The Harshest of Winters

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“Before the rain stops we can hear a bird. Even under the heavy snow we can see snowdrops, and a newly formed snowflake is the beginning of a new life. Like a new page in a unwritten story, one can rewrite and start a new chapter in ones life.”

-Rose (a friend)

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Arc 1: Chapter 2

The Hope Well

…..

I sat still.

Sitting there, I stared blankly at the gate.

It was hard to believe what just happened.

What I have feared the most happened just a moment ago.

I am separated from my home and I would never be able to return to it, not anymore at least. Now that our little game of hide n’ torture is over—they could have at least killed me.

"I'd rather be dead than where I am now..."

I took a glance around, everything was still the same as before when I would look outside.

However, even though I should havebe scared, for some reason, I was not. It must have been what my mother said as the gates closed. Those words empowered me with a desire, a drive for my will, it gave me the will to strive and survive in this empty world.

I sat on the cold surface that was snow-covered grounds, my hair hanged down in the way of my face. The winds blew in my face, pushing my mane in front of my eyes and obscuring my vision.

I could feel the chill in the air seeping into my wound, relieving the pain. I felt the burning sensation I had just moments ago cool down, helping me deal with the pain coming from the wound.

I took a deep breath and took a glance around.

“Where am I even supposed to go?”

I looked around, trying to find something, I could at least call a destination—but there was nothing as far as I could see, just mountains and more snow.

I sighed, looking at the ground.

“This is going to be tough…”

As the chilled winds of the north blew past me, I tried to pick myself up, struggling at first—but quickly swinging myself up.

I felt a spiking, throbbing pain from the wound in my left hind leg.

I recoiled a little, trying to readjust my balance so I would not put much pressure onto the wounded leg.

“My leg…” I groaned quietly.

I looked around, still failing to find something to use as a landmark to follow.

I sighed in frustration.

“I guess if I’m going anywhere, I should travel in a straight line. At least then I can come back here if I need to.”

“...”

How could I have thought that? How could I have been so naive as to think of something like that? There was nothing left for me here; I cannot just play into the thought of coming back for comfort, which is completely unrealistic.

There is nothing left for me, even with all my friends, including my mother; were easily outnumbered by the mass amount of drones inhabiting the hive. Besides, that place was more of a hell than a place to live. I wish my friends could come with me at least—but they themselves have dedicated themselves to their duties, even Zo.

"..."

Oh Zo... What will he think when he hears I have been exiled? He has been sticking by my side, keeping me safe just like my mother. He is practically my best friend; he will probably do something crazy like try and escape after me.

Sigh

"I hope he doesn't do that... Or any of them for that matter."

I started to trudge on in the opposite direction of the gate, there were no mountains—but there were some trees. Seemed promising at the time.

I pushed myself forward as the powerful winds blew against me.

......

It has been two hours since I have started walking and I have yet to find any sort of landmark or anything that looked even remotely safe. I have been hoping of finding something such as a "town" I have read of in my books.

I saw a ravine a while back; it was this huge scar in the earth that looked like it went down for a while. I threw a rock down it and did not hear a noise for ten seconds... I made sure to be careful; I did not want to fall down one of those...

Sigh

I started to think they do not exist, that the books written were lies. However, some of the books I have read were true, like when it talked about gravity, it pushes you to the ground—or how changelings have a natural hard shell that acts as armor.

Other than what my mother would teach me—I feel like something’s might be untrue, some of the things I have read in books. For example—one of the books stated there were many "villages" and "cities" inhabited by what the book called, "ponies". I have not seen even one of those things—so as far as I know, they are all lies.

"Or maybe those books are outdated..."

I have always had fantasies when I was younger about being one. I would be living in peace with my fellow pony friends and we would all love in equality. I would own a house in a town and my friends would stop by every now and then. It would be happy times...

"..."

Sigh

I stopped and shivered as another freezing waves of wind passed by, blowing my mane into my face. I tucked the strand of hair blowing back behind my ear and continued walking.

My body was getting colder as I travelled—but it was not supposed to do that. Our shells act as an insulator, keeping the heat inside of our bodies and protecting us from harsh weather conditions such as spikey hail or acidic rain, or so I have heard in the training room from the other lings...

I have long but stopped feeling the pain in my haunch—except it feels numb now, growing colder by the minute. It also does not help that there is a hole in my shell... At this rate, my legs will probably become frozen solid.

The gap in my shell had let in cold air, freezing my body from the waist-up. I could feel my legs developing frostbite from all of the chills spreading around my body. Without my shell completely covering me, it was practically useless.

I read somewhere that you can shed your outer shell, but it takes a very long time and the results are not really worth it; you become very fragile and sensitive to pain.

Not a very desirable thing if you would ask me, I do not want to be feeling this pain all the time, adding more would be overbearing.

Sigh

"I haven't looked up in a while..."

I lifted my head and saw a frozen pond in the distance.

"Maybe I can get some water..."

I walked more that day than I did ever have—and let us face it: I was not in the best shape of my life. I was breathing heavily and a little dizzy from exhaustion. I could taste hot blood in the back of my throat.

I took a long look at the desolate icy landscape before me.

"Is there even anything out here for me?"

I forced myself to start walking towards the pond; I thought it would have been ridiculous to die from dehydration.

I contemplated what the point was of trying to survive now. All I knew was that there might have been something out there I’ve heard rumors and stories about, I had not a clue whether it was true or not. That did not help considering I had not found a single form of structure yet. For all I knew, those books were filled with lies.

The last two hours have been my legs freezing and fighting the strong wind currents. My will was slowly breaking, and what my mother told me slowly lost its strong meaning of wisdom behind it.

I was losing hope.

At this rate, I felt it was impossible to escape the inevita-

CRACK

"..."

"What was tha-"

CRACK

I stopped moving as I heard the ground beneath me make loud, foreign noises, I knew that something bad was going to happen—but I didn't know what.

I started backing up slowly as I realized I was literally treading on thin ice when I brushed away the snow covering the ice.

I accidentally put pressure on my bad leg and recoiled in pain, losing my balance. I fell hard onto the ice, hearing a thundering combo of cracks as I did.

The ground began to fall apart, collapsing into the earth, eventually dropping me with it.

I tried to jump as far as I could as the piece of ground I stood on fell and I managed to glide around 20ft, grabbing the edge of what looked like a massive abyss.

I could not see a bottom at all, nothing but darkness filled the massive pit that just appeared. I knew I would never see the light of day again or even die if I fell down into it.

I held on for dear life as the ground I held onto began cracking under my weight. I tried to shift around to pull myself up, but my grip was too loose and I ended putting more weight on the edge.

Crack

The edge of the cliff I was hanging on started to crumble at my hooves, causing me to lose my grip and fall.

I began to free fall, my body frozen from shock. I saw everything around me become darker and darker as I descended into the abyss, the hellish darkness surrounding me from all angles.

I hit the ground, hard, sort of cushioned by the thick layer of hard-packed snow—but it was still enough to leave my entire body sore, too sore to move.

After I came to my senses, shocked at what had just happened, I began groaning in pain.

I tried to move—but my body was completely unresponsive. I decided to just lay back and not waste my energy.

I took in my surroundings; the area where I sat was surrounded by moonlight, probably coming from the hole I came from. Everything else was pitch black, I could not see a single thing.

I looked up to the sky above me where the floor had collapsed. It was the middle of the night.

I quickly remembered a time in the hive where my mother took me to a room with a glass window. I could view the outside world from there. Although we rarely went, she would teach me all about the different times of days. Sometimes I snuggle up to her and fall asleep.

A warm feeling traveled through my body, it was relaxing and helped me calm my nerves.

I took another look around. I was alone.

"..."

There was not a place for me; the world was just cruel like that.

I felt drowsy and lethargic as I lied in the snow; it felt impossible to move.

I realized I was suffering from extreme frostbite. My entire lower body had frozen over and none of my limbs would move when I wanted them to.

I laid back and looked up to the sky.

I remembered there were stars in the night sky that were beautiful spectacle of light that graced the sky with their beauty. Yet, I could only see one. It was shining—but not a lot; it looked like it was slowly fading into the dark abyss that was the night sky, it is life coming to an end.

A flash of white blinded me and I was taken back to a time that felt...oddly familiar...

I saw the inside of a house. I was sitting on a comfy rug spread out across the floor, there was a fireplace burning logs which filled the house with warmth, and my mother was there sitting next to me.

This must have been a time when I was younger—because I looked like a small foal. I also did not know where this place was, I have never seen a house that looked like this—but yet, it felt strangely familiar.

I saw myself look up at her with a sad look on my face.

“M-Mommy?” I questioned sadly.

She was looking down at me with a smile on her face.

“Try again Camilla, you almost had it that time!” She praised warmly.

She was trying to get my to learn how to walk, I must have not known how to at the time—but oddly enough, I could not remember this happening.

“But mommy I don’t wanna to try again! It’s too hard!” I whined playfully..

“You’ll never get to learn to walk thinking like that young missy.”

We both giggled.

I saw myself start to shift my body weight around, trying to stand up—but my knees were shakey and looked like I was going to fall. I closed my eyes thinking that I was going to fall.

“…”

I peeked open my eyes and saw my mother pressing her hoof to my shoulder, warmly smiling at me.

“Camilla, I believe in you. I know you can do it.”

I looked at her with awe in my eyes.

I struggled and lost balance a couple times—but managed to balance on all four hooves, standing perfectly still.

Light filled my face as I looked down and saw that I was successful.

“Yay!” I exclaimed with joy.

I threw myself at my mother and she pulled me into a warm snuggly hug, we sat by the fireplace, looking into it. She told me how proud she was that I was able to do it and how she was going to teach me to walk next.

“I’ll always be here for you, Camilla.” She whispered into my ear.

“I love you mommy…” I spoke softly, yawning while lying in her arms.

She smiled at me, and started stroking my mane.

“I love you too.”

After witnessing that, I began noticing that I was in a dream.

I looked around, noticing how everything was foreign to me, I did not know what this place was.

I began developing a splitting headache that gave me throbs of pain.

I looked over and still saw my mother and me, we were changelings like normal but… the area around us began dissolving into static.

I closed my eyes as my head reeled in pain again from the headache. I could not understand what was going on, or where I was, I had no recollection of this happening at all—except it felt familiar, like it actually had happened.

Static began filling my ears and the sound of the room began dissipating, being replaced with static. I could hear my mother whisper something in my ear—but it was inaudible.

I heard someone, a guy say: “Hunny, where’s Camilla?”

“She’s with me dear.” She raised her soft voice to respond.

I looked back up at my mother.

Her black shell was melting, underneath it was skin… Tan skin…

At this point, the static had filled the entire room and my ears felt like it was being pierced from the sounds.

I put my hoof to my nose and checked it.

My nose was bleeding.

My vision became blurry.

I looked up at my mother—but I could barely see anything. However, she looked… Different. She looked like another creature, something that was not a changeling.

I started to become nausea, the world around began spinning, and I ended up on the floor, staring into the endless static.

I felt like I was slowly becoming tired.

I could feel my cold body become warm…

I heard my heartbeat growing slow...

Everything was stopping, shutting down. It was hard to resist the urge to fall asleep one last time.

I began slowly closing my eyes, giving into my tired temptations.

And then my heartbeat stopped.

......

I opened my eyes,

I was floating—but there was nothing except dark space surrounded me.

It was as if the static had died and disappeared, I was floating in a pit of darkness, an infinite sea of shadows...

“Was this death?” I asked myself, deciding to test my senses one by one carefully.

I could not feel anything; I tried to move around but my body was frozen.

I could not see anything; all I could see was a pitch-black darkness surrounding me for what seemed like miles.

I could not hear anything; I could not even notice the littlest tone, there was not a single bit of noise in this vast void.

I could not taste anything; my tongue felt numb, and there was nothing for me to taste either, I would probably taste the cold if I were able to.

I could not smell anything; the void did not have any kind of scen-.. Wait…

I tried to focus on my sense of smell, and I could smell…

Sniff

“Flowers..?”

I tried to look around but all I could see was darkness. I had no idea where this smell was coming from. I tried to find its source but all of my senses were impaired to the point where they might as well not have been there.

Then I noticed something else: I was neither cold nor warm.

It was as if in death, you do not feel anything. It even rather felt… Good. Not feeling anything seemed like a pleasure, never having to worry about how I felt.

I never knew death could be so…peaceful. I could float around for an eternity and be secluded inside of my thoughts. I could just rest for centuries and not be bothered by anyone.

I started to feel hollow, losing a connection to my body.

Maybe, just maybe, I could be at peace. I did not like the feeling of the outside world, it was too rough, and it was too dangerous. I never took for granted the comfort I had when I was a child. Being able to snuggle up with my mother became a dream when I grew older.

I let myself drift off into space, my mind too.

Of course, maybe I am alone here, but that is cool too. At least then, for better or worse, no one could bother me. I am free here, free from all the pain the other world has caused me.

I thought about all the benefits to being dead.

It felt like my body was asleep, but my mind was awake.

I could stay here, forever.

“...”

Then I suddenly felt a bumpand the smell of flowers hit me, it was an intoxicating smell and it made me feel alive.

The smell was overcoming and I slowly felt my senses restoring.

A sudden chill overcame me and I wrapped myself into a ball—but it was no use, the cold would leave. My stomach however, felt warm, like I was laying on something soft.

I felt my senses return to me and I was able to move.

I wrapped myself tightly around the softness warming my belly.

For a short moment I felt something touching my face, it was as if I was being kissed on the cheek.

All of a sudden, I began regaining my consciousness and energy, I felt the elevating feeling of awakening.

A light had appeared above me.

“An exit from this void?”

I could see it. It was my way out. In a way, I wanted to reach out for it and leave—but something made me want to stay…

I wanted to reach out for it, but a contradicting thought kept me from doing so.

I wanted to stay. I did not want to leave.

I felt safe here; there was no one to worry about confronting or deal with.

I was truly safe here.

My body began to shiver.

“Wh-What’s going o-”

“Live on...” A voice said.

“Who’s th-”

“Live on...”

“Mom?”

“...”

“Go.”

A sudden rush of energy coursed through my body as my contradictory thoughts of staying diminished.

I only had one thought: “I have to escape.”

I slowly struggled to ascend out of the darkness of the void and towards the light above me. It looked like it was far away.

I tried my best to stare into it and see how far it was.

“Have I fallen too far?”

I suddenly felt a lot of pressure forced onto my body and felt the void consuming me. It felt like it I was erased from existence entirely.

I gasped in shock as I looked down and saw my legs slowly fading away.

Looking up at the light, I ascended with all of what strength I had left.

I climbed and climbed, as the feeling of my body, vanishing got closer and closer.

“I don’t want to die… Not like this...” I said with a trembling voice.

I could feel my hooves become numb as they vanished entirely.

Pressure began building on my eyes as I ascended as fast as I could go.

I felt like my body was being crushed and I started slowing down.

“...No...” I gritted my teeth.

I was close to the end.

I suddenly became really dizzy and it became hard to concentrate on what I was trying to do.

Nevertheless, I kept pushing.

I flew up until I could not go anymore.

I used every last muscle I had left, making one final push.

~~~~~

    [\

I missed the celestial gate of light by mere inches and began falling.

I started to lose consciousness as I free fell back into void.

I descended quickly back into the darkness from which I came.

I fell…

And I fell…

And fell…

Snap

“NO!”

I felt anger begin to engulf me.

I felt the feeling of pure hatred overcome me.

I felt as if I was losing control over myself entirely.

My body began to rematerialize slowly as I started climbing back up.

My fangs became larger and sharper, my eyes losing their gentle hue.

I was regressing into true changeling...

“YOU THINK YOU COULD KILL ME THAT EASILY?” I screeched psychotically.

I could feel a strangling hold overtake my psyche and I quickly lost control of myself. It forced me to speak even when I could not find strength to do so. Something was controlling me—but I did not know what it was, I tried to resist it as much as I could.

An aura surrounded my body; it was like a barrier of white fire. It lit up the void and protected me from its harm.

My body continued to rematerialize as it ascended with great speed towards light.

“I’M NOT GOING TO DIE LIKE THIS!”

I could hear the pure anger and pain in its voice as it spoke. It sounded like a demonic and twisted version of my voice.

The feeling of it controlling my body was agonizing, and every time it spoke, it felt like lava poured on my head.

I struggled to take control over myself—but it was no use, I was too weak to fight its strangling, overpowering hold.

It was in control.

We came closer and closer to the light, ascending at great speed.

I could hear its loud, raspy breathing as we flew towards the light.

My body, pushed to the absolute limit, began cracking under the undying pressure forced onto it.

It began laughing maniacally as it grew closer to the exit.

The light began blinding it as it made its way to the end.

Then everything went silent, its vision blinded by pure light as it crossed back through the gates of death...

…..

I opened my eyes and immediately began coughing up the blood that had been pooling in my mouth for what seemed like hours.

I had pretty intense nausea that lasted for about two minutes before it slowly began to die down; it felt like I had spinned in a circle nonstop for an hour.

After my senses slowly came to and my nausea died down, I realized I was on the back of something again.

I opened my eyes a little more and saw that I was laying on something with a softer shell than I had. It was moving in a steady rhythm despite the weight of me being carried over its back. It felt firm, steady, and faintly smelled of fresh flowers.

In my hazy confusion, I dizzily asked a question.

“Who…are you..?”

“...”

I did not receive an answer.

I took a quick glance around and we were still in the snow-filled wilderness when I passed out.

It was freezing, the wind was blowing hard against me—however my belly was warm from lying on the back of whoever this is.

It was comforting—but I did not know what was going on nor where I was in the slightest.

For all I knew, I could have been a long way from the hive… Turning around and walking straight probably will not get me there now…

As a gust of cold wind passed, brushing my mane aside. I looked up and tried asking again, this time trying to raise my voice a little louder.

“Who are you? What’s going on?”

“Oh, you’re awake.” A female voice replied.

I struggled to look up at her; my body ached with pain all over.

“Everything’s okay.” She cooed.

I found my guard lowering as she spoke to me with soft words.

“Just try to rest; I’m bringing you to safety.”

I could not understand what was going on—but I felt safe, safe enough to rest at least.

I was tired anyway; my entire body felt sore, and I felt exhausted.

I closed my eyes and listened to the sounds of the land as wind swooshed by, taking in the aroma of flowers from her pelt.

I ended up zoning out into deep thought, disconnecting myself from my senses out of exhaustion…

“What just happened? Was I dreaming?

Ugh... It didn’t feel like one, and my head is reeling.

Was I…on the verge of death?

Is that what death is like?

But if that was death…how am I still alive?

“...”

That...thingthat took over my body… It savedme.

Whatever that thing was, it couldn’t have been good, it made me lose control of myself; I could not think at all… Even my thoughts were being controlled…

Where did it even come from? I have never seen something like that before… I have never experience something like that before either…

All I know is one thing, that was notme.

“...”

I could just be over thinking it; maybe it was just a dream.

Yeah, but that was definitely a weird nightmare to have.

Hopefully I do not get another like that...

“...”

And just who is this ling? How did she find me and what does she want?

I guess she has good intentions, if she wanted to kill me, she would have done so already.

Even if I wanted to try I couldn’t just fight back, walking would be impossible let alone fighting. She could easily overpower me in the condition I am in…

She seems pretty trustworthy anyway… She does not have any reason to hurt me.

I guess the best I can do is stick with her, I am not trying to go anywhere in specific anyway. Anywhere is better than here.

Even so, a nap does sound good right about now…

I’m pretty exhausted...”

I let out a sigh, and relaxed my muscles a bit.

I heard her humming and used it as an aid to fall asleep.

She was good at humming...

…..

Twenty minutes have passed and she has long stopped humming.

I felt like my body was asleep, but my mind was awake.

I let out a yawn.

“Awake already?” She asked with a small laugh.

“Y-Yes…”

“We’re almost there; just over this ridge is our destination.”

“...W-Where are we going?”

“Somewhere safe.”

“...”

“Look, I’m on your side, I promise you that.”

“Who...are you?”

“Well…” She started with hesitation.

I finally had the strength to move.

I looked up at her, struggling to glance at her with a clear vision.

“It might not be safe for me to tell you right now…”

My vision finally cleared up and I could see her face perfectly.

She had light-red skin that was not a black shell, eyes that did not have a green glow to them like a changeling, and wore some sort of black mask that covered her nose and mouth.

“. . .”

“AH!” I screamed, worming around to get off her back.

“S-Stop!” She said in frustration as she tried to keep herself steady.

I fell to the ground, landing on my side.

I wheezed as a sudden jolt of pain shot through my body.

Looking back up, I saw her staring at me.

I started to crawl away from her.

“Hey, stop!” She exclaimed.

I swatted away her hoof as she tried reaching out for me.

“Get away from me!” I said in a shrieked in a fear-filled voice. “I’m not letting you kill me!”

I had a hard time trying to stand up—but I managed and got onto all fours. Every muscle in my body was aching sore.

I quickly glanced at her she was looking at the ground with sorrowful look on her face.

Gathering my strength, I turned around and started putting distance between her, walking away and me.

“I need to get out of her-”

Unexpectedly, my legs gave out below me.

I began falling to the ground and closed my eyes, bracing for what I knew would be a painful impact.

“...”

I opened my eyes and looked down, realizing I had landed on her.

She must have thrown herself at me to save me from the fall.

She was breathing heavily.

“T-Thank you…” I said, quickly sitting up and looking away nervously.

“Camilla…” She said as she exhaled, trying to catch her breath. “Why would I want to hurt you? I’m here to help!”

My eyes opened wide as she said my name.

“Y-You…know my name?” I looked at her questioningly.

“Yeah, I do, and I can tell you why.” She started, looking around with her ears perked up. ”—but right now all you need to know is that it’s my duty to protect you and bring you to safety.”

I looked towards the ground, regretting that I freaked out on her like that.

“And if we don’t hurry, your wound might become infected.”

I looked up at her; she was staring in my general direction—but not exactly at me, she was a little bit off, as if she was looking at my ear.

She had faded white eyes and a short, black mane that had a ponytail tied in the back. Her hair was a little messy too, as if she did not care about her appearance. She also seemed to be older than I was—but younger than my mother was. She looked to be in her early 20s and definitely seemed to be physically fit.

“She did carry me on her back…”

I gazed at her a little closer.

“Is she…blind?”

“I promise you I’ll explain everything when we get there.” She said with an upbeat attitude. “So please, let’s go.”

She stood up and held out her hoof as if she was offering it—except yet again, she was not facing my direction, and she was barely making eye contact and held her hoof out to my left.

“She has to be…”

I grabbed her hoof regardless and she helped me get up.

“Do you need me to carry you?”

“N-No thank you… I think I can make from here.”

I lied, my legs were sore and putting weight on them was not helping. I only said I was okay because I did not want to inconvenience her any more than I already have. I also felt bad about how I reacted to her, considering how friendly she is being.

She smirked at me.

“Alright, let’s get a move on.”

She closed her eyes and her body became still.

Her ears perked up a little, I could see them twitch.

“This way.” She stated, beginning to walk in the direction we were originally heading.

I looked at her in awe for a moment.

“Am I really going to follow someone who’s blind?”

I took a look around and could barely see anything beyond the fog and blowing snow.

Sigh

“What other option do I have?”

I began following her, starting slowly—but soon picking up my pace and walking along side of her.

I scanned her up and down observing her more closely.

She had a neutral expression on her face as we traveled—although I cannot blame her, it was stormy out here and this is not exactly a place you want to be.

He legs looked soft, not similar to the hard shell we changelings have. She also did not have holes in her legs like a changeling.

She was also wearing cloths. I am guessing she does not have a shell like us that keeps the cold out.

“W-Wait…” I thought.

I remember seeing something like this before…

I tried to remember what it was…

“Are you…” I started slowly and unsure.

She turned her head towards me slightly.

“Hmm?” She hummed with question.

“Are you a...pony?”

“...”

“Yes, I thought you knew that.”

My stomach dropped as she affirmed what I said, I was in the presence of something I have only read in fairy tales. The thing I have been dreaming about ever since I was little.

“Y-You do exist…”

“Well, I’m here aren't I?”

The feeling of excitement had overtaken me, as I looked at her in absolute awe. To me, she was a legend.

“W-Wha…” I stumbled to try to put together words. “Are there more of you?”

“Yeah, there are many cities filled with hundreds of ponies, that aren't unusual.”

I stopped for a moment, gawking at her at the sound of that.

“T-They do exist…”

I let my imagination run free as I thought of all the stories and fantasies I have had when I was younger.

I shook my head and realized she had gotten quite a bit ahead of me, so to catch up with her I had to walk on my bad leg. Luckily, the wound had become numb from the cold and did not hurt so much.

When I caught up, I slowed my pace and stopped using my bad leg.

We walked for a while in what felt to me was awkward silence, so I decided to break it by asking a question.

“So wait, you are telling me, there are hundreds of ponies in this world.”

“Millions.” She replied. “How do you not know about this?”

“...Well…” I said slowly.

“You know what, it doesn’t matter.” She said with a smirk.

I gave a smile in return—however, i know she cannot see.

“...”

“So… Are all ponies like… Well… You?”

“You mean blind? Oh, most of them aren't.” She said with a confident attitude.

“Oh.”

“...”

“Do you mind me asking when you… You know...”

“I was born without the gift of sight.”

“O-Oh… I’m sorry to hear that…” I said with sympathy.

“There’s no need to be, it doesn’t bother me much.” She stated with a reassuring voice. “I easily make do without anyway.”

I gaped at her in awe, amazed that her blindness does not affect her, amazed she had such a strong will.

“That’s... Amazing...” I murmured.

The sound of my voice was muffled out by the never-ending gales of wind that blew past us. Even I could barely hear myself, if at all.

She stopped all of a sudden, standing still with her head tilted down a little. After a few seconds, she gazed back me with a warming smile on her face, it seemed like she was blushing.

“Thanks.”

......

I hung my head in exhaustion as the wind continued pushing against me.

At this point, we have been walking for about fifteen minutes. I was literally running on fumes and my legs being half frozen was not helping, I just tried to keep up with her.

I tried my best to keep this pony in my sights, I do not want her to pull any kind of trick on me and end up dead.

"Even if she did do something, I couldn't just run, I'm barely standing as it is..."

I sighed, looking at the ground.

“What am I saying? I can trust her, she’s already proven herself…”

I noticed that her stature has not changed in the slightest. She kept on steady, the same as when she was carrying me. I was surprised at how she didn’t look even a little bit tired.

I tried to think about how she was able to do that, I barely had any endurance compared to her. She must have spent a lot of time training her body or something.

"And how does she know my name?"

Did she know my mother? But she is a pony and my mother is a changeling, there was no possible way that could have met. My mother told me she is only been outside the hive once or twice.

I took a closer look at the mask covering her face from her nose to her neck, it had a symbol on it that I recognized from somewhere. I think it symbolized balance or something.

She suddenly stopped, grabbing at her chest and squeezing her eyes shut. She wheezed in pain as she kneeled onto the ground.

"Are you okay?!" I said in shock, I quickly ran to her side and caught her as she almost fell over.

She was breathing heavily and her face was reddish.

"I am fine..." She panted. " The cave is right around the corner."

I could tell she was pushing herself, literally running on fumes like me. It must have taken a lot out of her while she carried me over her back for so long. I started feeling awful and hung my head, trying to catch my breath with her.

She tried to stand up but ended up wheezing in pain and falling, I caught her again. She might have been strong—but everyone has his or her limits.

I looked at her and she sort of looked at me. She was breathing harder than I was at this point.

I looked up to the sky and saw all the snow rushing past and the clouds slowly moving.

"She helped me get this far, it would be rude to not help."

I let out a final sigh and gathered the last of my energy reserves.

Slowly, I helped pick her up, putting her arm around my neck allowing her to shift some weight onto me to keep her balance.

I slowly started to walk forward, slowly picking up the pace and moving at a walking speed. I fought my way against the wind to push us forward. She was trying to put some effort into helping, but it was in vain.

I pushed myself to move forward, even putting some pressure on my wounded leg in order to move forward. The pain was terrible—but I pressed forward regardless, failure was not an option at this point, if we stayed outside, we could have died.

We managed to push all the way to the cave, it had a massive opening and looked to go pretty deep, it was nice and roomy on the inside, and I think I could see some kind of pool of water at the end of it.

It was a little dark, yes—but that did not affect me as we changelings had some kind of ocular ability that allowed us to amplify the brightness of the room. I did not think it had a name to it, none of the books I read said anything about it. All I knew is that it is something changelings had. I wondered if she had it—but I dismissed the question as there were more important things to do.

I pulled her along inside the cave and sat her down carefully alongside of the cave-wall.

"Thank you..." She sighed.

I did not know how to reply, so I just gave her a nod and sat myself down next to her.

I was exhausted, cold, frostbitten, wounded, tired, and dizzy at this point. I had no energy left, there was no possible way I could continue onward.

I scanned around the cave to see if anything else was in the cave with us.

There was nothing.

Sigh

I looked over at the pony sitting next me, she caught her breath and was relaxing.

"I never caught your name." I questioned quietly.

She opened her eyes and looked right into mine, she did not fail to look right at me this time—however she looked tense.

"R-rose Petal..." She said nervously, as if she was embarrassed with telling her name.

I looked in awe yet again, I had a tendency to be amazed when I learned anything about her or her kind.

"I like your name, it's beautiful." I said, giving her a compliment.

"I-I guess..." She said hesitantly, looking away and returned to resting.

I started looking around the cave some more.

I found comfort in this cave, it was smooth, big, and there was not anyone or anything trying to kill me. And the echoes from the winds outside created a beautiful white noise in the background that was calming.

Slowly losing consciousness, I rested my head on her arm without thinking—but when I went to move my head thinking she would be bothered, Rose began stroking the top of my head gently.

It was relaxing and it reaffirmed my trust in her. She even started humming a tune, it was calming and helped me let myself drift off. And eventually, I fell asleep with my body resting against her.

......

I woke up feeling warm.

I was cuddling close to Rose, I must have done it when I was sleeping.

I quickly got up, feeling embarrassed.

“Sorry…” I mumbled.

“Hmm?” She moaned tiredly.

She must have just woken up, she did not seem to notice we were sleeping so close together. I watched as she rubbed her eyes.

“What’s wrong Camilla?” She yawned.

“N-Nothing…” I spoke nervously, looking away from her.

“...Okay.” She said, getting up and stretching.

I looked around the cave and saw the pond of water again.

“Hmm…”

I slowly walked over to the water, examining it closely from an above angle.

For some reason, I could see the water shimmering, it was like it was calling me or something. Entrancing to say the least.

I tapped my hoof against the surface of the water and it made a droplet noise.

“Ooo…” I said in awe, amazed by the water.

“Oh good you found water, I’m thirsty!” Rose exclaimed, running past me and drooping her head into the water.

I could hear her swallowing it, she was being loud about it…

“Uh…” I started, staring at her questioningly. “Is that even safe to drink?”

She ignored me, continuing to drink it for a few seconds.

Finally she lifted her head and wiped off her mouth with her hoove.

“Yep.” She replied. “Try some!”

I looked at the water, it looked a little murky, a little too much for my tastes. I did not want to be poisoned anyway…

“Ehh… No thanks.”

“Hmm… Oh well.” She said, walking away a little bit and sitting down.

I saw the outside of the cave, and it was morning, we must have slept through the night.

I looked back down at the pond of water in front of me. It was still rippling after Rose had drunk from it. It honestly did not look very thirst quenching—but I guess if you are blind it does not matter how it looks…

After the rippling effects subsided I could see the shimmering of the water again, somehow, yet again calling for me. I did not know what it wanted, I just felt a strange attraction to the water.

I moved closer, right next to the edge of the water and I looked into it, peering into what was inside. All I could see was my reflection, and the shimmering. I could not even tell where it was coming from, there was not any light for it to happen.

I looked at my reflection, I was still the same as ever. Except… I looked pretty badly beat up. I had a few cuts on my cheek, a lot of bruises on my arms, and I looked awful.

My mane looked tattered and ungroomed, this was definitely not presentable and my mother would easily disapprove of me looking like this if she saw me. She would either take me to a mirror and fix it or tell me to go do it myself if she was busy with something.

I tried to brush it down a little bit, but that did not really help. It was all frizzy and frozen; I could not do much for it.

I looked closer and stared more intensely into my reflection.

Suddenly, the rippling subsided.

I could see myself perfectly. It was like looking into a mirror.

I continued staring and things only became stranger as my vision began to deform and everything became hazy.

I started hallucinating and I thought for a second I was back at the hive, looking into my own mirror.

My legs suddenly became weak and I sat down.

My eyes were perfectly fixed on the reflection. It started to transform into something else, I could see the area around it changing, rippling as it did.

I could not look away, I was locked onto the reflection. It felt like I was dreaming or something.

And then everything went black.

I was looking at a pitch-black world.

I tried to look around but could not see anything.

My eyes finally adjusted and I could see I was being held over the back of someone.

“Where am I…?”

I looked around and saw that we were outside of a place unfamiliar to me. There were houses with straw roofs. The streets were made of dirt and stone. Lanterns lit up the roads, lighting up the night.

“We have to leave, it is too dangerous for us around here, and they are on the search for her.” A female voice spoke in a sad tone.

“...They?”

“I know that, Caramel, but where would you even go?” A male’s voice spoke in a soft, soothing voice.

“I… I don’t know…”

“There’s nowhere for you to go…”

“...”

“There is one place…” The female spoke up.

“Where?”

“I’ll go to a changeling hive and hide away there.”

“What?! Meli that is crazy! You can’t! They’re not like us!” The stallion spoke loudly in a to-the-point tone.

“I can find a way…”

“Agh! You never listen to me!” He sighed in frustration.

I started to recognize the voice of the female, it sounded… Sort of like my mother—but it was as if she was a younger.

“It’s the only way for our child to be safe Silver Bolt!” She retaliated in a distressed voice.

“M-mom..?” I tried to speak up, I found it hard to do for some reason, like I was infinitely tired or something.

I could not move in the slightest, I ended up looking at the ground the entire time.

“Don’t worry sweetie, everything’s okay. Just try to sleep, okay?” She whispered in a soft voice to me.

I involuntarily closed my eyes, as if I was being controlled—but I could still hear what they were saying.

My hearing started to become impaired and their voices became quieter and quieter.

“At least let me come with you Meli, so I can protect you...” He pleaded to her quietly.

“...”

“No. I will protect our child, for she is my prodigy. Camilla is going to do great things one day and I have to be the one to assure that.”

I started to hear static and I could hear static as I began feeling detached from what was happening.

“I love you Meli, be careful okay?”

“I love you too, Silver.” She said kissing him. “I will, I promise.”

My mother started walking and my hearing became filled with static.

And then my vision dissolved.

I snapped out of the trance I was in and felt like I was about to throw up—however I resisted the urge too.

I sat down and rubbed my head.

I took a quick glance around to see where I was.

I was still in the cave and Rose was looking outside the cave entrance.

I looked back at the pool of water I was looking at just before hallucinating.

“...”

I could see myself in it—but for some reason, I did not look like me… I had…skin...in my reflection instead of a hard black shell.

I did not look like a changeling in the water.

I looked like a…

“Pony…”

“Huh?” Rose questioned from the door. “Did you say something?”

I continued staring at my pony reflection, entranced by what I was looking at.

“Hmm, guess not. I’ll be back soon Camilla, I’m going to go scout.”

I stared at the pony in the pond.

I wanted to be that pony.

I would have given anything to be that pony.

I hated being a changeling.

I did not want to live like this the rest of my life.

I wanted to be a pony that would be loved and accepted by others.

I hated the chains that were bound to me unfairly.

My body began trembling and the feeling of anticipation crawled up my spine.

“Am I still hallucinating..?”

I looked around.

“I don’t feel like I am…”

I glared back down at the pony in the water, she was looking at me too.

The pain of looking into my own reflection was excruciating. Every second I was not this pony, the more envy grew and manifested into my body, making me act and think differently.

“P-Please…”

I raised my hoof.

“Please…”

I raised it even higher.

“PLEASE!”

I slammed my hoof into the water, it splashed at me.

The water rippled—but the pony was still there, staring at me, mockingly.

Something snapped and I began frantically splashing the water with both of my hooves, trying to erase the pony in the water.

After about a minute of splashing the water, I stopped, breathing heavily.

I closed my eyes, trying to catch my breath.

I opened my eyes a little, looking down at the water.

"Please..." I said quietly, my voice was trembling in misery. "Please..."

I squeezed my eyes shut, a pressure was building heavy on my eyes.

"I've lost what little I had in this world, and now I'm all alone... Is there not somewhere I belong?”

I stared my reflection right in the eyes.

“W-Why…” I said stuttered. “Why is this world torturing me?"”

"..."

I gazed into the pond with my lost, ill-guided eyes. I looked deeply into it and remembered everything I used to have.

I closed my eyes, feeling all of those moment blow away into the wind.

And I lost what little faith I had left...

Drop

The pool before me started glowing with celestial light, nearly blinding me with its ambient beauty.

I stared at it as long as I could.

I started losing the connection to my body, it became unresponsive as the light had engulfed me in its cosmic decadence.

My skin felt hot, like it was burning—but the pain was nonexistent, it was almost soothing.

I felt a tingling sensation in my arms and looked down, my changeling  shell was peeling off, I could see and faintly feel my body searing from the immense heat the light surrounding me gave off.

I had the sensation my wings were being torn off—but the pain was nullified, I could barely feel it. It was almost like a tickle.

I barely understood what was happening. I could not move, I was blinded, and I felt warmth surround me.

It was... comforting…

I became tired, and started to slowly fall asleep, giving in to the light and allowing it to consume me.

Closer and closer I drew, the last thing I saw was Rose looking at me with a horrified expression on her face.

And then I fell asleep.

…..

I awoke in a tunnel of darkness.

It felt like I barely fit in the area I was in, it was tight, walls surrounding me, barely allowing me to move.

I remembered what this was.

I was in a dream that I have had for so many nights. It was one of my favorite dreams I have ever had.

Usually there is warmth emanating from the walls of the tunnel, they would it would feel warm and I would sprawl around and enjoy the dark solitary in peace.

Except… This time it was not like that at all.

It felt like the walls leaking some kind of corrosive neon-green acid.

I watched as it started dripping from the ceiling, hitting the ground and starting to burn it away.

I was not comfortable.

This place had become unsettling to me.

I did not want to be here anymore.

I looked, forgetting which way to go.

I saw a path that led upwards, probably to the surface of this dream.

In an effort, I crawled through the tunnel carefully, being sure not to get dripped on by the corrosive acid.

I realized my body felt weaker than usual—but I could not see anything.

It was like I did not have a shell to keep back the danger anymore. It made me feel insecure, I did not like it.

I reached path and looked upwards to it.

There was a light shining down the tunnel, flooding it with light.

It was my way of escaping, and I knew it.

I started to climb up the path, it was still a fairly tight space so I was crawling.

Suddenly, the tunnel began shaking and the path I started on was flooding with corrosive acid.

I began to panic and crawled as fast as I could towards the light.

“Camilla!” I heard a distant voice yell.

I continued my way trying to rush up the path.

Chips from the rocks above were falling out of place as the tunnel shaked.

“Where is this earthquake coming from?”

“Camilla wake up!” The voice yelled in the distance again.

I was almost there, I could see the exit clearly and perfectly.

I trudged forward. Rocks were falling and hitting my back as I did.

Unexpectedly, a drop of corrosive acid landed on my left hind leg.

The amount of pain it caused was unbearable, it felt like someone took a blazing hot piece of iron and stabbed me.

I tried my best to nullify the pain by not thinking about it.

Closer and closer I crawled towards the exit.

Closer…

And closer…

And then everything turned white.

…

I sat up in shock and immediately began coughing.

“Oh my goodness, Camilla, are you okay?” Rose said, attentively looking in my general area.

I breathed quickly for a little bit—but it soon subsided.

“Y-Yes… I just had a nightmare… That’s all.”

“What happened? Your heartbeat sound irregular compared to before.”

I could see her ears twitching.

“I don’t know…” I started slowly, putting my hoof to my head and trying to recall what happened. “I was just looking at the pond and something happened…”

My body felt as if I was submerged in boiling hot water and it was in the process of cooling off.

I looked at my arms to see what was wrong.

“...”

“My shell it’s gone!” I nearly screamed in terror. “And the holes in my arms are gone!”

I was panicking and I suddenly felt a soft, yet firm, arm wrap around me.

I looked up at Rose, she was smiling at me kindly.

“Camilla… You’re a pony now.”

My mouth gaped with those words.

I started to feel my face and my body, I could feel myself when I touched my skin unlike with a shell.

“Wha… How?” I questioned quietly.

Rose pointed towards the pond.

I turned around and looked into the pond.

My mane was still the same light orange as before—but except having a black shell to go with it, I had what looked like a yellowish light brown skin. It was amazingly softer than a shell and it did not exactly hurt when I touched it either.

But there was something different, all of the injuries and bruises I had previously were gone, I could not see or feel them at all.

I looked down at my leg to check my wound and saw that it was not there anymore.

However, there was something there, it was a scar.

“I guess not everything could be healed, but it doesn’t hurt at all.”

I stared long and hard at the scar on the reflection in the water. It reminded me of my past, the things I suffered when I was changeling.

At the time, I did not want to worry about it, so I tried my best to ignore it.

“How did this happen?” I questioned rose.

“The pond is a catalyst that, when the requirements are met, reverts a living being back to their original form.” She stated as if reciting something. “If a high-level polymorph has been cast upon them, it dispels it.”

I looked into the pond again and the most wonder-filled expression I have ever worn in my entire life.

“I’m… A pony…” I mumbled to myself with glee.

“...”

“Camilla, I know you’re excited and all, but we really need to get going.”

I looked up at Rose with a questioning look.

“We need to make it to town while it’s still day outside, the storms at night would kill us if we tried travelling then.”

I gave her a nod with a small noise to go with it.

I tried standing up—but my legs felt very weak and wobbly as I did. It was like I forgot how to walk entirely, the feeling was really strange.

I fell forward and Rose caught me.

“Be careful, I don’t know if you’ll be at full strength at first.” She said to caution me. “Let me carry you, we’ll be quicker that way.”

I thought about how Rose collapsed last night when we were approaching the cave. I did not want her to go through that again.

“But Rose, last night-”

“I’m fine now. I was just exhausted from looking around for you.”

I scanned her up and down. She seemed to be fine, she was not wearing a single expression that would give of a hint she was tired.

“Alright…” I started. “But-”

She put me over her back and began trotting out of the cave.

The light from the outside blinded me as we crossed the entrance of the cave.

…

“So where are we heading?” I asked Rose.

We had been walking for about 20 minute when I decided to talk to her. Up to this point I had just been sightseeing and thinking about just how amazing it is to be a pony, the things I have dreamed about coming true.

“To a city, I won’t leave you out here to die.”

I smiled at her.

“Thanks.”

“It’s no big deal.”

“...”

“Rose?”

“...”

“What?”

“Are we...friends?”

She suddenly stopped moving and stared into the space ahead of us for a few second.

“...”

She looked back at me, smiling warmly.

“Of course we are.”

I hugged her and she continued to trot forward.

…

As we arrived at the top of a hill, I could suddenly see giant walls, they looked like they were made of solid stone.

Rose’s ears started perking again.

“Camilla, do you see that?” She asked me.

“Yes.” I replied.

“That’s a city, it’s filled with ponies, just like you.”

I felt weird when she called me a pony, I am so used to being called a changeling that it felt funny to be called anything else.

“This place is safe, safer than out here.”

I gazed towards the city.

It was built on the side of a steep ridge, the city being built at the base of it.

The walls were protecting the inside of the city and stood high.

I was gazing in awe at this, it was just like the books described.

She gestured and I climbed off her back, it felt a lot easier to walk on my legs now—they still felt a little wobbly.

“The entrance is over…” She started, her ears started twitching. “There.”

She pointed towards what looked like a hole in the wall—but purposely carved out there.

“There will probably be guards—but they shouldn't give you any trouble. They only attack creatures that aren't ponies.”

Tingling fear crawled up my spine as I thought of that. They attack anything that was not a pony.

“What if they know I’m a changeling and attack me? Would they kill me?”

I started to tremble in fear.

Suddenly, I felt a strong hoof touch my shoulder.

I looked over and saw that it was Rose.

“Camilla, be strong, I’ve done all I can for you.”

“But can’t you come with me Rose?” I really wanted her to come with me.

“No, I’m not allowed in this city.”

“B-But…” I started. “Will we ever see each other again?”

“...”

“You’ll see me again, our paths will cross.” She said, smiling at me. She looked directly at me, her eyes were comforting and her words reassured me.

I smiled back at her, even if it was a fake smile. I was sad to see her leave after we had just met.

“Good luck.” She patted me on the back and walked off.

“Bye…” I mumbled.

I looked back at the gate, gulped, and began to walk towards the city.

…

I approached the gates slowly.

I saw two pony guards clad in armor looking forward.

I stopped myself around fifteen feet from them, I tried to conjure up the will to say anything—but I was too scared.

One of the guards looked at me and scanned me up and down.

“Proceed.” He said boldly.

I was frightened and recoiled, I laid down in the snow and covered my face to protect myself from harm.

I peeked up at the guard, he was looking around.

He rolled his eyes, starting to walk towards me.

“This is it, I’m going to be killed, and I can’t run now…”

He put his arm around me and picked me up, putting me on my feet.

He helped me walk towards the gate.

"Don't worry young lady, nothin' in the city is gonna hurt ya." He said with a smile. I looked at him blankly. His words were comforting, not threatening.

We crossed through the gate and he removed his arm from my shoulders, walking back to his post.

I looked at the city, it was huge; there were buildings everywhere and it was filled with many different types of ponies.

I was star struck by the sheer amount of ponies.

I donned a smile of confidence, thinking of all the things I dreamed of when I was young.

I remembered all the fantasies I had of a world filled with ponies, a world filled with harmony. Seeing what I’ve been dreaming of since I was young inspired me.

I held my ambitions close and began trotting into the city.

For the first time, adventuring bravely into the unknown.

_____________________________