What You Wish For 3: The Book of Earth Pony

Alex swung the door open; light from the outside poured in and blinded him slightly as his pale skin began to burn in the direct sunlight. As he took a step forward, the entire crew looked his way as he said with a grin, “I’m back, baby.”

The crew gave each other looks of confusion, not understanding what Alex was talking about after being alone for only thirty minutes. Fluttershy cleared her throat, “Alex,” she began, “what are you talking about?”

Alex, not even understanding himself, shrugged, “Iunno,” was all he could say, “guess I felt like I had been away longer than I thought.”

Suddenly, the boat tipped upward, the ponies and people staggered, rolled, and tumbled backwards as a large exploding noise rocked the ocean. Screams could be heard right and left as Mike and Alex stepped towards the bow to see what the commotion was all about, what followed shocked the two of them. Making its way up, breaching the water slowly and causing waves as tall as buildings to disperse in all directions, was what appeared to be a man crossed with a squid, its roar shook the heavens and sent violent chills down everyone’s spines. The figure continued to rise above the world, reaching a height too great to be a mere natural creature, no, this was something god-like. It fixated its piercing greenish yellow eyes upon the ship as it roared once more.

For the first time ever, Mike shat his pants.

Alex simply smiled as he said through a toothy grin, “Cthulu, god of all gods.” He then proceeded to walk off the edge of the ship, floating in the air as though an invisible staircase guided him upwards towards its eyes. As Alex reached the face, he could see pieces of other ships from hundreds of thousands of years ago once lucky enough to be consumed by the great Cthulu. He also noticed pieces of Earth-like ships stuck in its yellow teeth, ranging from the 80’s battleships to more current attacking military. This gave Alex a brilliant idea, he slowly bowed before the damned god as he shouted, “Oh great Cthulu, hear my beg for help.”

The giant creature simply looked at Alex as it said in a thunderous yet slightly Scottish accent, more like Sean Connery’s not like Mike Meyers (by the way, have you heard they are making a fourth Austin Powers, sorry getting off track here), it said to the human before it, “You can cut the crap, human, I know you only want me on your side to overthrow Equestria in order to kill Alex, Lauren, and Mike, and the answer is still no.”

Alex raised his head, his eyes filled with surprize as he stuttered, “You… you don’t speak like a god.”

“You don’t speak like one either so I guess we’re even. Still my answer is and always will be no.”

The boy looked towards his crew, they simply gestured him to keep talking. Alex darted his eyes back at Cthulu’s as he said nervously, “Anyways, you are actually speaking to Alex himself.”

“Ah, Alex Mulroney,” said the god, “I have heard a lot of things about you.”

Alex nodded as he replied, “And I of you, I hear you are very powerful.”

Cthulu shook its head as a depressed look spread across its visage, “Not anymore,” it began, “your fellow humans drained me of my power to fuel their ships and weapons of mass destruction. They said it was all part of a plan to make sure you don’t survive.”

“What do you mean?”

“The humans, the plan on making sure there’s no possibility you survive what is to come.”

“Meaning what exactly?” Alex began to worry, this plan was sounding worse by the minute.”

“I don’t fucking know,” growled the beast, “Something about a bomb or something.”

That’s when it hit Alex, “Oh god,” he began, “we have to get back to Equestria right away!” Alex shouted towards the boat as he quickly made his way down. Before he embarked on the boat, he turned to Cthulu as he asked, “If my thoughts are correct, and my plans work, will you be on our side when we need you?”

Cthulu nodded, “Of course,” it began, “The humans do not belong here if they are wielding weapons as dangerous as they are. I serve only for what I believe is right and to rid this planet of the humans is what I believe is right.”

Alex nodded his head before turning around and pointing at the captain, “Get us home, now!”

Lauren stopped Alex as she worryingly asked, “What’s going on, Alex?”

Alex looked towards the group, took a deep breath and began, “The humans aren’t planning on finding me and killing me, or going to war, they plan on wiping this entire country off the face of the planet. Kyle used to work for the enemy as far as I know and he kept a Tzar Bomba in his basement. That shit could blow all of Equestria and its neighboring countries right off into space. The military is used mainly for distraction; I’m betting most of the soldiers don’t even know what’s going on. We have to get back home so I can stop this. Then the rest of you go and find the Book of Earth Pony. If all goes as planned, I will sacrifice myself in order to save everyone I love.”

Fluttershy began to tear up as she said, “No, you can’t do this!”

Alex looked down at her, “Either way, I’m going to die whether by nuclear fallout or by execution and I’d rather go with the option involving the least amount of casualties. I’m doing this because I love you. I’m doing this because I love you all. My days are numbered now, counting down to a day that will be remembered forever.”