Chapter 4. I'm Sorry.

Twilight sat inside her library looking at the newest edition to her personal collection of rare books. She inhaled the musk of the old pages giving her a euphoric feeling of happiness that spread through out her being. "Oh Mr. Book if only you could talk." She inhaled the musk again but this time it was beginning to make her wet. "Hmm, you know just how to make this librarian so horny."

Twilight got into position on her back. Her hind legs spread giving view of her puffy marehood and engorged clit. She enwrapped the old tome with her magic, the spine placed right at the lips of her marehood ready to officially add the book to her collection.

Twilight eased the spine in close ready to feel the euphoria of having sex with a priceless tomb...

"TWILIGHT!!!"

Until a pink blur came crashing through her front door.

Twilight lied back stock still, her horn glowing with the tomb still in enwrapped in her magic so very close to aching marehood. But now there was something else that was also close to her marehood. Well somepony. "Ummm. Twilight? What are you doing?"

Twilights left eye twitched before her horn let out a large spark sending Pinkie and the book flying across the room. The lavender mare jumped to her hooves frantically breathing as cabinet full of books fell over squashing the pink party pony.

"PINKIE!" Twilight yelled. Grabbing as many books with her magic as she could, Twilight flung them away to save her pink friend from the books of doom.

As the weight of the books lessened, Pinkie's pink party head popped from a small pile her eyes spinning in their sockets as her tongue lolled out from her mouth. "The birdies go round and round and round going tweet, tweet, tweet."

"Um, Pinkie?" The lavender mare question. Hearing those words the Pink Party Pony comically shook her head, her eyes snapping shut letting her eyes adjust to their rightful place so her eyes wouldn't go Derpy.

(Although there is nothing wrong with Derpy eyes only that Derpy is the only mare that can pull them off)

Pinkie gasped in shock before glaring to the naughty librarian. "Twilight how could you!" She said with a stern voice. "Why if Star swirl The Bearded caught you raping that poor defenseless book he'd be devastated."

Twilight flopped on the floor crying. "I-I knowwwwww!" She cried. "I can't help myself Pinkie! Books they're, they're just so SEXY!" The lavender mare cried into her hooves.

"Shhh. It's okay Twilight, we're only ponies." Pinkie pat her friends back to come her down.

"Wait a second!" Twilight yelled, jumping onto her hooves causing Pinkie to fall back onto another bookcase where another cascade of books fell on her pink head. "How dare you insinuate that I raped this book! I'll have you know this one just like many others are part of my personal collection. So what I do with my beautiful sexy books is my business Miss Pie."

Pinkie didn't hear a single word Twilight had said. Instead the pink mare was imagining a night with her colt-friend in some... Very erotic positions. "Mmmm. Right there! Oh Mr. Peabody! Yes! Yes! Keep hot dogging my buns!"

...Twilight was confused, flustered and... Just completely freaked out. "Uhmmm... Pinkie? You okay?" Twilight asked stepping closer to her hallucinating friend.

"Wait! Don't go Mr. Peabody! I-I love..."

"Pinkie snap out of it!" The lavender mare yelled again. The mare by accident took hold with magic her tomb covered in her own mare juices and used it to smack the pink party pony across the face. Pinkies eyes derped again as juices smeared across her cheek. "Pinkie? You okay now? And who's Mr. Peabody?"

A loud gasp rang through the air as Pinkie Pie jumped into the air frantic over something. "TWILIGHT!!!" She screamed. "Wehavetohurry! MypinkiesensewentofandBicMacsgoingtocheatonRainbowDashifwedon'thurry!!!

The lavender unicorn blinked very and utterly more confused then she was one minute ago. "Pinkie can you slow it down, I can't really understand you."

"Oh, okely dokely Twilight. Well earlier my 'Pinkie Sense' went off with an eye poke, twitchy tail, and inflamed appendix. That means somepony said my name was adorable."

"Well that's nice..."

"No Twilight!" Pinkie quickly shoved a hoof into the unicorn's mouth. "I had another 'Pinkie Sense' right after. Hopscotch, nose pick, uncontrollable bladder."

"And what does that mean?"

"It means Big Mac is going to cheat on Dashie!" She screamed. Her blue eyes tearing up and her mane falling flat.

"Pinkie..." Twilight paused watching her friend start sobbing. "That is one of the dumbest things I have ever heard you say. First of all, you and I both know Big Mac would never cheat on Rainbow, second you do know their wedding is coming up in two months. And lastly how did you even know that's what your 'Pinkie Sense even meant?"

Pinkie sniffled before wiping her tears away. "W-well... The first time, I had a 'Pinkie Sense' that was similar to that one. It went hopscotch, nose pick, human hands. And then my hooves started growing fingers."

"Uhuh? And what, if I may ask does that mean??? And what in Equestria are hyuumanes?

"It means Lyra was going to cheat on Noteworthy with Bon-Bon."

Confused lavender mare is still confused. She was so confused she completely forget to follow up on the human question.

"Pinkie that makes no sense. Same sex couples don't exist in Equestria. Or... Anywhere in the 'My Little Pony Universe'."

"I know that Ms. Smarty Pants! Those things are just weird fantasy's created by those fat neck beard trolls that can't get laid."

"Exactly." Twilight said.

A relative pause came and went before a realization came to Twilight. "Say Pinkie. What did happen with that whole 'Pinkie Sense shebang with Lyra and Noteworthy?"

"Well it turns out Noteworthy had feelings for Bon-Bon as well as Lyra, and all three decided to start a herd together."

"Well that's nice of Lyra to agree to that."

"Well she and Bon-Bon have been best friends since they were filly's."

"So, back to the problem involving Big Mac..."

Pinkie gasped totally derping on her Big Mac 'Pinkie Sense' "Twilight you have to listen to me, we need to go to Sweet Apple Acres right now. I have a very bad feeling and it involves Big Mac!"

"Well why didn't you say so Pinkie! Come on we have to stop anything bad from happening to Rainbows Stallion!" And just like that the two mares took off from the library leaving a small baby dragon alone with pictures of Rarity and her husband.

Except Spike had cut out the pictures of Thunderlane and replaced them with pictures of the baby dragon himself showing how much of a creepy stalker the little weirdo truly was...

'Meanwhile Somewhere else'

Pinkie and Twilight made it to the apple family farm with no hitches. They trot past the gate and began there track on the dirt road that would lead to the farm house.

Twilight tied a leash and collar to Pinkie's neck before magicing Ms. Smarty Pants her old doll that Big Mac had taken years ago.

(What? You just thought Twilight would let him have her? She's magic. I'm pretty sure Twilight made a spell that would return her doll incase she lost it when she was a filly)

"Alright Pinkie here you go, get his scent come one you can do it."

"I'm not a dog you bitch, but thanks this will actually help us find him." Pinkie sniffed the doll then took off with Twilight holding onto the leash for dear life.

"AAAAHHHHH!!!" The lavender unicorn screamed, until Pinkie abruptly stopped sending Twilight flying a few yards ahead.

Pinkie continuously sniffed the air around her meaning Big Mac was close. Twilight on the other hoof slowly slid down the bark of a large apple tree.

Pinkie trot closer to her lavender friend and her something that made her giggle. "No Can-dance, I'm a bwig fwilly I can use the potty by mwyself."

"Twilight, snap out of it!" Pinkie smacked the unicorn upside the head bringing her back to the real world.

"Bwah-huh what?!"

"Shush! ... He's close Twilight. I can smell him."

Just then the red earth stallion known as Big Mac came running out from the orchard yelling. "Nopenopenopenopenopenopenope!" As he past by the the two mares.

Both Twilight and Pinkie looked upon the fleeing stallion confused of what the buck just happened. "Should we go after him?" The pink mare asked confusedly.

Twilight was going to say something but it would never come out, cause as soon as she opened her mouth a bright flash cake from the orchard. An explosion rung out sending apple trees flying miles away.

Out from the dust and dirt came a galloping white alabaster alicorn chasing the red stallion. "GET BACK HERE AND RUT ME!!!" She yelled with a voice so loud it would rupture the ear drums of anypony directly in front of her.

Again the two mares blinked confusedly of what in the buck happened.

"Umm, Twilight?"

"Yes Pinkie."

"Was that Princess Celestia?"

"I... I think so?"

"Oh... Was she wearing stockings and a saddle?"

"Yes. Yes she was."

"What should we do now?"

"Well..." Twilight stopped to think for a quick second. "Well I know what I am going to do."

"What?" The pink earth pony asked.

"Simple. My eyes are going to roll into the back of my head and I'm gonna faint."

And that's exactly what Twilight did. She fainted leaving Pinkie to fix everything...

"Alright Twilights out and there is nopony here to help me..." Pinkie placed a Human ww2 American helm with the rank of general on to her pink head and dawned a large battle axe from out of nowhere. "Alright times up let's do this!

Leeeeeeeeeeeeeroy Jeeeeeeeeeeeeeenkins!"

Least I have chicken.

Author's Note

Look another chapter!!!

Well that's good I guess. And random.

Anyway since this is out I can finally finish chapters for.

Who I've become Nightmare Moon

Brothers to the End

An Arrancars Justice

Who I've become Rarity

And

Your Brown Sugar.

Ta-ta