My Little Raptor

When I woke up after passing out from Terry saying there was a marine reptile from the Dinosaur era. I looked around to see I was on a train. I then saw Z, M, and F, in front of me, sleeping. Everyone in the car was talking or playing a game. I said the only thing I could say at the moment.

"I like trains." I said, catching Noah's attention.

"Hey, fat ass, how do you weight so much? Even me carrying you with F didn't seem like you were light either." Noah asked, looking at me.

"I'm doing fine, thanks for asking. Oh, and fuck you too." I said the first part sarcastically, then added the last part quickly. "And I'm not fat, I'm a dinosaur you fucktard." I growled out, glaring at him.

Wait, how is he fitting in this train car? You know what, I'm friends with Pinkie, so fuck logic, I'll just go along with the ride.

My talking caught the other's attention, and they surrounded me, asking questions. Except for the three, horny raptors in front of me.

"I swear to God, if you do not shut up I will eat your children!" I threatened, making them quiet. I sighed, rubbing my eyes with my claws. "Alright, one at a time. You, Flutters."

Flutters hid behind her mane, then mumbled something. "I was wondering, how did you get that gash?"

I looked at the scar on my leg. "Megaraptor attack." I said simply. Twilight was writing down notes. I grabbed what she was writing, and squinted.

She was writing...What I just said. I raised a eyebrow, and raised my large toe claw. I then swiped it against the paper, cutting it in half. "Write that down." I said, but the picked up the paper I slashed, nodding to herself.

"Now, you dumbass." I pointed at Noah, who chuckled.

"Why are do these three keep on asking about you're 'special somepony'?" He said, looking down at AB, Sweetie Belle, and Scoots.

"You're too young to understand it, so don't ask. It involves the birds and the bees though." I said, shrugging.

I saw AB turn, then look a AJ. "What's tha birds and tha bees?" AB asked AJ, causing the mare to blush.

"Ah'll tell ya tomorrow. And, Dart."

"Si?" I asked, looking at her. Si means yes in Spanish.

"Why are ya usin' bad words aroun' us?" She asked, looking at me with serious eyes.

"Shit, ass, bitch, crap, bastard, fucktard, cock." I said, making her growl at me. "I use bad words because I can't punch Noah...or Cutter." I said, shrugging. By now, that white mare, Rarity, fainted.

By now, Z woke up, and noticed the others talking to me, but she didn't see me. She looked around, but I pretended to sleep, making her go back to sleep. Hearing her snoring, I lifted my head, then looked at the others.

"Alright, now you, Gay pride." I said, pointing to RD, who growled at me.

"Why did we bring you?" RD asked, making me raise my scaled brow.

"Not only was I the first dinosaur here, but I'm better at talking than these three right here, and lard ass over there. I'm a people person." I then noticed Noah about to eat some cake. "Hey, fucker! You touch my cake and I will cut you!" He slowly backed away from the cake.

I then looked at the others. "Yes, Twilight."

"Why do you threaten people all the time?" She asked, raising another feather and paper.

"First, where the Hell do you get all of that? Second, Noah, I said if you try to touch my cake, I will cut you!" I said, glaring at him, making him back away, giving up on the cake. "Third, I threaten people because I can. If Spike touched the books under your bed, would you let him?"

She suddenly blushed, making me frown. "By the way Twilight, shame on you! What if Spike found those and decided to read them?"

Spike lifted his head, and looked at me. "What?"

"Listen, Twilight, you better hide those books." I said quickly, but smiled at him. "Nothing concerning you, pipsqueak." I then ruffled his spikes.

I then looked out the window, and noticed a castle coming up. "Twilight, why does the castle show a bunch of guards aiming their crossbows at us?" I asked, then, an arrow whizzed by my head, hitting the seat I was sitting on.

I looked out the window again to see the same guard, but this time, he was shaking, ready another arrow, while the other guards yelled at him. He aimed at me, but I quickly ducked, avoiding a arrow.

"Son of a bitch!" I said, seeing a arrow miss my head a couple of centimeters.

Suddenly, the train entered the city, and stopped. A shit ton of guards stood right in front of the door, readying their weapons. One came in, and saw me.

"Would you mind maybe not TRYING TO FUCKING KILL ME!" I yelled at him, growling. He then noticed the others in the car, and shuffled out.

Noah and me stuck our head out the door, and growled. "Which one of you bitches ordered to take off my head!" I asked. Man, I'm fucking pissed. Whoever told them to shoot me is either a dumbass or a coward. Either way, I'm going to kick their ass.

"That would be me!" A voice shouted, guards moving out of the way, Noah's head going back inside...Wonder why. A stallion stood in front of me. I came out of the door, and snarled at him. Of course, I was a few inches taller than him.

"And why the Hell would you do that?" I asked, anger clearly in my voice. He either didn't notice, like a fucktard, or didn't care.

"Because, the Griffon Empire wanted us to take you down! You imprisoned one of their hunters for no reason whatsoever." The stallion growled out.

I lifted my killing claws, showing them off. "Well, she only fired a weapon in a public place, tried to kill me, called me a dumbass, insulted dragons, insulted ponies, and tried to kill my pack. Now tell me, you know you attacked a friend of Twilight Sparkle, right?"

"Twiliy?" The guard asked. I noticed he was probably the captain of something, because he didn't look like the rest of these Stormtroopers! "As in, my sister?"

I looked over to the train car, and whistled. Noah popped his head out, then looked at me quizzically. I gave him a few growls and throaty calls, which made him nod, then go back inside. "She'll be out." I said, then, Twilight came out, then hugged the stallion.

"It's good to see you, Shining Armor." Twilight said, releasing the hug. Pffftt...Shining Armor. I swear to God, if he puts on armor that's shining in combat, and win, I'm going to shit myself laughing. "Still doesn't excuse you for trying to hurt Dart."

"Well how was I supposed to know he was good?" He asked, looking hurt.

"Could've asked. That always works." I offered, making him blush. I then kicked the train car, making the three stooges-I mean raptors file out. "This is Z, M, and F. And F, stop looking at me like that! And here comes Noah."

Noah attempted to go through the door, but failed. "A little help might be needed." He said, smiling, embarrassed. I sighed, then walked over to him.

I started to pull on his horns. "Hell! You weight over a ton, yet you expect me to lift you out of here? You must be bat shit insane!" I said through a struggled breath. I then pulled him out, but rolled out of the way when he landed next to me.

"So, where's this, Celestia?" I asked, looking at Captain America...Captain Armor.