My Little Spartan: Or, a Tale of Thundering Hooves

John was staring. He could understand that he had now been sucked into a world that was the complete antithesis of his very being. He was staring, because he was hoping that it would scare away the other ponies. Instead, they just kept on coming. Each one was eager to come up to him, and extend a han-, er, hoof, in friendship. Expressing weariness, he tried sitting in a far off corner. After several reminders that chairs and thousand pound super soldiers don't mix, he sat down upon the floor with a weary sigh.

"So, why don'cha tell us where y'all are from." John recognized the slow drawl as coming from the pony designated Applejack. Normally, telling anything about his past would result in an immediate court martial. Hyper lethal super soldier or not, ONI still had ways to make him feel pain. However, these were no ordinary circumstances, and from what he could tell, there was no ONI in Equestria. Fighting the urge to sigh out loud, he got to his feet so that all could hear.

"Well, my name is John-117. I am a SPARTAN II commando of the UNSC Naval Special Warfare Development Group. My world was plunged into a conflict against an alien collective known as the Covenant. They tried to kill us, so we killed them. Then, we found more aliens that tried killing the Covenant, the Flood. Those pus-bags would take over a body, and rewrite its genetic code. My closest friend was killed by a sentient light bulb. I killed things. Lots of things. Covenant, Flood, the occasional Marine; it didn't matter. All that mattered was that I was hyper-lethal, and no one could do a thing about it." John was pleased to note the growing look of horror on the faces of the Mane Six. Clearing his throat, he continued. "This other voice that you hear is my…friend…Cortana. I can always depend on her, eh Cortana?" This latest salutation went ignored. Frowning to himself, John pressed further. "Cortana?"

"Huh? Oh, what? Yeah." Cortana's late reply bothered John; not because it was late, but because of the hint of annoyance he could detect in her voice. Chalking it up to her Rampancy, he set his feeling of dread aside. Turning to the ponies once more, he continued with his previous oration.

"Now: any more questions?" Seeing that there were none, John decided that he had had enough. Shifting topics, he chose the one that he felt was the most important at the moment: sleep. Although he had been out for some time, cryo never felt the same as regular sleep. "Uhhh…do any of you know where I may sleep?" He noticed Applejack raise her hoof. Cocking his head in her direction, he waited for her to speak.

"Well, seein' as we got our barn, yer welcome to stay there, pard'ner."

"Thank you." And with that, they set off.

Presently, they arrived at Sweet Apple Acres. John looked at the surrounding area: chock full of apple trees, with a big red barn at the center. To his left, he could see a corn field. Surrounding the area was a white fence. It reminded him of old holovids of Earth he had seen when he was a boy. As they approached, John saw three more ponies. The biggest one, red in color, cautiously stalked towards them. In the background, a small, yellow filly cowered and huddled next to an elderly green pony.

"Applejack, who in the hay is this?" began the red pony.

"This is our new friend, er, John. John, this is my brother, Big MacIntosh" Chief and Big Mac both nodded towards each other. Although he towered over him, John had to give the pony credit for not backing down. Trying to break the awkwardness, Applejack continued. "Well, he's uh, new in town, and I thought it would be mighty generous if we offered him a place to stay. So, whaddaya say?"

"Nope." Applejack cringed, and looked pleadingly at her steadfast brother. However, the look in Big Mac's eyes was adamant; he would not yield to Applejack. John was just about ready to give up when Granny Smith spoke up.

"I reckon this here sonny can stay. Even if he is mighty strange lookin'. That don't mean it's all peaches and cream from there. He's a gonna hafta work mighty hard with our harvest, on account'a his stayin' and all."

"That sounds great, Granny," Applejack beamed. Turning to her brother once more, she nudged him. "Well big brother, Granny says it's okay. Whaddaya say now, huh? Please?" She tried what she hoped was a winning smile, waiting for her Big MacIntosh's response. Finally, Big Mac just bowed his head and muttered his trademark "Eeyup." With that, he stalked away. Granny Smith turned to John.

"I hope y'all don't mind him; He just ain't used to strangers is all. He's really a sweet colt." She turned to Apple Bloom, who was still staring up at John in awe. "C'mon ye silly filly," she beckoned. "It's time fer bed. I recon you must be plumb tuckered out. You too, Applejack. Get him set, then git on and hit the hay."

"Yes, Ma'am," came their response. As Apple Bloom headed in with Granny Smith, she took one last look at John.

"G'night," she whispered. John simply raised a hand in return. He then walked into the barn with Applejack.

"Er, it's not much," Applejack began, "But, yer a mighty big fella, and I reckoned this was the only place that you'd fit."

"Oh, of course he'll be fine," spoke Cortana. "Chief's grateful for the lodgings, right?"

"Affirmative."

"O-oookay then," said Applejack. "Now, I recommend y'all git some shuteye. Tomorrow, we need to start harvestin', and helpin's the only way Granny letcha stay." John nodded. With that, Applejack left. Suddenly, John was overcome with exhaustion. Lying down in the soft hay, he looked up at the ceiling and whistled. It sure had been a while since he could sleep normally. As he lay down, letting weariness overtake him, he heard Cortana whisper,

"Good night, John."

"Good night."

/

John awoke to a dreadful cacophony; he had never heard such a dreadful cry in his life. He got up, fully expecting to be surrounded by Grunts. Suddenly, light poured in. Crouching down, he poised himself to attack.

"Wake up buttercup!" came Applejack's cry. Chief, although still tense, relaxed. "What's wrong, John? Yer actin' like you've never heard a rooster before." Said rooster smiled at John, as Cortana giggled. "Anyways, it's harvestin' time. Y'all want any breakfast?"

"N-no thanks, I'll be fine," came his curt reply. "Now; how do I harvest apples?"

"Well, ain't it obvious? You just get 'em down from the tree, an' put 'em in this here barrel. It's easier'n teachin' a greased lightnin' bolt to skedaddle all quick like."

"What. Never mind. I'll just…start harvesting." John picked up the barrel, hefted it over his shoulder, then moved to an apple tree. Once there, he proceeded to pick apples out of the tree. Bit by bit, he worked on the tree. When he had finally finished, he looked towards Sweet Apple Acres. Score more of apple trees dotted the landscape. He groaned, staring out at the wide layout.

"Y'know, it'd be easier to just buck at the tree then whatever it is yer doin'. What with yer fancy. hooves an' all." Applejack gestured towards his gauntleted hands. "Say, are you part dragon?" Sensing his confusion, she hurriedly changed the subject. "Never mind. Now; buckin'." She walked over to a nearby tree, lifted up her hind quarters, and kicked. With one buck, she loosened most of the apples. "Yeehaw! Once ya get the hang of it, it's easy as, well, apple pie!" Nodding, John positioned himself closer to the tree.

"Remember," Cortana whispered, you can't damage the tree.

"I know," he whispered back. Evaluating his stance, he prepared himself. Years of combat training had not only made him proficient in weapons based fighting. Like all other SPARTANs, he had been trained to be a dangerous weapon with only his hands. And like all other SPARTANs, he had been trained to regulate that strength. Scan your opponent. Look for weak spots. Exploit those weaknesses. Focus. Control. With this, he took a deep breath. Focus. RELEASE! With this last part, his arm shot out like rocket, as he backhanded the tree. The tree rumbled. Moving quickly, John picked up the barrel. With Cortana's help, he was able to calculate when the apples would fall. Moving quickly, he caught each and every apple in the barrel.

"Very good," laughed Cortana. "And now, add in a little flair; take a bow!" For her sake, John complied.

"Wh-what in tarnation? That there was one of the most absolutely astounding displays of apple buckin' I ever did see! She-oot! That there's some mighty fine work!" In spite of himself, John grinned. He abruptly caught himself, and went back to scowling. Although it was good to finally be doing something physical again, he still had the feeling that he was in for a long, monotonous time. The ease with which he removed the apples practically screamed boredom. Nevertheless, he couldn't help but feel pleased that he had done something to help out. However, there was still work to be done. In this manner John continued, moving from one tree to the next.

It was some time before they had finished. When they finally did, John leaned against a tree and surveyed their handiwork. All the while, Applejack clamored about how they had harvested the apples in record time. John grunted in acknowledgement. As John surveyed the landscape, he noticed a yellow filly gallop towards the farm. Not only did he notice the presence of tears in her eyes, but a black eye as well. His interest piqued, he turned his attention toward Apple Bloom. However, at this point it was more just an interest in something that actually caused physical harm. As he watched, he saw two more fillies pull up: An orange pegasus, and a white unicorn. Judging by their concerned expressions, he could tell that they were friends of Apple Bloom.

"C'mon, Apple Bloom," began the orange one. "We've all been through this before. So what if they made fun of you for not getting your Cutie Mark? There are loads of other foals without their Cutie Marks."

"Yeah, cheer up Apple Bloom." This time, the white unicorn chimed in. "Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon are just a couple of no good bullies. You're better than them."

"Ah know, ah know," sniffed Apple Bloom. "But this time was diff'rent. This time, they made fun o' mah kin. Tain't the right thing to do. Then, they went an' punched me in mah face. When ah tried t' fight back, Cheerilee got mad at me fer fightin'. I dint do nothin'!"

"We have to help her," Cortana whispered. John grunted.

"She needs to learn how to fend for herself. When I was her age, I already knew twenty three different ways to kill a man. I know it sounds harsh, but Apple Bloom lives in a dangerous world. Even if it is full of technicolored horses, she will still come across some adversity." Cortana was not to be placated so easily, however. In fact, she was infuriated.

"How dare you," she hissed. "You took an oath to protect and defend those weaker than you. Are you just going to sacrifice who you are? Why do you refuse to help her?"

"Cortana, it's a horse."

"She's a horse. With feelings. That's the same as saying I don't have feelings because I'm…I'm a machine…" This actually caused John to pause. "You're always there to help me, aren't you? Listen John; I know you hate being stuck in this place. I know you want to just go far far away, and destroy Ponyville with a MAC gun. But, you just can't do that. You might not like them, but they love and tolerate you. Why can't you just do the same?" John scoffed.

"Right, and the magic of friendship is just somehow going to make me realize all this."

"Yes," whispered Cortana. "Don't you understand? Open yourself to the magic. Love and tolerate." John was just about to retort in kind when suddenly, he felt stab in the heart. It wasn't a physical stab; rather, more like a stab from the metaphysical universe that transcends the material one. However, rather than being enlightened by the magic of friendship, John could only think one thing: Argh, damn! Ugh…magic hurts…

"Damn," John whispered. "Cortana, you always knew how to rope me into doing crazy things I would never do under normal circumstances. Fine, I'll do it." As Cortana was about to reply, he cut her off. "But I don't think that was the Magic of Friendship. More like the magic of a guilt trip." He could feel Cortana smirk at that. With that, he walked over to Apple Bloom. While before he had made sure to remain unseen, this time he made no move to conceal his heavy footsteps. Diamond and Silver looked up at him, stunned. Taking pleasure in the sweet silence of fools aware of their impending doom, he calmly nodded his head towards Apple Bloom. "Having trouble, ma'am?" With this, he cracked his knuckles. Turning away from Diamond and Silver, he stood akimbo, and continued their . "Now, you two gals wouldn't happen to be causing trouble for Apple Bloom, would you? I'd hate for there to be trouble. Or, maybe I do want trouble." With this last part, he whirled around to face them. The last part was spoken in a growl.

"For your sake, I suggest there be no trouble girls," interrupted Cortana. "John has certain…urges…namely a desire to eliminate any and all life that he perceives as an annoyance. Now, he hasn't had time to act out on that urge; anything could set him off, m'kay?" This had the expected effect of creating two, deeply disturbed fillies.

"W-wait till I tell my Daddy!" began Diamond! "You'll regret this!"

"Will I?" asked John. "O-o-o-o-r…will YOU?" None of the ponies called his bluff. Instead, Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon just stalked away. Immediately, John was rushed by three excited Crusaders. They surrounded him with various cries of "that was awesome," and "now they know not to mess with us" and "gee, thanks! They're such bullies." Raising both hands, John gestured for them to be quiet.

"Thanks John," said Apple Bloom. Her friends nodded eagerly.

"No problem, ma'am," came his curt reply. "All in a day's work. Besides, I have a feeling I'm going to be staying here for a while. Might as well interact with the locals."

"Uh-huh," came Apple Blooms enthusiastic reply. "Say! Why don' Ah intrerduce y'all to mah frens?" Wary of his former altercation with Cortana, John nodded his acquiescence. "Well, this here is Sweetie Belle! She's Rarity's sister!" The small unicorn waved. "And this here is Scootaloo! She's gonna be a great flyer, like her hero Rainbow Dash!" The orange pegasus nodded and grinned. "And together we're," this last part was said in unison , "The Cutie Mark Crusaders!" [cue stock footage]

"I'm…John."

"Hey!" The sudden outburst came from Scootaloo. "John doesn't have a Cutie Mark! He should join us!" This statement had the immediate effect of creating three excited fillies, one bewildered SPARTAN, and one amused A.I.

"Y'know! A Cutie Mark!" exclaimed Apple Bloom.

"No, I really don't," said John. "Uhhh…" At this point, Cortana jumped in.

"Eh, girls you might want to explain what exactly a Cutie Mark is, hmm? Remember; we're new here, do we don't exactly know everything." Although wary of what he was sure was going to be a very emotional explanation, John had to agree on that last part; they really didn't know much about Equestria or magic, so the more intel they got, the better. Even trivial details like this. This suggestion seemed to acquaint itself quite well with the Crusaders' mindset. Being the de facto leader, it fell to Apple Bloom to explain.

"Well, see a Cutie Mark is a special mark on our flanks, see? And, and the Cutie Mark is special" 'cause it tells us our special talent! 'Cept, not every pony gust gits their Cutie Mark. Ya hafta earn it first."

Hmmm…so it's like a caste system of sorts, John mused to himself. The concept of a predetermined course of life, while somewhat unnerving, didn't completely move John; he had known his fate the first time he had put on his MJOLNIR. His lot was to be a soldier and in a way, the MJOLNIR was a sort of Cutie Mark for him. The ponies weren't so different from him after all. Because their destinies were just that much clearer, because they were able to guess at the murky future ahead, John couldn't help but feel some sort of connection with the ponies. Damn it. Now I must be getting old. Sentimentality? Ha.

"Well, thanks for the explanation. I…have a feeling that I'll be staying here for a while, so I guess it would be best if I learned more about your culture. It would do me well to learn more about your governance and society. The more I learn, the more I can…help."

"Well, if that's the case, all you had to do was ask." John turned to see Twilight Sparkle. The fact that she somehow managed to sneak up on him perturbed him. Damn magic. As if she could hear his thoughts, Twilight smirked. "If you ever need any information, just head on over to my library. I'll be happy to help acquaint you with Equestria."

"Well, we don't have anything to do right now, how about we take her up on her offer," suggested Cortana. John nodded, then turned to Twilight.

"Lead the way."