Chapter 1 - Telepathic Speaking? Seems Legit.
Pbat and Sly's Adventure
Chapter 1 - Telepathic Speaking? Seems Legit.
ninjadatkillz
5/18/13
My symptoms to receiving a letter from Celestia herself (besides passing out) included but were not limited to: punching myself to see if it was real, and metaphorically shitting myself. In my dream like state, I thought hard. This was every brony's dream, and apparently, I was in it. Maybe this was some sort of heaven, or maybe I got transported into someones dreams. Or there is the slim chance, almost no chance, that somehow, I actually did get teleported into Equestria. In other words, shit just got real.
Then, I had a dream. No, not a Martin Luther King 'I Have a Dream' type of dream. An actual dream.
I found myself sitting in front of my computer, looking at my Skype with Sly. I took a second to read it, and then realized it was the same conversation I had mere minutes before going into Equestria. Minecraft was starting up as usual, and then I heard some voice.
"What the hell," the voice almost whispered, immediately recognizing it as Sly. Sly's voice was normal, but it wasn't. Probably disoriented by the dream, I thought. As bored me, I decided to hop on the computer. Usually, I didn't have this much control over my dream.
I heard the sound again, and listened more closely this time. Now, I could make out actual words. It said things ranging from "Dafaq?" to "Woah." And again, it was in Sly's voice. This was getting really creepy. I decided to see if this was a hallucination.
"Yo, Sly, you here?"
"Woah SHIT!" Sly's voice yelled. The noise from it almost made me deaf. Yep, that's him, I decided.
"Dude, you almost made me deaf. IN A DREAM!" I said, yelling out that last part to troll him.
"AHH!! SHUT UP!"
"Okay, calm you Latino tits, bro,"
"So, telepathic talking through our dreams. Seems legit," Sly muttered, but still in range of hearing.
"Yep. So what happened to you, did you faint?" I asked.
"No shit."
"Well, lets wake up," I suggested.
"Kay, see you later?"
"Yea, well bye." At this time, I willed myself to get up. Come on... AWAKE! I thought. I tried using every ounce of energy I had, and eventually, some bacon appeared in my dream world. You have got to be kidding me, I deadpanned. But realization struck me. This might be the last piece of bacon I have while I'm here. After my epiphany, I gladly wanted to chew it up. However, just millimeters from my mouth, I noticed it transformed it to a goat penis with wings and it flew away.
"What the fuck."
"What the fuck."
Sly and I suddenly said together. At this point, I was wondering what had caused this. I mean, it isn't often you see a flying penis! Whoever did this is beyond me.
"Did my bacon turn into a severed PENIS!" Sly yelled, snapping me out of my train of thought and probably the cause for my soon to be shattered eardrums. I didn't know for sure, but if by any chance that we were in Equestria, we would have to meet...
"Oh shit."
"Wassup P?"
"You do know that we're in Equestria, right?"
"Yea, that is kinda how I passed out, and probably the same goes for you, right?"
"That's not the thing that worries me. The thing that worries me, is Pinkie."
"Oh, Pinkie probably won't be too bad," Sly lied as a desperate attempt to stop me from passing out in a dream world.
"Bad? SHE'S LIKE A 5 YEAR OLD CHILD ON FUCKING COCAINE. This is bad, bad, ba-"
"I wonder if they do have cocaine here," Sly interrupted. "Besides, I thought you were the calm and collected one. I didn't know I was the mature one. Well, IMGOINGTOPLAYKINGDOMHEARTSSOSEEYALATERBYE!"
"Sly say wha?" I thought out loud. Did Sly really just pull off a Pinkie right there. Nice, now I'll probably have a cocaine addicted Latino while in my dreams. It kinda does make sense, since you probably can do anything in a dream world. At that moment, I suddenly received an Remington 870 MCS and popped into the middle of a zombie infested Wal-Mart. Lets just say, that gun is nice and powerful up close, better than any video game ever made it.
Oh shit. This was bad. I remembered all of the subs I had, my friends, my family, and most importantly, a little pet G-Pig I got a few months back. That guy was a real champ. He used to help me through all the tough times, especially through my lack of videos.
I snapped out of my thoughts as a zombie came out of an isle and tried to maul me. I didn't react quick enough, but luckily, someone else did.
"Lee-fucking-Everett," I muttered to myself. "LEE-FUCKING-EVERETT! THANK YOU, MAN! I THOUGHT YOU WERE DEAD!" If anyone doesn't know who Lee Everett is, he is the main protagonist of The Walking Dead Game. So somehow, I turned up into his universe, one he's supposed to be dead in.
"Two things. One, shut the hell up. You're going to attract more walkers, and two, how did you know who I am?" he asked, clearly suspicious of me. It isn't everyday you know someone random off the streets, and know that they almost died.
"I, uhh, saw your court trial, yea!"
"Un-huh. So, how did you know I was supposed to be dead? I thought only Clem knew. Oh, little Clem, what I'd do to see her."
"Clem is a beautiful child. I knew her before I this," I waved my arms around me, "started to happen. She doesn't deserve this."
"Well, lets go find her."
After an hour, we found her taking refuge in an old cellar on a farm. In that said cellar, we found a trap door. Under the said trap door was a fallout shelter, with a fully functioning farm, enough perishable foods for about 5 years, and a even it's own artificial room with an ongoing water cycle. To say the least, it amazed me.
"I knew the government knew something," I whispered to Lee.
"I know, right. Well, let's have a feast, then we preserve!" Unfortunately, life had other plans. A bright glow suddenly started to surround me. "Hey, you, what THE FUCK is going on with you," he asked.
"I don't know, but here's my gun and ammo," I said as I tossed him my shotgun and forty-eight 12 gauge slugs. "I'm sure we'll meet soon enough. Just ask for me. PaperBatVG."
After that, I was engulfed in the light and teleported into the actual living world.
Prologue - The Shitting of Bricks
Pba and Sly's Adventure
Prologue - The Shitting of Bricks
ninjadatkillz
4/28/13
Life is a bitch.
I awoke on a cold, stone, floor in what looked like a holding cell. I sat up and immediately felt a sharp pain throughout my body. Man, if this was Stephen, he outdid himself this time.
I took another look around to get my surroundings. There were no windows, so there was no way of escape here. There was no door, just a room with no exit. To my right, there was a bed made of, straw? Alright, I have heard of cruel, but a straw bed was pushing the boundaries. Other than that, nothing was in the room. I sighed.
Alright, so I'm stuck in a room with no means of escape, and a bed made of straw. Great. Plan B, activate, I thought.
"HELLO? ANYONE HERE?" I yelled to no one. No response.
Just perfect. Nobody here.
I thought about the moments leading up to this event.
"Hey, Sly. Dion here," I messaged one of my best friends, Eddie, on Skype. Today, we were finally recording Minecraft The Movie: 12. To me, it was a relief. My comment sections were filled with 'Do more Minecraft Movies!' or 'GODDAMMIT, WHERE'S MINECRAFT THE MOVIE 12!?!' After this, I could finally look through my comments without the repetitive questions.
"Sup Dion. What do you want?" he replied.
"Well, I gave a little leak on my Twitter for Minecraft The Movie 12. Too many people have been requesting it. Just something for two hours. You in?"
"I guess, I got nothing better to do. Keep it to a max of three, because I gotta see my girlfriend in a few."
"Alright, what mods do you want?" I asked Eddie, just to confirm.
"Just use the pack I gave you a week ago. You checked it out yet? Stephen said it was supposed to be awesome."
"Nope, how about you?" I asked Eddie, not so sure if I should trust Stephen. I've only been on a world with his mod packs once, but I soon found out he loaded some sort of ridiculous nuke mod. Apparently, he modified the map so the spawn block had a pressure plate which activated a nuke. It was no fun for either of us.
"Nope. Let me guess, you don't trust him. Well, nobody does, so that's why we're putting it on!" he exclaimed. "Besides, what could possibly go wrong?" he added.
"Now that you just said that, every possible thing," I replied, and starting up a Skype call in the process. "Ahh, much better!"
"Okay, so put the mods in the server and in your jar," Eddie said
"Yea, yea, I know how it works, you dingus. I just hope it doesn't turn out to be some sort of troll. Seriously, Stephen has a shit ton of creativity." I was not lying here. Knowing Stephen, he could just start an apocalypse with the snap of his fingers.
"Okay, I'm starting up Minecraft," I said to Eddie.
"Yea, same," he replied.
I clicked on the Minecraft logo, and suddenly, everything started to shake.
"Shit, are you feeling this?" I asked, starting to panic. It was a rare occasion for Canada to get earthquakes this far inland, let alone one of this high magnitude.
"Oh, shit! You mean some sort of level nine mag earthquake? If so, yea!" he yelled out to me, barely audible over the noise of the quake.
"Did we get nuked for playing Minecraft? I swear, if this is Ste-" is all I got to say before disappearing into a wormhole.
After leaving my thought train, I realized food and water appeared out of nowhere.
Alright, *that** was weird,* I thought. Food materializing out of thin air? Hey, food is food! I definitely ruled out Stephen as a possibility now. There is no way he could suddenly create an earthquake on his own, and teleport food into a room with no apparent openings. Whoever, or maybe in this case, whatever was behind this, will pay. But hey, you can't get revenge on an empty stomach. I grinned. Even in the worst of situations, I could make myself laugh.
I grabbed what food there was, which consisted of two apples, some carrots, and flowers? I just assumed the flowers were decoration, but still. Why prison food shouldn't consist of any type of decor.
Prison, I thought. That's how I think of this place. I guess that was an accurate description of this place. Wait a minute. I looked down at my clothes, and was surprised to see they were actually mine, and not prison attire. Realizing what this meant, I checked my pockets, and I found my phone. I turned it on to see it actually still worked.
"Yes!" I muttered to myself as my iPhone 5 glowed to life. I only had time to check my battery life before the phone disappeared out of my hands. "Oh my fucking god. You got to be kidding me!"
I hope Eddie's fine. The more I dwelled on it, the more I realized Eddie is going through the exact same thing as me. I just hoped he's coping fine. After all, he is not one you want to leave alone in an enclosed room like this one. He'll probably die of boredom, I thought as a took a sip of water. I took yet another smile. I had a sick since of humor, but hey, a champ's gotta do what a champ's gotta do.
I checked my pockets to see if my phone miraculously ended back up in there, but to my disappointment, nothing was there besides a piece of paper. Wait, this wasn't there before. I unfolded the piece of paper and read it.
Dear Dion,
I hope you are doing well in your holding cell. Don't worry, this will only be temporary. The guards and I will release you within the hour, but we had to first check if you were hostile. After all, it isn't everyday where you get somepony dropping through the ceiling of the throne room.
If you are wondering, your friend is fine. He is in the cell across from yours. He will be sent a similar letter. I know you will have lots of questions, so when I release you, feel free to ask as many after I have finished my questioning.
Sincerely,
Princess Celestia
Alright, I pretty much pissed myself right here. I read the letter multiple times, just to make sure I wasn't hallucinating. After all, it isn't everyday you get teleported to a world of cartoon ponies! After reading about five times, I passed out.