The Ways of the Heart

Another day, another report. Like my usual letters to Princess Celestia from back then, I kept a chronicle of my own experiences as the Princess of Friendship to keep track of everything. Usually, I would have Spike write them down for me while I paced around the room to kept my thoughts together. However, this one was a little more personal that I wanted to keep secret. I didn't want a single soul seeing this, not even Celestia or Luna. For that matter, I especially wanted to keep this a secret from Cadence and Shiny. Breathing a heavy sigh, I sat at my desk as my pen wrote every word down at my magic's command.

From the Studies of Twilight Sparkle, Equestrian Princess of Friendship

June 22, My 27th Birthday

I truly can't believe saying this, but I am honest-to-Celestia bored. this day has been nothing more than the same routine as the past three years. Find a friendship problem, fix a friendship problem, and write about it. Find a friendship problem, fix a friendship problem, and write about it. And you would think that my birthday would be a reason to celebrate around this time. But ever since that incident in Saddle Arabia, the world has just decided to stop sending disaster our way. Not that anypony would complain about not being some kind of war and want to see ponies die, but it would be nice to see something interesting once in a while. Something small like finding a surprise cake in the mail from Pinkie Pie or hearing a Sonic Rainboom in the distance. I suppose I can only wish to relive all the good times in Ponyville with my friends. But, I digress.

I suppose I’m writing this entry because I’m afraid of getting older. Faust dammit, I’m 27 and I still haven’t experienced much of anything that the rest of them have. Big Macintosh proposed to Fluttershy and I didn’t even find out about it until a few days ago! If only I could-

I had to stop myself from writing as I felt a new sensation in my horn. It would probably take at least a few hours to explain how it all works, but I had recently developed a spell that gave out a pulse every time there was a friendship quarrel anywhere in Equestria. I suppose a similar way to put it for humans would be feeling 'a disturbance in the Force' type of thing. The only difference this time was that it felt much closer than any other I had felt before. As the Princess of Friendship, it was and still is my solemn duty to resolve any troubles between that I can. So, without giving it a second thought, I rushed out to the outdoor balcony and leapt into the air. My horn began to guide me towards the disturbance, which would turn out to be one of the most important events of my life.

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Before we go any further, let me just clarify something. Remember when I said that we “stepped through the portal to the sounds of a bustling capital city”? That statement was to be taken literally. When we stepped through, we did hear the sounds of a bustling city. The only problem was that we weren't exactly in the bustling city. The long and short of it all is this.

Here’s a representation of Canterlot.

And I came to find out a few weeks after this incident that we were right....about...

There.

Get it? Got it? Good.

Now, Ron and I had noticed this when we first stepped through. We were expecting to be in Canterlot, but we panicked as soon as we saw the cliff. We backed away as far as we could from the ledge. We didn't know how far the drop was, but we could very well guess that it would kill us. We didn't even take long to guess that something was horribly wrong since we could see the tops of the city towers at eye level. I slowly slid down the wall until I was sitting on my butt and began to breathe heavily. The sounds of chatter coming from the city now felt like all the voices in the world mocking me and laughing at my misfortune. My mind was racing at a hundred miles a minute in response to everything that just went wrong. There were all of these complex things running through my head that I didn't even understand. I could've been coming up with a scientific explanation to magic for all I knew. And do you know what the first words that came out of my mouth were?

"Oh shit oh shit oh shit oh shit oh shit oh shit oh shit oh SHIT!!"

Brilliant, am I right? So, it's obvious to say that I was scared shitless. However, one does not simply have time to be scared shitless with someone like Ron around them. All of a sudden, he pulled me up by my shirt collar and pinned my back to the wall with strength that I didn't even know he had. He actually managed to knock the wind out of me, which still surprises me to this day. As I slowly recovered from my friend's spontaneous bout of violence, I noticed that his usual carefree expression was replaced this time by a look of pure rage.

"Mate," he began slowly. "What have you done?!" he then shouted at me full-force.

"How the hell should I know?!" I retorted back.

"Because it's all your bloody fault that we're in this mess!"

"Dude, I have no idea what you're talking about!"

"Don't you give me that load of bollocks. "You're the one who put the coordinates into the bloody station, so you put the wrong numbers in and stranded us on a goddamn mountain!"

At this point, Ron was starting to me angry too. I knew that I was innocent of anything and I would never blame either of us for this. And yet, my best friend was treating me like crap for something that I didn't do. I reached up and gripped his arms that were holding me back, and pulled them off of me. Using a wrestling maneuver, I quickly spun Ron around and pinned him to the wall using a great amount of strength to hold him back. Now that I had the advantage, I could speak freely without the risk of either of us getting hurt.

"Did you forget that you gave me the coordinates in the first place?!" I asked venomously.

"What do you mean?" Ron grunted.

"You figured out the coordinates for Canterlot and gave them to me, so you obviously made a mistake in the numbers. So, do me a favor and stop blaming me for something that isn't my fault!"

"Oh so now you're putting this all on me?!"

"Well, unless the station just decided to malfunction on its own, then yes! Now calm the fuck down and let's figure a way out of this!"

There was a long, tense silence between us before I felt Ron begin to relax. I slowly let off the pressure until I was completely off of Ron, but I kept my eyes on him in case he tried anything unsavory. He didn't move from that spot on the wall as he finally said to me, "For the record, I'm still blaming you."

"Is it anything that I can help with?" a new voice said.

There was a feminine tone to this new voice, which meant that it wasn't coming from either of us. I looked behind to try and find the source, but there was nothing. I checked every direction around me, but there was still nothing. It wasn't until the voice said, "Up here", that I finally saw it. Hovering above me was the figure of what appeared to be a Pegasus pony flapping its wings to stay aloft. I could make out s much because the figure was outlined directly in the center of the sun. It wasn't until I forced myself to look through the blinding light more carefully that I saw the horn on top of its head.

'Alicorn princess,' I thought as it finally clicked in my brain. As if by instinct I grabbed Ron from the wall, spun him around and pushed him down with me so that we were both in a seated bowing position.

"What the hell are you doing?" Ron whispered in confusion.

"Royalty," I whispered back. "Directly above us."

"...Seriously?"

"I shit you not."

He didn't say anything more, so I assumed that he understood what was going on. While it's common courtesy to bow before royalty, the honest truth was that I was afraid. I really didn't know if there were consequences for not treating your eternal protectors with respect. Most likely because I was never told of any by anyone or anypony. But from what I had heard of the Canterlot dungeons, it was better to be safe than sorry. I heard the sounds of two more wing-beats and hooves clopping against the ground.

“You may rise,” the voice said with sincerity. The two of us did so, and we finally had a good view of the Princess. Ron was definitely surprised, but more ecstatic than anything.

“Princess Twilight!” he said while rushing over to her. He kneeled down beside and began to talk to her. If you saw him, you’d think that he was a kid in a candy store.

For me, however, just looking at her for the first time did a number on me. Yes, I know I'm a human and it's normal for me to be attracted to human girls, but this pony was something else. Her pale mulberry coat, those magnificent wings, and her hair that no human could possibly pull off. For the first time in my life, I could do nothing less than breathlessly admire the beauty of this pony. The name ‘Princess Twilight’ rang in my ears, and I was able to quickly determine that this pony was the Birthday Mare of the day. And as if all of this information wasn’t enough for me to bare, there was something about the Princess that I couldn’t put my finger on but still came off as being familiar.

My thought process was interrupted by Ron via shaking the crap out of me. “I’ve got some amazing news, my friend!” That got my attention and I was all ears on him. “I’ve found a way that we can enjoy even more. The Princess has agreed to help us and give us free VIP access!”

All I could say was, "Have I ever told you how you are the greatest friend ever?"