A Night to Remember

A Night to Remember

Oh the brain...

Such a treacherous little organ.

And there was me again, on my back upon a very worthy California King bed. I checked my vital sings to make sure I was still alive, everything was fine, so I walked along. Beside my cozy and warm mattress, the clock on the nightstand informed me the hours in red numbers: 06:37 pm

Vegas is a city that never sleeps, but the best part of the night begins only after the clock strikes twelve.

I stood up trying to shake my drowsiness away, feeling the cold breeze of the air conditioning system blowing against my neck, a chilling shiver ran down my spine. It was a city raised in the middle of Mojave Desert, living there was no easy task.

Though the floor to ceiling windows of my suite I could see most of the Strip, unfortunately, the bloody hangover together with my poor vision wouldn't allow me to appreciate much of the sight. It is the price you have to pay for drinking too much, and caring too little about your body.

I paced through the empty hallways of my room leading to the parlor, my shadow being my sole companion.

Right next to the front door a letter awaited for me, probably another unpaid bill, I presumed. I felt sorry for the hotel manager, he could never imagine that the polite and charming Mr. Lorenzo would give his place the debt of the century.

You know, daddy used to give me some good advice while I was just a little boy; very handy words by the way...

One day he came back home after a long night at the local bar, he picked up an empty glass and a Johnie Walker bottle, sat on couch with a tired sigh, and said to me - 'Ricky, there's no better medicine for a hangover, than a good shot of Whiskey. Now be a good boy and bring your dad some ice.'

Thanks dad, it was definitely one of the best things someone has ever said to me - this and 'if you smoke pot again you're gonna have a long talk with Mr. Leather Belt, ya' got it boy?'

A warm bath, some shots of Jack Daniels, and a bottle of that precious beverage in my hands later, I left the room with a feeling of decaying confidence. The long hallways of Luxor surrounded the floors of the pyramid-shaped building, allowing the guests to have an incredible view of the lobby and stores far below. It gave me a hell of vertigo.

Inside the elevator, I quickly checked my wallet and murmured something to myself. I had enough for only two or three days at the average nightclubs, but anyway; another dollar another day.

I was tired of that sort of life. Tired of my ridiculous routine.

I wasn't willing to spend the rest of my money in average days, hell no. I'd burn that shit with style, who cared about the future; I would wreck that place!

And then the elevator door opened while I still leaned against it. Losing balance, I fell face first on the marble floor of the lobby. What a wonderful way to start my night. At least I could say I was lucky; my whiskey remained intact.

It was around 8 pm, I had enough time to spend until my cinematic escape from the city tomorrow, walking to the hotel front desk, I asked for a valet to bring my car.

What? I'm rich, and I like valets!

While I waited for my car, something very strange happened. I was boringly walking around the lobby, enjoying displays filled with items I could never afford, until I noticed a large mirrored panel fixed on the wall.

It was just a decoration of a jewelry store facade, but it really caught my attention; in the mirrored surface I could see the reflection of people passing through the lobby, as so from several casinos and bars of Luxor. The entire place pulsed with life, and I had this felling like... A dejavu, but it wasn't a dejavu.

I can't describe it exactly, but was something like: 'Iwillnevergonnaseenoneofthisshitgainvu'.

Oh damn... I must have drunk too much alcohol yesterday.

"Mr. Lorenzo?" - Someone called me and pulled me out from the mirror trance.

"Oh, y-yes, this is me. And you must be the guy who brought my vehicle!" I shook his hands "It's a pleasure to meet you!" The skinny guy wearing a starchy valet outfit (Yeah, they have outfits) smiled awkwardly at me.

"S-sir, your car is ready, but..." He looked to the whiskey bottle in my hand "Are you sure that you're able to... Drive it?"

Oh, this young one doesn't seems to know what big Richard here can do with a sport car and a nice bottle of whiskey.

"Don't worry about this, I'm fine. Besides, today is a day to celebrate isn't it?" Strange, why am I feeling this peculiar joy? Oh Jesus, am I gay? What if-

"Celebration? Have I forgot about any holiday?" Asked the valet confusedly.

"Nope, It's my personal holiday, don't worry about it kiddo; just relax, go drink with some friends, catch some 'chicas'. You only live once so... Enjoy!" I got my car keys, placed a good amount of dollars into his shirt pocket, and left.

Fuck it, I don't have much money, but I might as well be hanged for a sheep as a lamb.

Finally in my car, my personal fortress. Inside this classy (and convertible) Maserati I felt like I floated in heavens, the large and cozy leather seats together with my fourteen speakers, aimed with 4.0 Advanced Sound System, made my vehicle a mix of a jet plane and a night club.

Also, how could I forget about the-

"Holy Shit!"

I braked the car abruptly, as for a couple of feet I didn't run over a group of passersby crossing the street. Dammit, that would certainly mess with my freshly washed and polished beauty!

Okay, forget the passersby; I need to solve a difficult and complex question; where would I blow my money today?

I looked around the boulevard; every casino, bar, hotel, was a temptation for itself. I swear, this lights must utilize some kind of hypnotic stuff, they attract humans like moths!

Let's see... I'm not in a good mood for poker today, or any kind of gaming by the way- Besides, my mind is in no sane condition for this, since I can barely tell the difference between an ace of spades, and my phone.

No gambling for today I guess...

About the bar; well, there are many places here, unfortunately I was kicked out or banned from nearly all of them. As I drove around the town, I couldn't help, but notice a new and vibrant building, which surely wasn't there last time I came to Vegas.

'The Cosmopolitan' Said the flashy sign right atop of the building. Bright lights, hot chicks, and as the outdoor says: 'Welcome to The Las Vegas Cosmopolitan'.

Shit, he says that I'm welcome! It's more than enough for me; The Cosmopolitan, prepare your security guards!

I parked my car and decided to give a quick glance around the place, it was built right next to one of the most traditional casinos of Las Vegas. From the patio I could appreciate the magnificent water show from the Bellagio fountains-

Ah! The fountains...

I still remember the day I decided to take a refreshing shower under those water arcs; sure, I also remember the security banishing me from approaching the casino again.

Good times...

My whiskey bottle was now almost at half, and It wasn't even midnight yet. Well, if I want to have some fun, better not get drunk before the party (I want to save my drunkenness for later)

I was just steeping inside the bar, appreciating the amazing decor of the place, when I accidentally bumped against a guy, causing his smartphone to fly away from his hands and land a couple of feet ahead.

"Ouch!"

"Ops, excuse me..." I said

"My fault, I was distracted." I leaned forward to grab his phone 'I just hope it has gorilla glass'- I reached it and immediately checked its screen, looking for any cracks. I couldn't help but notice a peculiar picture; why the hell this guy have a rainbow pony screensaver? Is this some kind of gay movement symbol or something-

"Thanks..." The man took his phone from my hands awkwardly and walked away. Crap, who can even understand this world today huh?

Rainbow ponies... Can you believe it?

Anyway, inside the Cosmopolitan there was an incredible place called 'The Chandelier Bar', it was beautiful, luxurious, comfortable, and- GODDAMMIT!

15 BUCKS FOR A WATER BOTTLE!

Holy shit! I think this is the price I have to pay for a stunning last night isn't it?

And there was me again; sat on a bar stool, in the middle stages of drunkenness (that one when you start to get depressive). On the table by my side, a happy couple chatted casually, something about wedding preparations. Are they happy? I really don't care, but truly, I always wondered about how would it be, to have a normal life.

You know what I'm talking about: An honest job, a wife, two kids, etc...

But no; I never had none of this. I guess that's the reason of why I am like this today isn't it?

I never had a normal family, my dad was the only one who really cared about me, mom left him while I was just a child. I really don't remember much about her. We had an enviable life, the best houses, cars, parties- But everything has its price...

We never had enough time to grow roots on a city, it was just a matter of time until my father find problems with the local mobsters (or the police). And this happened ofter, and for a very good reason (not so good by the way) ; My father was an arms dealer.

Nice childhood isn't it? I grown up hoping to escape from my dad's fate, but hey! The destiny like to play with us; just look who I became, look at this jerk ruining his life on Vegas.

A bankrupt vodka dealer, expelled from his own home, and in debt with the Russian mafia- Daddy would be so proud...

"...Another shot please" The clock showed two in the morning, and I was at my... Ermmm... Tenth shot (?) of whiskey. Dammit, even if they brought me diesel I wouldn't likely notice the difference.

"Look who ve got here my vriends... Mr. Richard!"

You're fucking kidding me!

I turned around only to see- Holy shit, and I thought it was just an hallucination!

"Dmitri?? Vlad?"

"FUCKING RUSSIANS!"

I jumped from my place, but where the hell went the casino? I looked around and saw nothing but a dim lit room (?) I checked my arms, my legs and my clothes; thanks god I was dressed..

I recalled the earlier events; I was in a carriage flying to Canterlot, Luna told me something about the 'soul bonding' thing she did with me, and about recently acquired immortality.

Shit, this wasn't just another alcoholic coma after all- Not that I expected it to be; I mean, I passed out and came back to conscience almost four times since I reached this magical land of colored equines.

The lights came on and dazzled my recently awake eyes- "Nightmares my dear?" I turned around towards the voice.

There at the doorway was Luna, and I was lying over some kind of divan. Just hope that she has not taken me to a psychologist. Really, after these days events I don't think I'm able to answer a single question about me without freaking out.

"Nah, just a strange flashback... Well, Kinda." I stretched my back across the divan and sat more snugly, leaning myself on its pillow.

Damn, those ponies really know how to do the things right, huh?

Luna smiled. "Good, so thou art finally recalling something! And what would be a 'Russian'?" She hopped on the divan and leaned her head against my shoulder.

Reality strikes with full force again... Blue talking pony cuddling with me, and asking about Russians. I wonder, what would be the logical probabilities of something like this occur?

I have diamonds in my clothes now. Fuck the logic.

"Well... Russians are strange people who just need vodka to survive. They like bears, meteors, and if you ever meet one, he will probably live on a damn cold city"

'Oh Rick, what a beautiful stereotype'

She tilted her head sightly to the left, trying to figure out the shit I just spoke "Erm... And, what would be this substance Vodka, that thou told us?"

"Oh god... Just- Just forget about it ok? Vodka is a really bad thing." The princess just nodded.

"Now, could you please explain to me why are we cuddling in some random couch at the middle of a hallway?"

I looked at the surroundings, and saw nothing but a large corridor, flanked by large stained windows. "Oh yes... After thou swoon at the carriage, we let you resting on the divan of eternal dreams, while we were at the night court."

"What for god's sake is a divan of eternal dre- *sigh* forget it... For how long I slept?" Remember your promises Richard; no questions about this place.

"A few hours, the night court ended short time ago, and we decided to came here to take you back to our chambers, but when I went into the corridor you were screaming like a filly about Russians"

Gee, I really have to stop fainting for every stupid reason, soon or later Luna will start to question my masculinity, and between us; when a magical unicorn call you filly...

"Besides, we were just arranging something special for thee, since your last nervous breakup- And that concussion too..." The night princess leaned closer against me and moved her muzzle to my neck. Dammit, I'm dating with someone with a muzzle.

'This is so wrong...'

I felt her warm breath against my skin, her hooves around me. "But only if it pleasures you... My master"

Oh no

"H-how the hell do y-ou know about... about the..." No way.

"About thy 'thing' with the master word?" She deviously grinned; still too close to my neck in a way that a single move made me shiver. "Let's just say that be the princess of the dreams, have its benefits" She whispered.

Great, now my wife can read my mind and search for my deepest thoughts. Thank you, God!

I was in no position to deny this, I just stood there gaping. It's not every day you have your own secrets throw at your face like this.

"So, what do you say to me master, can we go to our room to play?" Luna stood up and swung her flank just enough to tease me. For my father's sake, why this place needs to be so cruel with me?

Where all my morals and doctrines about this kind of stuff went?

"Pleeease my lord, we don't have all the night..."She bit her lower lip.

'Jesus! This freaking pony is asking for it!!'

Lip bites and bed eyes were enough for me. I jumped from that couch and wrapped my arms around Luna, kissing her passionately.

"I will show ya' how things works on Vegas miss..." I placed her hooves around my neck and pined her body right on the wall, while we interlocked our tong-

Wait a sec. Why this wall have handles?

And why its opening????

"Oh crap" It wasn't a wall, no, far from it. The two huge double doors that I shoved Luna into, burst open and made us flew right on the ground, I landed right over her, my hands pressing against the base of her wings.

"Oh master, this is so brutal and... Wild!" Oh god. "... Hmmmph, show me! Show me how they do it on earth!" While Luna moaned beneath me, I looked forward only to spot-

"Luna stop!" I stood up from the awkward position, just to see a confused Luna staring at me from the floor.

"What now? Master don't want to play on the ground?" Won't she shut the fuck up?

I held Luna's head and turned it to the side. And there was she; Princess Celestia, at her working desk staring agape at the scene unfolding before her.

There are moments in your life when you just wish a place to hide and die alone. I'm a imaginative guy, and already thought about many strange probabilities, but none of them came even close to this one.

Your wife elder sister finds both of you rolling on the floor of her office doing some kind of foreplay, and worst of all; she is a pony, a goddess, and-

Dammit Richard!

Foreplay with an alien unicorn for fuck's sake!

Celestia just saw her 'little' sister talking dirty right in front of her and worse: calling me master.

I just hope they have good accommodations there in the dungeons...