Making Ponies Happy

“Remember what I told you. No pranks. No tricks. You are going to apologize and do exactly as she says.” Fluttershy’s eyes bore into Discord’s sternly as the two of them entered a store modeled after a gingerbread house. This store went by the name Sugarcube Corner, and was known for its status as the premier party capitol of Ponyville, and living pad of Pinkie Pie.

“Hiya Fluttershy!” a merry smile lit up from behind the counter of the store, attached to the joyous pink pony that it belonged to. The smile dimmed somewhat at the sight of the towering figure standing next to Fluttershy, but revved back up to full blast a split second later. “And Discord too! What’s up?”

“Hello Pinkie Pie” Fluttershy’s dulcet voice flowed out powerfully, letting everypony know that Assertive Fluttershy was speaking. “Discord has something he would like to say to you.”

“Hello Pinkie Pie,” began Discord. “I’m sorry for what I did to you this morning. It was very cruel and unfluttershy. If it makes you feel better, I volunteered to help you this week to make things up to you. Since the Cakes are out for the weekend and I’m supposed to be learning friendship, reasons reasons friendship blah blah, so I’m your slave for this week.” He snapped his paw and a maid outfit similar to those found in the country of Fancy appeared on Discord.

Pinkie Pie raised her eyebrows in surprise. “You told Fluttershy about what you did?”

Discord nodded. “Well, with the exception of Flutters here, you are my favorite element. I would hate to drive you away because of a joke gone wrong. And if anyone knows about forgiveness, it’s Fluttershy.”

Pinkie Pie’s eyes softened. “Aww, that’s so sweet! But I already forgave you. I know reforming is difficult. Even Luna made a scene the first time she came to Ponyville after she reformed.”

“But he still needs to make up for it. That’s why Discord has volunteered to help around Sugarcube Corner this week” Fluttershy put her two bits in, smiling contentedly at such a peaceful resolution to the conflict.

“I’ll have you know, I’m a snap hand at baking!” Discord snapped his lion paw' digits together, and an oven appeared around Discord. The temperature dial climbed from zero to a sign labeled with skull and crossbones. Discord slumped over in the oven, and held up his lion’s paw to the oven’s door. Pushing it open, Discord’s paw disconnected from his arm and promptly proceeded to pull a cake out from behind Discord, and set it on a nearby table.

Retracting his paw, Discord closed the oven door while still inside of it and then took a bow. To Pinkie Pie and Fluttershy’s further astonishment, Discord began to melt into hot chocolate in front of their eyes. As Discord melted in the oven, a put upon expression appeared on his face, and he snapped his not-yet-melted griffin claws.

With a poof, the oven disappeared, and with it Discord. Before either pony could comment on what they had seen, he reappeared in a chef’s hat with an outrageous mustache that would have made Gustave le Grand weep in envy if he had been there to see it. Whipping out what appeared to be two massive barrels, he attached a nozzle to each and hooked them to his back. Hovering over the cake that he had produced, he pulled the trigger on each nozzle. With surprising care and precision, he aimed twin jets of melted chocolate and whipped cream at the cake.

Pinkie and Fluttershy looked curiously at the cake. It stood roughly 2 meters tall and one meter in diameter. A crumbly crust surrounded its bottom and lower sides. Flecks of pink were interwoven in its otherwise milky white filling.

As Discord worked, Pinkie Pie cautiously began to approach the cake. Taking a sniff, she detected a mouthwatering aroma coming from the cake. Completely unable to resist the call of the sugar rush, Pinkie Pie unhinged her jaw and knelt down. She narrowed her eyes at her prey and moved silently at an angle to it, making sure to walk as quickly as she could without alerting it to her presence. In the far off distance, she could hear the echo of a worried voice calling out “Pinkie Pie? What are you doing? Where did you get that suit?” The Guardian of The Prey stood before her, blocking her path. “Tada!” cried The Guardian, stepping out of her way. Serendipitously surprised by the surrender, Pinkieus Pieicus pounced at her prey.

Pinkie Pie awoke to Discord’s smug grin and Fluttershy’s worried face looking up at her through a mountain of discarded cake and frosting. Absentmindedly, Pinkie Pie extended her tongue and licked the frosting off of her face. As she licked the frosting off of the rest of her body, she discovered that, somewhere in her feeding frenzy, she had put of a tiger striped latex ninja suit.

“Well I think the results speak for themselves” Discord said smugly.

Fluttershy mumbled incoherently, wringing her hooves. After breathing in deep calming gasps, Fluttershy finally asked “So, how was it?”

Blinking, Pinkie replied “It was great!”

Discord beamed at her and turned to Fluttershy. “See? I told you I could handle it!”

Fluttershy nodded, and replied “Ok. Just try not to scare off the customers next time. I’m going to tell the ponies hiding behind the door that it’s safe to come in now. Please don’t make me a liar Discord.”

After Fluttershy exited, Pinkie Pie turned to Discord. “Discord.”

Discord turned to Pinkie Pie. “Yes, Pinkie?”

Pinkie Pie cocked her head and one of her eyebrows lifted. “Why did you bake Smooze into that cake?”

Discord’s expression flitted from guilty to confused to intrigued. “How-” he paused, before shaking his head. “It used to be a… well known recipe. It’s irresistible, you know.”

Pinkie Pie’s eyebrows furrowed. “Don’t add Smooze to any more cakes please.”

Discord cocked his head, a neutral expression on his face. “Okie dokie lokie.”

Pinkie Pie stuck her tongue out. “That’s my catchphrase!”

The door opened. “Um” Fluttershy squeaked, before hiding behind her mane.

Pinkie Pie grinned at Fluttershy. “Don’t worry. You go on home. I’ll talk to the big scary crowd.”

“Thank you” mumbled Fluttershy, before bolting out.

“Oh, that Fluttershy” Pinkie Pie shook her head, before poking her head out the door. “Don’t worry ponies! Discord’s just here to help me bake! Wait! Where are you going? Come back!”