It’s an odd experience when you realize that you’ve found something very familiar in a situation that at first seems so foreign. Perhaps you can just chalk it up to human nature or adaptability or whatever, but humans in general seem to have an incredible ability to fit into whatever environment they’re thrown in. We adapt to freezing tundra, dry wastelands, and even to vast metropolises. However, you could argue that all creatures can adapt to their environments. Isn’t that what it means to evolve?

Humans, though, seem to have taken this concept one step farther. Not only can we adapt to different biomes, we can adapt to different societies. It’s truly fascinating when you really think about it. You can’t just pick an ant out of its colony, place it in a beehive, and expect it to suddenly go, “Oh, well this is my new home now. Better make the most of it.” It’s ridiculous, but humans can. Maybe it’s our higher intelligence or our conscience or…

“Empathy.”

“What was that?”

“Uh… nothing. Nevermind.”

“Whatever… So are you gonna try again or what?”

“Just… just gimme a sec.”

I take a couple of breaths while staring at my leg. Most of the bandages that once adorned the appendage have been removed and the newly formed flesh is pink and tender. I poke gently at it with my fingertips. It isn’t exactly painful, but the nerves must be very sensitive and as my fingers trace circles on my leg I experience a tickling sensation.

Still, I think. The fact that I’m even attempting to stand up is a small miracle. Ah, the wonders of modern… or I guess ‘magical’ medicine.

“Hey! You’re spacing out again,” complains Rainbow. “Don’t you want to get out of here?”

I give her a deadpan look.

“Y’know,” I begin. “Even if I do manage to stand up today I’m still gonna have be here for another week or so for physical therapy and whatever else.”

“I know that, but if you wanna make any progress you need to at least get back onto your hoo… er feet,” she replies.

I smile. I can’t help it. Her enthusiasm is infectious.

“You’d make a great football coach, y’know?”

“Football?”

I let out a small laugh.

“I’ll show you when we get outta here,” I promise and with that, place my bare toes onto the cool wooden floor of the hospital ward. I slowly tilt my body forward letting my lower body hold more and more weight. My legs slide down the edge of the bed until my heels meet the floor.

Here we go.

I’m about the cross the point of no return. Glancing upwards I see Rainbow watching me out of the corner of her eye. There was a cup of milk in her hoof (still not entirely sure how that works) as she is just finishing the breakfast that Nurse Redheart had brought in for the two of us earlier this morning. She was trying to play cool while sipping from the cup and acting like my attempts to stand up for the first time in a week were nothing special. However, now that I’m about to actually try it, Rainbow is starting to look a little nervous. She makes a move towards me, but I hold up a hand in protest.

Smiling at her, I say, “It’s a piece of cake.”

Her eyes widen as she processes my words. Then she smirks and her eyes narrow.

“Prove it.”

Alrighty then. Challenge accepted!

My legs now take on the full weight of my body and I feel the mattress slip out from underneath me. Gravity is now doing everything in its power to force me back onto my ass. Normally, I enjoy the sensation of falling, but now it has me reaching out in attempts to grab some invisible hand rail. My torso has become almost parallel with the floor and I’m expecting my face to crash onto the wooden planks.

“Hey, you’re almost there!” shouts Dash as encouragement.

I’m starting to lean too far forward and I’m likely to reach my tipping point at any moment. Twirling my arms in circles in order to find my balance, I wobble to and fro on the balls of my feet. Finally, my body remembers its center of gravity and I achieve a state of equilibrium. Cautiously, I straighten out to my full height.

“Yes!” Rainbow bellows.

I wait a second just to make sure my legs won’t give out.

Letting out a sigh of relief, I immediately put on a shit-eating grin.

“See? Piece of cake.”

“Pfft… Please, I’ve seen Granny Smith do a push up faster than that,” teases Rainbow, but I don’t care.

I’m freakin' standing! YES! Achievement unlocked: Defying Gravity! Wait! Maintain aloof expression… good? Good.

“Well, I don’t mean to brag or anything,” I begin, folding my arms. “But, I’ve been known to even conquer one or two flights of stairs in my time,” I finish, brushing imaginary dust from my shoulder.

“Woah! Look out everypony! We’ve got ourselves a badass here!” Rainbow announces, playing along.

I move to strike a victory pose. Bad idea…

My leg buckles from the sudden change in position and my already questionable balance is lost completely.

“Wah!”

I stumble forward, crash into Rainbow and we both go down.

Oh… what am I going to tell him?

Thou must tell the human the truth… that he will never be able to return home.

I don’t know that for sure!

Thou hast written many a letter to Celestia discussing this matter. Even the great Sun Alicorn has no answer for this phenomenon.

Yes, but… but there’s always an answer!

Perchance this time… none exists…

Aren’t you supposed to be my advisor? Instead, all you do is tell me things I don’t wanna hear!

Indeed we are thou counsel, and as such, our duty requires us to place thou thoughts into perspective.

Well… whatever you’re doing it’s not helping!

Dear Twilight… thou hast yet to decide what thou will tell the human.

…I know…

I sigh as I trot down the hospital hallway towards Rainbow’s and Anthony’s ward. The doctor and nurse pony step politely to the side and bow as I stride past.

That’s still pretty weird…

A princess must become accustomed to being admired by her subjects.

Yeah, but it’s still weird.

As I reach the door of the ward I inhale and move my hoof towards my chest. I slowly release the breath, feeling some of the stress leave my body with it. But not all of it.

I don’t know if I can do this…

Please allow us to aid thou in disclosing this troubling information to the human, Princess.

That would be much appreciated, thanks.

I feel my body go limp for a second until my muscles once again tense up except this time not by my own will. My consciousness has now taken a back seat to the presence that now permeated every inch of my body. My wings spread to their full length and my legs straighten out so I stand at my full height. The expression on my face is no longer my own; it exudes confidence and power.

A magical aura surrounds the door knob and the wooden door swings open to reveal…

Wait. What!?

Calm down, Princess. There is most likely a satisfactory explanation for this.

The scene before me contains two beings; one a pony and the other, a human. On the floor lie Rainbow Dash and Anthony. Anthony is currently straddling Rainbow Dash while she lays spread-eagle on her back. Their faces are no more than a few inches from each other. What’s more, there is some white liquid covering Rainbow’s stomach.

Well, I certainly can’t think of one at the moment!

“Ohh… oww,” I groan, looking down to make sure I didn’t mess up my leg even more than it already was. Thankfully, it looks no worse for wear. As I look down I notice a pair of cyan legs underneath my own and suddenly I hear a voice groaning. “Oh! I’m so sorry Rainbow! Your stitches are alright, right?” I ask nervously.

“Owww… Yeah, I’m fine. Y’know next time you should watch where you’re aiming. It would’ve been a lot less messy if you went for the bed,” says Rainbow, with a smirk. She points to the milk on her stomach that had obviously spilled during our spill.

Looking up, I notice that if I had fallen just a little more to the right I would’ve landed softly on Rainbow’s mattress. I chuckle slightly.

“Okay, I promise next time I’m coming at you I’ll aim for the pillows instead.”

We both laugh heartily at the ridiculousness of our fall.

*Ahem*

Both Rainbow and I stop laughing. In unison, we turn towards the door of our room and see none other than Princess Twilight Sparkle standing, mouth agape, at the threshold.

“I’m… sorry if I’m interrupting… you two,” The Princess says slowly.

Hey, she’s not using the ‘royal talk’ again. And what’s with that face? It’s like she’s seen…

My thoughts trail off as my eyes follow the Princess’s to Rainbow’s stomach. When I see the milk that had spilled all over the mare’s belly as well as how I’m bent over top of her, my brain connects the dots.

“Woah! It’s definitely not what it looks like!” I shout at the shocked Princess.

Oh yeah… smooth move genius. Like that’ll totally convince her otherwise…

“Look I… I mean we… I mean… Rainbow, help me out here!” I plead turning towards the Pegasus. Rainbow Dash, however, has now covered her blushing face with her hooves. I quickly face the Princess once again. “I-I was trying to get it up... NO! I mean get up… and I…”

I just so happened to fall on top of Rainbow Dash in this totally provocative position. Yeah… I don’t see that explanation going over so well. C’mon Rainbow! I really need some backup right about n…

*whack*

It seems Rainbow has decided she’d suffered enough embarrassment for one day and wants me off her right away. I suppose she must have thought the fastest way to get me to move was to kick me right between the legs. She was right.

I howl in pain and fall to the side while clutching my groin. In the meantime, Rainbow has gotten to her hooves and her face has returned to its normal blue hue. She walks over to the Princess while wiping some of the milk from her stomach.

“It’s just milk, Twilight. Y’know from breakfast,” she explains then points back to me still writhing in pain on the floor. “This doofus was trying to stand up, but ended up falling and taking me along for the ride. Honestly, he’s about as graceful as Derpy,” she finishes, rolling her eyes to exaggerate my stupidity.

The Princess shakes her head and her expression becomes calm and composed once more. It seems as if she’s found Rainbow’s explanation more believable than my own.

“We understand,” says the Princess, once again using the royal ‘we.’ She turns to face me still lying on my side on the floor and asks, “Will thou be well? That kick looked most painful…”

“Oh… Don’t worry ‘bout me. I’ll be… just fine,” I answer, shooting Rainbow a dirty look.

Honestly, if girls understood how bad this hurts they wouldn’t be so ‘quick to kick.’

“We do hope thou will be more cautious when attempting such a stunt in the future,” comments the Princess.

“Will do, your Majesty,” I say through gritted teeth while bringing my hand to my forehead in a mock salute; my other hand was making sure that my left nut had come back down from my esophagus.

“And we also hope that thou will not be so hasty to injure our guest further, loyal Rainbow,” adds the Princess.

I manage to crawl over to my bed and clamber up onto the soft mattress. My balls are still throbbing, but peak of the pain has subsided.

“Yeah, sure whatever,” replies Rainbow as she walks back over to her own bed. She doesn’t even bother to look at the Princess.

Jeez… I know you’re supposedly good friends with her, but you don’t have to be rude. I wonder what’s going on between those two anyway. Whenever they’re in the same room together Rainbow gets all bitchy. Well… whatever… I’m sure they’ll work it out themselves.

“So, Princess?” I begin. The lavender Alicorn turns to face me once more. “What brings you here anyway? Do you have more questions for me or is this just a visit or… or… Wait! Have you found a way to send me back home!?”

Out of the corner of my eye I notice Rainbow’s ears perk up at that last suggestion. The Princess takes a step towards me.

“We do indeed have news concerning your return home,” she says. For the smallest moment I notice the Princess’s countenance waver ever so slightly. “That is the reason we have graced thou with our presence today.”

That look… Why do I feel like I’m gonna get a second shot to the groin today?

Author's Note

Sorry about the long wait everypony, but here it is! Chapter 7! Hoped you enjoyed it and didn't facehoof yourselves too badly at my lame attempt at comedy. Next chapter will be out soon... well eventually... well... IT'LL BE OUT WHEN IT'S OUT!