For the Glory and Honor, of the U.C.o.E.

Forenote: ok the side chapter I started to write was getting way to complex for it to be put up any time soon so you get a few (bad) jokes and some back story.

Side chapter 1: U.N. LOLs

U.N. headquarters New York City,

August 5th 2021, 3 days after the end of World War 3:

The speaker stood up before the general assembly. The war was over and it was time to mend the damage that had been done. “The chair opens the primary speaker’s list.”

The representative of Australia raised his placard, and upon permission from the speaker, stood up and presented his case. “Australia would like to open debate on the post war status of the world.”

“Ok then, one speaker for?” the representative from Canada raised his placard. “one speaker against?” Anarchist China’s representative raised his placard.

The rep. of Canada stood up to make his argument. “We need to look at what has happened to the world, since our eyes where focused on the battles, and we may have missed important development and war consequences else where. Also I find the fact that most of Eastern Europe is missing greatly concerning.”

The Chinese rep. stood up to make his argument. “Anarchist China would like to remind the nations of the world that we were the victims of the old government’s actions, and we were hurt by the U.S.’s nukes just as much as they where so we believe that focusing on those most affected is what is right.”

“All in favor of opening debate on the post war status of the world?” all countries minus China raised their placards. “all against?” China raises his. “This motion clearly passes. The secondary speaking list is now open.”

The representative of the US raised his placard. “Point of information, as the US has yet to sign on with the UN war crimes tribunal our generals can’t be put on trial for  any atrocities committed during the war, especially any involving nuclear weapons and enhanced interrogation methods.”

The Russian rep. raised her placard. “Point of information, we are now the Russian Federal empire, and after the “I’m tired of being little wars”, the aforementioned Eastern European countries were concurred and subjugated into the empire.”

The Iranian representative raised his placard. “We wiped out the Zionist regime!”

These three points seemed to be an explosive mixture as when the Rwandan representative yelled out of turn “What the fuck happened?!” the room exploded into yelling, arguing, and a couple declaration’s of war. This is not how a UN meeting should go, the speaker thought to himself, this was chaos, this was… well bad…

All that stopped when the lights flickered, and a tall pale man in a black suit stood in the center of the room. In response the US representative pulled an M-16 out of the potted plant nearest his desk. “What do you know a rifle behind every blade of grass.” The Italian representative said.

“8 behind every bush.” The US rep. added.

“There is no need to be alarmed. I simply want to prevent you humans from exterminating your selves. If you will let me, I wish to assume the permanent role of chairman of the United Nations of earth” The being said, revealing it’s tentacles.

The Speaker stood up. “You know in light of this meeting, why the fuck not? Resolution passed!” This was met with awkward clapping, odd looks, and the US representative complaining about dirt jamming his firing chamber, and the Russian stating that he should have used an AK instead if he was going to bury it in a potted plant.

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AN:

just a silly thing I came up with last minute. Next up is the Homecoming saga part 1, aka back to the main story.

I like how I finally got to put my MUN stuff to use.