Everypony knows that there are only two tribes of pony: Pegasus ponies and Earth ponies. Everypony knows that Empress Celestia is a perfect fusion between the two and that only she can push the sun and the moon. Everypony knows that dragons are extinct; the honorable Knights of the Empress have slain them all.

After their parents abandoned them, raising Twilight, Trixie, and Spike in the slums of Manehattan is not the best life Shining Armor could have wished for. After all, you tend to be treated as freaks when three of your family can move things with their minds and your adopted nephew is a supposedly-extinct, fire-breathing, pony eating monster.

Still, working for the Orange family crime syndicate as "dirty hooves" has its perks. They get protection, food, shelter, and some spending money. So what if they have to rob banks or assassinate pegasus nobles every now and again?

Additional tags: Battle Magic, Alcohol, Internal Magic, Mature!Familiar!Spike, Thief!Trixie, Mercenary!BattleMage!Twilight, Assassin!Shining Armor.