Chapters A warm breeze, trees dancing in the wind. Clouds scattered along the sky like a sheet on a bed. Was I dead? It's too...beautiful. I must be dead, but how did I die? And why am I still wearing my gear? How can I have these questions answered? Odd, I'm still wearing my kevlar along with my pack, but where is my ammunition and rifle? I don't even have my sidearm. Does heaven forbid weapons? Surely it wouldn't matter if everyone was immortal in heaven. I should be wearing some comfortable clothes right now instead of this musty ACU.
I better get up and start moving. This forest is really dense...and dark. It looks a lot like that jungle in...maybe it would be best if I forgot about that. What the hell? Is that a chicken?
The cockatrice lunges straight toward the man, wings spread and eyes red and glistening.
"OH JESUS CHRIST! WHERE'S MY KNIFE? WHERE IS IT?"
Astintosh fumbles around his pockets looking for his trusty four inch blade, which is nowhere to be found. The cockatrice, at full pace, attacks the soldier with it's beak.
"GET OFF OF ME!"
Astintosh throws the cockatrice to the ground, breaking it's neck, sending it in a crazy wacky oscillation. Like a chicken without his head, it stumbles over some bushes and runs off.
"What on Earth was that?!"
"I better get out of here, I don't have anything to defend myself with. And I need to find something to eat, and I need water, shelter..."
Astintosh breaks down to his knees, hands over his helmet, tears filling his eyes.
"WHERE AM I?!"
=======================
"Spike, can you grab us something to eat? I'm starving. Maybe some hayburgers or something." Said the purple alicorn.
"Sure thing Twilight." Spike grumbles under his breath. Yelling can be heard in the distance, and it sounds unfamiliar. "Did you hear that Twilight?"
"Hear what?" Twilight said.
"Maybe if you weren't staring at your books you would have heard it."
"Spike, I have to study these books. What if Princess Celestia gives me a pop quiz, and then I fail it, and maybe she'll actually throw me in a dungeon?!"
"We've been over this already Twilight, the Princess isn't gonna throw her prized student in a dungeon because you failed a pop quiz. And besides why would she need to quiz you if you're a princess yourself?"
"Gee Spike never mind then. So what did you hear? What could possibly be better than my books?"
A knocking can be heard on the door.
"I be right there, hold on." Said Spike.
Spike opens the door, only to be startled so much he gasps and faints right onto the hard wood floor, along with Twilight, at the sight of an almost six foot human wearing camouflage.
"AHHHH,I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to make you faint! Whatever you are. I made that horse pass out too. That's starting to become very common with these strange, multi-colored, horses."
What do I do? Should I help them?
"Hello? Miss? Are you okay?"
Twilight's eyes slowly open. Hyperventilation is almost inevitable.
"PLEASE DON'T HURT US!" Said Twilight.
"No I'm not gonna hurt you, I actually wondered if you were going to hurt me. Hehe."
"What are you doing here?"
Again with the questions. When will I get an answer myself?
"I'm...not really...sure..."
"Well, if you promise you wont hurt us, then welcome I guess. I'm sure you haven't had the best first impression with everypony in town."
Every...pony? So these things are little horses? What a strange dream I must be having.
"Stay here. I have to round up everypony and show them that you're not evil and want to destroy the whole town." Said Twilight.
Twilight leaves the library, and the purple and green lizard thing is still asleep. Then blackness fills Astintosh's eyes, and his vision is obscured. He is punched in the gut along in the face and instantly knocked unconscious.
Where are my clothes? It's so damp, and dark. Am I getting tortured?
There Is a metal chair and Astintosh is bound to it with chains. A rag tied around his head covers his eyes, and the only thing Astintosh is wearing now is shorts. The ones he was wearing under his pants. A concrete room borders Astintosh. Likely to prevent him from escaping. His feet are also bound with chains.
Could it be any worse? Now i'm getting tortured. Wait, were those horses a dream? Has the PMC captured me? God I hope not.
"I can read your thoughts you know" A voice calls out, with a deep filter to prevent Astintosh from discovering who it is.
"What? Who's there?"
"I prefer to stay anonymous." Said the voice."I'm going to ask you a series of questions, and you must answer them."
"Or what?" That was a bad idea to ask that question, as electricity jolts and stuns Astintosh.
"We are not here to play games, now I will ask you some questions. First, Why are you here?"
"Unit number, Five Delta Echo...
ZAAPPPP
"I'll ask you again...why are you here?!"The voice rings out.
"Don't know what you're talkin' about."
ZAAPPPP
"Alright! We were on patrol, and that's all I remember I swear!"
ZAAPPPP
"You're not telling us everything Mas...Astintosh."
"How do you know my name?!"
"We know where you're from human. You are from another world. What are your intentions here?"
"What?! Another world?" Oh. Maybe that explains those magical creatures. "I honestly don't mean any harm! Like I said, we were on patrol, and there was an explosion, and then I blacked out. That's really all I remember!"
The tied rag on Astintosh's face starts to soak.
Oh no they're going to waterboard me!
A sensation of drowning fills Astintosh's mind. Creating a horrible sense of wanting to escape. As cold icy water spills over his face, all he can think about is how he is going to get out of here, and when.
"Please stop! I'm telling you everything I swear to god!"
"Take the rag off." The voice says.
Opening his eyes, Astintosh finally sees the horrible place he is in. A figure enters the room, and it's no simple small horse, it's a big one, and not one of normal size. But this one is like the Purple horse, it has wings and a horn.
"Sister he is telling the truth." Says the so-called pony.
"Very well then, guards, prepare for my entry" Says the voice with the filter.
Sisters? Odd. Not exactly what I was expecting.
Just then, another figure enters the room, even bigger then the previous, along with a set of wings and a horn.
Wow their manes are, certainly something to behold. Beautiful and flowing.
The binds holding Astintosh in place are freed, releasing Astintosh.
"My name is Princess Celestia, and this is my sister Princess Luna. Thank you for that very flattering...comment..." The Taller pony says.
"Your...welcome."
"We have no clue as to how you arrived here, but we shall try to get you to your home world. Unfortunately, there is a catch." Says Celestia.
"What catch?"
"Well the spell required to do so will only be possible in thirty years, when a solar eclipse combines me and my sister's power."
Thirty years! Who knows what will happen during that time!
"But also you're in luck, because we've discovered time is frozen on your world right now. But until thirty years, you will just have to wait here. Now, as for an apology for our rather despicable acts, please join us to the restrooms, our guards will escort you there."
Guards similar to the knights in medieval times approach Astintosh. They wear gilded helmets, along with gilded body armor.
"Please come with us sir." One of the guards says.
They take Astintosh out of the dark room and up some stairs. They go through multiple locked doors unlocked using their magic. It is no doubt that these beings are really powerful and could put Astintosh down no problem. As they pass through the doors, they enter a large room, with a dome ceiling. Astintosh can't help but notice how lavish the room is. A red rug sprawls along the floor, and multiple paintings hang all around the room. Some ornate furniture is in place as well. They walk across the room to another door.
"Here is the restroom sir, please clean yourself, as we have a dinner scheduled with you and their majesties." Says the guard.
Astintosh enters the restroom. Just as ornate as the the bigger room. Strange how quick a change of scenery that was. Straight out of a hell hole into a very clean environment. Astintosh shudders.
I definitely do not want to end up there again.
After a very uncomfortable and quick shower, Astintosh puts his clothes back on and dries off with a nearby towel. It's clear that the shower wasn't designed for him and the shampoo was very strange, mainly because there was two types. One for your "coat", and one for your "mane".
I'm starving. At least I don't have to eat those horrid MRE's again, especially those enchilada ones, straight through me every time.
"Sir, please follow us to the dining hall. You will receive your meal there." The guard said with a stoic face.
"Where can I get a shirt around here? We usually don't walk around naked. Some shoes would be nice as well." Astintosh said.
"I'm afraid we can't give you those things. The Princess does have a solution for you though."
Huge doors lumber over Astintosh and the guards, likely leading into the dining hall.
"please have a seat, your meal is already on the table."
Astintosh sits down, immediately munching down on the food, only to spit it out. Just then The two princesses arrive, and Astintosh stands on his feet.
"Please, sit and enjoy your meal." Says Celestia.
"Well it's just that, I don't usually eat...grass..."
"I'm terribly sorry about that. What does your kind normally eat?"
"Well I'd rather not sorry, we are sort of, omnivores."
"Well I have a simple fix and I might as well do it right now so you can eat. I'm sure you are hungry."
"What did you have in mind." Astintosh said nervously.
Am aura formed around Celestia's horn, and a beam of concentrated magic hits Astintosh, transforming him into...a pony of course.
"AHHHHHHHHH, WHAT DID YOU DO?!"
"Please don't fret, you'll find this will make life a lot more easier for you. Go ahead, try your meal now."
Astintosh slowly takes a bite of the steamed grass, only to find how tasty and scrumptious it is. As he takes a bite the juices flow over his taste buds. Almost orgasmic as Astintosh chomps down on the rest of the food.
"Wow...that was amazing."
After the strange yet fulfilling dinner, Astintosh lies in a bed that was given to him along with the guest room. The bed is about queen size, and comes with very comfortable pillows. A million times better than than the bed in the barracks he slept in back home. And not to mention it's quiet, no snoring soldiers.
So much has happened. I'm a...pony now?! What could possibly happen next? It's just so strange, for all of this to be happening. I have to be dreaming, but it feels so real. I miss home. My home away from home, and my real home. My family, they all probably think I'm dead. But what if I am? No I can't be. This is far off from any heaven, maybe it's hell? No, I have to keep optimistic. Maybe I'm in a coma. I'll just wake up and I'll be back home.
Astintosh slowly falls asleep in the cloud like bed. Night terrors commence right after...
"MOVE ASTINTOSH! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING! MOVE! STOP JOGGING AND RUN."
Boot camp. What a terrible fun place. Nothing like running ten miles with an eighty pound ruck on your back.
"Congratulations Corporal."
"Thank you sir."
Graduation day. Too bad my parents weren't there to see it. They barely had enough money as it is. Two parents with dead end jobs, plus they had to take care of me and my brother. Good thing there weren't drug junkies.
"Foxtrot to TOC."
"Send."
"We have spotted multiple armed soldiers armed with small arms and RPG's. On grid Eight, Seven, Five, Niner, Zero, Three, Five, Six, break. They have not spotted us and we will not engage until fired upon, over."
"Negative Foxtrot, fire at will. Engage the enemy until we say otherwise."
...
"Foxtrot report. Foxtrot can you hear us?"
....
TWANG BOOM
"RADIOMAN IS DOWN. MEDIC!"
Astintosh violently wakes up with a cold sweat. A tear rolls down his eye.
I'm still...not human...I have to talk to Celestia.
Astintosh gets up, wobbling over to the door still trying to figure out this walking thing.
"Excuse me, guards. I must talk to Celestia. It's very urgent."
"Right this way."
After travelling through numerous hallways and going up and down multiple staircases, they finally get out of the labyrinth of a building and reach Celestia's throne. Celestia sits proudly upon the big chair, showing her true omnipotent self.
"Your highness, Astintosh has wished to speak with you." Says one of the guards.
"Ah good morning Astintosh. Luna told me about your, fits during the night. Are feeling alright? You still look very tired." Celestia politely asks.
"I have a lot of questions that I must know. First of all, where am I?"
"Well, you are on Earth, in the land of Equestria. Where Unicorns, Pegasi, and Earth Ponies live united."
Earth? This place looks a lot different from the Earth I know. And this is starting to sound like Greek lore. Hehe, maybe I'll start seeing manticores and hydras.
"Second question, seeing as that I am now a pony. How do I really work this, 'horn'?"
"Every unicorn has magic stored in them. A very special power. Your horn focuses this energy into any spell that you have learned. But please, I wish to know, what happened in your nightmare?"
"I'd...rather not talk about it..."
"As you wish. Also I must mention it is very ironic, because I needed to talk to you to. Guards, leave us in privacy."
"Yes your highness." The guards mutter.
"Astintosh you must listen to me. What I'm about to tell you will be hard on you, and you will not take it lightly."
"Well, I have nothing to lose." Astintosh said.
"Because you are a human, you cannot show your face in public, due to some past occurrences I cannot talk about. But you now look the part, and you can go into to public. And there is another reason for this, not just so you can eat our food and talk with anypony outside the castle, but this was supposed to happen."
"W-what do you mean?"
"I mean you are a part of a legend, the so called 'Fabled'. The Fabled's purpose is defeat an evil, not known to mankind. A certain evil only you can defeat."
"So you're saying I'm some sort of legend? Oh no, that can't be correct, I'm just a soldier. Not the best either. You want the Navy Seals."
"Astintosh, listen to me. you only have some time to prepare for this, five years to be exact. This dark force tears through time and space, and upon his defeat, could bring you back home."
"What about the solar eclipse in thirty years?"
"Believe it or not, this was a recent development. My former student Twilight Sparkle has unknowingly asked me about this legend after her recent visit to the Royal Archives, she does not know you exist. No pony in Ponyville does."
"But I saw her in the library, and she saw me! So did the lizard!"
"I had to wipe out the entire towns memory. But, as part of your journey, you must advance your skills in magic, and you must gain contact with Twilight. She can teach you everything she knows. If I feel your skills are advanced enough, you will fight the enemy in human form, but we will get to that later, I have a summit to get to. There is a train ticket to Ponyville in your room. Top right drawer in the dresser along with some bits. Once in public you must speak the way every'pony' else does. Do not say the word 'hands' or 'feet'. Now I must be on my way Astintosh, till we meet again."
Astintosh sits back, jaw to the floor. In shock of what he has to now do.
