Author's notes quotation marks "as such" mark dialogue parenthesis (as such) mark internal dialogue also know as thought brackets [as such] indicate something I, the author, am saying directly to you, the reader.
enjoy
I’ve been in Equestria for a few months now and I decide it’s about damn time I saw the wonders of this world. I gather my friends (Basically the Mane 6 the CMC and Ditzy Doo) to the library to tell them the news.
Everyponies reactions where along the lines of “Wait, WHAT?!” except for the CMC which was a collective “AWWWWWWW”
“Guys, I have been here for about eight weeks and all I’ve seen is Ponyville and Sweet Apple Acres. I wanna see the world. This doesn’t mean I’m going away for good though. I wouldn’t be able to handle not seeing you, but knowing that I am coming back will help.”
“Well y’all can’t go traveling’ around all by yourself, Can you sugarcube?” Give you four guesses who said that and the first six don’t count.
“Says who. I got two legs, two feet and last time I checked their perfectly fine. Besides the walking’ll do me good.”
“Well their’s only one thing to do.” said the pink pony
“Lemme guess a party” my voice dripped with sarcasm
“Nope that would be cliché.”
Now it was my turn “Wait WHAT?!”
“I have something for you, but you have to wait for tomorrow”
“Alright Pinkie, for you I’ll wait for tomorrow but afterwards I’m leaving.”
The rest of the day was pretty uneventful
“Man I’m beat, work is hard.” I say to nopony in particular
“Not as hard as cast iron.” Huh?
*CLUNK*
*Thud*
*Hours later*
“Ugh in the name of Celestia happened.”
“You left a dent in my frying pan.”
“WHO THE HELL’S THERE AND WHY THE FUCK AM I TIED UP?!”
“Simple first off it’s me.” Pinkie then walks into the light, but she’s off, her hair is straight instead of poofy and her pupils are pinpricks “Secondly your number got drawn.”
“WHAT NUMBER?!”
“Poni- er Humans can be so innocent.”
“PINKIE EXPL-”
“I’m not pinkie.”
“THEN WHO THE HELL ARE YOU AND WHAT DO YOU WANT WITH ME?”
“My name is Pinkamena Diane Pie, and I want you. To be specific I’m curious”
“About what?”
“Ever since you’ve gotten here I’ve wondered how humans taste” her gaze works it’s way down “and not just the flesh.”
“Oh shit.”
She slowly walks towards me somehow twirling a scalpel with her hoof. With a flourish of her hand my clothes fall off. (How am I going to explain this to Rarity, WHY AM I WONDERING THIS?) She grins with a smile that chills my blood. Then she gropes me. “Oh this is going to be fun. At least for me anyway.”
She lowered her body sliding down my torso and began to suck.
Oh god, my first and probably LAST time and it’s rape, GOD FUCKING DAMMIT.
Since it’s my first time I didn’t last long. Problem was I couldn’t enjoy it cause I was so pissed and scared.
“Humans taste so… different! But in an amazing way! Oh well time to get to business!”
“What business?”
“Oh you’ll see.” This was like ice in my veins.
She walked over to a table with a blanket over it, but she didn’t pull it off she sliced it open with the scalpel in the same fashion as my clothes that were now lying on the floor and the end result was the same, but instead of revealing my pale skin it revealed surgeon tools such as a bone saw and scalpels of different sizes but also random sharp bladed objects such as cleavers steak knives (Why do ponies need these?) and worst of all needles filled with some liquid *Shudder* [Even IRL I hate Needles] “Alright let’s get started!” She says this with such a happy tone yet I know she wants to kill me. Maybe even worse, Hell it is worse.
“Problem with you is that you don’t have anything you don’t have anything nonessential without major blood vessels… Oh wait, yes you do.” She then grabs a meat clever and begins to suck me again. (What the hell is she going to do now… hang on, OH SHIT)
“PINKIE STOP PLEASE DON’T”
She lifts her head with a smile and a wink and says “Too late” then she brings the cleaver down.
“AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH” the pain is unbearable yet somehow I stay conscious. (GODDAMMIT SHE CUT MY DICK OFF)
She opens her mouth drinking my blood with vigor for a second before wrapping me in a bandage.
“Can’t have you dying from blood loss can we now, at least not yet.”
“Pinkie”
“Yes?”
“Go to hell.”
“Oh I will but not yet.”
She grabbed another scalpel, this one bigger than the last and traced a square on my abdomen. “Oh wait almost forgot.” then, much to my horror, she grabbed the largest syringe on the table and walked behind me
“Pinkie what the hell are you doing?!” I would have yelled but I was dizzy from the blood loss.
“Keeping you conscious.” accentuating the word conscious with a syringe in my back
“Oops I missed your spine”
“IT’S CURVERD” [IRL too]
“Oh well that’s new. Well lets see.” she moves her hoof around my back “Ah there it is.” her voice dripping with masochistic pleasure.
“AAH FUCK!”
“Thankfully this solution is much more powerful than the one I used with Dashie”
“WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO WITH DASH”
“Pretty much the same thing as you except for the obvious exceptions. The same with the others.”
“What others.” my voice dripping with malice
“All of the other missing ponies.”
“HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN DOING THIS.”
“Oh I don’t know I lost track after the first three months.”
“Damn”
“Well that sedative should be done now.” (She was right I couldn’t feel anything below my heart)
She picked up the same scalpel as before but this time instead of tracing she applied pressure, (Oh damn this is so weird it should hurt so bad but I can’t feel a DAMN thing)
“Goddammit”
After she was done a flap of skin fell to the ground with a smack
“Oh my gosh there is so much of you your small intestines alone would be enough for FIVE cupcakes.
“wait CUPCAKES!”
“yes I don’t just kill ponies for the fun of it even if it is I cut them up and put them into special cupcakes and I use their skin for a dress… OH you would be enough for two dresses.”
“Pinkie you are demented”
“Why thank you.” She then took out his organs every time she took one out I lost more and more blood. Just when everything began to fade I had an adrenaline rush
“Pinkie I have one think to say”
“and that would be?”
“DIE” saying this I broke the restrain on my right arm and in the same motion slammed pinkie’s head on the table I was strapped to knocking her unconscious in the process
“May your soul wander this earth for eternity and never find the peace of the afterlife.” I say this and bring down my fist shattering her skull
“Thank you Celestia, thank you, thank, you….” then I breathed my last.
.... yeah, this was shit.
I think I've matured enough as a writer to try this again, and have it be good (relatively) this time.
Expect the redo (leaving the old ones up to show how far I've come), um, whenever I get around to it, but be expecting it!
Author's Note
this feels really awkward, for some reason
Alternate ending
Author’s notes: This is not my next fic (yes I am writing another one don’t know when it will be done. Hopefully it has a better response then this one did) I just felt as if it had a bittersweet ending and I wanted to end it in my special kind of way. How you ask? That’s for you to find out.
[This occurs after I break the bond on my arm but before I smash Pinkie’s head against the table]
“Oh I love it when they put up a fight” she says this while effortlessly stopping my arm with her hoof “it makes this so much more fun.” (Shit, no matter what I do I can’t stop her)
“You’re right you can’t stop me.”
“YOU CAN READ MINDS!”
“No I’ve just been doing this for so long I could tell what you were thinking.” (wait a minute I have an idea)
“Pinkie you do know there is one pony you can never turn into a cupcake.”
“Yes that would be myself.” [insert clip of the Hindenberg crash here]
“Oh I just had an idea!”
“Which would be” depression beginning to affect my tone [I have problems with depression IRL]
“I’m going to skin you alive” At hearing this the world fades into darkness
I come to on the same table but my bonds are redone and this time they are metal chains instead of leather straps
“Oh you’re back.”
“But how?”
“Twenty milliliters of concentrated adrenaline can do that to a body.”
“You really want to milk this to the end don’t you.”
“Of course I do, but before you die I will tell you one thing.”
“Which would be?”
“I know of a way to your world.”
“That isn’t possible!”
“Oh yes it is and I’m sure your family will taste just as good as you will.” (NO SHE CAN’T DO THIS I HAVE TO STOP HER. But how. I’m chained to this table, I’m missing more than a few of my organs, and the only thing keeping me alive is that adrenaline, which is, wearing off, damn it’s, getting, harder, to think)
“Oh looks like I better hurry. I used the last of the adrenaline to bring you back so once you’re gone. You’re gone.” The last thing I saw was Pinkie skipping over to the table to grab a long thin knife. “Aww, looks like I can’t skin you. Alive anyway.” she says to no one in particular “Oh well there will be plenty of other humans on your world. Yes I’m talking about you.”