Pinkie Pie has by far proven to be the most felonious criminal in all of Equestrian history, and all of this would never have happened had she never been armed with the tenacious D. Oh well, time to put her down. And it seems the narrator was not the only one to come to this conclusion, for Pinkie’s friends had gathered outside the Sugarcube Corner with the same resolve. It was time they kill their friend before she kills everyone else with her deadly D.

It was noon, so Pinkie was in a diabetic coma and knocked the hay out. However if the remaining elements of harmony were to succeed in their mission, they would have to tread lightly lest they incur the wrath of the Pinkest D in the land. And so they gathered round the front of Pinkie Pie’s bedroom door to collaborate on what they should do.

“Alright.” Stated Twilight Sparkle, Alicorn princess and leader of this band of misfits and jerks. “We can’t let Pinkie Pie go on like this, she is just too OP. We need to murder her and keep her from ever using the D on anypony ever again. Any objections?”

All the ponies started nodding except for this yellow idiot who spoke up in such a low tone that it was practically a whisper. “But can’t we just take away the bucket?” Said the pony whose name was probably Butterfree or something lame like that.

“Fluttershy, there is a time and place for stupid suggestions and this is neither of those. Please never talk again or it’s back to the dungeon with you.”

“But, but I just.” And Fluttershy straight up broke down in tears like a kid who just watched Bambi.

Twilight clapped a hoof to her face in exasperation. “Alright alright, we’ll go with your plan.” She said, giving into the big baby.

And so Twilight burst through the door with her four friends, but all their massive preparation could not prepare them for the horrors in front of them. What they saw was Pinkie Pie without any clothes on passed out next to a bucket of Ds. The horror. The horror.

Anyways, they stealthily trampled over to Pinkie Pie and snatched up the bucket in unison and threw it out the window. Pinkie Pie woke up from the sound of her bedroom window shattering because of this and was totally freaking out. “Ah! Why are you all in my room?” She said, looking around.

“Pinkie, you were becoming a total nuisance with those Ds. We had to take them away from you before you killed us.”

“But guys, what’s a little old D going to do to any of you?”

Rainbow Dash took her turn speaking, for the first time in this story. “Pinkie, you murdered an entire family with those Ds.”

“I did?”

“Okay, maybe not, but still. You need to give up the D, it’s too tenacious for you.”

“Fine you guys.” And with this comforting thought the rest of her friends left her house. Once they were out of earshot, Pinkie began talking to herself. “But you never said anything about not going around with a bucket of Zs!”

The End.

Oh, crud, I almost forgot you might want to know where the bucket of Ds came from. Alright, well that’s kinda related to what happened outside when the bucket was thrown outside. So anyways when the bucket was thrown outside it totally clanged up on somepony’s head and they got knocked the buck out. And then another pony came up on the scene and was totally hype.

“Finally, I have found my bucket of Ds!” He exclaimed to the universe. “And now I, Dudley of Diamond Dallas Dude’s D Department and Deportmentorium shall be able to provide this world with all of it’s D and D accessory needs!” And so he picked the bucket up out of the pooling blood around the knocked out pony and ran back to start up his business.

Alright, so that should wrap things up. What’s that? You want to know about all this other bullcorn that was tangential for the story? Well too bad!

The End.

Author's Note

This is by far the most stupid, lame, and asinine story I have ever written. I didn't put an ounce of effort into any of the chapters, plot, or characters. I probably stole more jokes than made them, and I regret this story.

Why the hay is it one of my best?