The Ultimate Cliché

Chapter 4

"Whadaya' mean, you can stand on clouds!" There Fluttershy was standing on a mother fucking cloud! All the physics the Twilight just taught me flew out the window that very second.

"Your first step is to get to me. Don't worry I teach baby birds how to fly, this shouldn't be much harder." She gave me a very reassuring smile. It didn't help at all.

I remember a few years back, I was at a party, and my friends convinced me that holding ten or so plastic bags would be the equivalent of a full sized parachute. Remember, that in freshmen year I was dumber than a rock (no offence to Pinkie's sister). I broke both my legs, jumping off the roof that night. And till this day heights always seemed to eat away at my inner soul, causing me to do some rash things.

"Well time to go get a ladder." After a couple minutes of searching, I found the correct sized ladder. I bought it up, and slid it over to the cloud. But Fluttershy stopped it before it hit the cloud.

"that's not a very smart idea."

Fluttershy, let go of the ladder."

"I wouldn't use the ladder if I were you."

"Ah, screw it, hold the ladder if you want I'm climbing up." I was about half way up when Fluttershy was beginning to strain herself from my weight. That is when her hooves slipped and my ladder hit the cloud. Unfortunately the ladder was not a Pegasus and fell straight through it, me still clinging on for dear life. By reflex my wings flung out in an attempt to control myself. What happened instead was a perfectly executed dive bomb into a tree.

"Hey! That was great! You're improving!"

"Are you kidding me! I almost became a tree!"

The mare sighed underneath her breath and muttered, "lucky you..."

This is where faze two came into play. I put my ladder instead of on the cloud, onto a roof. Being a basket ball star, I know I have a good vertical. but as a pony? Oh I was sooooo very wrong. Once again, did the tree face the wrath of my face slamming into it.

"try flying first before you really hurt yourself!"

"flying is the only thing that's been hurting me so far!"

"Just try flapping your wings!" flapping my wings felt kind of like shaking the sand out of a beach towel.

"okay now what!"

"now jump!" I Leaped forward with as much strength as I could muster, for flapping my wings was hard enough. I went about ten feet into the air and dropped back down. "That was great now just keep on practicing with that you deserve a lunch break first though. here have some bits so you can buy something.

"Uh aren't I supposed to be paying you?"

"Well since you don't have any bits you also can't get a job."

"Why not?"

"just look at your flank, you have your cutie mark."

"Cutie mark?" I recalled when Twilight told me what a cutie mark is. It shows what your special talent is. well no talent no job, I guess... that's when remembered Tyler. It would be so easy to find him, now that I knew he too, would be a blank flank.

"alright Fluttershy i have to get going, thanks for the money!"

Trotted up to the nearest store careful to follow the exact pattern Twilight had taught him.

"Hello sir" the store clerk had a very peppy attitude. "What can I get you?"

"One hamburger please." The stallion looked very confused.

"Uh, excuse me?"

"One hamburger, do you not sell them?"

"I-I don't think so"

"Well what about a hotdog"

"No?"

"Do you sell any kind of meat? Come on, hurry up! I'm hungry!"

"You sick bastard. First mareijuana now their selling meat! The black market is getting messed up nowadays."

"Oh shit! I forgot, ponies are vegetarian!"

"Well do you sell any thing else here?"

"We have dandelion sandwiches, they're our specialty."

"Alright I'll have that."

"One dandelion sandwich coming up!" he dropped him voice down to a whisper. "by the way kid, stay off the streets, your a good looking guy, i wouldn't want you getting royally bucked because of the shit they sell.

"okay?" after a few minutes my meal was done and had been dropped off at my table. I noticed something important, how do I eat this? no hoofs might work... the slammed my face down into the dish eating as much as could. People started staring, so I stopped. maybe with hoofs. my meal ended up falling on the floor making a very sad me.

That's when i saw a blue unicorn, with no cutie mark.