My Little Pony: Quest for the Holy Grail

"Why.... is.... this...." gasped Alberto, as he slowly opened his eyes -- to discover that he was in near pitch darkness, and that Captain Hook was missing!!

"Ah, you're awake at last!" cried Big McIntosh. "Where are we anyways?"

"Beats me," said Alberto; "the last I recall, we were eating our dinner halfway at a kopitiam outside St Petersburg -- and then that was that..."

"There's only one explanation to this, if you allow me to say," said Shining Armour; "and that is that we clearly walked into some sort of booby trap after eating those sandwiches."

"And so -- that pony was most probably an agent of the evil forces under Sean Brink!! In other words, our quest has been discovered! Meaning we're done for!" cried Alberto. "We're as good as gone! I have failed in the quest!"

"NO! Alberto, we are NOT failed!" Big McIntosh scolded Alberto. "I don't care what happens, we're going to get out of here fast! And if we think we can do it, we'll do it! Fellow ponies, let's show Alberto what we mean!"

Knowing that Big McIntosh meant business, four of the other ponies -- Braeburn, Shining Armour, Dumbbell, and Thunderlane --  stood beside him, facing Alberto. In a chorus of five, they burst into song, in the hope of encouraging their human leader.

No matter what they tell us,

No matter what they do,

No matter what they teach us,

What we believe is true.

No matter what they call us,

However they attack,

No matter where they take us,

We’ll find our own way back!

I can’t deny what I believe,

I can’t be what I’m not.

I know our love forever,

I know no matter what!

If only tears were laughter,

If only night was day,

If only prayers were answered,

Then we would hear G-d say:

No matter what they tell you,

No matter what they do,

No matter what they teach you,

What you believe is true.

And I will keep you safe and strong,

And sheltered from the storm;

No matter where it’s barren,

A dream is being born!

No matter who they follow,

No matter where they lead,

No matter how they judge us,

I’ll be everyone you need!

No matter if the sun don’t shine,

Or if the skies are blue,

No matter what the ending,

My life began with you!

And I can’t deny what I believe,

I can’t be what I’m not.

I know our love forever,

I know no matter what!

Alberto heard those five pony voices, led by Braeburn and Big McIntosh, singing those very words to him; and these words jerked him into full wakefulness. He knew that these were loyal and furry friends, and they would do all they could to help him in this quest to retrieve the Holy Grail, no matter what.

Rising to his feet, Alberto took a deep breath. "We will find the Holy Grail today even if it means laying down our very lives!" he proclaimed boldly. The twelve ponies neighed in approval.

"I suggest," said Shining Armour, "that we start by following this weird-looking pink liquid. I've never seen anything like this before anyways. It seems to lead somewhere like a trail of some sort."

It certainly did; there was a pink-coloured liquid droplet trail on the floor all right and it certainly did seem to be going somewhere. "We'll follow it now," said Alberto.

This was most certainly the hall of an ancient castle, most probably no less than a century old if not more. The smell of vermin feces was present in the air. The brown stone walls were littered with slime and debris of all manner of description. There were a few banners scattered here and there, bearing logos symbolic of imperial Russia. And the good thing was -- there were a few tinderboxes on the ground, found by the party of six as they cruised through.

"Here's a fine thing!" said Big McIntosh, picking up a tinderbox. "These small matchboxes will come in handy if we need to light a fire! But first we've got to get out of this prison!"

"Well, something tells us we're not far from ground floor," said Dumbbell. "The staircase here goes up; it's our only chance though -- let's take it."

They followed the staircase in the next hall upward -- only to discover another long, winding corridor of slimy stone walls.... which eventually led them to a small hall where another staircase, smaller this time, led downwards to a door labelled: OLD ARCHIVES.

"Let's go in," said Alberto. "This is the only way."

The six ponies and their human leader opened the door and went in.

Meanwhile, Sean Brink and Dario Perez were deep underground in the Grail Vault in the Vaults of Heaven, watching over their beloved Holy Grail, the loot which they could now call all theirs. With them were Michael Valdez and his pet pony Cheese Sandwich.

"Wow! Well done!" said Brink. "Even if Aeron failed to bring it here, at least Cheese Sandwich succeeded!"

"It will be safe down here," said Cheese Sandwich; "you have Michael's and my guarantees on that. Right now I think Michael needs to brief you guys on something."

"Si," said Valdez. "I don't know why, but something tells me that there's a chance that the prisoners may be scheming enough to escape and kill our servants in the process. Which is why I need the both of you to help me stand guard."

"Stand guard? Here?? BOTH OF US???" gasped Perez.

"That has to be done," said Valdez, "if you are serious about keeping the Grail here. We had to put the prisoners somewhere within our eye view if we were to be sure that they would not escape. If we imprisoned them anywhere else other than in this very castle, they'd soon find us out using third-party aid. And you and I certainly don't want that. So...."

"So why didn't we just kill them on the spot?" asked Perez. "Finish off the job once and for all!"

"You know that every country has anti-assassination laws," said Valdez. "And Russia is no exception. You don't want to get arrested for wilfully killing twelve horses and one man, do you? Anyways. Here's the plan. Dario, you go and wait in the next room, which is the Vault Tunnels; and Sean, you wait in the Lair, which is beyond the Heavy Machinery Controls. Go now."

"But Michael, let us...." began Perez. But before he could finish, a thud was heard on the ceiling above.

"Kruzitürcken! The prisoners!" whispered Valdez. "They may have escaped! Go to your posts NOW!! And Cheese Sandwich, you stay here with me!"

And meanwhile, Alberto and his twelve pony companions had just entered the Old Archives. This was a slightly more well-furbished corridor as compared to the Rainy Hall that they'd been in earlier on. A few more tinderboxes were found. In one of the rooms there was also a sketch of a weird-looking humanoid creature which had ivory skin and a severely deformed mouth. The sketch was captioned: GRUNT. This kind of intrigued the ponies, especially Snips and Snails.

In this next room, there was also an old rusty sword on the ground. "Looks like this is our only weapon for now should we face any enemies," said Alberto, picking it up. He realised that there was an inscription on the sword's blade:

WHOSO PULLETH OUT THIS SWORD FROM THE STONE AND ANVIL IS RIGHTWISE KING BORN OF ALL ENGLAND

"Caramba!" cried Alberto. "This means...." He looked at the ponies; he realised that all twelve of them were staring at him with awe and adoration on their furry faces.

"Do you know what you've just found, Noble Don Alberto?" asked Shining Armour, giving Alberto a friendly tap on his head with his horn, the same way that his sister Twilight Sparkle had done nearly 20 days ago when she dubbed Alberto knight for the first time.

"What I've found, I can't say," said Alberto, "but what I do know and can say, is that we have to get out of here. My suggestion is that we go out the other door in this room. We have to find out where exactly we are before we can retrieve the Holy Grail."

They went through that very door and were in another corridor, which took them to yet another room. In this room there was  a shelf in the corner, and a desk next to that shelf which had -- another parchment!!!

"FINALLY! Just what we need!" cried Shining Armour.

"Sh sh!" Big McIntosh whispered. "Let's just pick it up and read it!"

"I'll do that!" whispered Alberto. He picked up the parchment and read, softly but aloud:

Do not fear, friends, you are closer to the Holy Grail than you think. Indeed, by the time you find this scroll, you are now in the Vaults of Heaven, a castle in St Petersburg which contains memorials of the Soviet era. You will have found Excalibur by the time you find this note; it is a very useful sword with certain magical powers, use it wisely. From the next room onwards, you will start to encounter one or more monsters here and there, many are hostile to you and want to kill you, so slay them with Excalibur. There may, however, be one or two friendly monsters who look like their hostile counterparts but actually are informants and are there to help you. You will be able to tell the hostile monsters and friendly monsters apart easily. This part of your journey should be no problems for twelve ponies and one biped to handle, given that you’re indoors and already have received some form of arms; whatever you do, just don't ever lose sight of one another, but stick close together at all times. Do NOT fail me. Sincerely, Twilight Sparkle

"So we're in the Vaults of Heaven! AT LAST!" cried Soarin.

"Sh!!!!" whispered Alberto. "Not so loud! I can hear growling of monsters! Quick! Let's get out of here!"

"It's a dead end!" said Braeburn.

"No, it isn't," said Shining Armour, his horn lighting up. "Something tells me to look to the wall to our immediate left."

Alberto walked to the left wall and found a lever. "I'll pull this?" he asked.

All six ponies nodded and snorted in approval. Alberto pulled the lever -- and the shelf moved, making a passage to the next room door! This door was labelled "ENTRANCE HALL".

"Let's go in there!" said Flash Sentry. "We need to show them what we're made of!

Hoy el pueblo cantará

Con gran coraje y voluntad

Esta es la música de un pueblo

Que reclama libertad.

Si al redoble del tambor

Tu corazón latiendo va

Es que la luz del nuevo día

Por fin vendrá.

A la causa te unirás

Que a todos libres nos hará

Por toda la ciudad

Barricadas se alzarán.

Ven únete al pueblo

Por fin las cadenas caerán.

Hoy el pueblo cantará

Con gran coraje y voluntad

Esta es la música de un pueblo

Que reclama libertad.

Si al redoble del tambor

Tu corazón latiendo va

Es que la luz del nuevo día

Por fin vendrá.

A tu patria te darás

Por este anhelo conseguir.

Unos cuantos vivirán

Y algunos vamos a morir.

La sangre en los campos de Francia

Los va a cubrir.

Hoy el pueblo cantará

Con gran coraje y voluntad

Esta es la música de un pueblo

Que reclama libertad.

Si al redoble del tambor

Tu corazón latiendo va

Es que la luz del nuevo día

Por fin vendrá!

And so singing, the twelve ponies and their human leader stepped into the Entrance Hall, hoping to find the Holy Grail somewhere in this huge castle. But just as they stepped into the Entrance Hall, red organic matter began to fill up the hallway they were in, startling them all....