When outcast by modern human society, an angered Jared Milton stumbled into a portal leading to Equestria. After accidently arriving, he decides to spread his 'SWAG' (Super Weirdly Agressive Gangrene, which only reacts to ponies) and repulsive larva level intelligence views. The new ponified Jared will lead Equestria in a new age of ignorance and depression with an army of clones. To clarify: he's the main antagonist.

With Celestia and Luna doing a clopfic in the overused Griffon Kingdom, it's up to the anarchist community of B0NER to stop this fiend of stupidity and fuglyness. With a transvestite stripper Sombra, a polished brick, and the lavender brew of unstoppable goo, nothing can go wrong.

Soon the tyranny of the Royal Pony Sisters will come to an end. For very soon, Equestria will go to war with the most unlikely of foes, and the worst of puns. Prepare your virgins, the fic of the century is coming. Oh yes, dear reader, batten down the hatches, prepare your buttocks, and spread the proclamation, for after all, Jared Milton dies at the end of this.....

WaRnInG~!
This story contains graphic material such as:
Jared Milton,
Stallions in speedos,
Smooze,
Chaos,
Jared Milton,
Sex and alcoholic references,
Internet slang,
Jared Milton,
Logic,
Jared Milton,
Humor--Jared Milton,
Jared--Jar--Milton,
Ja--jared--milt--jared--miljar--

Balls to Stygian359 for editing. And check out the amazing reading done by Weird Alicorn on his youtube channel here (i would put the video because it's youtube buuuuut no videos or images in story descriptions remember :/)

What people have said about 'JMDATENTTOFASSOTROBOBOTBFEWOASASFAMBTHHSAOEOICBIWTO':

"Actually i though it was quiet funny Bueno." ~mist vale

"....I think I'm too confused to be offended..." ~Scarheart76

"I enjoy breathing, and I've already laughed myself half to death just from the description, so I'm not going to read this. Have a like anyways

Pardon me while I suffocate " ~StLeibowitz

"Tip of Spike's pimp hat to you, sir." ~Adorned ungulate

"Sombra has just been reduced to absolutely nothing; this is hilarious. *laughs* I have the biggest smile on my face as I'm reading this guys." ~Weird Alicorn

"I couldn't resist snorting when I saw the mature tag." ~CM12

" I CAN'T WAIT TO FuCKING RevIeW THIS!!
I JUST REAd ThE FrEAKiN TITLE AND DeSCRipT AND I WaS AlReaDy DiEiNG of LauGhter. LOL. Can't wait. lol" ~Aruzo Night

"FOR THE GLORY OF B0NER!!!" ~Stygian359

[img]http://oi57.tinypic.com/2r2n0wi.jpg[/img]