Magnus: A Bum's Tale

My old man once said, "With crashes can come bangs." He was a wise man because when chaos is rampant only injustice can rain. Unfortunately, I may be part of the injustice at the moment.

"Stop thief!!!" Yeah... That's my life as about two seconds ago. This act was a living testament to the time I live in.Because either you're a big wig in your safe mansion, or just a lowly person living in the slums. There's no middle class anymore, and all that is because of Obama. All his talk about better economies, I shouldn't have voted for him. I'm lucky that some good people can visit in this small town to help those who need it. Otherwise things wouldn't be slowly getting better any time soon. In the end not even the government can help the normal people.

Thankfully, I escaped that old witch. I rounded a corner and waited for the voices of police and other people to leave. Carefully I looked around. No one was in the streets which was a rare occurrence. I sped along trying to find where I'm supposed to go. then I saw it. Two young kids in an alley. With a scrap of bread. I desperately need food. I approached them. They leaned back as far away from me as possible. Carefully I held both my hands up one empty the other with that pearl necklace I stole. Hopefully these kids will get better with my "help".

"Hey kids. Do you want to trade? With this you can buy yourselves at least 3 sandwiches." I whispered.

They didn't move. Carefully I inched toward them. Suddenly they took off taking my necklace with them. Sighing I head back to my base of operations. I guess this is the situation with that "have your cake and eat it too" scenario. I'm upset about the necklace ,but at least the economy will be slightly better.

Carefully, I inched through the streets avoiding any and all contact with police officers, rich guys, and people in general until I reached the local park. I walked along the path I've known for at least a year until I reached my home. A wet wooden bench under the shade of an oak tree. Yeah... home. I reached into the trash can pulling out some newspapers. There's less there then there was yesterday. I laid down on the bench and put the papers on m body and went to sleep hoping beyond hope that change would come. whether it be good or bad I do not care.

Before anything serious starts, I would like to say something about myself. I'm a brony. I have been one ever since I turned 21. Now I'm 24. You could say I'm a die hard brony, but ever since the bank took my house I could never see if there was any new content around or any cons. Even if I could the cops would probably find me around the same internet cafes around town. I've had to re-watch season 4 on an anonymous YouTube account.

I would give anything to be able to get on Internet again. Even if I had to watch that episode "May The Best Pet Win". Don't get me wrong it was exceedingly charming, but I didn't like it very much. Unfortunately,  I have never been able to check for any new episodes since I've run out of free internet hotspots. Now I'm poor as hell and sitting on a bench hoping I can find help.

Today was a cold rainy, day. The clouds were high in the sky deciding that today be their day to unload. The air was chilly as can be with the added use of water. Those were the first things in my mind as I awoke. Gently, I arose and sat on the bench with no where else to go. Thankfully, I had an umbrella ,so today wouldn't be a wet newspaper day, and when I looked around surveying the land around my bench like a landscaper I saw a man and a woman appear on the trail by my wet bench. Now this doesn't usually happen around this time of day and type of weather ,so you could imagine my surprise to find them strolling along.

The man was dressed in a twead business suit, a tad inappropriate for this weather, and the woman was wearing a satin dress that would surely be ruined in this weather if it weren't for the man's umbrella. It was rather clear to me that these folk weren't from around here as they were talking in a rather unique language and were wearing rather fancy clothes for this poor district of the city. I thought to myself, that's very strange for an immigrant to be all this way inland, but I guess tourists can go anywhere including this small town.  After they stopped talking, they finally noticed me.

The man asked, "Sir, why do you sit here alone in the cold and dreary afternoon, when you could be off sleeping at home in your bed with your family."

Thankfully I understood him this time as he was speaking English instead of ...whatever that was. I laughed strongly at my misfortune as well as the man's lack of knowledge about bums.

"My friend, you are rather fortunate to have a world that isn't against you. Always trying to make your life miserable. I'm an orphan. My parents were killed in a robbery at least 5 weeks ago, or so the government says. I was lucky enough to get enough money so I could take a few years of college. Right now, I don't even have a girlfriend!" I exclaimed.

I don't know where THAT came from. I didn't even want to tell this man about my life, but I guess when you've been all alone you might want an ear to listen to you.

The man looked at the woman with questions in his eyes. I could barely see the slow shake of his head when he turned slightly to the woman. He got out a pocket watch, and stared at it intently. It was a rather fancy watch. Intricate designs littered its surface. I couldn't get a better glimpse though because after a few seconds he put it back into his business suit.

With a frown on his face he said to me," I'm sorry about your family ,but what about your friends? Surely, they would let you stay at their houses, and maybe even let you live off their income for a while."

I reputed by saying," If only my friends weren't all the other bums living here or always drunk with their fancy wine. I do hear they are trying to quit so I could go over there, but I sincerely doubt that they would not harm me in one of their few drunken stupors. Even if they don't try to somehow in this world we're now living in you have to be careful wit the people you see on a daily basis."

This time though the woman looked at the man. She had a glint in her eyes that could be seen from space. For a while, I just sat there looking at them. The absence of conversation told me they were going back to do whatever they were doing before until they slowly turned to me smiling wide. It was jarring to say the least. Then the man stated, "Would you like to come into our house. We have more than enough money to cover for you. Thankfully that stock crash didn't hinder with our currency."

I started. Who in their right mind would take a random bum off the street? Thankfully, my morals had led me to believe that all people are capable of doing something in the world. With an open heart I gladly accepted and started of toward their house with his .....wife I think.

As I walked along that cobble road, I thought about how many more people are like the man and the woman out there helping people who need it. Not many that's for sure. Only a couple thousand people can be helped in the world. I'm lucky enough to find some kind souls to help a bum of the streets. That reminds me I never did ask their names ,didn't I? "By the way, what are your names?" I ask.

They look warily at themselves, the woman says," Well we can't be introduced as random strangers I guess, but first I want to know yours."

Well they're either have very good manners, or they just wanted to avoid the question. We walk in silence as I ponder whether or not to tell them. As time goes on they begin to stare at me, probably wondering what I'm doing. Hastily I answer her question. "I am Noland Pont ,madam. Now what are yours?"

"You may call me, Eda, and over here is Joan." she replies. I look at both of them as they smile at me. They were being rather creepy and silent on the way to their house. It was After a while the rain begins to stop and the moon comes out to shine over the land.

"Where is this house anyway? We've been walking for over an hour and we're just now coming unto the city limits." I finally query my trusty companions.

"It's right here." She points to..... nothing. "What are you trying to pull? There's nothing there!." I tell them. They begin to mumble to themselves. I can only make out," ....good...can't see....glamour...the one."

Everything was quite unsettling, including that last bit I could make out. They turn around to me and Joan announces, "You passed the test congratulations! You have the chance of a lifetime! We can grant you your wildest dreams!"

I look at both of them astonished. I have dreamt of this moment for my entire life. I have always wondered what it would be like to win a... *sigh* This isn't a free giveaway. Where would they even hide the house I've always wanted? Certainly not here. I asked, "Okay, where is it? Where's my prize? Where's my chance of a lifetime? Because all I see is that we're in the middle of fucking nowhere!"

They stand there shocked and looked at their hands for some reason. For some reason Joan says, "How the fuck are you doing this?" Wat. "How are you frickin blocking me?! How are you stopping my control?" Well, I think that either A: they're trolling me or B: they're bat-shit crazy. "Dude, I have absolutely no idea what you're talking about ,sooo I'm going back to my bench."

Eda says, "No wait stop we have your prize over here!"

I just calmly walk away. There's no need for me to be around crazy people. The world's already fucked to shit. There's no reason to fuck it more. When I finally walk far enough away, I retort, "If you try to contact me again, I WILL FUCK SHIT UP! I've had it up to here with trolls like you ,trying to spread hope to the hopeless just to put it into their face that no one will help them! I'm giving you a chance. Walk away from me. Do not do this again." If you can't tell I have varying degrees of anger issues.

"Stop!!!", they yell out as I walk away, but it's all in vain because I can barely hear them as I try to run back to my bench under that willow tree hoping for no rain to fall on my newspapers. I sincerely hope that they weren't trollers because if they had another guy, they would probably try to sabotage my newspapers.

All I can make out now as I'm running back into the city is," What..stop..shit...knock him out...TAKE HIM!"

Suddenly, I find myself becoming tense and I am now on the ground spazming out of control. Great, they have a Taser and DEAR GOD IT HURTS. Great, blackouts are happening. Hopefully when I wake up I won't be tied to a bed and be raped by both of these fuckers. With my luck, they are part of a gang or something hoping to get street cred because in this time anyone will do anything to survive.

Heh... Didn't think blackouts could look like this. A massive swirling black within the gray space everything was becoming. I don't know why I was tazed, but I do know that whatever type of Taser they had was enough to get me high. Ah well. All this pain will be over soon. Hopefully someone will find these two and get me out of their weird Taser, and maybe arrest them. Unfortunately, the cops might recognize me as the thief "plaguing" town, but if these people are going to lock me in a basement then I'll gladly accept jail time.