Inspector's Adventures!

What the- my forth wall breaking powers are diminishing! Oh sh-

Hello bronies, Discord here. I have subdued your author with my little miscreant son and his friend. Unfortunately for you, this means no more colorful pictures, stupid music, and other things this moron of an author adds in. Now is my time to write, so sit back and enjoy the show- err book.

[Joey POV]

I woke up in the morning with a strange feeling in my stomach. It felt like I was going to vomit. "Ugh, Vinyl could I call in sick today, I don't think I can do my chores right now." I get no response. A few minutes later and I realize Vinyl is not in the room. I get up to investigate, despite my stomach disagreeing with me. "Vinyl, stop hiding, I don't feel good." No response. I look around for about an hour before I give in to the urge to lie down. I was then greeted by a big smile from Discord. He was holding something silvery with an apple on it in his hand.

"Why hello there Joey, I see you aren't feeling well." He smugly says.

"What the hell did you do to me?!" I yell out to him.

"Oh nothing, it's what I'm going to do to you and Ponyville with this little device I have here." He smugly says then points to the device. He then proceeds to tap on it repeatedly. For some odd reason, I get up and do a backflip without trying to. It's as if something made me do it. "We'll what do you know, it works. Now let me put in your friend Vinyl." He says before tapping on his device again. Suddenly, Vinyl appeared out of nowhere.

"What the-" she starts, but is interrupted by a now devious looking Discord.

"Now to truly test my power. I command you two to kiss!" He diabolically says. At this point I run, but my feet aren't moving. I am somehow being pulled toward Vinyl. Oh my sweet Celestia and God's holy hand grenade no. I try and stop myself, but to no avail. I then in my desperation try to spare myself a lifetime of awkwardness by pulling out my bat and pushing away Vinyl. It works, thank Celestia and God. (And now I realize I started a controversy with that sentence.)

"You @$$! You make me stop trying to kiss her or I promise you, I will see to it that you be destroyed by my wrath!" He frowns, realizes his power is limited by others willpower, or atleast mine and my ability to disobey higher powered beings (like you Discord and writer!) and he then taps on his device a few times, and I turn in midair, and proceed to fall on the ground fac- muzzle-first.

"Darn your disobeiance to the author. Now time to vist sunbutts and become king." At this point I realize that he has the the IPod that belongs to my can't-afford-better-stuff-cuz-he-is-so-damn-cheap writer! He is godlike now, as what the writer says happens rule! Lucky for me, I disobey my moronic writer so I am safe from his control.

"Joey, what's going on? Why am I here, and where is Octy?" A very distraught and scared Vinyl asks me.

"He has the writer IPod. He can do whatever he wants. I am gonna need all the help I can get, maybe the editor could help, but for now get Doc." I tell her. She is shaking from fear, who knows what kind of hellish nightmares she saw in the Not Yet Written Into the Story Character Vault. She must be mortified. I reasure her that she is ok.

[Meanwhile, with the fabulous and amazing Discord, also this is me, Discord, showing you MY POV]

"How did you get so powerful Discord?!" A very weakened Celestia inquires before collapsing.

"As if I would tell you, sunbutts." I retort. She hates being called that, and she made that evident by firing one last bolt of magic at me. Luna walks in, but then is frozen in corbonite wheat. Yes wheat, I wrote it so it's true. You have to deal with it, Princess Luna was frozen in wheat. Celestia looked surprised for a moment, then laughed.

"AGH! I called the Elements of Harmony on you Discord! Now let me out of this prison!" A muffled princess of the night said.

"Do you think I'm afraid of them? I have the power to wipe them from existence now. I might keep your faithful student as a pet when I'm finished with her friends." I retort with a very smug smirk. I then turn all but Celestia's head into stone. "I want you to see your student fail. Also I think you will look quite nice in the garden."

"YOU MONSTER!" She screeches.

"Hey, atleast I didn't turn you into a potato, or something worse. Now think twice before freezing somepony with an itch they can't scratch." I reply. At this point the Elements storm in. I develop a large grin on my face. "Hello girls. Prepare to be defeated by the awesome power of words!" Everyone except Rainbow and Twilight laughs. And with a few taps, the elements turn into a vase. "Now will you take me seriously?"

"What do we do now Twilight?!" Rarity shrieks out.

"We fight." She replies.

"No you don't." I retort, before turning Rarity into a mannequin, rainbow into a hat, Pinkie into a monocle, Applejack into a sweater-vest, and Twilight into painting. I then teleport fluttershy to a field, far far away in another galaxy. "Now you all can be be together. Shame inanimate objects can't talk. Of course you all would be cursing the day I was born, but it still is a shame. I think I will put you all in the dressing room, next to Celestia's baby photos. You can't hide that blush princess." I smugly say to my once powerful captors. Well audience, if you need me I'm gonna release the writer for a little bit to write the author's note explaining why he took so long. He must be sore from being tied up. Don't worry, I will tie him up again, or maybe I will turn him into something to go with the girls. Ta!