Every Prince Deserves a Princess

The kiss was broken as quickly as it began, I being both the one to initiate and terminate the display of affection. Well... in truth, it was more an experiment than an intimate moment, but had any outsiders been looking in, the move would have seemed very passionate. I spared no expense in the brief action, wanting to get a taste of him, purely to assist with figuring out just what I was feeling. As I pulled back, and saw the contented muzzle of another stallion before me, my natural reaction was a shiver. It felt wrong, incredibly wrong, to be pressing my lips to another of my own gender. That, I didn't like, I didn't quite understand, and quite honestly... I received no pleasure from such a kiss. That being said, to simply be appreciated... to have someone who felt something close to actual, romantic affection, felt wonderful. For all the pleasure that I could take from various whores, none had filled the void that I had tried so desperately to patch over. Moss didn't quite fill it, either, but damn it, it was a start.

As a bonus- the physical pleasure from intimacy of certain sorts was undeniable, stallion or no. I supposed I could get used to it, so long as he kept his word, and this remained behind closed doors for a time. Upon gazing into his eyes, my own alight with a grateful sort of passion, I found only sincerity and a cool, reassuring calm within his own. It was so unlike him to take this leading role and try to shepherd me along, but on second thought... perhaps it wasn't. His constant jabs, prodding, and insults served much the same purpose- they merely spurred a different feeling within me. Maybe we were finally past the foalish insults, the dick-waving competitions, and the urges to undercut each other. If such a notion was true, though, I did hope that such things weren't over entirely. He did bring a bit of spice, even a bit of fun to my life with his constant, annoying presence.

"Oh, c'mon, put some feeling into it. That was lame as hell. What, two seconds is all I'm worth? If you're gonna lay it on me, Blue, lay it on me." Moss snorted in indignation, clearly unimpressed with the quick kiss I'd offered. My immediate instinct was to lean back in and shut him up again, but... I had my data. My tentative answer. To tangle tongues, bend him over the bed, and dive right in to a complete lifestyle overhaul, while amusing, would have inevitably lead to regret. Moss had said he would be understanding and work with me, in regards to this incredibly odd turn of events. The time had come to either call his bluff, or see just how sincere he was about wanting me for who I was, instead of my body.

"You'll get more when more is due, ruffian." I upturned my nose, and lit my horn to adjust the now incredibly askew bow tie upon my lower neck. Things had indeed gotten a bit heavy and tangled throughout the course of the morning, and I'd need to head outside the room at some point during the day. "I accept your proposal, to become... partners, so long as you keep up your end of the bargain, and keep your trap shut outside this room."

"Yeah, yeah, I ain't retarded. Take your time, as long as I get the goods." The earth pony walked over toward the kitchen, withdrawing a cigarette from his vest, alongside a lighter. Any other day, I would have stopped him. That day, I had much more important things on my mind as I watched him light up. I couldn't imagine the taste of a stallion's essence, lips, and a cigarette would go well together, but I also couldn't have imagined myself in this position before that day. Apparently, I had much to learn about more than just relationships.

I cleared my throat, being as dignified as a stallion in my position could have been at that moment while I made my slow approach to join him within the kitchen. I took the time to walk into his line of sight and capture his eyes to stress the seriousness of what I had to say before speaking. "Moss... now, I know you find this all rather silly, but please, hear me out- I'm not entirely convinced of my bisexuality. It's going to take time for me to warm up to the idea, and your little exercise beneath the sheets may not happen again for quite some time. If we're doing this, we start slow. Understood?"

Moss' ears wilted a bit as he puffed on his cigarette, looking a bit like a child who had just been denied permission to go outside due to the possibility of rain. "Got it. I told ya why I'm in this thing, and I meant it. It ain't just about sex, Blue. That's a big part, since I haven't gotten much in the past two months, but yeah. Whatever ya need." He offered the cigarette, but I promptly waved it away. Crossing one line unexpectedly wasn't quite an excuse for me to begin crossing them all.

"Good." I paused, unsure if I should have said more. "...thank you."

As Moss opened his mouth to reply, a knock came at the door. I looked toward the wooden portal, then back to Moss, and once again at the door. I held up a hoof to my partner, signaling for him to hold but a moment as I moved to answer the summons, my trademark annoyed, condescending glare back in full effect as I swung open the barrier between myself and the ill-timed intruder.

"Yes?"

A white unicorn colt, barely out of his teens, stood wearing day guard armor and panting hard as though he'd just run laps around the castle. The terrified-looking pony rose his head, stammering out news that shocked me to the core.

"P-princess Cadance is giving birth! She requested you be by her side!"

My heart stopped for but a moment at the news, and a swell of joy rose up in my heart. She had requested me? Oh, the sweet irony...

"What of Shining Armor?"

"He's still bedridden, sir! She needs you, immediately!" the colt practically bellowed, drawing looks from others in the hall.

Moss approached the situation from behind me, making a classy interjection as always. "Take it I'm not invited to the twat-ogling ceremony?"

The guard merely stared at Moss, his mouth agape at the sheer disrespect on display. I had half a mind to cuff him upside the head for speaking of Cadenza's marehood in such a way, but then again, it was amusing, and I was about to go and get quite the eyeful of a mare... after entwining myself with a stallion. Part of me hoped that Moss wouldn't mind. The other part simply didn't care.

"N-no, you're... Prince Blueblood, please!"

"Alright, alright, I'm coming!" I quickly turned to Moss, who wore a neutral expression, and didn't seem particularly upset. "Keep the bed warm, you fiend." Both Moss and the guard raised an eyebrow, and it didn't take long for me to deduce just how bad the statement had sounded. "...or you shall be summarily whipped." Clearly, when to shut my mouth was another thing to add to the tally of skills that needed refining.

"...totally." Moss simply snickered and shook his head, before walking back inside as I sprinted out into the hallway, running as quickly as my legs would carry me.

I wasn't quite sure what I expected, as I arrived into the spawning ward, or whatever the damned section of the infirmary for pregnant mares was called, but it certainly wasn't what I found. Auntie Celestia and Auntie Luna both stood near to a rather large hospital bed, surrounded by only a small team of a single doctor and her assistant. Upon the bed lay the princess of love, her legs spread wide and assets on display for all to see as she cringed in quite obvious pain. I'd have been lying had I said I was looking at her face.

"Vladimir! You came!" Cadenza let out a stressed whimper, keeping only one eye open as she arched her back while sweating profusely. She had never looked more beautiful in that moment, though it would have been much improved if the foal had been mine. Regardless of the unfortunate addition to the world that I had arrived to witness, I quickly cantered over to the side of the princess, taking the hoof that she offered me.

"Of course I came. I wouldn't miss this event for the world," I lied. The only reasons, in order, that I had agreed to the summons were to gawk at Cadenza's marehood, have ammunition against Shining once he was out of bed, and to stay on the good side of the three princesses in the room. With Moss so generously offering himself to stand at my side... that last point's importance had somewhat began to wane.

Luna had her constant glare fixed upon me, her piercing eyes almost laying a cloak of ice upon my shoulders as I rubbed at Cadenza's hoof. It was as though she knew of my intentions... and for all I could tell, perhaps she did. After all, the walking freakshow could see into dreams, and my dreams about Cadenza were anything but innocent. I returned her glare with an equal amount of venom, trying to convey the fact that I knew her secret. Of course she was already there- she had been the one to tell me that the birth would take place on that day. It had to be her. There was no other possibility. After I narrowed my eyes, Luna looked away, instead casting her focus to the ground. I had won, and would be confronting her soon enough about her activities.

Auntie Celestia, in contrast, was busy conversing with the doctor, who had taken position at my favorite spot in the room. She was leaned over Cadenza's hindquarters, using light from her horn to assess what was assuredly about to become a messy situation.

"Doctor, how is she? Are there any signs of complications?" Celestia briefly glanced to me and offered a nod, along with a small smile. I returned the gesture while tucking a lock of hair behind my ear, wondering just what was going through her mind at the moment.

"No, none at all. A few more contractions, and this may be a rather smooth delivery. Most pony births are." The professional moved from her position, rubbing lightly at one of Cadenza's hind legs and earning a groan for her efforts. "We are a lucky species indeed."

"Mmm... Vladimir, are you quite alright, being amongst so much estrogen?" Celestia joked. Somehow, I had a feeling that my perverted grin wasn't quite the response she was looking for, but I couldn't fight it down. Today had most certainly been a good day thus far.

"I am well, thank you. Simply here for my closest friend, as any respectable stallion would be."

Celestia nodded. Luna scoffed. Cadenza yelled something involving a racial slur against zebras, decapitation of garden ornaments, a litany of curses, a few of which I didn't know the meaning of, and then, it was done. A small, slimy, pink body slid from her loins, into the doctor's waiting hooves. Cadenza let out another scream of pain, and my stomach turned at the sight of the small creature. It was most definitely a pegasus, soft creme in color, and sporting the beginnings of a light teal mane. The obvious color combination put me off, and so, I looked away and down to the object of my desire as the foal was whisked away to be washed.

"Are you alright, my dear?"

"I... I'll be fine... Shining..."

"He isn't here," I reminded her. "Focus upon yourself, and your lovely new...?"

"It's a filly!" the nurse cooed from the sink, after which a high pitched cry rang through the room. I nodded, and watched as Celestia trotted over to the worker with an overjoyed look upon her face. Luna looked as though her bulbous ass had been nailed to the floor... and, interestingly enough, slightly sick.

"Your new filly. Do you have a name for her?" I asked, squeezing Cadenza's hoof.

"N-no... Shining and I never got to discuss... and then he..."

"Save your breath," I whispered. "Simply name her after me, but feminize it. Vivian, perhaps. It's the only sensible option."

Cadenza smiled weakly. I wasn't joking, and took the response as a bit of an insult. However, her face lit up fully as the small bundle of feathers and fur, swaddled within in a purple blanket, was passed down into her open hooves by the nurse. The alicorn gently rocked her child, and I watched, somewhat humbled. Never before had I seen such a display of pure, unfiltered love.

"She's beautiful. She's everything I ever wanted."

As I noticed that my hoof was then empty, I couldn't help but think the same.