Chapters My Little Bow Chicka Bow Wow
Heaven In Blood Gualch
"Hey Caboose get the fuck over here and don't touch anything"Church snapped "Carolina when are we going to get to Blood Gualch?"
Carolina shot him a mean glare that caused church to shut up "Church I got you a new body the least you can do is shut up for one fucking ride"Carolina said furiously and we should be there In a few hours. Hey Grif can you drive this thing any faster Im getting tired of everybody complaining.
"Bow Chicka Bow Wooouchh What the fuck was that for Baby" Tucker said in pain
"Call me baby again and see what happens" Carolina snapped
"Nahh I think im good. Hey Caboose what the fuck are you drawing?"
"I am drawing a land full of pony's because I love pony's!" Caboose yelled
"Bow Chicka Bow Wow" Tucker saw that everybody was giving him a annoyed look so he decided to sit down and shut up"
"Hey Grif remeber what happed last time you landed the pelican I believe someone else should land it" Simmons Said
Caboose opened his mouth to say somthing then everybody in unison said"No!"
"But im good with Vehicles rember I drove that robot crane thingy Simmions?"
"All you fucking did was press buttons anybody can press buttons"Simmions yelled
"But I love buttons" Caboose gawked
"And plus that wasnt even a vehicle it was a crane Caboose"
"Hey Caboose remeber the tank thats a good reason you shouldnt ever touch a vehicle again!" Church snaped
"Shut up idiots were here so lets get moving I wanna find the director and get out of here" Carolina snaped
"What if he isnt here where are we going to look next" Church said sarcastly that caused Carolina to give him a evil look and caused him to shut up
"Sarge Simmons Grif Wash check the Red Base while the rest of us are going to Blue base check for clues or any sign that lets out that somthing has been tamperd with or they left somthing behind"
"Why should I take orders from you ya Dirty Blue" Sarge growled
"Because I will rip your skull out and beat you with it" Carolina snapped
"Why thats not even physically possible" Sarge Grunted
"Why dont you tell Tex that Sarge?" Church chuckled
"Why in the sam hell would I do that she is dead " Sarge grunted
"She is not fucking dead she cant die she is a AI" Chruch yelled
"Yeah thats what Grif says about his sister but we all know she is dead" Sarge chuckled
"She isnt dead" Grif yelled she has to be here somwhere I know it then why dont you go look Sarge said
After a few hours of checking the base sitting around talking Simmons was called over to the blue base
"Hey Maroon guy you know about these teleporters right we saw a tool box next to one and was wondering if you could tell us if its been tampered with or not?" Chruch asked
"Yes and i have a name ya know"Simmions sighed and said "Let me check it out"He looked on the control pannel and noticed that it had been changed to a unfamiliar setting he said "maybe we should go in the teleporter and see where it goes?"
"Yeah good idea he said and walk right into a ambush and get killed" Church chuckeld
"Why do you even care you cant die so maybe you should go" Simmons grunted
"I love portals"Caboose yelled and ran and jumped into the portal Church yelled "Caboose wait!"
"He is a lost cause just leave him in there" Carolina snapped
"Caboose might be annoying and stupid but he is innocent and he is my friend" Church then jumped into the teleporter after Caboose
Caboose and Church woke up to see two Horse's standing over them one pink with cotton candy looking hair and then a Purple one with a horn.
He heard the pink horse say "Oooooh Can we keep them" he heard excitement in her voice and it reminded him off Caboose
"He is waking up Twilight get over here"
"Hey are you alright you have been out for hours we was getting worried so where are you from?"As soon as she said that Doctor Hoofs walked in the room.
"They are healthy and free to go they are some healthy Ponies I must say"
"Ponies?" Church and Caboose said in unison looking down at them selfs and realized he was a fucking pony"Dammnt he mutterd"
Author's Note
Hey Ik this probly sucks but let me know what i could do with it and how i should fix it and know what you think of it
My Little Bow Chicka Bow Wow
"You guys can stay with me if you want till we figure this out she looked over to see Caboose and Pink Pony have been talking caboose Church frowed
"Oh no not two of them my life is little bit more hell now" Church grunted
Twilight gave him a perplexed look and realized he meant that caboose is like Pinkie she thought too herself well at least they well get along she sighed and forced a smile at the two who seemed just perfectly alike.
"Im Twilight this is Rarity This is Applejack and thats Rainbow Dash and thats Fluttershy and thats Pinkie with Caboose over there whats your name" she smiled
"Church" He grunted looking outside at how everybody was so happy and he knew he couldn't ever be happy "I gotta get home this place its too happy for me" he grunted
Twilight sighed and said "you cant get home that pond you came up was a one way portal i tried sending you back with a spell i just couldn't I'm sorry but we will try to get you back home just for now come stay with me till we get this figured out"
"Sure not like where i came from was heaven anyway" Church sighed
Pinkie then stood up and said "Can Caboose stay with me he is so fun to be around"
Twilight looked at Church and said "do you mind if Caboose stays with Pinkie"
"Hell no he can stay there as long as he wants"Church chuckled knew he was gonna be away from Caboose "Maybe ill like this place after all" as the Elements of harmnony looked at him with a greeting smile.
Twilight said "well we should probably be get going its getting late don't want to get home after dark come on church ill show you where you'll be sleeping"
"Okay" Church jumped out of the bed and fell down not used to being a horse "sorry im not used to being on all fours and walking on hoofs" That earned church a stare from everybody in the room He sighed
"It was nice meeting you church" all the girls said in unison as they walked out
"Where did you come from" Twilight asked
"Its a long story that involves Ghost a alien baby and a computer that tells corny jokes maybe ill tell you some other time when we have time" Church chuckled
Twilight smiled perplexed not sure if he was joking or not she said ok as they walked back to the library in silence
"Great im going to be living in a fucking tree" Church muttered
"Somthing wrong with trees" Twilight asked not sure what was so bad about trees
"No only that there dangerous and scary and could kill us at anytime there is no problem with trees i only ripped my balls on one when i was little" Church said sarcastically
"Im sorry I live in a tree and you dont have to worry its dead its not going to kill us" Twilight sighed
"You killed a tree" Church chuckled
"No! It was here before I moved to Ponyville from Canterlot and im not sure how it died actually" Twilight knew she was going to have trouble with church she sighed
As they walked into the tree she noticed that Spike had passed out on the floor she used her magic to lift him up into his bed Church said "who was that and how did you do that"
Twilight hushed him and told him to be quiet said that was Spike and how he was here assistant and other stuff
"Ok so where am i going to be sleeping haven't actually haven't truly rested my whole life" He sighed
"This way Twilight told him and led him to his bed Goodnight if you need anything come get me" Church laid down laying around trying to get conformable not used to being a pony
Twilight went downstairs to try to find somthing she could do to get Chucrh and Caboose back home she sighed and Said "Maybe ill just go see the princess tomorrow they could help"
My Little Bow Chicka Bow Wow
Reds with Blues
"So who is going after Church and Caboose?" Tucker said breaking the silence Carolina said
"Tucker Wash Simmons and Sarge you guys will go after them" "What" they said in unison "Well we cant leave our team behind so we gotta get them besides anyways we need Church" Carolina sighed
"Okay we will go but I don't know how long it will take us Carolina" Washington sighed
"Just get them and get out as fast as possible got it"
"Why should I help the blues" Sarge gawked
"Because if you don't i will shoot you" Carolina sighed wondering how stupid they truly are.
"we should probably get going now we want to do this as fast as possible as they walked in Tucker the last to go into the portal tripped messing up the settings on the portal "Fuuuu" he yelled as they came out on the other side
"Where are we" Sarge said Looking down and seing that he had hoofs "and why am I a fucking horse?"
Wash grunted "lets just get them and get out of here as fast as possible" they all walked through the Everfree forest we they finally reached the end they ended up on a farm with and orchard of apples they all looked with astonishment as they saw the huge farm and they saw a orange pony and Washington walked up to her
"Howdy can I help yal with sumthin" she said in a hick accent
"Yes" Washington sighed "Have you seen are friends Church and Caboose?"
"Sure have There staying with Twilight at the library did you come from the same place as they did?"
"Yeah i would explain but it would take a while I want to get them and get back as fast as possible"
"Its that way go towards town square and keeping walking strait on and you will make it to the library but ya might want ta reconsider staying because Twilight hasn't found a way back for you guys yet"
Sarge grunted great now I'm stuck here in a girly world full of ponies just great im blaming all of this on Grif!" Simmons sighed
"Grif had nothing to do with this sir"
"Thank you for that wonderful information" Wash grunted
"Yall are welcome if ya need anything you can stop by and ask for Apple jack pleasure meeting Yall"
Washington said "Ok wondering how stupid these ponies actually are and if they understand sarcasm
They all walked toward the town in silence till Tucker Said "Bow Chicka Bow Wow" They all looked at him funny
"What was that for nobody said anything we were walking in silence" Washington grunted
"Well that's why i said it to cheer things up you guys are all being mopey.
"Maybe its because were all stuck in a world full of fucking ponies Tucker" Washington snapped
"Bow Chicka Bow Owww What the fuck guys why hit me in my pride"
"Because you are fucking annoying dont you guys ever know how to shut up the Freelancers did"
"Well last time I checked were not fucking Freelancers you fucking black banana"
"What did you call me your the only black one here lazy cockbite" as they reached the door of the library Twilight with Church saw his friends arguing
"At least I know how to get laid fucking dick I mean for god sakes you killed donuts
"Shut the fuck up" Church yelled wishing his friends wernt here
"Are they your friends" Twilight asked with a sigh
"Yes unfortunately" Church looked them with a fierce look and growled "Were going to pick up Caboose and go see the Princess so I guess you have to come now"
"Why in the hell would i listen to you blue" Sarge grunted
"If you want to get home you will" Church growled church thought to himself why am i even fucking alive I cant even die.
"Hey Church how long do you think we will be here Carolina kinda wanted us to get back as fast as possible and we dont want her to get mad" Tucker asked
