Chapters Please tell me I'm dreaming...
“Excuse me…” I heard a voice call.
“S’cused…” I mumbled half conscious.
“Are you okay?” The same voice asked.
“I’m fine, please leave me alone…” I replied, irritated at the person interrupting my sleep.
“You sure? ‘Cause you’re kinda hanging upside-down in a tree.”
That woke me up. I snapped open my eyes and looked down, or rather, up, at my lower half. For some reason I was covered in blue fur and had… hooves? The shock enough was enough to make me jump, and in doing so, fall from the tree I was indeed hanging from by a hoof.
“Ow.” I said simply. It was only about a three foot fall, so I’d be fine. Aside from the fact I was a blue pony.
“Oh! Are you hurt?” The person asked me.
“No, I’m fine, just unused to waking up in t-t-t…” I looked at the speaker, and it was a mint green unicorn. “Trees…”
“Okay then… what were you doing up there anyway?” She asked.
“I don’t even know what I’m doing HERE. Where are we?”
“The park.”
“I mean town-wise.”
“Ponyville, of course.”
I sighed, and looked down at my red-colored hooves. I noticed I still had on my sweatshirt, but my t-shirt and jeans were gone. I checked the pocket, found twelve weird gold coins, and… My cellphone!
“What’s that?” The mint pony asked me.
“Hopefully my answer to where I am…” I turned it on, and went to the GPS app. No signal.
“Ah, dammit!” I swore softly.
“You’re kinda weird. Where are you trying to go? Are you from out of town or something?” She asked me.
“One, I know I’m weird, but you’re weird to me, unicorn.” I started. “And two, I’m beginning to doubt you know of where I’m from.”
“Okay first of all, you’re a unicorn too, and second, if you didn’t want help, just say so.” She began walking away.
“No, wait! I’m just a little shocked. Not used to my surroundings. I’m sorry if I insulted you, or us, or myself, or whatever.”
She turned back and said “Well, I forgive you. I did call you weird first, anyways. So, where are you from?”
“The United States, Maine.”
“Uhm… I’ve never heard of a United States…” She replied uncertainly.
Right about then I felt like punching something, but I lacked fists. This was getting me nowhere. I had no idea where I was in relation to home, I was a freaking unicorn, and I had no idea whatsoever as to how I got into that tree.
“Hey, maybe Twilight knows about that United States place! She’s one of the smartest people I know.” The unicorn said.
“Well, about anything is better than this useless conversation. Oh, by the way, didn’t catch your name…”
“Really? Oh, sorry. I’m Lyra Heartstrings, Nice to meet you… Name?”
“Right, where are my manners. I’m Ian Camron.”
“That’s… an unusual name. But nice to meet you Ian.” She held out her hoof.
I did some kind of awkward handshake (Hoofshake?) with her, and followed her to a huge tree-house. A literal home inside a carved out tree. It was pretty cool. Lyra knocked at the door, and yet another unicorn came and opened up. This one was purple with different shades of it for her mane.
“Oh, hello Lyra. Nice to see you again. What’s up?” She asked.
“Nice to see you too, Twighlight. My new friend Ian here needs to look up something, he’s kinda lost. Where did you say you’re from, Ian?” Lyra said.
“The United States. Also, nice to meet you, miss.” I said, properly greeting the purple unicorn.
“Hm… I’ve never heard of a United States. Come in, it will be easier if we all check the maps and books.” She walked back inside, Lyra and I following her in.
“Wow… You have quite a few books.” I said, marveling at the numerous shelves.
“Well, this is the library.” She said.
She and lyra both took down books with some kind of glowing-aura-magic power thing. I climbed up a ladder and manually grabbed one. I’d only check the first few pages before realizing that none of them had a North American continent, let alone the U.S.
“Hey, Ian, what were some of the neighboring places? Some other countries?” Twilight asked me.
“… I don’t think we’ll be able to find it in these books.” I said slowly.
“Why not? Is it a really small place or something?” Lyra asked.
“Because I don’t think it’s on your world, that’s why.” I responded, much to their confusion.
“So you’re saying you’re from another world?” Twilight asked, and I confirmed with a nod.
“Have either of you two heard of Humans?” I asked.
“Oh!” Lyra lit up. “I’ve done more than hear about humans! I saw them!”
“In her dreams. They aren’t real.” Twilight said.
I sighed, and said “Well, I think they are, seeing as I was one.”
At this, Lyra nearly exploded.
“Ohmygoshyou’reahuman?What’syou’reworldlike?Doyouallreallyhavehands?Howdoyouhave-“ Twilight cut her off by plugging Lyra’s mouth with her hoof.
“If you’re a human, then why do you look like any other pony I met?” She asked.
“Heck if I know. I don’t even know how I got you your realm, or world, or whatever.” I replied.
“Hm… If you’re a human, say something true about your race. Our only source of human based information is Lyra, so she can confirm or deny it.” Twilight said.
“Alright… It’s true that humans have hands, only have hair on their head for most of their life, are bipeds, are sentient minds-“ I began.
“That’s all stuff I saw!” Lyra shouted excitedly.
I looked at twilight. “Need I say more?”
“Wow, I… Hm… “She puzzled, rubbing her chin with the back of her hoof. “I should contact the Princess, maybe she’ll have some Idea of how you got here. Or if you’re lying. “
“Fine with me, but, how long will that take?”
“Only a couple hours.”
“Hours? It takes that long to get a phone call?”
“Phone call?” Twilight stared at me like I was some kind of alien, which I suppose I am.
“Nevermind.” I sighed.
“In the meantime, maybe you could answer some of my questions?” Lyra asked me.
“Well… I don’t see why not. But I don’t know everything, I’m still only a teenager. Still going to school, y’know.”
“You’re still in school? But school is for fillies, and younger kids… were you held back?”
“No, Humans have tons to learn, so we have to go a longer time.”
About half an hour later someone walked in the door. It was a little purple-and-green lizard boy thing, and I’ll admit, he freaked me out at first. But I kept my cool on the outside.
“Twilight, I got that extra parchment you needed!” He called up the stairs to where she was.
“Aaaaand holy crap.” I interjected in my own sentence as the little dragon walked in.
“Who are you?” He asked me.
“Ian. And uh, who and what are you?”
“I’m a dragon!” He harrumphed. “And my name is Spike.”
“Right, uh, nice to meet you Spike.”
As soon as he went upstairs, I asked Lyra “Why is he working for Twilight?”
“Something like he’s a little brother or something,” She said, adding “Not by blood, of course.” after seeing the look on my face.
“Let’s get back to the questions.”
Twilight came back down not long after that. She was levitating a scroll in front of her, which she… hoofed over to me. She nodded for me to read it, and this is what it said.
Dear Twilight,
I believe I may know how this ‘Ian’ got here. Discord was having one of his more rebellious moments, and decided to open a random gateway over ponyville. Ian likely fell through the portal. As for why he’s a pony now, that could be for a number of reasons. Discord may have unintentionally turned him into one with his chaotic magic. Or perhaps because the universe had no ‘template’ for humans, so he was turned into something it did have one for. Whatever the case, we have no surefire way to send him back, at least, not at the moment. If you can, please bring him up to Canterlot. We’d like to ask him some questions about his realm.
Princess Celestia
“So I’m here by accident because of this Discord guy?” I was really quite mad right then. “That stupid pony or whatever just decided to create some chaos by randomly bringing me in? That son of a-” The vase on a table next to me shattered. I didn’t remember touching it.
“Ian! Calm down!” Lyra said, a hint of fear in her voice.
I did my best to calm down, taking a deep breath and clearing my mind.
“Ian… I think that you have magical potential. I was wondering why you weren’t levitating the book down earlier. You obviously haven’t learned to use your magic.” Twilight elaborated.
“You don’t say? There’s not exactly magic school, or even real magic in my world. Of course I wouldn’t know it.” I replied snappishly.
“I did kinda gather that from how you talked about you’re world. Must be terrible, no magic.” Lyra said.
“We get along without it.” I said, calming down again. I didn’t want to make anything else explode.
“In any case, I’ll have to take you to Canterlot. The last train of the day already left, so I guess we’ll go tomorrow,” Twilight said. “You’ll need a place to sleep for the night…”
“If you have a tent, I can pitch that up somewhere.” I said. I was rather uncomfortable with what I knew they’d both say next.
“Oh no, you can stay here.” Twilight said, at the same time as Lyra saying “You can stay at my home.”
“I really don’t want to impose… doesn’t this place have an Inn or something?”
“Nope.” Lyra said.
“Ah… fine. I’ll stay with one of you.” I resigned.
“Which one?” The inevitable question came up.
I don’t want to choose. I thought. I hate making choices like this.
“Uh… I don’t know.” I replied. Greatest. Answer. Ever.
“Well, I don’t mind if you go with Lyra. I’ll pick you up for the train in the morning though.” Twilight said.
“Then you’re coming with me!” Lyra said excitedly.
“Okay then. I’ll see you around ten tomorrow. Bye now!” Twilight called as Lyra pulled me out the door.
“Lyra, stop pulling! I’m not totally surefooted like thi-” I got a face full of dirt. “Peh! Nasty!”
“Sorry, I just wanted you to see town and I’m so excited and-”
“And tend to use run on sentences when excited. You don’t have to drag me all the way, I’ll just walk.” I said, a little miffed.
“R-right, sorry. Let’s go.”
We walked together through the town, which seemed nice, considering that it was built by hoof. I at first had thought the only population was unicorns, but there are pegasai and normal ponies too. They all seemed friendly enough. I saw a grey Pegasus with a yellow mane flying in a zigzagging non-pattern. She didn’t seem steady, right up to the moment where she hit the wall to our left. I couldn’t help but wince.
“Are you okay? I asked her. “You hit that wall pretty hard.”
“I’m okay.” She said. Her eyes were crossed, but she seemed fine otherwise. “It happens pretty often.” She took off again like nothing had happened.
“Who was that?” I asked Lyra as I rejoined her.
“Derpy. She’s not the best flyer. Lives with Carrot Top. ” She replied.
I decided not to bring up the whole ‘Derp’ meme, as that would lead into a long pointless discussion about the internet.
We continued to a different part of town, and we arrived at Lyra’s home. She pulled a key out of nowhere and opened the door. It was a nice place, hardwood floors and such, with a couch and stairs to the second floor.
“Nice place. You got it all to yourself?” I asked.
“No, Bon-Bon and I share rent.” Lyra said.
“Will she be okay with…?”
“I’m sure she will. She’s nice like that.”
“So I’ll sleep on the couch?” I asked. I didn’t mind, I’d do that when my brother was snoring too loudly at my house. I slept on the couch most nights.
“If you want. I was going to offer my bed, but-”
“That’s fine. I prefer the couch anyway.” The Idea of sleeping in someone else’s bed was weird, even in the best of circumstances.
“Right then. Would you like something to eat?” She went into what I guess was the kitchen.
“No thanks, I’m fi-” My stomach growled. “… Traitor.” I mumbled.
Lyra giggled, and returned with an apple. She handed- I mean, hoofed it to me. (God, that’s annoying.)
“Thanks.” I said, and then took a bite out of the apple. It was… pretty good, though apples were never my favorite fruit.
“Sorry, but we haven’t gone food shopping in a while.” Lyra apologized.
“It’s fine, really. I don’t mind apples.” I assured her.
We made some awkward small talk, the only part worth mentioning was this:
“So, what’s you’re cutie mark?” Lyra asked.
“My… what?”
“Y’know, the mark that signifies your special talent. Like my lyre cutie mark.” She pointed to it with her hoof. I’d thought it was a tattoo. I suppose it ment she was a mucisian, or something like that.
“Uh… I don’t think I have one.” I pulled up my sweatshirt and checked. Nothing there but more dark blue fur.
“So you don’t know your talent?” She asked.
“Not especially, no. Why? Is that weird?”
“Well, most ponies find it when they’re small, so yeah, it’s kinda strange.”
“Hm. Well, It’s hidden by my sweatshirt, so I doubt anyone will notice.” I reasoned.
“I guess so.” She said.
Later, the door opened and Bon-Bon came in. She was a cream colored unicorn mare (Why do I keep meeting unicorns?), with a blue-and-purple mane and tail. Her cutie mark was a piece of candy, so I assumed she made candy and sweets.
“Hi Bon-Bon.” Lyra greeted her.
I gave her an awkward little wave, then introduced myself. “Hello, my name is Ian. Pleasure to meet you.”
“Um, hi there, Ian. I’m Bon-Bon.” She greeted me.
“Bon-Bon, Can he stay here for the night? He doesn’t have anywhere to stay, he’s not from around here.” Lyra pleaded.
Honestly, I really hate when people do things for me. It’s not that I hate them; it’s that I feel I have to pay them back. My pride is my hubris. I can’t help but feel like a… like a wuss whenever things are done for me.
“Sure he can. As long as he’s okay with sleeping on the couch.”
“I’m totally fine with that. Thank you both.”
The night was pretty uneventful from then on. I explained to Bon Bon about the whole ‘I-came-from-another-world-isn’t-that-weird’ thing. Could have sworn I saw her hand Lyra some of those gold coins.
Later in the night we all went to sleep in our respective rooms. That couch was better than the one at my house. I couldn’t help but wonder what that Celestia pony wanted with me. I also wondered if I could tame my magic powers, or at least stop them from blowing up things. Mainly, I thought about how crazy today was, and how crazy tomorrow would likely be. Hopefully I won’t end up strapped to a table, or tossed in the white room in a strait-jacket. Whatever happened, I just hoped I’d get home.
Destruction, Royalty, and the Chaotic God
Destruction, Royalty, and the Chaotic God
Honest to God, I almost thought I’d woken up at home on my own couch. Until I tried to rub the sleep from my eyes, and remembered the hooves. I let out a quiet moan of disappointment, and then fell back onto Lyra’s couch. The sun hadn’t even risen yet. I remembered something about having to be ready for twilight to pick me up at ten, so I figured I had some time. I thought about looking around the house a bit, but the thought was weird. I’m always uncomfortable when I’m in someone else’s home; it’s another one of my ‘pet peeves’. I could go out for a walk, but then Lyra and Bon-bon might wake up and would wonder where I was.
I headed into the bathroom, and for the first time, got a good like at my now equine face. Same blue fur, I had darker colored mane with red tips. My irises were red, which seemed pretty weird. (Compared to what had happened so far, it barely surprised me though.) I looked basically like any of the other ponies I’d seen when going through town yesterday.
I looked outside, the sun was just beginning to rise. I heard someone come down the stairs (It’s really not hard to hear hooves on stairs). Bon-Bon came down, soon followed by Lyra.
“Good morning Ian.” Bon-Bon said, on her way into the kitchen.
“Ian, guess what?” Lyra asked me excitedly.
“Uh… I’m not the only person to fall through to your world?” I responded.
“No, that’s not it. Remember those questions I asked you?”
“Barely any, but I remember you did. Why?”
“I recorded them. And I wrote out the questions and answers last night!” She said, grinning.
“That’s… cool. But why?”
“I didn’t want to forget anything, duh! Besides, maybe the Princess wants to see…” She paused, her eyes widening. “Oh! I just had an idea! What if-”
“Wait- Lemme guess. You think you should come too?” I finished.
“Yeah! Is that okay?” She asked.
She obviously wanted to help. Lyra did actually go to the trouble of taking notes (even if it was slightly creepy), and she had put me up for the night. If she wanted to come, why the heck not?
“Sure. If Twilight will let you.”
I could have sworn she was about to explode with excitement. She probably would’ve if Bon-Bon hadn’t come back in to tell us she’d made some breakfast. Who would’ve known that ponies made cereal?
After breakfast, Lyra proceeded to ask me more questions, writing them down directly instead of recording. I tried getting her to answer some questions I had- Why they’d have a princess and no queen, how they picked things up with hooves, and what her cutie mark thing meant- but she kept the conversation focused on humans and me. Soon enough, Twilight came over.
There was a knock at the door, and I used this opportunity to break away from Lyra’s questions and answer. Bon-Bon got there first.
“Oh, hi Twilight. You’re here for Ian, right?” Bon-Bon let her in.
“Yes. Good morning Lyra, Ian.” She greeted us.
“Oh. Hello Twilight.” Lyra started, rising from the couch. “I wanted to ask you, could I come with you and Ian to see the Princess? I have some notes I took on the answers he gave me. Maybe she wants to see them…?”
“Well… Hm…” Twilight paused and thought for a moment. “I suppose that’s a good idea, though I’m not sure if that’s what she was going to talk to him about.”
Lyra grinned and grabbed her notepad.
“Well… Is there anything else we need to do here, or are we going?” I asked.
“Nope! Bye Bon-Bon, I’ll see you later!” Lyra said to her friend.
I followed the two of them out to the train station. Twilight bought a ticket for herself, Lyra for herself, then I was next. I still didn’t even know what the currency was called, let alone what the value was. The stallion at the ticket counter asked for twelve ‘Bits’, and I had twelve coins. Thankfully it was enough. We got onto the train, which was surprisingly vacant. I sat behind Lyra, and Twilight on the other seat across from mine. It was pretty awkward, no-pony (You gotta admit, some of these terms are just ridiculous.) said anything for half the ride. Twilight asked me what my phone was when I pulled it out. I told her it was a device for talking to people across a distance.
“Can you show me?” She asked. “I’d like to know how it works.”
“It won’t work here, the person I’m contacting needs to have one too. There also needs to be a satellite for the signal to bounce off of. So… no. I can’t show you.”
That probably left her more confused, and with more questions than answers. I let her see my phone (Or, well, let her take it from me.) and mess around with it. I grabbed it back when she started taking it apart.
“Yeah, uh, don’t take it apart. I don’t want to break it.” I told her.
“Oh, okay then. Could I see it later though?” She asked.
“I don’t see why not.” I replied. I wasn’t sure, so I didn’t give a straight answer.
“Oh, can I see it?” Lyra asked. I tossed her my phone, then turned back to Twilight.
“So… what can you tell me about the Princess? Her name was Celestia, right?”
“Yes. Her and Princess Luna rule Equestria, and they raise the Sun and Moon.”
“So she’s a unicorn?”
“No, she’s an Alicorn. They have Pegasus wings, Unicorn magic, and Earth-pony strength.”
Huh, I thought. I wonder why isn’t she Queen?
“Hey, Ian, what’s this place? Lyra interjected, waving my phone at me and interrupting my thoughts.
“Oh… That’s the picture of my house.” I told her, taking my phone back.
“It looks really nice.” Lyra said.
“Yeah, I like it.” A thought occurred to me. What if I never get to go back to it? What if they’re unable to send me back to my world? I might never see my parents again, or my brother. I might- I stopped thinking like that. It wouldn’t help. I went with my normal way of distracting myself from negative thoughts- Ignoring them. I flipped to the next picture in the phone absentmindedly. It was me, the only picture I took of myself (The phone was still pretty new, so I hadn’t taken many pictures.).
Lyra gasped, and asked “Is that you as a human?”
“Yeah. Did you want-” She snatched the phone away and studied the picture. “… to see it?”
Lyra started taking notes again. I turned to Twilight, who shrugged at me. I sat back in my seat. The rest of the ride was void of conversation, other than Lyra asking me how to change pictures. (She was disappointed to find no other pictures of me or my family and friends. I don’t take many pictures.) It seemed like an unbearably long time for the train ride to end.
When we finally did get off, the new town/city impressed me. That Canterlot place was very well built, and the architecture was very nice, in my opinion. It had a certain fantasy element you never really see in my world. I got some distasteful looks from some of the unicorn inhabitants, but I’m used to shrugging off that kind of thing. I’ve dealt with enough snooty people from home to simply not care what they think. We walked right up to the castle, and there was a moment of delay when we had to get past the guards. They wouldn’t let me or Lyra through, until Twilight got them to. The castle was full of mosaics and stained glass windows, depicting what I guessed were either historically significant events, or just beautiful pieces of artwork. Regardless, I was in awe of this beautiful place.
Soon, we approached the throne room. I noticed there was only one princess here, and one throne. The princess herself was noticeably larger than any of the other ponies I’d met, and she had both wings and a horn. Her coat was a brilliant white, and her mane was a myriad of shimmering colors. She definitely had an air of authority about her, and the crown on her head made it blatantly obvious she was royalty.
“Ah, hello there, Twilight. It’s nice to see you again.” The Princess said.
“It’s great to see you again too, Princess.” Twilight said.
“I see you’ve brought you’re friend Lyra with you, as well as… I assume this is Ian?” the Princess questioned.
“Yes, I’m Ian.” I said. “It’s, um, a pleasure to meet you.”
Dammit Ian, I thought. Don’t sound so scared.
Lyra did what I supposed was a curtsy or something, and said “I’m happy to meet you personally, Princess.”
“Yes, quite nice to meet you two. Twilight, Lyra, please excuse me, I’d like to speak with Ian in private.”
The two of them backed out of the room, leaving me with Celestia. I honestly had no Idea what she wanted to talk to me privately about. Hopefully, a way home. Hopefully not some kind of punishment for breaking an obscure inter-dimensional law I knew nothing about.
“Ian, first of all, I’d like to apologize.” She said. “I’d have Discord here to apologize as well, but he’s not around at the moment.”
I was definitely caught off guard by this. I hadn’t expected the princess to apologize on behalf of this Discord person –pony –whatever.
I said something really intelligent, like “Uh, that’s fine.”
“I’m also sorry to say that while he was able to bring you here, we don’t have a way for you to get back.” She continued.
“What? How come?” I asked, interrupting her.
“His magic is based off of chaos, so the portal he opened was random. If we tried to send you back the same way, the portal could open in any other world.” She answered me.
“I see.” I said. “So basically I’m stuck in this world?”
“Yes, I’m afraid you are. Again, I apologize for Discord’s actions.” Celestia said.
I sighed, then asked “I suppose you want to know more about Humans, like Lyra?”
“Only if you’re comfortable with our asking.” Celestia said to me.
“Then you can let Twilight and Lyra in. Twilight would want to know more too, and Lyra went ahead and took notes.”
“Really? Then you can go get them, if you’d like.”
I went out and got the two of them, and the whole audience became a Q and A about humans. It was honestly boring, and there were a few things I didn’t even think about at home that were brought up. Lyra’s notes at least prevented them from asking things more than once. The only high point was when Discord finally showed up.
The guy looked like nature had thrown spare animal parts in a blender and solidified the result. He had body parts from lions, goats, dragons, birds, horses, and I-don’t-even-know-what-that-is. I would recognize him as a chaotic god even if I hadn’t heard about him prior to meeting him. As chaotic as he was, he of course made quite the entrance… By teleporting in on top of me.
“Ow! Get off!” I yelled at him when he warped in.
“Oh?” He levitated off me. “Who’s this?”
“Discord, the stallion you just stood on is Ian, the human you brought here.” Celestia glared at him.
“Oh dear, Sorry. Didn’t mean to. But what do you expect? Teleporting has its chances; it was bound to happen to SOME one.”
I glared at him angrily.
“Oh, right, the whole ‘brought-me-from-another-planet’ thing. Sorry about that too.”
This guy was infuriating. I probably would have ended up exploding something right then if I didn’t remember to keep my cool. I had no idea why they kept him around. I made a mental note to get some revenge at some point.
“Discord, just why were you opening portals?” Twilight questioned, sounding annoyed.
“What? Can’t a Draconequus have a little fun?”
“Your ‘fun’ sucked me into this place,” I reminded him. “Against my will.”
“Well I said I was sorry, didn’t I?”
Deep breaths. Deep breaths. I kept telling myself.
"Calm down Ian." Lyra whispered to me. I was doing a horrible job at hiding my anger, apparently.
"Oh yes, You need to calm down. You're the magical equivalent of a bomb, if I'm not mistaken?" Discord teased.
What the heck did that mean? Was he talking about when I made that vase explode? Somehow, the Princess didn't either notice or acknowledge what he'd said.
“Discord, you will be held responsible for this mishap. You will be punished.” Celestia said.
“Oh, right.” He said nonchalantly. “I’m sure it will be dreadful .”
I couldn’t take it anymore. My anger exploded, as did several of the stained-glass windows. I saw I tackled Discord, and smashed a hoof into his face. He teleported away, and reappeared leaning against one of the marble pillars lining the throne room. He was undamaged, though doubtlessly the pillar wouldn't be at this rate.
“Oh, how wonderfully Chaotic !” He said, delighted.
I charged at him, boiling with anger. The pillar behind him exploded into rubble, and he warped yet again.
“You careless, stupid, demented son of a-!” I yelled, then was cut off. Some kind of light beam struck me in the shoulder. I could no longer move voluntarily, and was loosing consciousness. The floor rose to meet me quickly, but I blacked out just before impact.
I awoke lying face down on the floor. My head was swimming, and my whole body was sore. Silently, I rose to my hooves. The sun was much lower in the sky now. The throne room was in perfect condition, which surprised me. There was no sign of Discord, thankfully. The room was otherwise empty of any of the previous occupants. My sweatshirt was in tatters, and my phone had skittered out of the pocket somewhere, I supposed. I tried the door, which was open, and was... greeted by several guards.
"Freeze!" One said. How cliche.
"Freezing!" I said, holding my hooves in plain sight.
One guard whispered something to another, who ran off down the hall to my left. I heard "Tranquilizer", which was probably not a good sign. The other four guards didn't take their eyes off me for one second, until the fifth came back with Twilight, Lyra, and... the Princess.
I was completely unsure of what to expect. I'd probably scared the hell out of them when I attacked Discord. I'd ruined the throne room in mere seconds. I went completely insane, right in front of them. If they didn't fear me before, they definitely would now.
My fears were interrupted when Lyra ran straight past the guards and gave me a hug. Twilight let out a sigh of relief. Obviously they'd been worried. Lyra whispered something in my ear, "I'm glad you're still okay." She then let go, and stepped back out of the circle of guards.
The Princess, however, did not seem to show much of any emotion. She stared directly into my eyes, and it definitely was not comfortable for me.
"I... Um..." I had no Idea what to say. That display of my lack of self control was not something you could just say 'Sorry' for. I'd just exploded half her throne room and attacked what I assumed was one of her subjects.
"Ian, come with me. We need to talk." She said. Or rather, commanded.
Time to see if I broke any records along with those laws, I thought sullenly. I wonder if they'll use a dungeon.
I followed Celestia down the hall, leaving Lyra, Twilight, and those guards to wonder how severe my punishment would be.
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Conversations with the Sun-Raising Princess and a magic-surpressing 'gift'
Celestia lead me down a hallway with more murals. I had little faith that I wouldn’t be punished for what I’d done. Lifetime dungeon? Hung in the gallows? I had no idea what she had in mind. I just hoped it would be quick and painless. My head hung low as I followed the Princess… Outside? We’d walked out into her gardens, which, though strikingly beautiful and obviously well cared-for, confused me. Wasn’t I being punished?
“Uh… Princess Celestia?” I asked with trepidation. How should I phrase this? “I’d, uh, like to know what my punishment is going to be…”
“There will be no punishment.”
“W-what?”
“Your… Episode was not your fault, mostly. Discord has a knack for angering people, which you’ve just found out. That, combined with your apparent lack of Magic training, would have been more than enough to set you off. I was actually surprised you lasted so long.
I did my best not to take that as an insult.
“During your rage, I noticed the nature of your magic.” Celestia continued. “It seems your magic has a rather heated, energetic manner. Twilight’s magic is more based around changing the nature of things, manipulating things. Yours… It seems to be rather bluntly powerful. It accumulates rapidly, builds up until it bursts. Your anger was a vent for the gathering energy. You were unable to be touched when you were unconscious. The magical energy burned anyone who tried.”
“Wait a second- My anger sparks a magical explosion. So when Discord said I’m like a bomb-”
“He was being quite literal.”
I let this sink in. I was essentially a bomb that could be set off if I was looked at wrong. I could seriously end up hurting someone, somepony, whatever. I could have ended up killing Lyra, or Twilight, maybe even the princess. I put everyone around me in danger.
“Oh God…” I said, feeling queasy. “I think I’m going to be sick…”
I vomited into a nearby bush. Only bile. I must have been out for a while if I’d already digested. I waited for the nausea to pass and wiped off my mouth with my sweatshirt sleeve before looking back up at the Alicorn.
“I can’t be near anyone… I don’t want to end up hurting people… I have to leave everyone.” I said darkly.
“Ian. I know you’re not comfortable with this… magical volcano inside you,” the princess consoled me. “But I may have a solution that doesn’t involve total solitude.”
“What? Suicide?” I asked.
“What’s ‘Suicide’?”
“Never mind… What was your plan?”
“We have many treasures in the castle, magical and rare. One of our treasures draws magical energy and disperses it in a slow, safe way.” The Princess explained.
“A magical disperser…? You mean, it would draw out the excess magic and let it flow out harmlessly?”
“Exactly. Though, it drains all the magical energy while worn, so magic is basically inaccessible to you.”
“Not a problem. It’s been nothing but a burden so far.”
“There is one more thing…”
“What? I don’t have any bits or anything, so I don’t know exactly how to pay for it.” I said, remembering my lack of wealth.
“No, not money. I will have to take it back at some point. It would be wise for you to learn magic so that by then, you can control it.” Celestia said.
“Is that all? Fine then. I’ll learn magic, but who’d teaching me? You? Am I going to study it on my own?” I asked.
“No, I won’t be teaching you, and no, learning on your own is never a good idea,” Celestia said. “You know that Twilight Sparkle is one of my students, right?”
“I do now. Why?”
“I’m going to have her tutor you.”
That was… unexpected. I didn’t know how to react at first. I knew so little about her that I could have come off as rude, or overly excited.
“Uh… Okay then? Why her though?
“She lives in Ponyville, so she’s nearby. She has a rather large amount of books on magic because she works at the library. She herself is very adept at using magic. It seems like a natural choice.” The princess elaborated.
After hearing why, it did seem to make sense. There was little reason not to have her as teacher.
“That… does make a lot of sense.” I said slowly. “Does she already know?”
“Yes, I talked it over with her while you were unconscious.”
“Hey… that’s right. Which one of you guys did that?” I asked, groundlessly miffed at the tranquilizer spell being used on me. (I also wanted to know who to ask about learning it.)
“That would be I. If I hadn’t, your little rampage could have torn the castle down.”
“Right… I’m, uh, really sorry about all that… I’ve always had a habit of letting my anger get the best of me, even back home.” I apologized sheepishly.
“Its fine, the damage was minor and easily mended.”
I took one last look at the garden before turning back to Celestia, asking “When do we get the dispersing thing?”
“We should go get it right now, in case Discord comes back soon. I sent him off to keep him from further antagonizing you when you awoke.”
I followed next to the Princess back down the castle’s hallways. We came across the group of guards and my friends, who’d been worried about the Princess and I respectively. One aimed a pike at me, but the princess told them I was no danger at the moment. He backed off, but they still stood close by us.
Twilight and Lyra had a million questions (I am getting SO tired of answering these ponies.), which I did my best to answer.
Lyra walked uncomfortably close to me, so I’d step to the side. She’d follow. I fell back. She fell back too. She was being unusually clingy and close. Maybe this was normal for her? I didn’t know.
Whatever the case, we arrived at a guarded door, which the Princess and Twilight were allowed through, but we were not. Apparently they still didn’t trust me, which I suppose I understood. Lyra didn’t want to leave me behind. We waited for about three minutes, and they returned. Twilight was holding a Silver bracelet in her mouth. It was entirely plain, other than a Small diamond inlaid into it.
“This is the disperser, Ian. It’s going to drain and disperse your magical energy. It can only be taken off by the one who puts it on. Ian, if you’d allow Twilight to put it on?” Celestia said. “I’d prefer if she were the one who’d take it on and off, because-”
“I get it, you don’t trust me. I wouldn’t either. Go ahead.” I said shortly.
I tried not to imagine it as anything weird, like an engagement ring or anything. It technically wasn’t even a gift. It was awkward enough as it is.
When it was on, it clamped down and seemed to shrink until there was no way I could get it off even if I wanted to. The Diamond turned a deep shade of Blue, similar to my fur. Everything seemed less vivid, as if the magical withdrawal was affecting my physical abilities.
“Right, so now no more explosions?”
“No more, unless one happens when I take it off.” Twilight said.
“It looks nice.” Lyra commented. “So no magic then? Kinda like your world?”
“I guess so.” I said. “I’m glad I can’t, it’s been nothing but trouble so far for me.”
“Well, now that that’s settled, we should get going.” Twilight said. “The train leaves soon. Goodbye Celestia, I’ll write to you soon!”
Twilight and Lyra walked off, but Celestia held me back for a moment.
“Ian. I may have forgotten to mention this earlier, but the magic that Twilight teaches you is the ONLY magic you’re supposed to learn. You’re not to do any independent study, is that clear?” Her tone made it clear that she was absolutely serious.
“Uh, Yes Mam… Princess… Your highness…” This was the first time I was scared of her.
“Okay then. You can go now.”
I did my closest approximation of a bow, then ran to catch up to my friends. They’d waited for me at the entrance.
“What did Celestia want?” Lyra asked.
“Uh… Nothing. She just wanted to say good luck, and, uh, stuff.” I am a terrible liar after being scared.
Thankfully, neither of them seemed to notice. We headed back to the train, and soon after departure, I remembered something- I’d still lost my phone.
“Oh, dammit!” I exclaimed softly as I checked my pockets.
“What?” Lyra asked.
“I forgot my phone…”
“This thing?” She held it up to me. Where she pulled it from, I’ll never know.
“Yes, thank y-” She pulled it back. “… Can I have it back?”
“Maybe.” She swung her legs from the seat. She was flipping through my files. How did she guess my genius password? (Then again, I suppose 'PasswordIan' isn't very difficult.)
“Hey, come on, give it back Lyra.”
“In a minute, I’m looking at stuff.”
Then she came up on the file. It was clearly labeled “DO NOT UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES OPEN”, but she did it anyway.
“Give it back!” I snatched it out of her hooves.
“Who was that person?” Lyra Inquired. It was too late. She saw her.
“I don’t want to talk about it.”
“About what?” Twilight walked back into the car we were on. She’d gone to talk to the ticket checker pony.
“About the person on his Phone.”
“Oh? Can I see?”
“No.”
“Why not?” Twilight asked.
“Because.”
“Because what?” Lyra asked.
“Because she’s dead.”
Lyra and Twilight shut up. Twilight levitated it from my grip and looked. (Damn magic, letting people- Ponies do whatever they want.)
It was my girlfriend, Sarah. It was the last time I’d seen her. We’d headed down to the docks and gone for a ride with some friends on a boat with their dad. A storm blew in out of no-where, and… Bye bye Sarah. There were search parties for days. She was never found. It was over a month ago. I still was getting over it.
“Who…?” Lyra began.
“My Girlfriend. She fell off a boat. Never found her.” I said sullenly.
There was silence accept for the sounds of the train. I got up, snatched my phone from Twilight, and headed back a couple cars to an empty one. I wanted to be alone. It was late by now, the moon had risen. I shoved my phone in my pocket. I didn’t want to think about her. Not now, not ever. It never ended well. Sarah was gone, no changing it. I lay down on one of the benches and fell asleep.
Waking up on a train because it stops. Not recommended. I slammed into the seat in front of me. It was still late, or possibly early morning. I stood up, stretched out a bit, and moved up the train to where the Girls were. Both were already awake, or still awake. I didn’t know.
“Good morning…” I stifled a yawn.
“Oh… Hi Ian. About last night-” Lyra started.
“Forget about it, okay?”
“Right. Well, we’d better get off before the train starts moving again.” Twilight said, walking out the door.
Lyra and I followed onto the platform. We walked back into town, and then I realized: I still hadn’t asked Twilight about when the first lesson would be.
“Hey, Twilight,” I said. “The Princess said you’d teach me magic, so when this gets taken off for good, I can control it… When is the first lesson?”
“Oh, right. I have some time in the afternoon, around three. Okay?” She replied.
“I’ve got no plans.” I said.
“Alright, I’ll see you then.”
Twilight departed for her home, and I went with Lyra back to her house.
“So, tomorrow, you might want to look for work somewhere.” Lyra said suddenly.
“Yeah, I’d been thinking the same thing,” I said. “But I don’t know where to start. Know anyone who could be hiring?”
“AppleJack is looking to hire somepony to help on her farm.” Lyra said.
“Where does she live?”
“Southwest of here. It’s not hard to find.”
I remembered something about farmers waking up early. I thought about heading there now, but that would just end up very, very awkward. I haven’t even met her, and I’m not great at first meetings with ponies, if my past few are anything to go by. I also know that knocking on someone’s door at night often ends up with the person being chased off with a bat, my brother has tried it. I’d be better off meeting with her later in the day than at this hour.
We arrived at Lyra’s house, and went inside. Bon-Bon was still probably asleep, so we were quiet. Lyra went up to her room with a quiet ‘Goodnight’ and I was downstairs. I was reminded greatly of the morning before. Hard to believe so much could happen in twenty-four hours.
I was still tired, despite my rest on the train. I lay down on the couch and fell asleep, hoping I wouldn’t be awoken in the same manner as the last time.
Adjusting to a new lifestyle
I was in a pitch black place. No light. I couldn’t see anything. It was horribly cold, and a malevolent presence pervaded the area.
“So you’re the one who came here from another world…” A dark voice echoed in my mind.
“Who’s there?” I asked to the open air, vapor forming in front of my mouth.
“Not of your concern, human.” The voice said, it's tone hinting at it's annoyance.
“How do you-”
“SILENCE!” The voice roared. “I come to show you the future you cause.”
“The future? What about it?”
“You will see all you know, all the so-called friends you’ve made burn, freeze, and die. It will all be because of you.”
An image appeared before me, of Ponyville… Everything burned with black fire. Smoke clogged the air, buildings were half frozen in shadowy, crystalline ice. Nobody was around.
“Yes, it will all happen unless you leave.” The dark voice said. “Come to me, Ian. Many more lives will continue on.”
“Y-you’re lying! There’s no way I’d-”
“They will all die, and it will all be your fault, Ian. Just like Sarah.”
“That..! That was not my fault… I couldn’t do any-”
“We both know what you did. If you don’t leave and come to me, it will all happen as I’ve shown you.”
“N-no! Shut up!”
“You will come, Ian. Whether you like it or not, you will.”
I hit the floor.
“Ow.” I said instinctually.
I’d fallen off the couch, and hit my head on the floor. No real damage, it was more of just a reaction than anything.
A nightmare… That was strange. I haven’t had a nightmare since I was really little. And this felt different. Erie, almost. I shook off the creepy feeling it gave me.
Forget it, dreams are nothing but figments of my imagination. I thought. They never really happen.
I pushed myself back up on all four hooves, and I looked over to the window. The sun had just begun to peek over the horizon. The light of dawn spilled in.
At least if AppleJack gives me the job, I won’t have trouble waking for it. I thought.
I was unsure whether to go ask now, or later. After a moment’s consideration, I decided the sooner the better. Didn’t farmers wake up early anyway? I went to leave a note for Lyra so she wouldn’t wonder where I am. I found a quill and parchment, and some ink. I still have no idea how I’m able to write with a hoof, or even pick things up, now that I think about it. Best not question it.
So I left the note on the couch and headed out. Didn’t Lyra say she lived southwest of here?
I arrived at the Apple family farm. Surprisingly, it looked a lot like other farms I’ve seen (Not that I’ve seen very many.), red barn, fenced in fields, and so on. A huge area was covered in apple trees, predictably.
I didn’t see anyone- I mean, anypony around. Perhaps they were on the fields. I looked around a bit more, decided I should check the orchard first.
“Um, Hello?” I called out. “Is there a Pony named AppleJack here?”
“Nope.” A deep male voice replied.
I turned around to see a red stallion with some kind of yolk around his neck. He had one of those mark things- a cutie mark?- with a half of a green apple.
“Who are you?” I asked him.
“Name’s Big Mac. You?”
“I’m Ian, Ian Camron. Nice to meet you.” I told him.
When I thought for a moment, I was surprised that he hadn't found my name weird. Its not exactly in line with whatever trend that's going on around here. But then again, maybe they were just being kind.
“So what’re you looking for ma’ sister for?” he asked.
“I was, uh, looking for a job. I heard there was an opening here…?”
“There sure is. Can ya’ buck an apple tree?” He asked.
“Excuse me?” I asked, confused.
“Like this.” He kicked one of the nearby trees with his back leg, knocking all the apples into the baskets set below it.
“Oh. I’ll give it a shot.”
First, I kicked the tree with one leg, like him. It shook, but nothing happened. Slighly annoyed, I tried again, harder. One, single apple fell. Embarrassment welling up within, I bucked the tree with both hind legs, then fell flat on my stomach. No balance. About a third of the apples fell, several missed the baskets. One impaled itself on my horn, embarrassingly enough.
Big Mac held a hoof over his mouth in attempt to hide his laughter. I heard another per- another pony’s laughter too, a girl. I turned to see an orange mare with a straw colored mane. She had on a stereotypical cowboy/cowgirl/I-don’t-even-know-what-they-call-it-here hat. The cutie mark thing on her was three apples.
“Does that count?” I asked halfheartedly, getting back to my hooves. I probably didn’t get a job.
“Boy, that there was one of the funniest things I’ve seen in a while.” The mare said, her laughter subsiding.
“Eeyup.” Big Mac agreed.
I pulled the apple off my horn, tossing it aside into one of the baskets. “So I take it that I didn’t get the job?”
“Why don’t ya’ try again? Ya’ need to brace yer front legs, so ya won’t fall. It’ll give more power too.” The mare advised.
I tried again, doing what she said. Almost all the remaining apples fell from the tree, and I didn’t fall. Not all made it into the buckets, but still, it was an improvement for sure.
“Thanks. I’m Ian. What’s your name?” I asked the mare.
“Ma’ name’s AppleJack. Pleasure t’ meet ya’.” She replied. "Ian, eh? That's not a usual name."
"Uh, I guess not. I'm not from around here, though."
"Where ya' from then?"
The question wasn't where, it was whether I should tell her. If I did, I might be considered crazy. If I didn't, if she found out, I'd be marked a liar. God, I hate this kind of situation.
"Far away, you probably haven't heard of it." I told her.
"Oh? What's it called?"
Damn.
"Uh..." I started. "Maine."
"Mane?" She asked, confused.
"Uh, no. M-a-I-n-e. It's not very close to here, really."
"Hm..." She rubbed her hoof over her chin, as if trying to tell whether I was lying or not. Technically I'm not, but I'm not telling the whole truth either.
"Well, I ain' heard of it. But welcome anyways, Ian." She said, grinning, then giving me a hoofshake, followed her bother.
“So do you think I could get a job here?” I asked her.
“Ah don’t see why not.” She said cheerfully. “That a good idea Big Mac?”
“Eeyup.” He agreed.
“Thank you both.” I was almost sure I wouldn’t get the job. Guess I made a pretty good impression on the two of them. Or they wanted me around for comic relief.
“So that’s dawn, right?” I confirmed.
AppleJack nodded. “That too early for ya’?”
“Nope. I woke up earlier than that back home.” I boasted.
“Oh? Okay then. See ya’ in the mornin’!” She said as she headed back into the orchard with her brother.
That went better than I expected. I thought as I walked back into town. They even let me keep the apple I speared.
It was still early in the day, or at least, it was before noon. Twilight didn’t need to see me until three, and I didn’t have any other plans. My note to Lyra only said I was heading out to find AppleJack and ask for a job, so wandering around all day would make that a lie.
I headed back to Lyra’s house, but no one was home. (I took a moment to question why they'd left the door unlocked.) I looked around for a moment, then remembered- of course Lyra or Bon Bon wouldn’t be home. They had jobs, whatever they may be.
What should I do? I wondered. I could explore around, check out town, maybe. It’d be more productive than waiting around here.
I walked into town, passing by many other ponies. I still think it’s a nice place, kinda quiet and simple. I went mainly unnoticed by ponies, unsurprisingly. I suppose being a pony in a place full of them is a good way to blend in. I had a brief encounter with one, eye-burningly pink earth-pony (I don't get it. Why are they called earth ponies if they're not from earth?) who saw me, gasped, and ran off. I'm not exactly sure if this was normal, but who am I to judge?
I stepped into a familiar area. I realized this was the park where I woke up. The tree behind me was where I fell from and met Lyra. My first moments here were my first conscious ones in the whole world.
“Watch oooout!” I heard someone shout.
I dropped to the ground as a familiar grey pegasus flew in right over me and into the nearby tree. I heard something crack, not like any branch I've heard. Rising from the dirt path, I rushed over to see Derpy on the ground, her wing bent at an unnatural angle. Apparently she’d skidded quite a bit, as the tree was far behind, and a small rut had been carved into the dirt.
“Oh god, are you alright?” I asked, the answer already known to me.
“N-no…” She said between sobs. “I hurt my w-wing…”
“We gotta get you to a hospital, that thing looks seriously broken.” I said.
She hobbled up onto her hooves, then collapsed to the ground, head first. Her front left hoof wouldn’t support her.
“Ow!” She yelped. “Owowow!”
“It’s okay, you’re going to be okay…” I said slowly and calmly. “Here… I’ll carry you to the hospital if you know which way.”
I helped guide her on top of my back. She wasn’t too heavy, but an awkward burden. She directed me (and misdirected me) to the hospital, where I helped check her in. I was reminded of the time my parents had taken me to the hospital when I broke my wrist when I fell from a tree. The doctors said she’d be fine, but have to stay off that leg and wing. She’d be in there for a few days, at least.
I also learned the ponies heal ludicrously fast. There was one mare who healed a wing in less than three days, I’d heard. I didn't exactly comprehend how, but I wasn't going to ask for an explanation I wouldn't understand. I'm no medical student, of human anatomy or pony anatomy.
“Thanks a lot, mister.” Derpy said to me, in the hospital bed. They'd bandaged up her wing, and set her front leg in a splint.
It occurred to me that she was could be as old, if not older than I, so the whole ‘Mister’ thing was a bit weird. Then again, she could be ten years old for all I know. These ponies have hard to judge age.
“It’s no problem, really.” I told her. “I was just in the right place at the right time. I’m sure anyone else would’ve done the same.”
“Anypony.” She corrected.
“Oh, uh, right.”
“Hey… I just thought of something.” She said. “I don’t even know your name!”
“I’m Ian, Ian Camron.” I introduced.
“I’m Ditzy Doo.”
“I thought your name was Der-” I stopped myself. Was that an insult here? For all I knew, it could be a bully’s nickname for the cross-eyed mare.
“Some people call me Derpy, I don’t really mind.” She said.
“Okay then. Nice to meet you, Ditzy.” We did what I guess was the equivalent of a handshake (a hoof-shake, I think?).
We made some conversation, for a seemingly short time. I’m not really sure why I stuck around, but it was nice to have someone I could just talk to. When it was Lyra, or Twilight, or that Princess, it was tense. They knew more about what happened to me than I did. It’s all so awkward. Derpy, or Ditzy, knew nothing about that weird stuff. There wasn’t any tension. I could speak with her more easily, I guess. She had a silly sense of humor, and was kinda cute, in a naïve, innocent kind of way. I had fun talking with her. She almost reminded me of… no. What the hell am I thinking? She’s just a friend. An acquaintance. I know and knew nothing of her. She’s technically not even my species, I think. I'd promised never to even think of 'her' again, or anyone like her, not after the boat. Besides, I don't... shut up, me.
I glanced outside at the sun. It was well past two now.
“Oh, shoot.” I exclaimed, mortified. Twilight expected me at three. “I’m gonna be late! I’ll see you later Ditzy!”
“Bye Ian!” She called as I ran out of the hospital toward Twilight’s Library.
I arrived around half past three, so I was late for sure.
That's never a good way to have class start, I thought.
“I’m here,” I said panting. “Sorry I’m late, I had to help Ditzy at-” I stopped.
Twilight was busy at a worktable mixing various chemicals and potions. Was she doing alchemy?
“Uh… What are you doing?” I asked.
“Huh? Ian?” She turned to me. “Oh gosh, is it really that late? I’m sorry I was working on an assignment for Princess Celestia.” She apologized.
“No, It’s fine, I was late too. Just… what are you making?”
“Just doing some chemistry, is all. Don’t worry, I can continue this later. The potion needs to simmer over a low flame anyway.” She set up her Bunsen burner and a vial of a coppery colored liquid using her magic.
“Alright, well, I’ve got a beginner’s lesson planned out for us. Simple levitation. It shouldn’t be too hard.”
Okay then, I thought. That could be helpful. And hopefully easy.
“First, we need to take off this,” She said, gesturing to the disperser. “Then we can begin.”
I held out my foreleg so she could remove it. At her touch, the metal band expanded to the point where it could easily slide off. The diamond turned back to its clear color. I felt the rush of energies that I recognized as magic refill my body. Everything became sharper, clearer. It was slightly overwhelming. A sensory overload, I guess.
“Woah, magic rush.” I said, stepping back slightly, and blinking slowly.
Twilight giggled softly, then said “Now, we can begin the lesson.”
An hour later, I set down the numerous rubber balls that I’d been practicing on. I’d been very adept at controlling this basic magic, now that I at least knew how. The lesson had been easy enough, and now I could levitate objects. It was like playing a game with the controls inverted- Attempting left moved it right, and vice versa. Difficult at first, but it was easily adjusted to.
Twilight took a moment to continue some of her chemistry work, though I paid little attention. I was slightly concerned when a puff of black smoke blew out in my direction.
“You’re pretty good at this kind of magic.” Twilight turned me. “Then again, it is pretty basic, and you have quite the surplus.”
“Yeah, I’ve never heard that before.” I rolled my eyes.
“Really? Didn’t Princess Celestia-” Twilight started, confused.
“I was being sarcastic, Twilight.” I said.
“Oh. Don’t do that, I’m not good at noticing it.” She scolded.
Another puff of smoke, white this time, blew out behind her. She turned to tend to it again.
“As if you had to point that out." I muttered. “Sorry. Can we move on?”
Twilight walked me through an exercise of manipulating the stuff I was levitating, which I was considerably less good at. It was stuff like turning book pages (I ended up tearing them out by accident), spinning a wheel (I broke it in half), writing with a quill (Ink splattered everywhere. I think I’ll stick to writing by hoof.), and using scissors (I’m still apologizing to Spike about that. In my defense, he shouldn’t have been standing there. It least the little clipped bit missing from the spine on his head isn’t that noticeable.)
“Celestia was right. I’m better at general force, not detailed stuff like this.” I told Twilight while scrubbing the ink I’d spilled off the wall.
“I don’t think so,” She said, cleansing a book of the splatted ink with her magic. “I bet you’re just inexperienced.”
“Maybe he shouldn’t use it.” I heard Spike mutter, feeling the now flat-cut top spine on his head.
During the levitation part, the inverted movement part was adjustable, but this part was overly complicated. Frustratingly complicated.
I finished scrubbing the ink off the wall, and we returned to the lesson.
It was another three and a half hours later, and I was done. I’d gotten better at the manipulation part (Though pages will occasionally tear), so that was good. A thought occurred to me when from my conversation earlier, with Ditzy.
“Hey, Twilight,” I asked the mare. “Do you think it would be a good idea for me to learn about some of the terms you ponies use? I’ve gotten the feeling that there are a few things I say that wouldn’t exactly fit in here, as you may have noticed...”
“Actually, I’m surprised I hadn’t thought of that. I noted it earlier, but never really gave it a second thought.” She said. Twilight was silent for a moment, likely considering it, then she said “Yes, That’s probably a good idea to incorporate that into the lesson plan.”
We had almost an hour used only for me to learn pony grammar, which, I found, was increasingly silly and annoying to remember. Anypony, Hoofshake, all that stuff. It was almost torturous, and I regretted bringing up the subject. I sincerely doubted I would remember to use it, but would try to, at least. (I'd never liked English in school, it was my least favorite subject. This was almost twice as bad.)
When the lesson finally ended, Twilight gave me an assignment to read a book on basic levitation. I had to carry it in my mouth, because she’d put the disperser back on, once again blocking my magic. I waved her and Spike (who was mildly upset and wouldn't wave back) goodbye as I returned to Lyra’s house.
Lyra was waiting for me on the couch when I came back. I noted a bottle on the side table, empty.
“Where were you?” She said.
I took the book out of my mouth. “My lesson. You know that.”
“I meant earlier. I know you were gonna go to ask AppleJack for a job but that took-” She rushed, a worried tone in her voice.
“Lyra, I ran into Ditzy. She got hurt, so I took her to the hospital.” I explained.
“Who?”
I rolled my eyes. “Derpy.”
“Ooh…” She said quietly, realizing who I meant. “But still, you were gone way too long to just’ve dropped Derpy off at the hospital.”
“I stuck around and talked with her. Is that so wrong?” I protested, failing not to let my cheeks flush.
“Well, no, but-”
My stomach growled. I only just realized I hadn’t eaten since this morning, when I got the impaled apple for the farm.
Lyra giggled, then said “Hungry?” She seemed to let the other subject drop.
“I guess so.” I consented. “Anything I can get to eat?”
“We went food shopping, and Bon-Bon and I made salad for dinner earlier. There’s still some left, I think.” She rose from the couch. “I’ll go get it.”
“Nah, that’s fine, I can go get it. Thanks though.” I told her.
It occurred to me that she and Bon-Bon were essentially letting me live and eat here for free. Considering they had no obligation to do so, that was incredibly kind of them. Nobody on Earth did that, as far as I'd met.
I really owe her, I thought. I need to pay her back somehow. Maybe now that I have a job I can pay rent or something.
I scrounged around a moment for the remaining salad, found it, and joined Lyra back on the couch. We made some conversation about how our days went, she was glad to know I got the job at Sweet Apple Acres. I figured now would be the best thing to talk about the whole rent thing. (I still couldn't get her to tell me where she worked, she danced around the subject with ease. Her talent should have been 'avoiding the question'.)
“So, now that I have a job,” I said. “I can finally start to pay you back for your hospitality. Really, I owe you a lot for taking me in like you have.”
“Oh,” She said, seemingly surprised. “I haven’t even thought about rent. You don’t-”
“Yes, I do.” I insisted. “You can’t just put me up without compensation. It’s… Weird.”
Looking back on the conversation, I realized I was doing it more for selfish reasons than for her wellbeing. I don’t like owing people, or in this case, ponies, favors or anything. It bugs me. They’re loose ends, which are inconveniencing at best.
“Well… Okay then.” She consented.
“Good. Hopefully I can pay weekly, if not, every month, depending on AppleJack’s payment schedule.”
“I won’t make you pay if you can’t though.” She added as an afterthought.
I noticed Lyra's eyes were... foggy looking. Weird. Was she that tired?
“Really, you’re too kind.” I told her. “Besides, that wouldn’t work out well, would it?”
“I guess not.” She giggled. Something seemed off about her.
“Lyra…” I asked. “What’s up? You seem… weird.”
“Nothin’, my friend Berry Punch came over, we had a drink or two.” She admitted, swinging her legs over the floor, her hooves bumping the side of the couch clumsily.
Well that’s just great. I’m talking to a drunken unicorn. I didn’t even know they had alcohol on this planet… universe… dimension… whatever, I thought.
I knew things could never go well when you were in a room with a drunk per- pony, unless you were drunk too (Not from experience, thankfully.).
“Oh…” I said. “Maybe you should go to bed, Lyra. It’s getting late.”
“It’s not that late.” She said.
"Well, aren't you tired from... whatever it is you do?" I said, realizing that was poor argument.
"Nope." She said.
“I got some reading to do. It would help me concentrate. Y'know, homework.” I was making excuses now.
“Oh, ‘kay then. I’ll see you tomorrow, Ian.” She said. She headed up the stairs, swaying slightly.
Strange, I thought. I never took her for a drinker. Then again, did I...? Nah… It’s probably nothing. I’m overthinking things. Just one glass too many when talking with a friend. (At least I had a hint at someone's age, assuming they didn't let children drink. And that their legal drinking age is the same, and- ah, forget it.)
I lay back on the arm of the couch and began reading. The book was written in English, which was a general surprise. But all the strange things that I’d met, experienced, and learned about considered, this barely qualified as weird.
The book went over some methods for the manipulation of levitating objects, but nothing mentioning the inverted-controls type of thing I experienced.
It was obviously directed at a much lower reading level, so I finished quickly. I’d have to ask Twilight if she did that intentionally, or if it was the only book she had on such a basic subject. Either way, I would ask for more advanced material.
I set the book aside and turned out the light. Hopefully I’d get a decent night’s rest so I’d be ready to kick the apples from the trees. Thoughts of the previous night's dream came back to me. That was off-the-scale creepy at a minimum. But just that: a dream. Nothing to worry about...
My alarm blared in my ears, and I quickly shut off my phone.
I’d set it the night before so I’d wake up on time. I didn’t remember that is was loud as a passing fire truck, though. I hoped I hadn’t woken up Lyra or Bon-Bon.
Sunlight poured through the window, creating a small rectangle of light on the wall opposite. It was on time, at least.
Seeing no need to leave a note this time, I headed directly to the farm.
“Hello?” I called out as I entered the gates.
“Huh? Ah, Ian! Over here!” AppleJack peered out through the Barn’s door.
I headed over to see what she was doing. It looked like she was piling barrels up against the wall.
“What’s in those?”
“Cider.” She said, then she… panicked, I think? “Uh, the uh, season’s comin’ up soon, we’re preparing earlier this year.” She explained. “Usually we’d, uh, run out before everypony got some, so this year, we’re getting ready early so they can.”
She stood in the door, grinning nervously.
Or you could just set a limit on how much a pony could buy, I thought.
“Uh-huh…” I said, nodding.
“Now, I need you to get buckin’ the apples from the trees. Don’t worry ‘bout bringin’ the apples here, Big Mac’s job it to haul ‘em over.” AppleJack explained, her normal demeanor returning. “Oh, and if ya’ get hungry, feel free to take an apple or two.”
“Where do I start?”
“Anywhere there’s apples in the trees.”
“Oh. Right.”
I started walking away, before I remembered something. I didn’t know how late I was working. I might be late for or miss my lessons.
“Uh, Applejack?” I started, turning back around to face her. “I thought I might need to tell you, I have lessons in the afternoon, around three…”
“What for?” She asked, poking her head around the door.
“Well, I never learned magic, so Twilight is teaching me. Do you know-”
“Twilight? Course I do. Is that the lessons she was talking about? If ya really do need ‘em, I’m not gonna stop ya.”
Weird how things like that work out.
“Well, that’s… great! Thanks, Applejack.”
“No problem.” She said, then returned to stacking the barrels.
I headed off to start kicking the apples down, which was not very easy. It took a few kicks on most of the trees, and they often missed the buckets. It was slow work, to say the least. I made a small amount of progress, which was better than nothing. I did take AppleJack’s offer and ate a couple, because I hadn’t eaten breakfast, and lunch passed by.
Time passed, and it was nearing three, according to my phone, so I headed back to the barn, and found AppleJack talking with… Twilight?
Huh, I thought. I wonder what Twilight’s doing up here?
“... So that’s why I’m teaching him.” I heard Twilight finish, as I neared the two mares.
“Twilight?” I asked. “Not that I’m unhappy, but why are you here?”
“Oh, Applejack told me yesterday that she hired you. I thought that I could come over to pick you up, so you could get to your lesson on time.” She explained.
“Oh. Cool. But, uh, I think I can find my way from one place to another at this point. It’s not like the buildings move around here.” I joked. “Eh… Right?”
“Now where’d ya get an idea like that?” AppleJack asked me.
“Heh. Just being silly.” I said, then turning to Twilight. “I guess now I have to go for the lesson…?”
“ Yes, is that okay AppleJack?”
“Sure. Oh, an’ before ya’ go, lemme get yer pay. Wait here.” Applejack headed into the Barn house, and returned with some bits to pay me.
“Here ya’ go, twen’y bits.” She said, hoofing me a small brown pouch with the bits inside.
“Thanks AppleJack. I’ll see you tomorrow?” I asked.
“If yer on time ya will.” She replied, then heading back into the barn.
Twilight and I headed back to her library home.
“So, you and AppleJack are friends?” I asked as we walked.
“Yes. We’ve known each other for a long time now.”
Briefly a stupid question passed through my mind, but I dismissed it.
“So, anyone else I should be warned that your friends with?”
“Oh, yes. There’s Rainbow Dash, FlutterShy, Rarity, Pinkie Pie, and, well, you’ve met Applejack.” Twilight listed.
“Is Pinkie Pie bright pink all over?” I asked. Twilight nodded. “Might’ve seen her around. So they all know each other too?”
“Yes, why?”
“Well, back home, I had these two, really different groups of friends, and neither of them wanted anything to do with the other. It’s weird, like I’m a bridge between… I was.” I corrected. “Was a bridge.”
“Oh. What were your friends like?”
“Very different, it’s like the difference between… uh… well... It’s difficult to explain… One of them was a group I’d hang out with during and after school. The other was the group I’d go out with to have fun. Neither really liked the other, and it was hard to get them together at all. I’d always have to choose between them, which I always hated.” I explained.
“So they couldn’t get along, and you had to pick between them?”
“Yeah. Not the best arrangement, but it worked out.” I replied.
“So… where did that girl fit in?”
I was silent for a moment.
“Oh, hey, we’re here.” I said, as we arrived at the tree. I was glad for such a distraction.
We’d finally arrived at the library. Twilight took off the disperser, set it in an empty alcove between some books, and we got to work. We finished up my learning of levitation magic rather quickly. (I’d finally stopped breaking things when I tried to manipulate them.) Finally she said I was done learning the levitation.
“So what’s next?” I asked.
“Follow me upstairs. I have a surprise.” Twilight said cheerfully, heading upstairs.
Ignoring any stupid thoughts that came to mind when she’d said that, I followed her up the staircase. It was too dark to see. She must’ve covered the windows and turned off the lights.
“I can’t see two feet- uh, hooves- um, steps in front of me…” I muttered, feeling the wall for a light switch.
Not finding one, I magically lit my horn for light, and was scared (And by that I mean surprised) by a group of ponies jumping out at me, shouting “Surprise!” to which I reacted by falling down the stairs backwards.
“Ow- What was that?!” I exclaimed from the bottom as the some of the ponies above descended.
“Are you alright?” Lyra said as she came over to check me. I nodded in reply, rising back to my hooves.
“That was a surprise, for a surprise party. You haven’t had one before?” Twilight asked.
“Can’t say I have. By the way, next time, wait ‘till I move away from the stairs?” I asked in a slightly sarcastic tone. “Why the party?”
A bubblegum colored mare with a mane like a pink cloud hopped up in front of me, and said something so quickly that I couldn’t understand one word of it. I recognized her as the mare who’d gasped at me and fled last I’d seen her.
I blinked once. “What?”
She repeated herself, slower this time. “I said, we wanted to throw you a welcome party so you can meet everypony!”
“A welcoming party…?” I said quietly, slightly taken aback that they’d go to that much trouble over me, who was essentially a stranger. “That’s… That’s really, really-”
“Awesome?” A blue-coated Pegasus with a multicolored-mane finished for me.
I pointed at her and nodded, a grin on my face. “What she said. You guys really didn’t have to, but I’m kinda glad you did!”
“Well, come back upstairs with us. Everyone’s waiting!” Said the pegasus, flying up the stairs.
After about an hour or so, my mind was a puzzle of half-remembered names and faces, along with a burning sensation in my throat from the mishap with the drinks. (Seriously, who in the right mind would serve hot sauce as a beverage? At least there was some apple cider on hoof so I could put out the fire in my mouth.) I’d talked with everypony, introducing myself, telling them I was from some far off place that nobody had heard of. Surprisingly many ponies rolled with it, and those who didn’t pretended they’d heard of it.
I stepped outside for a moment to cool off. That amount of living things, people OR ponies, should not be crammed into such a poorly ventilated area.
I noticed someone else was out here, a pegasus with a dark, red-brown mane and coat the same shade of red as sunset. Her eyes were strange, green irises and purple pupils. She had on a pendant with two crescents, facing opposite directions and connected at the back.
“Uh… Hello?” I said.
She looked up at me, and seemed incredibly surprised. Not ‘surprise party’ surprised, but almost fearfully so.
“I… I…” She stammered.
“I don’t think we’ve met. I’m Ian.” I held out a hoof to shake.
She quickly glanced at the hoof like it was holding a knife, then at her own hoof, which was holding something silver, then turned and bolted away, taking flight after about ten seconds of running.
Was it something I said? I thought, scowling slightly. Is my breath still spicy?
My thoughts were interrupted by Spike, who had a lampshade on his head.
“Hey! Your missing your party!”
“Heh, right. Hey lets go see if AppleJack has any cider left.” I followed him back inside.
(Don’t worry, it was non-Alcoholic.)
I promptly lost the cider chugging contest to the pink mare, who’s name I remembered was Pinkie Pie. Everyone began heading home a couple hours later, Lyra and I being the last, aside from twilight and her friends.
“Thanks again you guys. That was an awesome party.”
“No problem!” said Rainbow Dash. (Her name was so painfully obvious that I face-hoofed for not guessing it earlier.) She gave me a high hoof, which I nearly missed.
“It was a pleasure to meet you dear.” Said Rarity. (Still can’t quite pinpoint what that accent is.)
“Ditto.” I replied.
“I’msohappyyoulikeditIhadnoIdeawhatyou’dwantinaparty!” said Pinkie Pie in that high speed whir of a voice.
“I’m not exactly sure either.” I said, grinning. “Congrats on the cider chugging contest, by the way.”
“It was nice meeting you…” whispered FlutterShy.
“You too.” I whispered back, winking to let her know I was just teasing. “Uh, by the way, you might want to keep that rabbit away from the hot-sauce from now on.”
“Oh, I’m so sorry…” She whispered.
“Nah, Don’t worry. I’m fine.” I gestured to my head, which, thankfully, had been put out soon after catching fire.
I nodded to AppleJack, then asked “Work same time tomorrow?”
“Eeyup.” She said, mimicking her brother.
“Lessons too, Twilight?” I asked my tutor.
She nodded.
“Alright! Goodbye everyone, it was nice meeting you all tonight! See you around.” I said as we parted ways, a chorus of goodbyes calling back in reply as Lyra and I headed back to her house.
“So, uh, Lyra, did you have a good time?” I asked, trying to strike up a conversation with my friend and landlady.
“Hm? Oh! Oh, of course I did.” She said.
“Good, good, that’s, uh, great…”
Lyra was staring at me, scowling, obviously thinking of something.
“Uh… do I have something on my face or something? Is my mane still smoldering?” I asked.
“No, no, it’s perfectly fine.” She said, still staring. “But… something is off…”
“I don’t really notice anything.” I said.
“Hm… I guess you’re right…” She said, and she stopped staring at me.
We continued back to her house, bade each other good night, and went straight to our respective sleeping places.
I rolled over on the couch. It was only three in the morning by then, according to my phone, but I couldn’t sleep. I was restless, I had too much energy, I’m not even sure exactly what kept me up.
I had to burn it off somehow, so I decided to go for a walk in the woods. What did Twilight say they were called…? The Everfree forest, I think that was it.
Discord is a Jerk, and Magic can hurt.
I’m not so sure what everyone avoids this place for, I thought as I walked in the Everfree forest. I mean, it’s a little humid and overgrown, but not unpleasant.
I was walking along what I assumed was some kind of animal’s path, barely lit as the canopy of leaves blocked nearly all the moonlight. The path was lined with eerie looking trees, but I paid them little attention, as I was focused more on not tripping over the roots underhoof. It was rather strange how grass grew underneath here. Surely the forest floor would be covered in dead, decomposing leave and-
I stopped, hearing a sound, a twig snapping. I turned around. Nothing there.
Probably just some wildlife, I thought. Probably harmless.
I was about to continue again, but… Something was off. I wasn’t totally sure exactly what, but something in the atmosphere gave it an air of tension.
I turned around again, and saw a pair of glowing, yellow eyes. The eyes belonged to some kind of tree monster-thing, vaguely reminiscent vaguely of a dog.
Whatever it was, it was growling at me, slowly approaching.
Ohgodohgodohgodohgod, I silently panicked, backing away from the tree-dog-creature.
A second growl joined the first, and judging by the hot breath on my rear end, I knew there was another behind me.
I’m not exactly proud of what I did next, but it was necessary.
I ran. I ran deep into the woods, far off any path I’d been following. I heard those beasts in hot pursuit. It was only a matter of time before I tired, or was obstructed. They’d catch up, and I’d be toast.
“My, my, we’ve gotten our self into a little predicament, haven’t we?” Said a familiar voice in a mocking tone.
I looked around, still running full speed ahead. “Where the hell are you Dis-”
I’d stopped looking where I was going, which was the first mistake. The second was that I’d distracted myself with that stupid blender-made god. The third was crashing into a tree wider around than the library.
“Owww…” I said, wincing as I touched my jaw, which had been the first thing to hit the tree.
“Hello again, my inter-realm friend.” Discord said, materializing overhead. “It seems you managed to get lost in a dangerous place?”
“You don’t – ow – say?” I said, fairly annoyed at the Draconequus. “What do you want?”
“Me? Oh, nothing.” He said, drifting overhead. “Just checking in on my favorite and most volatile friend.”
I don’t have time for this, I thought. Those dogs could be right behind me.
I got up and started to turn away, but Discord reappeared again right in front of me.
“Whoa easy there. I noticed you were in a bit of a pickle here.” He said. “I was wondering if you’d want some help from your oh-so-very sorry friend.”
“You? What the hell could you do? Give them searchlights?” I snapped.
I heard one of the dogs howling.
“Yes please.” I said. By this point, I was so terrified I was willing to ask this guy for help.
“Oh, this is going to be so fun!” he said.
He poked me in the forehead with a claw, and, everything went blurry for a second.
--30 SECONDS LATER--
“… What the hell was that?!” I shouted, now backed against the tree. “What was that even supposed to do?!”
He’d left right after ‘helping’ me. By then the tree-dogs had caught up, and now there were seven of them surrounding me, and I had nowhere to run.
“… I hate you, you sick, twisted bastard!” I screamed at the sky.
Something in front of me exploded into a shower of splinters and twigs.
The dogs… they’d all exploded, just like the vase, the pillar, all those things before had.
Brushing off the fine layer of wood from my front, I stepped away from the tree, trying to ignore the little streams of blood that ran down from some parts of my body. Thankfully my sweatshirt had taken the brunt of the shrapnel for me. I kicked at one of the splintered skulls of the tree-dogs’ corpses.
“Damn dogs…” I muttered.
I saw the sun was starting to rise. I must’ve been out here longer than I thought. I began wandering through the woods, attempting to find my way out. I fumed about how useless Discord had been back there, how stupid I was to actually go to the one place everyone who actually lived in the area dared not go, and most of all, how completely and utterly lost I was. Anything within a foot of me seemed to burst, from trees to stones to little insects. Any other animals in the forest that may have wanted to mess with me were likely driven off by this, or maybe the furious mutterings of ‘Stupid Draconequus’ and ‘Damn plant-dogs’.
Finally, hours after the wolf attack, I found my way out of that stupid forest. I was somewhere along the edge of Ponyville, in some kind of park, and I could see Lyra’s house from where I was.
By now I was a wreck. My face and chest were covered in splinters and blood, my hair looked like a bird’s nest, complete with leaves and twigs, my hoodie was torn in several places, and looked like I’d been running a marathon in a dust storm thanks to my chase through the dirt and mud of the woods.
“God… No one’s going to want to see me like this…” I said softly, looking at my reflection in the town’s decorative water fountain. “Not much I can really do about it right now.”
I walked over to lyra’s house. No one was home, and there wasn’t a note.
Lyra probably thought I went to work, I surmised. Good. She doesn’t need to see me like this.
I headed into the bathroom to wash up and clean up. I was able to get most of the splinters out of me and clean up the trickles of blood. I had a nasty bruise welling up on my chin, and a gash by the corner of my mouth, probably from a stick slashing across it when the dogs exploded. There wasn’t much I could do about the tears in my sweatshirt either.
I sighed in frustration, then checked the wall clock in the living room. It was already past noon. I’ve been up for more than twenty four hours now. I’m incredibly late for my job, was attacked in a forest by plants, practically broke my jaw against a tree, and had a run in with a completely maniacal deity.
Absolutely a waste of a sleepless night, I thought. Dammit.
Now the question was where do I even go at this point? If I showed up this late, there’s little doubt I’d be fired. Even the explanation for why I was would sound crazy, even to me. And I was there.
Bah. So what? It’s the truth. I thought. Besides, maybe that’s normal here.
So I headed over to sweet apple acres to explain myself.
“…So that’s what happened.” I concluded.
Needless to say, AppleJack was mortified at my initial appearance. After convincing her she didn’t need to get the first aid kit, I explained to her what had happened. She was skeptical at first, but as soon as I mentioned Discord and what he did, she started believing me.
“Discord!” She exclaimed once I finished recounting my tale. “That darned old crazy-”
“Lunatic?” I supplied. “Menace? Abomination? Utter waste of space and life?”
“The second one. We have to go tell Twilight about this!”
“Why? What she going to do that you or me can’t?”
“Twilight can tell the Princess, and we need her to use the Elements of Harmony.” Applejack explained. “C’mon! Let’s hurry!”
ApleJack began running in the direction of Twilight’s house, with me scrambling to keep up.
“Whoa, wait, the elements of what ?” I asked.
“The Elements of Harmony. We can use them to turn him to stone!”
“Why hasn’t this been done before?” I asked.
“It has, but we tried to reform him so he’d stop doin’ this kinda thing!”
“And we can all see how well that turned out.” I mumbled. “You should have smashed him when he was made of rock.”
“Huh?”
“Nothing. “
We arrived at the tree house and explained what had happened to Twilight. She said she’d suspected Discord was up to something when he brought me here. When I recounted what he did to help me, she looked at AppleJack, who looked back and nodded.
“Ian, please hold still for a minute.” Twilight said.
Twilight walked toward me, her horn glowing. She touched it to my forehead. I swear it split my head open. I felt like she was driving a knife in my forehead. It burned. It showed a few images of me through her eyes, but that ended quickly. After that it was just a white oblivion, a void filled with the skull-splitting pain.
I pulled away from her. I was furious.
“WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT?!” I shouted. Several books in the room burst into a flurry of pages the wooden horse head carving on the table exploded in a manner similar to the wooden beasts from earlier.
“Why would you DO that, you damnable shut-in bookworm!?” I raged. “You thoughtless half-wit! That hurt, dammit!”
“Hey! Don’t you go yellin’ at-” AppleJack interrupted.
“Oh, shut up you tree-kicking false-accented waste of space! You didn’t stop ‘Little Ms. Genius’ over there from doing that bull crap!” I screamed as more objects were reduced to scraps and slivers. “You two are completely useless! GOD , why am I stuck here with these MORONS !?”
Twilight had tears in her eyes, and Applejack turned away from me. Spike ran down the stairs to see what was happening. “What’s-?”
“Oh look, the servant boy is here. Do yourself a favor and run far, far away from this place.” I said to him as the door shattered behind me. “I sure am glad as hell I am.”
I left the library as a broken mess.
Ditzy was right outside, a letter in her mouth.
“What the hell are you looking at?” I snapped. “NOTHING HAPPENED.”
I walked far away from the library, and found myself back at the fountain. Someone else was there. It was that mare from the night before, the one who turned and bolted when I tried to talk to her. Her eyes were puffy and bloodshot, as if she’d been crying recently.
This time she came over and spoke to me.
“Excuse me…” She asked, stepping in front of me.
“What?” I snapped at her.
“I believe I know someone who’s looking for you. He requested me to take you to him.” She said, not looking me in the eyes.
“Who? Oh wait, let me guess.” I said in a mocking tone. “Discord wants to apologize?”
“No, not him. Please, come with-”
“Listen, I’m not some gullible idiot like you’d find in the rest of the town.” I said spitefully. “I’m not-”
She sprung forward and clasped something around my foreleg. “Yes, you are. Otherwise, that doesn’t come off.”
She’d put on the disperser. Suddenly I knew what had felt so wrong this whole time. I hadn’t put it back on after the party. She must’ve taken it- That was what she had in her hoof last night.
“Who the hell do you think you are?! Take it off right now, you little bit-”
She flew around behind me and shoved my face into the fountain, and kept me under. I was unable to breath, and I couldn’t get her off me. I was drowning in ten inches of water.
“I knew you’d be difficult. I knew it…” I heard her say as I blacked out.
Darkness, inside and out.
My head was throbbing, almost as hard as my heart. I couldn’t see. My mouth was very dry, and tasted like dirty cloth. I was blindfolded and gagged. My forelegs and hind legs were all bound. I could feel something rumbling around me, some kind of vehicle.
“Mm…” I groaned through my gag.
“Oh. You’re awake.” Someone said.
It was that mare. I struggled vainly against my bindings, unable to free myself.
Dammit, I can’t believe I got kidnapped by… her! Some random pony that nearly drowned me and shoved me onto what, a train? How could I have been so stupid as to have walked into a crap situation like this?!
She giggled. “Sorry. Can’t let you go yet. We’re not quite there.”
Where is this psycho taking me? I thought. And for that matter, who the hell is she?
I waited for what seemed like forever. The train stopped, and the mare said nothing. I was starting to think we’d stay on and keep going until she picked me up and threw me out the window of the train. I landed hard on my face, and my nose started bleeding. I struggled against my bonds, but again, to no avail. The mare followed me out and began dragging me by the tail across the ground. I could’ve sworn I heard her sobbing.
Why is she crying? I thought. I’m the one being kidnapped!
She dragged me far. I don’t know how far, but it was far enough to tear holes in my sweatshirt. At some point it started to snow, and the ground beneath me became frosted and icy, later turning to plain snowdrifts.
This is great. I’m bound and gagged, having my ass frozen off, being dragged through a barren tundra by some chick with mental issues, I lamented. Worst of all, I haven’t the slightest clue as to where I’m being taken.
After another long period of time, she stopped. She adjusted her hold on me (I don’t want to know with what) then she dragged me by the leg bindings up a flight of stairs. I heard the sound of a door creaking open, and she pulled me into some kind of building. Another door was opened, and I was forced up into a sitting position. The blindfold and gag were removed, and I found myself in a castle made of what looked like black glass, or polished stone. In front of me was a black unicorn with a curved, red horn. He wore some kind of crown, and had on a black and red robe. His eyes were purple-green, and stared directly at me.
“So… you finally managed to get him here.” He said, his voice a cross between a snake-like tone and the kind of voice expected by a cannon if it were able to talk.
“I-I did the b-best I could, my King…” The mare stuttered nervously.
“Mm… Yes, but it could’ve been so much faster.” He said softly. “Leave. I need to speak to the boy.”
“Y-Yes, my liege.” She said, backing out of the room.
Until this point I’d been too stunned by the appearance of the king and my own injuries to say anything. But now I was ready to vent my frustrations.
“WHAT. THE. HELL!?!” I shouted at him. “Why in the God damn HELL did you have me dragged up to this freezing wasteland you call a home, you pompous bastard!?”
The king was silent. Then he started to laugh, a deep, echoing laugh that sent chills down my already frozen bones.
“You honestly don’t know?” He said at last. “I’ve been watching you, boy. I know of your excessive magic. You need a mentor.”
“You?” I asked incredulously. “You think I’ll let some demented king who sent people to kidnap me give me lessons in magic?!”
“Yes.” Said the king, glaring at me. “Otherwise, that ‘demented king’ will kill you in the slowest and most painful way in his power.”
It was my turn to be silent. Was he serious? I wasn’t sure. He didn’t exactly give me an invite in the mail, and his whole attitude definitely fit the ‘murderous evil king’ stereotype.
“Uh… I… um…” I didn’t know how to respond to that.
“So you will then?”
“Well… not exactly much of a choice.” I said.
“Excellent.” The king said, a malicious smile forming on his face.
The king, whose name I learned was Sombra, untied me with his magic, then had the mare show me where my quarters were. It was a simple room crafted from the same black stone as the rest of the castle, and so was the furniture. No windows, but the room was still lit somehow. The restroom was adjacent.
I cannot BELIEVE what has just happened, I thought, staring at the battered face in the mirror. I’ve just been kidnapped and put under death threat if I don’t take lessons from some king in the middle of the goddamn tundra. I don’t know where anyone I’ve met is, and even if they knew where I was, would they even… would they bother to find me…?
I splashed my face with the water in the basin of the sink. I started thinking about why this all was happening to me. Why I was the subject of this bull crap. Why it was me being picked on. Why I couldn't have lead a normal life. It dawned on me at last, so brightly and obvious that I couldn’t believe I hadn’t thought of it: Discord is to blame.
That impossibly crazy bastard brought me here. He forced me to live in this puke-worthy bat-shit crazy world. He made me at ticking time bomb, and set me against the only ones who bothered to help me.
I looked in the mirror. An angry, shadowy-eyed me looked back, as if challenging me: What, is the little baby gonna cry? Can’t handle real life? Poor little bastard, can't take a few blows, can't you?
I smashed the mirror. “Damn them! Damn the king, damn Celestia, damn Twilight, damn the bitch who brought me here,” I muttered, then shouted, venting all my anger “and most of all, Go to hell Discord, you psychopathic, jerk-wad, absolutely useless, life-ruining BASTARD!”
I heard an electrical snap, like a static shock, and then the crystalline wall in front of me shattered with the force of a grenade. I was thrown out the door back into my new room, slammed into the wall, where I lay unconscious for God knows how long.
Oh no, I panicked. Ohnoohnoohnoohno!
I can’t believe he actually broke it! Ian broke the inhibitor! Oh god, Sombra is gonna kill me!
I dragged Ian over onto his bed, and did my best to remove the shards he’d blown into himself. With no medical supplies on hand, I dressed his wounds with what was left of his hoodie. It’s already torn and bloody, and by this point it’s a lost cause anyway.
I noticed his chest was still rising and falling. He’s… he’s still breathing. That’s good, breathing is good.
He’d been lucky not to have impaled himself with any of the shrapnel. If he had, I don’t know if he’d have… Best not think that way. He’s alive, and that’s what’s important.
Alive… I wonder if he even knows I’m alive. Or even who I am. Would it matter to him if he did? Would he hate me? Would he even care? I don’t even know… I can’t even tell him, or Sombra will-
Hoofsteps. Oh god, hoofsteps! He’s coming, what do I do what do I do, what do I do-?!
“WHAT HAS JUST HAPPENED HERE!?!” He roared.
“H-he kinda broke the inhibitor…” I said quietly.
“He WHAT?!”
“I don’t know! I wasn’t in the room, I just came in when I heard the explosion, and-”
“SILENCE! I told you to WATCH HIM!” Sombra advanced on me, his horn ablaze with black energy.
“I-I’m sorry, I-”
“Sorry,” He said. “Does not cut it!”
Pain. Searing, unendurable pain, shooting across my body from my chest outward. I collapsed to the floor, screaming, gasping for air, curling up into a ball. I don’t know how long I lay there. I couldn’t even think, my head was blinded by the liquid fire in my blood.
Eventually he relented. I lay there, unable to move, the only sound I can even make is a weak whimper. I try to look over to Ian, but Sombra blocks my view.
“If anything like this happens again,” He said. “You will be disposed of, your friend in full knowledge of who you are to him, and what I’ll do to you.”
I begin crying. The king walks out of the room, slamming the door.
That stupid Pendant! I hate him so much, but if I disobey, he does this! I don’t want to do this to Ian! I don’t want to work for Sombra, be his slave! I don’t want to help him…! I don’t… I don’t want to hurt anyone…
Magic, Cycles, and the Last Straw
I awoke to eerie silence, like that of a graveyard. The wall I'd blown apart was restored. My sweatshirt was a ragged bit of cloth, now barely recognizable as clothing. The disperser was on the bedside table, but it looked like it had been caught in an explosion, which, ironically, it was designed to prevent. But the strangest thing about my awakening was that none of the wounds I'd accumulated as of thus yet had vanished, even from the most recent explosion. Had I been unconscious for that long?
I got up and headed over to the door, which had been left slightly ajar. I saw a flash of movement behind it when I opened it, and saw the mare from before, her back to the door.
I cleared my throat to let her know I was there. "Excuse me-"
She turned around, then said "Please, come with me." She immediately began walking down the hallway, without looking to see whether I was following.
Of course, I didn't exactly have much else I could be doing. I let the mare lead me to another part of the fortress, and opened a door into gigantic room, reminiscent of a gymnasium, or a stadium. I saw targets hung up on the walls across the room, and giant black pillars of crystal lined the walls between them. King Sombra stood by the center, next to a few pony dummies.
"Ah," said the king walking towards me. "So he finally woke up. Tell me, are you ready?"
"For what, exactly?" I asked.
"Training. You broke the disperser, so we must begin immediately, or risk you destroying the castle." he said.
"Oh." I said, bitterly. "Well excuse me for being a little mad at the prospect of a death threat."
"No matter." The king said, walking to the wall furthest away from the dummies, with me following. "Stand here. You are to destroy the dolls without moving from this spot."
"Why?" I asked.
"I require a demonstration of power to see what kind of mess I have to work with. Now, destroy them."
I turned to the dolls. I focused on the one in the middle, imagining it being blown apart just like everything else I hated had. The magic sparked, and the doll blew apart, it's fluff-filled limbs scattering across the room.
"Sloppy, wasteful, loud, and a general failure." The king said. "Do as I do."
The king turned to one of the other dolls, and a silent bolt of black energy streaked from his horn to the doll, incinerating it on the spot.
Holy crap... I thought, gaping at the king in awe. That was crazy, he just cremated it like it was nothing.
"You want me to do that?" I asked.
"That or more, boy." He said.
I turned to the third doll, which had been blown onto it's side by my attack on the first. I tried to envision it turning to ash, a flash of energy like Sombra had used streaking from my horn to the dummy. At first, nothing seemed to happen. Then the magic blast came forth, igniting the dummy, but not incinerating it.
"Hm. You lack the focus necessary to destroy it. Disappointing." The king noted. "Very disappointing."
Shut up, I thought angrily. It was my first try.
We moved on to other spells, and most of my attempts failed miserably. I was nowhere near the level of skill the king possessed. He gave me tasks in magic that I preformed on a mediocre level, then was severely outdone as he demonstrated the proper way to do it. The frustration alone was bad enough, but being outdone added insult to injury. The whole lesson was severely draining on me, and I soon was completely out of energy.
The king sent me back to my room when it became apparent that I was unable to produce any more energy than a spark. I stayed there for he remainder of the day, to exhausted to do anything else.
The mare came in shortly with a small plate of bread and a glass of water. I was literally starving. I don't know how long it had been since I last ate. The simple meal was devoured in less than a minute, and she took the platter away before I had a chance to say anything to her.
Dead tired and lacking distractions, I lay down on the bed, and fell into an exhausted, dreamless sleep.
Things continued like this for quite a long time. I'd be awoken by the nameless mare, taken to the training chamber where I'd work with the king for countless hours, return to my room to eat an inadequate meal, and collapse on the bed to sleep.
I was tired. More so than I could ever remember being before. I was in pain, in the head and in the heart. I couldn't defy Sombra- he made it clear he would kill me if I did- and doing as he said was just barely better than death.
I'm not going to take the easy way out, I'd think to myself. There's always a chance I could find a way out. Sombra could release me, or I could escape and- and do what?
I had no money, no credentials, and I'd spited the only ponies who'd shown me any compassion. I'd be alone. Nothing left. What drove me to continue? At that point, anything- Vengeance, spite, or some other small glimmer of hope. I still don't know.
It wasn't for a long time that the cycle was broken- there was a single night where I had a dream. A nightmare, possibly. It was the last night I slept in the fortress.
I was in the training room, alone, the only other thing in the room was one of the training dummies. Sombra appeared by my side.
"Destroy it." He said, the thunder of his voice reverberating through the room. "Destroy it, child."
I turned to do so, but it wasn't the same dummy. It... it looked like Lyra. I blinked, then it looked like Twilight. I turned away. What the hell was going on? Turning back, it looked like someone I didn't know.
The new mare looked like a color-inverted version of Celestia. She wore a black crown and shoes, and had a cutie mark of a moon in the night sky, similarly to the starry mane she had. Her coat was navy bluish hue. Her teal-colored eyes held my own in their steely gaze.
"IAN CAMRON!" She said, her voice projecting like a megaphone.
"Present." I said without thinking. (What can I say? She reminded me of my teacher.)
The mare walked up to me. She was taller, so I had to look up to to keep eye contact. "Thou art unharmed?"
I was slightly caught off guard by the weird speech pattern but responded intelligibly. "Yeah... Who are you?"
"I? I am the princess of the night," The mare said. "Princess Luna!"
"Oh goody. Another high and mighty ruler to boss me around." I muttered. "This time without a volume dial."
"Excuse me?!" the princess exclaimed, obviously displeased.
"Oh, nothing your highness."
Her eyes narrowed, but she inquired no further about my rude remark. "Ian Camron, my sister sent me to find thee, and if necessary, rescue thee. Where art thou?"
"Oh, hell if I know. Somewhere north? Not that it matters all that much. I'm better off here than I was in Ponyville." I lied. "I like it here. Sombra teaches me more-"
"Sombra? The tyrant of the Crystal Empire!?" Luna jumped, eyes widening."Ian, quickly, thou mustn't fall under his influence, lest he shall-"
"King. He's. King." I interrupted, something in me finally snapping. "And he's been like a father to me. Granted, a disapproving, overbearing father, but preferable to all you... you..." I sighed in exasperation. "I cannot think of a word that can accurately describe how much I despise you damn ponies."
I was sick of ponies telling me what to do. Celestia, Twilight, and now the negative photo.
"You know what? I'm DONE with all you ponies thinking you can tell me what to do. I am FINISHED with all your rules and restrictions. Sombra is my mentor, my king, my guiding hoof." I ranted, aggression and anger fueling my tirade. "You and Celestia can go to hell for all I care! You know what? I'd ENJOY it to see you there. I don't need you, her, or anyone else- Sombra is my King, and I do as HE says."
I turned my horn at Luna and shot at her with a blast of energy. She exploded into doll limbs and stuffing, and I was awoken, all my shame, disappointment, pain, and guilt igniting into the intense, burning hatred that now was what drove me.
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Seige on Canterlot | Part One | Truth be Told
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Seige on Canterlot | Part Two | Rebirth of the Emperor
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Seige on Canterlot | Part Three | Change of Heart and Mind
Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter. The Runaway and The Savior
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Abandoning the Chaos Land- The Deception Uncovered
Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter. A Serene Sorrow and a Search Party
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