Day 5 - Guy Newman - Integrated Sciences, Gen Ed Class

Let me tell you a thing or two about science. It's all one great big lie. In high school, I learned that the only way to solve Physics is to disregard the Laws of Physics. I have legitimately made up data and gotten problems correct. I never learned very much in chemistry, either. You put some elements together, if they're stable you're good, and if not they may go boom. Yeah, I passed high school with about that understanding level. And this is why I was going into programming. I couldn't science for my life, but I can math just fine. Needless to say, I was not enjoying myself in Integrated Sciences Class. The teacher had gone into a brief description of the course, then launched himself right into the content. First class of the year. It was probably better that way; it was hard enough to listen to him droning on and on about the content. I didn't even think about how much my head would hurt if he were talking about stuff that wouldn't be on a test.

Richard was in the row in front of me, pretending to take notes on his laptop, when he was really just messing around on Facebook. The guy next to him was playing was playing Minecraft, not really even pretending to pay attention (The teacher actually called on the guy once; he got the question right). And let's face it, I would have been doing something like that if I had my laptop on me, but I had left it at the dorm for that exact reason. Neither Pinkie nor Rainbow were in this class, and I didn't see most of the others, though Twilight was in the front row, studiously hanging on every word the professor said, and correcting him on any mistakes he made.

"Professor, Inertia isn't a force." "Professor, there's no such thing as centrifical force." And other such remarks. He was very confused when Twilight tried to explain inertia through a visual of satellites. Richard chuckled every time the professor was corrected, and I could tell he was enjoying it. In the professor's defense, he was primarily a chemistry teacher; he didn't know physics very well. But still, it made you curious just how difficult it really was to get a job as a professor. I'm actually pretty sure Twilight was the only one in the room actually paying attention. Damn could this professor talk. Time seemed to lag by, especially since I was much more concerned with meeting Richard and Scott afterwards than the class itself. Speaking of Scott, where the heck was h-

"Nobody panic, I have arrived!" Came a shout as the door slammed shut. Scott had just made it to class. There were a few muffled giggles and snickers throughout the classroom, but the teacher was so absorbed in his lecture that he actually managed to miss Scott's obnoxious entrance. Holy shit, I wish I had that kind of luck. Scott just looked around and found an empty seat. The seat on my right.

"Hey, Guy." He said, sitting down. "How's it hangin'?" I shrugged in response.

"Where have you been?" I asked. "You're a half-hour late."

"Painting a car, and repairing a bumper." I gave him a blank stare. "So... It turns out that Applejack can't drive." I blinked a few times. He shrugged. All right. Don't let Scott come up with ideas; note taken. And the teacher still hadn't noticed anything. Even though I had tried to pay attention, Scott being next to me ruined any chances of it happening. I had tried. I really did. But everything the teacher said for the rest of the hour went through one ear and out the other. Finally, the man stopped talking, and class was about to end when Richard went and blurted out in a very :

"Professor, satellites have inertia." He was the physics major, but he probably should have just let the class end. Now the teacher was pretty pissed at him. There was no response directly, but I got the feeling Richard was gonna be a target for the rest of the year. But how he did respond was:

"Well, Mr Dickinsun, you already have a meeting with the principal today. Lucky you." He turned away from him and towards me. "You as well, Mr Newman and Mr Scottson."

I guess Celestia wanted to see us today. The three of us grouped up at the bottom of the room by the board as everyone else went out the door.

"Mornin', Richard." I said, since I had already been talking with Scott.

"Hey, guys. Have a good weekend?" He asked. Scott and I looked at each other.

"Umm... Sure. It was... oh fuck, it was awful. Applejack crashed my car into a nursing home."

"Pinkie got assaulted in an alley."

"Oh... well... Okay then." Was Richard's reply. "Well, now I feel kind of bad, but I had a great weekend. Fluttershy and I went out shopping, and I found this great game that we can all play some day."

"Yeah, yeah, that's great." I said, not really wanting to talk about the past at the moment. "But we should really just see what Celestia wants."

"Oh. Okay, I guess." Richard seemed a little disappointed that I wasn't into it. I was thrilled he wanted us to try and get along and all, but I just didn't feel like it after having to think about the weekend. So we made our way back to the principal's office. Neither Richard nor I said much. I think Richard was still feeling bad for our disaster of a week. Scott, on the other hand, was being as obnoxious as usual, shouting down the halls for no real reason as we walked. Once again, we arrived to find the principal's office empty. I decided it was time for us to talk a little.

"So, aside from the weekend, how's everything been going?" I asked, curious how the others had been adjusting to the situation.

"Well," Scott started, "I've been fucked in more ways then I care to count, physically and emotionally. The RA walked in on us, and I'm really getting annoyed of this whole thing." So Scott wasn't having much fun.

"You too, huh? Twilight walked in on Pinkie naked on the couch, yelled at us, then ran out. Anyway, how about you, Richard?" He was busy laughing.

"Ahahahaha... Sorry. Now I know why Twilight was so pissed when she walked in on me and Flutters. Anyway, things have been going great. Fluttershy and I are officially a couple; Twilight's still a little pissed, but she's bitchy about everything, so fuck her." Well, now I was a little jealous. Everything was going great for him while Scott and I were both having relationship issues. I was falling for both of mine, Scott was running away from both of his. But I wasn't going to let that show.

"Well, that's good. They're still a little ridiculous though." I said to lighten my mood. "I had to teach Pinkie how to use a towel."

"Haha, yeah. I had to teach Fluttershy what a bra was."

"I'm never teaching them anything again." Scott said in a huffy voice, crossing his arms.

"What exactly happened?" I asked. Scott sighed, and went on to explain how he had taken Applejack out to teach her how to drive just to get her out of the dorm. "We crashed. A lot. Into a fire hydrant, then an old lady, then a nursing home." Okay, well at least Pinkie and I hadn't broke any laws. And then Principal Celestia finally showed up.

"Good afternoon, students." She addressed us each, nodding at us one by one. "I trust you all have been getting used to your new lives?" We all glanced at each other, in silent agreement.

"Yeah, everything's been going great." Richard was the one who spoke. Scott and I just nodded.

"Very good. Now then, I've gathered you here to give you the details of your project. The University is able to supply you with whatever materials you may need, to an extent-"

"By any chance can you get me some more Vodka?" Scott blurted out.

"Well, that's not... Wait, what do you mean by more?" The principal replied.

"Um, nothing. Carry on." And now the principal was wary of Scott.

"Anyway, I've already told you that the three of you will be making a teleporter, and that you have time to complete this project. But the where and the how I have not yet told you."

"Before we get into that, I have a question!" Richard put in.

"Yes?"

"None of my teachers seem to like me. Can we get new ones?"

"I'm afraid I can't do something like that. It would draw too much suspicion, and we can't afford extra attention." Richard looked disappointed, but said nothing else, so she continued. "As you know, we are trying to attract as little attention as possible. Therefore, there will be a special room set aside that requires administrative pass codes to get in. The only people who will know this code are you three, myself, my dean, and your six friends; my six students." Okay, could be worse. We got our own room to work in. But...

"Now, what about the how?" Richard voiced my question. Scott was just sitting in his chair on his phone again.

"The how is quite complicated. In our world, we would simply be able to use magic to create a portal. However, magic does not exist in the same form in this world. However, there is a chance we will be able to create a machine that will mimic the wave-length and form, and thus be able to open into Equestria. This is just one possibility, but it is our best lead right now. As such, Twilight will be working with you frequently due to her understanding of magic."

Scott had stopped paying attention, but Richard didn't seem very happy at the mention of Twilight. No idea what was going on between them, but it wasn't my problem at the moment. The more pressing issue was:

"Okay, so why exactly do you think we can do this?" I asked.

"I've told you before that you are the brightest students in your class. But you really do have the potential to surpass the higher level students. Additionally, we simply wanted people in the same age range to be our partners. People we believed we could trust. We initially had just planned on telling you it was a project for the school's science fair, but you figured out the truth on your own." Not really satisfactory, but I wasn't going to get much more from her, so I changed the subject.

"That actually reminds me... Where exactly did everyone stay before college started?" Celestia looked at me like she didn't want to answer, so I added, "It will help us understand them better, which means we can teach them better." She sighed, but I had won the battle.

"Very well. Let's just start with Pinkie Pie then." She began the story. "I'll admit, this isn't my first visit to this world; but it is the first in which the portal refuses to return us back. We have yet to figure out why, which is part of the reason you were recruited. So with not much of a choice, I re-assumed my job here as principal. With that done, I found places for each of my subjects to live without attracting too much attention. Pinkie Pie was the hardest for that, but I eventually found a small bakery where she was able to work, and a nearby apartment. It wasn't much of a place to live by human standards, but she couldn't bear the thought of staying here for a month without classes or many other people, so that's what we set up for her. She lived alone in the apartment, so she still needs more information than some of the others."

Well, that explained a lot.

"Next, we have Fluttershy. She lived with a group of hippies...she doesn't really talk much about it. She didn't much enjoy the fact that they didn't bathe...and she said it always smelled really weird. So recreational drug use was possible."

Ummm, okay then. Sounded like Fluttershy had found the really weird side of humanity. Then again, I guess everyone is weird in their own way.

"Rarity started out working at a clothes store, but she was upset that she couldn't design anything and quickly grew bored of the job. She, by far, ended up best off from her work, but I'd rather not say how she chose to earn her money. She earned so much that she moved into a suite at a time share for two weeks rather than stay at the apartment we had found."

Scott obviously had a guess or two at what the career had been. Unfortunately, from all I had heard from him, I did too. But I didn't like to judge. As long as she made great tips, who really cared?

"Applejack was simple enough to provide for. She worked on a farm, where she was also able to stay. Mostly, her labor just resulted in a place to sleep and food on the table, but the family she was staying with was so impressed with her work that she was given a good sum to buy anything she needed for here."

"Rainbow Dash... actually slipped out from under my radar. Weather patrol doesn't exist here, so it was difficult to find her a job with her now-limited skill-set. I left her an apartment, like the rest, but she only used it on the first day. I was searching for some career for her, but I didn't get back in contact with her until she came here, so if you want to know, you'll have to ask her about it."

Well, that would be hard with her not talking to me.

"And finally, my faithful student Twilight hasn't left my side. She chose to begin her studies early and reside on campus the entire time. She's already put some thought into the project (Richard nodded to himself at that) but hasn't managed to get very far due to her incomplete understanding of this world. Unfortunately, she can't get passed the fact that the kind of magic she's used to isn't present here. That's one of the things I want you to help her with, Richard." She said, clearly implying that the q and a was at an end and trying to get this back on track.

"Already been trying. It's gonna take some work, though." Was his reply. Celestia nodded, then stood up.

"Well, if that's all, I believe it's time I show you all your work space." We silently got up and and followed her as she lead us out of the office and towards the elevator. The system worked by entering the floor you wanted to go to, then scanning your student I.D. It was a technology school, after all, so why not? We watched as Celestia entered the number for the seventh floor, and scanned her badge.

"The floor we're going to requires a faculty badge to get to under most conditions, but the system has been programmed to accept your nine I.D.s as well. The room we are going to also requires I.D., but as I said, it will only accept yours, mine, and the Dean's." She explained as the elevator took us down.

When the door opened, we were let out into a bright hallway, with several doors on either side. But all of them were open, so they weren't the one's we were looking for. But the room we entered was the very last room on the right side, which had been open. No one was in it, and the room was mostly empty. It wasn't even that big. In fact, it looked more like a large closet than a room.

"Umm..." I started, but Celestia continued to walk. It was then that I noticed the door in the back. It was the exact same color as the rest of the room, and barely noticeable. If you weren't looking for it, you were probably going to miss it. There was no handle, just a hole big enough for about two fingers. Our principal put her finger in and pulled it aside to reveal another short hallway. We all went into it, Celestia closing the door behind us. This hallway was much dimmer, but it was just bright enough to see that this door was made of a very tough metal, and had no obvious way to open in. Celestia moved forward, and we noticed the card scanner on the wall. She directed us to attempt it one at a time to confirm that our I.D.s worked. Scott scanned his the wrong way the first time, but otherwise they worked fine. With that door now closed, we found another one. Jeez, this was getting old fast. This one actually looked even sturdier than the one before it, and this time there was a key pad rather than a card scanner on the wall.

Celestia looked around, just to make sure, I guess, then told us the pass code.

"Now remember, we're keeping this project as quiet as possible. You can't tell anyone about this. Now the password: FIMFIC."

"Fimfic?" I questioned.

"Friendship Intensified Magically Fortified Inter-dimensional Construct."

"So this is like the fucking TARDIS?" Richard asked, but Celestia just stared at him blankly. "Sorry, never mind."

"Anyway, just enter the password and take a look for yourselves. Spend as much time as you want; this will be your work room. That's all I need you for today. Best of luck, and continue to fill me in on your progress." And with that, she left us to check out our work space. None of us made a move, so I sighed and went to the key pad on the wall.

"F-I-M-F-I-C" I spelled to myself as I put in the code. When I entered the last letter, I pressed the "done" button at the bottom and heard a hissing sound as the the lock popped upon. Richard stepped forward to find a handle, but the door slid open on its own. Woo, high-tech! So all that was left was to step inside.

The first thing I noticed was the size. This was a pretty big room. Probably about the size of an entire dorm if there were no walls, and maybe even a little bigger. Across the floor in the center ran a table in the shape of a 'U,' with eleven chairs positioned around it. Along the walls were a massive number of cabinets, each with a different label. Some such were 'spare parts,' 'chargers,' 'data chips,' and so forth. Just about anything you could imagine needing for building a fancy machine, although we would need that imagination to actually do it. Below the cabinets ran counters, across which was more stuff, and some more daily things like a sink and a microwave. Scott was the first one to notice the refrigerator, and ran over to it, pulling the door open. After a quick look around, he let out a sigh.

"Problem?" I asked.

"No Vodka." He moaned. Richard couldn't help but laugh at him, but I couldn't tell whether it was a pity laugh or a taunt. "Just soda."

In the center of the room was a mess of a machine that looked like it had been taken apart and thrown back together several times. Some of the pieces looked slightly beat up, like someone had gotten angry and tried to break it, but failed. Pieces littered the floor around the machine as well.

"Three guesses who's been here." Richard said.

"Looks like Twilight's been working on this already." I said.

"Who?" Scott asked.

"What?"

"Who's Twilight?"

"Goddammit, Scott!" Richard yelled, as the faker cracked up.

Well, this was going beautifully already. While those two were arguing, I started to look at the machine that Twilight had been playing with. I had absolutely no idea what exactly it was, but it really did look like a lot of work had been put into it. But at the same time, it didn't look like it was anywhere near finished. It was still open at the top with a bunch of wires that weren't actually running anywhere. I looked up over it, and noticed that all the seats had laptops at them, and one of them was already open. I walked over and jiggled the mouse to wake it up. The screen flashed to life, and I got to see a file of the prototype of the machine Twilight had been trying to build. On paper, it looked quite sound, and I could actually follow the design. It would be hard to build, and this prototype was probably flawed, considering she hadn't got it working yet. But it might just be possible. Twilight really did have a solid head on her shoulders. With her on the team, we might just be able to make this work. As I clicked the screen to try and enlarge various parts, I hear a humming behind me. The machine had lit up in a few places, and a light hum was in the air. Another box flashed up on the laptop, and coding started running by. I smiled. She had managed a lot, so now we just had to finish it.

"I didn't know a vagina could smell like that." Scott said. No idea what the hell they had been talking about, but whatever. It was time to play around. I hadn't even known these guys for a week, and here we were about to get into some massive group project.

"Allright guys, shut the fuck up. We're gonna make a FIMFIC!"

Author's Note

SmileandSoar - So, this one's all on me. A little bit of help from teh others, but I volunteered to write the group meetings, so here we go. It would be way to repetitive for us all to take perspective on the same scene, so any group meeting chapters will be much shorter and done (most likely by me).
On that note, you can all thank Tehheliclopter for that lovely pun that is so accurately representative of how our writing started.