What The Hay

Bleh. Bleh blehbitty blehbetty bleh. So said Prunecess Twerplight Sturkle as she blehed her way down the street. Meanwhile, Rainbow Derp flew upside down with her tongue hanging out of her mouth and derped with every derpish derp, I mean flap, of her wings. And then Pinkie 3.14 came and said, "Oatmeal, are you crazy?" And the oatmeal replied "YES I AM CRAZY." And Pinkie 3.14 replied "No you're not, I'm the crazy one." And her cutie mark was crazy as well. It shot balloons at the oatmeal, which shot totally random and completely irrelevant Queen Chrysalis action figures at her. One of the action figures grew until it was ten feet tall and started yelling that it was a lawn mower. "You're not a lawn mower!" Fluttermeep meeped. "You're a ten foot tall monster!"

"I AM NOT A MONSTER!! I AM A LAWN MOWER!!" the action figure responded in a nasal voice that resonated throughout Equestria. And at its resonation Princess Derplestia raised her white muzzle and saw the ten foot tall action figure.

"FUNA WE HAVE TO GO NOW!" Derpleastia whose name was suddenly changed roared in a voice like thunder. And Funa and Derplostia whose name is ever-changing battled the action figure for a slice of 3.14. But then the slice of 3.14 turned out to be Pinkie 3.14, and Derplistia almost ate Pinkie 3.14. Luckily the oatmeal shot a Pokey Pierce action figure at Derplqestia and the Pokey Pierce's horn indeed did pierceth Derplxestiaeth's royaleth buttocketh. Derplrestia hopped around in pain, shouting "FUNA GET THIS STUPID THING OUT OF MY ROYAL BUTTOCK!!" But Funa was too busy banishing the Pokey Pierce to the sun. And when the Pokey Pierce was banished to the sun it grew  zeptillionfold and spun around and around in the sky. Then Colgate whose name is actually apparently Minuette appeared and advised everypony:

"Be sure to brush your teeth, kids, or else the world will descend into chaos! We will live in a world of moldy teeth and bacteria!"

And then Vinyl Thatch blasted her to the moon with Pinkie 3.14's cannon (but it was actually her own), but Colgate whose name is actually apparently Minuette dropped her toothbrush on the way to the moon and the toothbrush landed in Derplwstia's screaming mouth and she choked on it and Fuma had to get it out of Derpgstia's mouth. Fuma banished the toothbrush to the moon for good measure. And then the world was quiet for about 1.1893764729761479365973659173109739651907963917659173659797346597165917635 seconds, plus one zeptosecond (which actually exists because I read about it in National Geographic Kids, true story). And then Pinkie 3.14, Pruncess Twerplight Sturkle, Rainbow Derp, Fluttermeep, Applejerk, Raricurilque, Derplzstia and Fuma saw the ten foot tall action figure whom everyderpy had forgotten about. The ten foot tall action figure screamed, I WILL KILL YOU ALL and she goobled them up. I mean gobbbled. I mean boddled. I mean gobbled. There, I got it right. And Fuma blasted them all. I have no idea what I'm writing.

OCTURDIA IS BEST PONY