derp if i know

I had fallen asleep in my bed. I didn't want to dream about her, but I did. My dream was basically a continued replay of different ways that she would destroy something next. Everything from putting a gapping hole in the wall, to flying away, falling, then breaking her neck. If she ever breaks something really important, or gets a fatal disease, I dont know what i'll do. I can't take her to medical help. She'll just get taken away or something. I'd then probably go to jail for some shit reason like, "You are guilty of owning an endangered species" when derpy isn't endangered if she can't physicaly exist, but there she is!

I'm currently dreaming about her setting the house on fire. It is so realistic. I can actually her the blazing fire. Oh no! I'm trapped. I cant get out! Help!

suddenly I am splashed by water. But wait. This isn't dream water. This is real! My eyes quickly open to see Derpy hopping up and down on top of me. Her hair is all messed up and She is soaking wet. She's yelling " Water! Water Water!" over and over again. In the background I can hear a loud SSSHHHHH sound.

I jump out of bed, flinging Derpy off of me and across the room. She lands in my pile of clean clothes in the corner of the room, then jumps right up again, runs aeound in a circle a few times, and falls over. Her eyes in actual X's. I stumble around for a second, being that I just awoke, then sprint out the door. First thing I feel when I boost out the door is water rushing around my feet. AAAHHH! COLD!

I look over to where the water is coming from. The bathroom. The door had shut because of water currents. I walk over to the door, my feet tickling from the rushing, cold water. All I can do is pray that it doesn't go cartoon style where I open the door and it floods out nocking me over as the water runs over me.

I quickly open the door and look in. The water does rush out, but not cartoon style. Well... almost. The water is up to my thighs. It soaks my shorts and flows past me. I do wobble a bit to try and hold my self back. Just that moment, derpy comes running around the corner from my room and is swept away by the currents. She goes wee down the hall until I hear a bang and she starts crying real loud.

I push my way through into the bathroom and see the bath tub overflowing with water. I reach for the nob that controls the flow and turn it off then slip, bang my head, and pass out.

"Wake up!" I can hear a higher pitched voice say. "Please! Wake up!" my eyes flutter open and I can feel derpy to my right. Her hooves are on my side and I can hear her breaking down. I roll to my side so that I may see her and I feel a sharp pain in my head. Major headache. She is looking down and tear drops are falling from her eyes. She's beating at the wet floor. each stop alittle splash. I reach over and put my hand on her head. She looks up at me with the saddest face in the world. her eyes are straight. She goes slowly from a frown to a smile and her eyes go wide and derp again. She jumps at me and I just stop her before she gets to me.

I stand up slowly while holding Derpy in one of my hands. I trip and almost drop her but catch her with the other hand. I look around. The floor is soaked and the bath tub is fille with water. I look down at the ground and see blood. My eyes go wide and I quickly examine derpy to make sure she is okay. She is fine but She is pointing at my forehead. I set her down and turn around and look at the mirror to see a large cut across my forehead with a big missing chunk of skin at the end of it. If I never knew that that was there, I would have been fine. but when I see it, I can feel it. It HURTS though I have to hide my pain so that derpy doesn't get any more scared. I push her out the door and close it behind me.

God bless the day that she doesn't break, hurt, destroy, or cost me anything. I pray for that day. Which is wierd because I don't believe in god. I don't want to hurt derpy. but if she continues, im going to have to punish her. What's really bad is that I don't think she even knows that she is doing it.

I open the door back up and see derpy dragging a towel across the hall. She turns over to me and looks up at my forehead, then back to pulling the towel. I try to pick up the towel but she has a firm bite on the towel and comes along with. I take her into the living room and set her down next to the towel on the couch. Just before she can jump off the couch, I put my hand in front of her and say, "no." She turns back towards me and looks at me with her derpy eyes. I'm finding it hard to speak to her with her eyes like that, even more because she's cartoon.

"Okay, look. I'm finding it really hard to believe that you're not doing these sort of things on purpose. Could you please tell me what happend or why it happened." I said with a firm tone. Derpy looks down at her feet and speaks.

"Well, I woke up. I looked around. Saw big round thing. Hungry. Climbed up. Jumped at it. It went down. Then water came out of hole. Water cold. I couldn't get out of tub. Water filled tub. I swam out of tub. tub spilled out. I run for door. closes behind me. Water under door. try to stop it with hooves. nothing work. water everywhere. Run to you. Wake you up. Fly across room. run out room, pushed away by water when open door. hit head on table." She pauses and points over to the table that holds the TV. The TV's intact but the flower pot next to it is on the ground, shattered. Then I look at my cable box for the time. 6:47. Good. I still have to get to work. I think I will put her out side. make sure she cant get out of back yard. "I cry for a while. go into bathroom. See you on the floor. Blood everywhere." I stop her to let her know that she can go, Then point over to her bowl of water and cabbage. She rushes over to the cabbage and chows down. She's got alot to learn.