Equestria's Funniest Heros from Beyond

While Israel was getting the crap beaten out of him by Applejack, John had encouraged the rest of the girls to just sit back, relax, and enjoy the show while having some milkshakes and cupcakes. Twilight protested it at first because she didn't feel right watching a human getting beaten, even if he did insult Applejack by accident. But slowly, Twilight found that seeing Israel getting pulverized seemed to make her smile a bit, but she still felt a lot of guilt. Rainbow Dash found it too hilarious to stop, Fluttershy was covering her eyes from Applejack's brutality and Pinkie Pie was just sipping her milkshake, enjoying the show.

Applejack finally stopped after 5 minutes of pulverizing the older human. Israel was covered in bruises and bandages, seeing stars as his eyes started spiraling left and right.

"Why me?" Israel asks himself.

"Serves ya right fer makin' fun o' ma accent. I hope ya learned yer lesson." Applejack says, panting and smirking.

"Youse lucky I'm a guy, otherwise I would've gotten back atcha, "part'ner!" Israel says, still dizzy.

"Ya want me to shut yer yap fer ya fer good? I can do that...if I weren't so tired." Applejack says, glaring

"Here's an idea, Applejack. I know exactly how you can punish him without pulverizing him." John says.

"Who's side are you on, anyways?!" Israel asks.

"The ponies." John replies simply.

"Damn you." Israel glares

"Watch your profanity." John points at Israel.

"I'm 21 years old, I'll say whatever the h-" Israel got cut off by Pinkie Pie as she jumped onto his head, covering his mouth with her forehooves to stop him from cursing again.

"Uh-uh-uh! Remember, our show is targeted towards kids!" Pinkie says, all chipper.

'DANGIT PINKIE!!!' Israel thought.

"Now as I was saying, how about as punishment, he can work at your farm for a whole week. He needs to burn off a few calories from all the pizza he eats, anyways." John explains to Applejack.

"Well, looks like somepony has a good chip on their shoulders. I think I might just do that." Applejack says, smirking at Israel who still had his mouth covered by Pinkie, struggling to get her off. "Now you listen here, partner, startin' tomorrow, y'all are gonna be workin' fer me as punishment fer makin' fun o' me. Do ya have anythang to say?" Israel finally managed to toss Pinkie off of him.

"Yeah, not that I don't like to work, but what if I refused." Israel retorted.

"I'll sick Big Mac on ya." Applejack retorts with a smirk.

Israel then got all sweaty and a bit scared as he knew how tough the big guy can be. He may be shy, but taking a beating from Big Mac would be like getting hit by a freight train. He sighed in defeat and looked at AJ with a more serious look.

"What time do I start?" Israel asks.

"6 A.M sharp." she replies

'6 A.M?! It's like she's trying to kill me! If only Equestria had electricity and if only I had brought my ipod, Playstation, and my 2DS, I'd be easing my boredom...then again, that's what keeps me up at night.' Israel thought to himself. "Fine, I'll be there at 6 A.M sharp." he says to Applejack out loud.

"Excellent partner." Applejack says, with a cute smile.

"John, I swear, when we get home, you're gonna get a good ol' fashion trollin'." Israel says, glaring at John.

"Oh yeah, I'd like to see you try." John says.

"You want to brawl right now? I'll bring it to ya!"

"Come at me, bro!"

Israel and John then got into a brawl making Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie laugh their flanks off.

"It's like watching a fight between a gorilla and an orangatang." Rainbow says.

"Yeah, but who's the gorilla and who's the orangatang?" Pinkie asks.

Twilight intervened and levitated the boys away from each other while they were trying to grab each other.

'Ugh, why did this have to happen?' Twilight asks in her thoughts.

Israel and John were sleeping in their seperate rooms peacefully at Twlight's castle, until Israel's alarm clock went off at 5:30 A.M. Israel then reached for the nightstand to turn off his clock. His third attempt finally shut it up and he woke up with a grunt of disgust.

'Stinkin' John, why'd he have to recommend that?' Israel thought as he stretched himself. He got himself out of bed and changed out of his pjs and put on a black shirt and blue jeans. He went to the bathroom to shower and brush his teeth. It took him 15 minutes to finally be fully ready for his first big job.

Since Sweet Apple Acres was a 20 minute walk from where he was, he had to jog over there. Luckily everypony else was still fast asleep so he didn't have to worry about them freaking out about him. He didn't really give a crap about if he looked scary to other ponies, in fact he might enjoy the fact that he's scary, since he was never feared back on Earth.

He made it to Sweet Apple Acres in 10 minutes flat but he was a bit out of breath from the jog. Applejack came out of the house and saw him near the apple orchard.

"Looks like you made it 5 minutes early." Applejack say, proudly.

"I may act like an ass at times, but when it comes to work or school, I'm punctual." Israel says.

"That's good, now, since ya don't have the buckin' power in yer legs, why don'tcha go ahead and feed the pigs?" Applejack says as she walks towards one of the apple trees.

" 'Kay 'kay." Israel says.

Most of the day went on unexpectedly well, even thought there were a few bumps on the road for Israel. During the time he was working on the barn, he got flattened by stampeding pigs as they feasted on their meals, fell in pig crap, and even had a few apples fall on his head as he was collecting some of the baskets full of apples. AJ's little sister Applebloom couldn't helep but laugh out loud seeing the poor human going through a tough time.

"Quit laughing you little tyke or the joke'll be on you." Israel says.

"Oh come on, mister, it ain't that ba-" Applebloom paused and then started to yell in disgust since she smelt the pig poo on Israel and who could blame her, it STANK!!!

"Hey Applebloom, would ya mind lettin' the big guy do his job he...UGH, dagnabbit, I told ya to watch out with the pig poo, now ya smell like a carton o' decade old apples. Pee-U!" Applejack says, waving her hoof left and right near her face.

"Hey, don't blame me, those warthogs trampled over me like rodeo bulls charging after a red cape." Israel says, trying to wipe off the pig poo from his whole body.

"Well, best ya git all that poo offa ya." Applejack led Israel towards the entrance to the barn and grabbed a watering hoes, turned it on and rinsed him off. There were still poo stains on his clothes, but it washed away most of the stink.

"I don't get it, AJ. Yesterday, you were trying to kill me and now you're being nice to me, even after I insulted you, by accident at that, what made you change your mind?" he asked.

"Well, I figure since I wasn't aware you said those things in my accent by accident, I kinda lost all thought and had it replaced with the uncontrollable anger you felt first hoof. Sorry partner." Applejack says.

"Why are YOU sorry, I was the one who blabbed my mouth first. I did deserve that beating. For the record, the country voice tends to get contagious since I use it a lot where I lived." Both Israel and Applejack then started to laugh.

"Ya know, Israel, you're alright, even though yer rough around the edges. But if anythang, yer kinda funny." Applejack says, giving Israel a playful punch on his arm since he was kneeling down.

"You're pretty cool as well, AJ. But after I'm done with this job today, I'm gonna give John a healthy serving of whup-ass."

"Don'tcha think yer bein' too hard on him, I mean, he is yer friend."

"Yeah, but sometimes, he gets me roped into things I do NOT feel comfortable in. But you know, I think maybe I'm being too harsh, I mean he's still a teenager and I'm a full grown adult. Maybe I should hold off until he's 18 years old."

"Speakin' of adult, how's yer love life?"

"You just cut straight to the point, don't you? I don't got a girlfriend, but I'm not too worried about it."

"Why? Have ya takin' a liking to one of us?"

"Well, I consider Fluttershy a 'waifu' like some of the other bronies, but for now, you and the girls are like friends to me."

"That's alright sugarcube, as long as yer honest. But what in tarnation is a "waifu?"

"It's an otaku term for when you're mentally married to a fictional character. It's 'husbando' for the girls, though."

"So ah see. So Fluttershy is yer waifu? Why is that?"

"She's adorable, kind, caring, and she loves animals like I do."

"That's nice, well we'd better get back to work if we're gonna git all these apples harvested fer the farmers market."

"You got it."

After their conversation, Israel and Applejack started getting back to work. Applejack continued to buck apple trees and Israel collected the baskets of apples and carried them over to the wagon. The progress went on smoothly for a whole hour. Finally, after the day was done, Big Mac took the wagon with him, and Applejack followed him. She waved goodbye to Israel as she left and let him know that he finally had the day off.

Meanwhile with John, he spent some time in the library chatting with Starlight, his so-called 'waifu,' and Spike. They were sharing a few jokes to help break the ice after a stressful day, organizing the books with Spike in Twilight's library.

"John, I gotta tell you, that stunt you pulled yesterday was hilarious!" Spike says, trying to contain his laughter.

"It wasn't a stunt, it was a suggestion. His agony amuses me sometimes." John says to the little dragon.

"Don't you think that was a bit harsh about what you said just now?" Starlight asked. "It's never a good idea to think it's amusing to see your best friend in agony."

"Starlight, just because we fight and we think it's funny, doesn't mean we hate our guts. He knows that I don't mean it and I know he doesn't mean it when he sees me in agony and thinks it's amusing. We've been friends since I was only 8. He's been nothing but fun ever since we became best pals." John explains.

"So how did you two meet?" Starlight asked.

"We started out as neighbors from across the street. I'd invite him over to my house and we'd either fool around with his video camera and post funny YouTube videos and sometimes play video games. We even play with the dogs a lot. There was Maisy, Domino, Zoey, and of course, there was Blue." John says.

"Four dogs? I thought one was too much responsability, since Applejack has Winona." Spike says.

"Still, I think you're pretty lucky to have Israel as your friend." Starlight says.

"Thanks, I bet he's glad we ended up in this world. He likes you guys, but not on the same level as I do, don't get me wrong, I'm not trying to brag or anything." John says.

"Even me?" Spike asks.

"Yeah, especially since even he calls you by that cute little nickname Rarity calls you, lover boy." John says.

"What nickname?! It better not be "Spikey-Wikey!" Spike says, angerly.

"Ooh, you're a sharp guesser." John says.

"Why that no-good!!! Just wait until I roast his flank!!!" Spike says, stomping off, blushing.

"Feisty, ain't he?" John asks Starlight.

"You have no idea." she replies back, making them both laugh.