Shame and Desire

Twilight took a deep breath and held it. If she was lucky, her pursuer wouldn’t hear her, here, in the closet. It was dark, but she didn’t dare light it, lest her magic be detected.

The mare pursuing her was not her equal.

She was Twilight’s better.

Hoofsteps. “Twiiiiiilight. Come out, come out! Hide and seek is over.” No anger in the mare’s voice, either. She had no need for anger; if Twilight challenged her directly, Twilight would lose. “You know I’ll find you eventually, Twilight.”

The hoofsteps seemed to move away. A door opened, but not the closet door. “Are you in here?”

No, Twilight thought.

A few more minutes and she’d be caught. Why wasn’t she teleporting?

Wait, why aren’t I teleporting?!

It’d buy time. More importantly, it’d put distance between her pursuer and herself.

Twilight fired up her horn, aiming for just outside Ponyville, and triggered just as the door opened.

She opened her eyes. She wasn’t outside Ponyville. She wasn’t even outside the library.

Her pursuer turned from the closet with a smirk. “I set an enchantment to catch your teleportation before I started chasing you. I’m surprised it took you this long, Twilight.”

“No,” she exclaimed, shaking her head. She already felt warm tendrils of magic around her hooves; running wasn’t an option.

Her pursuer approached, the smirk spreading into a wide grin. “Now, Twilight . . . what are you running for? You know you want this.”

A stroke of magic crossed Twilight’s left buttock, and she felt her legs clench, trying to press together. “Try what you will, but I won’t break.”

“Twilight, Twilight, Twilight . . . why must you resist?” Another smirk, and every slow step brought Trixie closer. Her eyelids drooped, and her eyes pursed..

Twilight realized her breathing was faster. The touch on her butt came again, but this time it gripped and squeezed. “Well, if I just gave in, there wouldn’t be the fun of the chase.”

“Mmmmmm . . . and I do so love having to chase you.”

Twilight quivered in the grip of magic, her tail pressing down. She panted and shook her head again with a giggle. “I won’t bend to your seduction! Do what you will!”

“More lies won’t save you from the love of Trixie Lulamoon,” she purred, and her breath was on Twilight’s lips.

The touch behind her split, one grip lifting Twilight’s tail and the other probing deftly at her sex. Twilight’s eyes closed tight as she moaned out, and that sound was stifled by Trixie’s mouth on hers. The touch at her sex shifted, transforming from a slim touch to something wider, wider, and it started nudging at her entrance.

Everything was gone.

Twilight opened her eyes and closed her mouth. “What?”

A thin echo of the word came back to her in the empty library. Then, it echoed again, then again, somehow getting louder on every successive echoing. Twilight covered her ears as it got shrill and strange, almost a beeping.

She started awake to her alarm clock’s assurance that it was, indeed, three thirty -- three and a half hours after dawn, and time to wake up.

Her mane was strewn about in her face and shoulders, her pillows were on the floor, her blanket was balled up against the wall, and a thin sheen of sweat graced her fur. “Not again, not again,” she muttered, moving off the bed, looking for any wet spots.

A banging on the door came nearly the moment she shut off her alarm. “Twilight! Are you okay?”

“Oh! Uh, I’m fine, Spike. Everything is fine.” Warmth still sat in her nethers, but at least there didn’t seem to be any need for extensive cleanup. Other mornings, she’d had to wash the sheets surreptitiously.

“You sure? You sounded like you were having a nightMAAAGRHG!” Coughing came, and a plopping sound. “Uh, sorry. You have a message from the Princess, and I think I singed your door.”

“It’s fine. Just leave the scroll there and please draw me a bath. I think I need one today.”

“Oh.” Spike paused . “Are you sure you’re all right?”

“Yeah, I’m sure. Really. I just had a nightmare, like you said.”

“Okay. I’ll get your bath going.”

Twilight flopped back on the bed for a moment.

Nightmare indeed. Twilight had been having sexual dreams virtually every night for a full two months. Each time something would be different, like the partner or the perversions or the setting. Once Dash held her down in her cloud house. Once, it was Fluttershy and a bear. Another time was the pegasus guard she’d met for all of five minutes, Flash Sentry.

She couldn’t let this go on.

Twilight opened the door, swiped up the scroll with magic, and shut it again, deftly.

My Faithful Student,

Princess Luna wishes to see you this afternoon. Please arrive at the time and location indicated.

-- Princess Celestia

“And now this,” Twilight groaned. Today was just getting worse and worse; now she was going to be worrying, incessantly, about what Luna wanted to see her for.

“It’s all set,” Spike said from the other side of the door

Twilight was startled enough to drop the scroll. “Oh! Okay. Thank you, Spike.” She yawned and went into the bathroom.

The tub was not merely ready. Spike had gone a little further -- three candles on the sink were lit, and Twilight could tell he’d put in the sandalwood bath oil. “Thank you indeed,” she muttered, getting in and settling back.

She’d need to be as relaxed as she could possibly get.

* * *

For the most part, Twilight felt put together when she arrived at the agreed location for tea. It was a private room in the castle, which only made her more nervous, but the sun was high and the day still had hours left before nighttime.

Before dreams would come.

She got there early, of course. Minutes after four noon, Twilight was there, and within a few minutes she was seated and sipping at the first tea of the teatime.

Rituals were rituals. Teatime came with three courses of tea and selected desserts meant to complement each course of tea. Today’s first tea was an Earl Gray Nag with a lesser bergamot to reduce bitterness a tad, and it was lovely.

The door opened behind Twilight, and she turned to see Luna shutting the door behind herself.

“You’ll have to excuse me, Twilight. This is, admittedly, a bit of a ruse.” She shook her head. “We won’t be having tea today.”

“We...oh. Well, I’m sure you had something you wanted to talk to me about.”

“Please do not be upset by what I need to speak with you about, Twilight -- nor what I need to do.” Luna cleared her throat. “This, ah, is a difficult thing to explain.”

Twilight blinked. “Is there anything I could do to make it easier?”

Luna bit her lip, brow furrowing, and then crossed the distance between herself and Twilight. “Give yourself to me.”

“Um, what?” Twilight leaned a little back. “What do you mean by that?”

“Give your body to me. Let me pleasure you.” Luna leaned in to nuzzle at Twilight’s cheek, and Twilight fell sideways right off the chair, onto her back.

“Pleasure?!”

“Oh! Twilight, right here on the floor?! You are such a passionate creature!” Luna’s eyes lit up and she yanked the chair away telekinetically, advancing over Twilight. “Please, Twilight. I can’t resist. Don’t tease, just . . . let me.”

“Let you -- “ Twilight cut off as her eyes caught on something swinging below Luna’s belly. “Wait, wait, what is that?!”

“Alicorn anatomy is unusual, Twilight. I thought you knew. Either way, I cannot hold back any longer.”

“But, Luna, I -- “

“Twilight,” Luna said, simply. Her brow relaxed, then furrowed in seeming worry. “Twilight. Twilight?”

Twilight woke with a start, falling out of her chair.

“Princess Luna?”

Luna was standing over her, but this was no nightmare. Twilight rubbed her face.

“You seemed to be having a bad dream. That’s actually part of why I called you for tea, Twilight.” Luna helped Twilight back on her hooves. “Of course, I do enjoy having some company around now and then, and we don’t really talk enough anyway.”

“Right. Of course.” Twilight hesitated, then dipped her head down, looking underneath Luna. Nothing was there.

“Are you all right?”

“Yes! Yes, I am. I’m much better than I was in the dream.” Twilight took a few sips of her cold Earl Gray Nag. “I’m sorry. I haven’t been getting a lot of sleep.”

“I know, Luna murmured.

Twilight coughed on the tea, and found herself gasping for air. “How -- no, no, you -- you haven’t . . . “ She swallowed and tried to breath slowly. “Please, Princess, tell me you haven’t been watching my dreams. Please tell me that. Please?”

Luna tilted her head. “Twilight, I come into the dreams of those in great distress. There are, ah, exceptions, but generally that’s the only reason I enter dreams.” Her lips pursed. “However, even if I do not enter a dream, I still get a sense of it. In this case, I know you’ve been having troubling dreams, and I know there is, ah, intimate content involved.”

“How do you know that?!” Twilight shrieked. Her face felt warm and she could hear her blood in her ears. “If you didn’t see, I mean, then . . . “

“Please calm down, Twilight! Please.” Luna sighed. “I know this is hard for you. The sense I get of dreams tells me whether there is arousal, sexually, in it. If there is, I leave a pony to their private thoughts.” She looked into her tea for a few moments. “Yours started as bothersome, but have gradually grown to make you dread sleep entirely. This is not healthy.”

“I know,” Twilight whimpered, wishing she was absolutely anywhere else.

“I think it’s best if we talk more about this. Something is wrong with you, and it may be something I can help you with.” Luna brought up a bit of a smile. “I thought perhaps a bit of distance might help. Honestly, if you’re having the dreams I suspect you are having, it would be difficult to discuss with Tia, or even perhaps with the other Elements.”

“I . . . “ Twilight tilted her head. “I suppose that might actually prove true. Goddess knows I don’t want to have to discuss it with Princess Celestia.”

Luna nodded. “I promise I will never, ever divulge anything about your dreams to her. It is my domain, and while she has her, ah, ‘daydreams’, I don’t think those are going to approach what you’re experiencing in nearly the same way.”

Twilight hesitated.

“Twilight, I understand this is difficult. If you need time -- “

“I know I need deep, untroubled sleep. It's just that the nature of the dreams I'm having, it's hard for me to know about it. I'm not sure how I'd handle someone else knowing about it." Twilight failed to stifle a yawn. "For a while, I’d honestly considered coming to you myself, and asking to find some way to suppress dreaming altogether.”

Luna’s brow furrowed. “I cannot imagine how you’re suffering if it has come to that, Twilight. I can reduce the frequency a bit, but really, it’s better if it is dealt with. I am truly sorry.”

Twilight shook her head. “Don’t be. It’s not your fault at all. It’s mine.” She hesitated. “Can I just sleep on it?”

Luna’s lips tightened a moment. “It’s not a decision you should make lightly.”

“Ideally I’d keep it under control myself. I do appreciate the offer, though.”

Luna smiled again. “Well, the offer stands, Twilight. Let me know what you decide, and if you can’t make a decision, that’s a fine answer as well.”

Twilight nodded and sighed. She was exhausted beyond exhausted; she’d need to sleep and see if it was dreamless tonight. She could only hope.

“Well, Twilight. I would like to speak of something more pleasant before you leave. Would it be all right if we finish tea?”

Twilight gave a slight nod and sipped at her cold tea, suppressing another yawn.

* * *

By the time Twilight got back home, she was half drifting in the royal transport. She kept pinching herself with magic to stay awake, lest she drift off and find herself ravished by the guardscolts pulling it along.

She got out onto slightly shaky legs and nodded at them. “Thank you, sirs.” They nodded back and were gone within moments.

Twilight reentered the library and sat down at the table.

Spike leaned around the corner. “Hey! Did you have a good tea with the Princess?”

Twilight hesitated. “It was . . . informative.” She gave him a weak smile. “What’s for dinner?”

“Portabella steaks with daisy and asparagus.”

“Thank Celestia! Something substantial.” She plopped into the chair. “Spike, honestly, I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

“You’d be fine. You’d just have to hire a cook,” he chuckled from the kitchen.

“Ha ha ha,” she snorted back. “I’m just going to sit out here until you’re done, okay?”

“Sure. I know you’re tired.”

Twilight blinked, then got up on her hooves and came into the kitchen. “How do you know that?”

Spike looked at her as he slid the steaks onto separate plates. “C’mon, Twi. It’s pretty obvious. Seems like you’ve been having nightmares every night lately, and you always look terrible in the morning. Everyone’s noticed.”

“Everyone?”

“Well, all the other girls, I mean. Pinkie and Rarity both asked me about it, and I told them you’re having nightmares and not getting a lot of sleep.”

“Oh.” She swallowed. Why on earth would he tell them? “Why, uh, why did you do that?”

Spike tilted his head and laid the daisies beside the asparagus. “Because they were worried about you? Why wouldn’t I?”

Twilight knew they’d suspect. They’d know. They’d figure something out. Rarity in particular was entirely too capable of intuiting things like this! “I, uh, yeah. Sure. Sorry.” She swallowed and shrugged it off.

Spike picked up both plates. “C’mon, Twilight. Let’s eat before it gets cold.”

* * *

Twilight sat, reading. For some it was too low-intensity to keep themselves awake, but Twilight knew a good book could keep her attention no matter what. She specifically chose a text she hadn’t read before, but also one that wasn’t like most of her nighttime reading, lest associations drag her into an unwanted slumber.

A knock came while she was reading about a fascinating new attack on Fermare’s Theorem.

“Spike?” A moment of silence. “Oh, right, he took a walk,” Twilight muttered, shaking her head. She got up and went to the door to find Pinkie Pie. Behind her were all four of the other elements. “Oh. Hey, girls. What are you all doing here?”

“Hey, Twilight!” Pinkie piped up as the others all trotted in. “Spike told us about your problem, and I think we figured out a solution!”

Twilight blinked, looking around at all of them. “Uh, he doesn’t really know the details, Pinkie. I appreciate what you’re all -- “

“Oh, of course not! But we all kind of talked and worked it out. You’ve been having lots of sex dreams!”

Twilight struggled for breath; her legs felt shaky. “What?! That, uh -- it -- it’s not true, it -- “

“Now, darling, we are rarely wrong when we all put together our information about you. I think, based on your reaction, that we’ve hit the nail on the head.” Rarity had a knowing smile.

Dash snickered. “Head.”

AJ cut a look at Dash. “C’mon, Rainbow. Twi’s uncomfortable enough as it is.”

Fluttershy nodded. “Dash, this really isn’t the time for jokes. Our friend isn’t dealing well with this problem and we need to help make her comfortable.”

Twilight swallowed. “I really don’t want to talk about this, girls, I’m sorry. It’s a private matter.”

Rarity smiled wide and stepped forward, closer to Twilight. “Oh, Twilight . . . we’re not interested in talking at all.”

Twilight shuddered as Rarity’s mouth met her own, and tension flowed through her flesh. A tongue parted her lips, and hunger grew in her body.

Before Twilight could think more about it, her tongue responded in kind, stroking at Rarity’s.

Words floated to her, seemingly from Fluttershy. “We can make you very, very comfortable, Twilight,” she purred.

Touch came in the form of licks. Two mouths came to her wings, which had flared open during the kiss, it seemed. From the expertise used in the preening, it seemed certain that Dash and Fluttershy were the two working there. Every feather was attached to sensitive flesh, and every movement of them came with corresponding pleasure.

“See, I think you’re getting right calm now,” AJ breathed, and the warm words washed over Twilight’s ear. She bleated a moan into Rarity’s mouth, then fell into whimpering further as Rarity lifted her mouth away.

“Darling, let us help you. You needn’t worry,” she murmured, nosing at Twilight’s cheek.

Breath washed over Twilight’s sex, and her tail lifted. She was ready, fuck was she ready. Four other mouths moved over sensitive flesh.

Rarity moved to the other ear as Applejack moved into place to kiss Twilight and Pinkie’s tongue gave the first lapping stroke across her sex and Fluttershy and Dash took another few primaries in their mouths --

Spike jostled her again. “Twilight! Wake up!”

Twilight gasped for air like she was drowning. Maybe she was. She blinked at Spike, shaking her head.

“You were making sounds and I heard your book fall, and I came down here, and . . . “ He looked down, brow furrowing. “I think you peed in your sleep, Twilight.”

“Spike,” Twilight gasped out, shaking her head. “Go upstairs. I’ll clean up. Please.”

“It smells weird.” Spike hesitated, his lips pursing for a moment, and then his eyes lifted up and met Twilight’s.

“Please,” she whimpered, shaking her head with more emphasis. “Just go upstairs.”

Spike blinked a few times, and took a step back. “Are you okay, Twilight?”

“No. I am not okay,” she whispered. “Spike, I need you to take a letter once I’m done cleaning up. It’s for Princess Luna, but Princess Celestia will give it to her.”