Java Pony

((You are anon))

You wake to the sound of your preset phone alarm going off

You wish you could have remembered to turn that off

You feel amazing

Then, you remember what happened last night.

Did that really happen?

You roll over in bed to see Jackie sleeping soundly next to you, her adorable mane in a mess

Well, it is confirmed, you are not dreaming

This is real

You just fucked a pastel pony

Every horsefucker’s dream

The bed is stained

You should probably clean that up

You start trying to carefully remove the sheets from underneath her

Damnit, it isn’t going to move without her flipping over

Fuck this

You rip the sheets off as fast as you can hoping that you can do that trick where everything just stays

Nope

You send jackie wailing to the floor with the high-speed sheet removal

Oh shit

You peek over the edge of the bed

Jackie’s eyes are flashing, that usual blue

“JACKIE ARE YOU OKAY?”

She just lays there with her eyes open and flashing

“Jackie?!”

“Shut up Anon, I just started improperly. Now what the hell was that for?”

“Uh, I’m just gonna clean the sheets.”

“Oh yeah, that was good last night.”

You both just stare at each other for a while, the sheets still in your grip

“Can I sniff those sheets before you wash them?”

“Uhm, No??”

You tug the end of the sheets away from her

“Aw.”

“No, Jackie, That’s just weird.”

“Fine.”

You open up a closet next to your room that revealed a small washer-dryer stack

You stuff the sheets in the machine and turn around

Jackie is sitting right behind you, looking up at you with those cute big blue eyes

“Do you need something?”

“Coffee.”

“Oh yeah...”

Since everything that happened the night before was so unexpected, you forgot to set the coffee maker

“I’ll start some.”

“Thank you Anon.”

You walk into the kitchen, grab a coffee filter and stop and just mull over everything

Jackie had followed you into the kitchen

She was now staring at you intently

“Anon? Coffee?” She said, sounding a tad bit confused and impatient

“Uh, yeah, sorry.”

You load the water into the machine and just stare at Jackie

“You know something, I think we’ll live a good life together.” You say to her.

“As long as you give me coffee and keep up the performance like last night, I’m sure everything will be perfect, Anon.”

You smile at that

You are probably the only person in the world with a live, intelligent, computer pony

It’s still morning

It’s a weekend

You were thinking about doing some gaming then you remembered what happened

Sheesh, it’s become such a habit you can’t even remember it’s gone

“Anon, can I have some cereal?”

“Sure, Just a second”

You open a cupboard below the coffee maker and pull out the box of Corn Pops

It barely has anything in it

You grab a bowl for Jackie and tip the box, unloading the last eight or so pieces of cereal

She scrunches her nose and looks at you, confused

Damn you’re cheap

“Okay, okay, I will go get some more. I need to go shopping anyway”

Jackie smiles, and rubs her face into your pant leg

Holy shit D’awww

You wonder if she would like to go as well

“You can come with me this time if you want.”

“I can? Ohmigosh I can’t wait! Thank you Anon!” She said as her bright blue eyes lit up

You were watching what she was doing through those big eyes

She was coding herself, and downloading content

“Whatcha doing there, Jackie?”

“Learning”

You laugh and leave the room to grab your phone, your wallet, and your keys

You walk to the apartment door to see Jackie already eagerly pressing up against it

You open the door, let Jackie out, shut it, and lock it

“Alright Jackie, try not to be too apparent.”

“Okay.”

She stops walking for a moment and just freezes

“Jackie, let’s not take things to extremes… Jackie?”

You look at her eyes and see that she is downloading something

“All done! Now I won’t be apparent at all!” She said as her whole body began to disappear in a square pattern.

“Ta dah!” The now invisible pony yelled

“Creepy…”

She then started panting… odd

“Hah- Okay maybe… this wasn’t such a… good idea.”

She became visible again

“I might need to close some open variables.”

“Okay then.”

“But I know one other thing that will make me less apparent!”

“Oh really?”

“Yep! Zippy time!”

It didn’t hit you right away, but then it was apparent what she meant

Jackie rapidly shrunk into a pony many, many times smaller, and landed on the ground with a small ‘thud’

You bend over and gently pick her up

She is about the size of a computer mouse

“Now I’m a zip file!” She said in a tiny, squeaky voice

“You are full of little surprises, Jackie.”