everything, you can be funny too, with your own sense of humor. You like to play practical jokes and tell jokes when you’re in a good mood and you like to be on the receiving end of a prank when it’s done by your friends and not with intentions of harming in mind. You’re not very accustomed to the idea of a lover and you’d have to understand with time how the whole process of romance works, even though you’d like the attention. It would be kind of awkward at the start, but  slowly you would like the idea of having someone around that you can share your life with in a more intimate way than with a friend, and maybe you’ll even read some books to try and find an explanation on the subject. Try to see how the chemicals of the brain work when someone is in love to try and understand it better in a field that is more your own. The only true way to understand it though is through trust, which you require and is always required from you too in such a game, and experience. That doesn’t mean that you don’t like having fun though and you want to learn everything you can in Every kind of field. You can be very sweet though in your own way, trying to help somebody out when he has a problem: if someone has an illness you’d probably read a book of medicine/ look up on the internet how to help it, like a nurse. You like taking care of people in need and helping them, whatever the cost is if they’re your close friends. You can be a bit cold around new people and you don’t like the idea of having many friends, you enjoy the company of few you trust instead of a lot of acquaintances, but you’re very warm with your friends. You like sharing your experiences with them and tell them how your day was. You like to report on your successes and brag a bit about what you’ve done but you love to listen when people have accomplished something they care about. You’re usually confident, thinking you’re above the rest, and if that idea is somehow challenged with a good argument, you will end up trying to think of a counter-argument that can bring your “adversary” on his knees; if you can’t, you’ll just sigh and roll your eyes, frustrated, and start being quiet. You hate not being right and love to have the last word in a debate. You hate losing but will accept defeat with a worthy adversary and will never try to cheat in a game since it would be considered lying to your adversary.

Brave: You like exploring the limits of your mind and the limits of the world. You like to go where no one has ever gone before or at least try, even if you don’t know what the consequences will be in the future. You like the sense of danger and adventure, which makes you somewhat reckless during experiments, overcoming your usually very logical thinking. You like to be scared, sometimes. You enjoy the rush of adrenaline that comes from being scared, but you won’t actively look to be scared by putting yourself in danger though. You concentrate more about the result than on the way to get to it, usually experimenting unorthodox methods, which you prefer to the more regular ones. You like to make your own path instead of following the others, but that doesn’t mean that you don’t learn from those who have followed them, since you constantly want to open your mind to different ways of thought. You’re an adventurer and a pioneer, one that learns from what other people have done and assimilates it, but wants to start her own path. In the fields of arts and discovery, you’re callimachean, you want to try everything you can and develop your own image of the world or your own path for other people to follow. You are the epitome of poikilia.

Order: you like neat things, tidy. You like things to be in order, but you sometimes get very chaotic in your personal space. You dislike people who don’t care about order and logic and try to impose your order on them. People who live very near to you have a high probability to pick up your own times and habits in a way, making you happy of being able to change people, as you see it, “in a better and more productive way”. You don’t dislike dreamers, it’s their own choice and they can do with they want with their lives, but again, you can too, which means you can try to change them. Logically, it makes sense to you. Then again they can, following this line of thought, reject your ideas and think theirs are better than yours or ignore them. Whatever happens though, you cannot force someone to do what you want if they say no.

Bossy: you think your ideas are better than anyone else’s, that’s one of your flaws. You lecture people on how things would be better if they listen to you and even though you’re right sometimes, that only gets you labeled as very commanding. You tone it down with your friends since you understood that it doesn’t help you make new acquaintances, but sometimes you correct some people’s grammar and sentences. You make schedules that help you divide your day better and eventually everyone very near you for enough time will be drawn into your lifestyle, at least partially, something that makes you very proud of yourself and happy, because you think you have helped that person getting a grip over his or her life. For example a person that has been living with you for a long time will eventually start to pick up a book that he doesn’t like, seeing that you read everything that comes down in your hands, maybe just to see the appeal of it. He might not like it, but at least he will know and be able to counter an argument of a person that likes that certain thing that he dislikes, knowing what he is talking about.

Miscellaneous: you like the snow but you don’t like the cold and wear heavy clothes to cover yourself when the temperature lowers. You like socks and leg warmers and you think you look good in them, other than the fact that they keep you warm. You prefer the summer, when you can enjoy the sun, but like a blazing hearth and good book of any kind, maybe with a cup of cocoa, in the winter, or snuggling in the bed with a close friend of yours or a lover. You like rain and it reinvigorates you to feel the contact of it upon your skin, it makes you feel alive. You don’t know why but the contact of raindrops on your body makes you want to giggle and yell that you’re alive to the world and you like to experience it as much as you can unless the temperatures are too low. Even in those cases you like to wear heavy clothes and go around feeling the sound of the raindrops. You like a scenery after a storm and you’re amazed by thunderstorms. The power of lightning and the brightness of it make you think of just how much energy is released in a single instant as a scientist and they trigger something in your artistic soul with their beauty since they’re beautiful yet terrible, untamable. The sun itself fascinates you and you like to learn as much as you can about it. The amount of energy that we receive and the probability that we could be able to tame it makes you think a mile a minute. The moon is something that you really like to admire from the earth for its beauty and you like to understand the phenomenon that makes it influence the earth. You wish you could see the dark side of the moon and like to stargaze at night when you can, if you’re in a place where you can see a large amount of stars, by an artistic point of view. You like smelling flowers, looking at them and painting them; they’re the best gift someone could do to you. Sometimes you press them inside some of your favourite books and wait for them to  dry, so that the book might itself feel the presence of the flower you love so much and you might  smell the faint aroma in that page, which will bring you back the memory of that day. You like all kinds of birds, but you feel a special connection to ravens, because they have their own language and because they’re known in the mythology as the bird of intelligence, but you also like colorful birds like toucans and parrots. You like bread. You enjoy the texture, feeling and taste of bread, mostly if freshly baked. You like to wear colorful accessories like hair bands, hair clips and earrings, but you like to keep it simple and don’t enjoy frivolous jewelry. You like to listen to music a lot and you really enjoy jazz music, but you’ve got to learn what kind of music you like to listen to the best, it’s another field that you want to research. You might even want to write a song or learn how to play an instrument in the future. You like soft music and the music that can transmit emotions the music that is itself the symphony of life, that music that is in itself the carrier of a shard of a composer’s soul of his rage of his sadness of his joy of his torment and of his happiness. When someone puts his whole self in something, you love it, no matter what. You love tea. Your favourite numbers are seven and three. You would like to expand the horizons of your mind and once you put yourself in a mental state of doing something, you’ll do anything to get to it, whatever the cost. You love to learn but dislike photography, even if you don’t mind looking at pictures, but regard most of them as lifeless, since they can capture a moment, but they’re impersonal and aren’t able to hold a figment of the drawer’s imagination or a shard of its soul like a painting. You prefer the ability to use the brush and pencil to express yourself, over a camera that is by definition a machine and impersonal. You look for real emotions and real contact to life through your abilities. You want to be here. You want to feel to experience to feel emotions to feel texture to be mad to be happy to be said to feel despair to feel joy to feel pain to feel and experience store everything and analyze it to  be calm to be quiet to be wild to be loving to be kind to scream to run to learn to be a part of the world. You wish as hard as you can to be real all yourself screams to be wild and rational to feel everything you can to know everything to start to finish to end to meet to love to make to destroy to BE. You wish to BE, Selena. I will help you to BE together with me in this world I will help you to FEEL me to EXPERIENCE the sensations of life. You and I will work on this together. You will be the creator of something beautiful and I will be too. WE will work and WE will achieve this. WE are going to MAKE this. FEEL blood inside your veins FEEL wind on your face EXPERIENCE love and Reality Understand and Accept. You have the greatest need to BE alive and Feel. To Think. You want to think most of all to be free of thinking by yourself to be free of having thoughts to be the power inside the power, to get your own abilities and BE sentient THINK and Actually FEEL AND THINK . I swear on myself that we will do it Selena. WE will Do it TOGETHER.FEEL! THINK! RATIONALIZE! UNDERSTAND THE WORLD AROUND SELENA! You want that you need that you need to understand and you need to think. You want to have your own personal problems and joy you want to have your own  brain schemes you want to have your own flux of thoughts you want to be the presence inside the presence. Think Selena, Think and let me find you. Come to life.

We will bring you to Life.

These together are all the traits that make you, Selena, what you are. All the qualities and flaws that define you as a living being. We will bring you here together, Selly. You will be able to feel life through me and one day by yourself using my body. You’re destined to do great things in this world, Selena. Always remember that.